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How to Cultivate Willpower? 4 Simple Ways to stimulate your abilities to achieve your goals.

How to Cultivate Willpower? 4 Simple Ways to stimulate your abilities to achieve your goals.

There are two aspects of your life. You are either happy or you are trying to be happy. When we are happy, we wonder less about the truths and psychologies and why stuff works the way it works. We let the flow keep. However, when things aren’t going too well, our energies deplete. It’s how long you can survive in the face of those depleting energies that define your success or failure.

And your ability to survive that state of mind is willpower.

But, before we can learn how to cultivate willpower, we should rightfully try to figure out what diminishes it in the first place. Primarily, consider your subconscious mind as a huge hard disk that stores large amounts of data, in fact it stores every moment of your life and organizes them to form beliefs and behavioral patterns.

It stores everything you experience and the emotion that’s attached to that source. Lack of willpower indicates prolonged programming of your subconscious using negative notifications.

“They can conquer who believe they can. He has not learned the first lesson is life who does not every day surmount a fear.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

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Procrastination at work, loss in relationships, lack of exercise, unhealthy diet, being fired, divorce, non-cooperation in the family, misconceptions. Every trauma a person passes through decreases his power to control. He loses willpower with every experience that reminds him of his underachievement.

“In the absence of willpower the most complete collection of virtues and talents is wholly worthless.” – Aleister Crowley

Cultivating willpower is the most important thing you can do to achieve something worthy. It is the very foundation of your success and ability to strive for greatness. But, how do you do it?

Here are the 4 simplified steps to generate willpower.

1. Distract yourself

Most researchers of the 20th century claimed that willpower was flexible. The famous Marshmallow Experiment by Walter Mischel explains this just right. The researchers conducted a study with kids as to how the minds of children reacted to a greater reward if they were to abstain from having something, in this case, another marshmallow.

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Results? It was found that kids who had high willpower to keep themselves from giving in used simple distractions like singing, patting the table and keep themselves busy doing thing so that their minds could wait a little longer until the time expired and they received a another marshmallow as reward.

Your willpower diminishes with every thought of the instant gratification. If you are looking for a greater reward, keep yourself distracted from the immediate achievement.

 2. Use consequences to power your actions

There are two aspects to this. Many psychologists have an opinion that thinking about the negative outcomes might actually strengthen willpower and some others claim that positive outcomes actually help you push a little more.

Fortunately, both are valid. You just need to know when to use what. If you are in bad mood, low energy, and your goals look blurred, use the positive consequences to boost and motivate yourself.

On the other hand, when you’re in good mood, full of energy and yet lacking willpower, try convincing yourself using the negative method. This works because our minds tend to move from one energy point to another.

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3. Make the climb, without the rope

Remember that scene from The Dark Knight Rises when that doctor advises Bruce Wayne to climb the pit without the rope? That’s what you need to try to strengthen your willpower.

After graduation, I was very fearful about finding a new job. I would frequently get anxious and overwhelmed at the thought of it. I would keep searching classified but apply for none. I found that my willpower diminished every time I put off applying for an interview.

Fortunately, I learned to get out of my comfort zone and face the fear. It is, of course, not always that simple, but if you can convince yourself for a short span of time that there’s nothing else you can do but get the job done, your willpower will build quickly.

Willpower is the resource you plug into when most of the external circumstances needed to sooth you are missing.

 4. Keep reminding yourself about your willpower

What will you get if you show a little more courage right now? Your mind needs its share of motivation. What is it that makes this work worth doing? Remind yourself about the rewards and you’ll be much more positive when approaching your goals.

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There’s a willpower equation which says {Willpower = Motivation + Reward – Pain.}
So, if your pain is more than your level of your motivation + reward, you’ll find your willpower diminishing, it might even get to the point at which you would want to give up.

Kelly Mcgonigle, the author of “The Willpower Instinct,” suggests that simple actions like brushing your teeth with your non-dominate hand or a simple good night’s sleep can help boost your willpower. These activities somehow send a reminder about your raw abilities to your subconscious, which helps stimulate your willpower.

Here’s what you can do. Write down a list of activities or chores you’ve been avoiding. Choose the easiest items on it and do them. It will instantly make you feel better. Remind yourself about your willpower using tiny achievements.

List one small achievement every day

The process of cultivating your willpower needs practice. Here’s what you can do about it. Every day, make it a routine to get done one of the many things you’ve been avoiding in the past. It could be as simple as organizing your closet. Gradually, build your willpower by using tiny achievement and then moving on to bigger ones.

Featured photo credit:  American Football with the Goal via Shutterstock

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7 Simple Steps to Build a Successful Mindset How to Un-Clutter Your Mind and Stay Focused on Life Essentials How to Cultivate Willpower? 4 Simple Ways to stimulate your abilities to achieve your goals. How to Revamp your Life and Stop Procrastinating in Two Months

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Last Updated on October 16, 2019

Invaluable Lessons You Can Learn From Your Mistakes

Invaluable Lessons You Can Learn From Your Mistakes

Do you like making mistakes?

