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10 Things People With Effective Communication Skills Have In Common

10 Things People With Effective Communication Skills Have In Common

Whether you’re ordering pizza delivery or dialing 911 for emergency care, effective communication can carry you through all aspects of life. It’s important, it’s essential and it’s not too hard to master.

While some excellent communication skills are inherent, those not naturally gifted with these traits can certainly practice to perfection.

As entrepreneur Brian Tracy said, “Communication is a skill that you can learn. It’s like riding a bicycle or typing. If you’re willing to work at it, you can rapidly improve the quality of every part of your life.”

In order to be the best communicator that you can be, look at the list below. The 10 following attributes belong to true communication experts:

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1. They Listen

“We have two ears and one mouth and we should use them proportionally,” says Susan Cain author of Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking.

Excellent listening is an essential skill in effective communicating. Being able to absorb what others say allows one to come up with appropriate responses. Great communicators don’t create one-sided conversations, because what’s the point of that?

They never try to think of responses as others are still speaking, because they don’t want to risk losing track of what is being said. By holding on to every word in the conversation, good communicators know just what fits when it comes time to speak.

2. They Can Relate to Others

As they listen intently, people with effective communication skills gain an understanding of their audience. Be it a room full of people, a group of online subscribers or just one other person, they can tailor their message for the specific listeners at hand.

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It’s absolutely necessary to have some insight regarding your crowd, because without that understanding, your words will fall flat. You wouldn’t want to praise burgers and pork chops to a group of PETA members while trying to win them over, would you? The understanding is beneficial for all members of the dialogue, as the messages are clear and all parties feel understood.

3. They Simplify the Complex

Some messages can be complicated, confusing or absolutely muddled. The good communicator, though, can take these messages and make them clear and concrete for his audience. Think of a teacher describing a new concept to an algebra class – if he can’t make the complicated understandable, his lesson will never get across to the students. By breaking down or rephrasing content, great communicators make the message more digestible to more people.

4. They Know When to Speak Up

Understanding when dialogue is required will always be helpful in good communication. Say, for example, an employee at work is slacking off or failing to understand a concept. A boss that recognizes the need for a conversation will be much better off than a boss that wordlessly sweeps the issue under the rug. They know when to speak up, and when it will do them good versus the instances in which it’s best to be quiet.

5. They Are Available

Whenever you need the excellent communicator, they make themselves available. They give you answers and don’t leave you hanging. They’re not the boyfriend that disappears and doesn’t text back for hours on end; they’re not the boss that has no time to explain assignments. Good communicators lead complete discussions, with which all parties are satisfied.

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6. They Practice Confidence

A good communicator knows she is a good communicator. She doesn’t hide behind vague language and she speaks loud and clear. Her air of confidence earns the trust of the audience, as she demonstrates that she knows what she’s talking about.

7. They Are Specific

If you’re going to get your message across, you’re not going to beat around the bush. Good communicators have a clear, concise point and there is no mistaking just what that is. She’ll give detailed instructions or ask targeted questions – she’ll leave no room for confusion.

Why, asks the communicator, would she waste time trying to sugarcoat her message with vague language? She’d much rather share it in a straightforward manner and avoid confusing the listener.

8. They Focus on Their Interactions

A big part of communicating well and respectfully is eliminating distractions from interactions. No one likes to be mid-conversation to have the other party start texting or shoving food in its face. By ridding his environment of these things, the good communicator is focused solely on the message and audience.

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9. They Ask Questions

Again, in an effort to best understand the audience, a good communicator uses questions – ones that are filled with specifics – amply. They fill any gaps of confusions with answers, not assumptions. Any knowledge gained through questioning helps to better fulfill the audience as well as to better get the communicator’s message across.

10. They Recognize Non-Verbal Cues

When chatting face-to-face, body language can be just as important as the words being spoken. Recognizing frustration, nervousness or excitement via non-verbal signals – like posture, facial expression and eye contact – helps the great communicator to understand her audience. In turn, she can better tailor her message to match the attitude of said audience.

Practicing these skills and improving your ability to communicate is worth your time and effort. As successful businessman Paul J. Meyer said, “Communication – the human connection – is the key to personal and career success.”

Featured photo credit: Anna Levinzon via flickr.com

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Kayla Matthews

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Last Updated on November 15, 2018

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

What do you think it takes to achieve your goals? Hard work? Lots of actions? While these are paramount to becoming successful in reaching our goals, neither of these are possible without a positive mindset.

As humans, we naturally tend to lean towards a negative outlook when it comes to our hopes and dreams. We are prone to believing that we have limitations either from within ourselves or from external forces keeping us from truly getting to where we want to be in life. Our tendency to think that we’ll “believe it when we see it” suggests that our mindsets are focused on our goals not really being attainable until they’ve been achieved. The problem with this is that this common mindset fuels our limiting beliefs and shows a lack of faith in ourselves.

The Success Mindset

Success in achieving our goals comes down to a ‘success mindset’. Successful mindsets are those focused on victory, based on positive mental attitudes, empowering inclinations and good habits. Acquiring a success mindset is the sure-fire way to dramatically increase your chance to achieve your goals.

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The idea that achieving our goals comes down to our habits and actions is actually a typical type of mindset that misses a crucial point; that our mindset is, in fact, the determiner of our energy and what actions we take. A negative mindset will tend to create negative actions and similarly if we have a mindset that will only set into action once we see ‘proof’ that our goals are achievable, then the road will be much longer and arduous. This is why, instead of thinking “I’ll believe it when I see it”, a success mindset will think “I’ll see it when I believe it.”

The Placebo Effect and What It Shows Us About The Power of Mindset

The placebo effect is a perfect example of how mindset really can be powerful. In scientific trials, a group of participants were told they received medication that will heal an ailment but were actually given a sugar pill that does nothing (the placebo). Yet after the trial the participants believed it’s had a positive effect – sometimes even cured their ailment even though nothing has changed. This is the power of mindset.

How do we apply this to our goals? Well, when we set goals and dreams how often do we really believe they’ll come to fruition? Have absolute faith that they can be achieved? Have a complete unwavering expectation? Most of us don’t because we hold on to negative mindsets and limiting