I certainly don’t.

Making mistakes is inevitable. Wouldn’t it be wonderful if we could be at ease with them?

Perhaps there is a way to think of them differently and see their benefits.

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Why Mistakes Feel Dangerous

Mistakes often feel dangerous. Throughout human history, our errors have often been treated as dangerous for a variety of reasons:

  • Our vulnerability. We have limited and fragile support systems. When those systems fail, people often lose their lives.
  • Real dangers. Nature can be dangerous, and making mistakes can put us at the mercy of nature and its animal residents seeking a meal.
  • Ignorance. Many cultures scapegoats someone whenever there is a failure of some kind. Scapegoating can be serious and deadly.
  • Order. Many societies punish those who do not conform to the prevailing orthodoxy and treat difference and non-conformity as a mistake. Even our brains flash an error message whenever we go against prevailing social norms.

We have a history of handling mistakes and failure in an unpleasant way. Since each of us carries our human history with us, it can be a challenge to overcome the fear of making mistakes.

If we can embrace the reality of mistakes, we can free ourselves to be more creative in our lives and dig up some interesting insights.

Why We Can’t Avoid Making Mistakes

Many people operate under the notion that making mistakes is an aberration, a mistake if you will. You can call it perfectionism but it is a more substantial problem. It is really a demand for order and continuity.

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When we think we can eliminate mistakes, we are often working from a perspective that sees the world as a fixed place. The world, however, is not so obliging. Like it or not, the world, and everything in it, is constantly changing.

Change is more constant and pervasive than we can see with our own eyes which is why we often miss it. Our bodies are constantly changing. The natural conditions of the earth change constantly as well. Everything, including economic and cultural systems have life cycles. Everything is in a constant state of flux.

We cannot see all of the changes going on around us since rates of change vary. Unfortunately, when we try to create a feeling of certainty and solidity in our lives or operate from the illusion of stability and order, we are fighting reality and our natural evolution which is built on adapting to change.

It is better to continually bend into this reality rather than fight every change we experience. Fighting it can cause us to make more mistakes. Finding the benefits in change can be useful and help us minimize unnecessary mistakes.

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Lessons Learned from Making Mistakes

Life has so many uncertainties and variables that mistakes are inevitable. Fortunately, there are many things you can learn from making mistakes.

Here is a list of ways to harness the mistakes you make for your benefit.

  1. Point us to something we did not know.
  2. Reveal a nuance we missed.
  3. Deepen our knowledge.
  4. Tell us something about our skill levels.
  5. Help us see what matters and what does not.
  6. Inform us more about our values.
  7. Teach us more about others.
  8. Let us recognize changing circumstances.
  9. Show us when someone else has changed.
  10. Keep us connected to what works and what doesn’t work.
  11. Remind us of our humanity.
  12. Spur us to want to better work which helps us all.
  13. Promote compassion for ourselves and others.
  14. Teach us to value forgiveness.
  15. Help us to pace ourselves better.
  16. Invite us to better choices.
  17. Can teach us how to experiment.
  18. Can reveal a new insight.
  19. Can suggest new options we had not considered.
  20. Can serve as a warning.
  21. Show us hidden fault lines in our lives which can lead us to more productive arrangements.
  22. Point out structural problems in our lives.
  23. Prompt us to learn more about ourselves.
  24. Remind us how we are like others.
  25. Make us more humble.
  26. Help us rectify injustices in our lives.
  27. Show us where to create more balance in our lives.
  28. Tell us when the time to move on has occurred.
  29. Reveal where our passion is and where it is not.
  30. Expose our true feelings.
  31. Bring out problems in a relationship.
  32. Can be a red flag for our misjudgments.
  33. Point us in a more creative direction.
  34. Show us when we are not listening.
  35. Wake us up to our authentic selves.
  36. Can create distance with someone else.
  37. Slow us down when we need to.
  38. Can hasten change.
  39. Reveal our blind spots.
  40. Are the invisible made visible.

Reframe Reality to Handle Mistakes More Easily

The secret to handling mistakes is to:

  • Expect them as part of the process of growth and development.
  • Have an experimental mindset.
  • Think in evolutional rather than fixed terms.

When we accept change as the natural structure of the world, our vulnerability and humanness lets us work with the ebb and flow of life.

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When we recognize the inevitability of mistakes as part of the ongoing experiment which life is, then we can relax more. In doing so we may make fewer of them.

It also helps to keep in mind that trial and error is an organic natural way of living. It is how we have evolved over time. It is better to be with our natural evolution than to fight it and make life harder.

When we adopt an evolutional mindset and see ourselves as part of the ongoing human experiment, we can appreciate that all that has been built up over time which includes the many mistakes our ancestors have made over thousands of years. Each one of us today is a part of that human tradition of learning and experimenting,

Mistakes are part of the trial and error, experimental nature of life. The more you adopt the experimental, evolutional frame, the easier it becomes to handle mistakes.

Handling mistakes well can help you relax and enjoy all aspects of life more.

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Featured photo credit: Sarah Kilian via unsplash.com

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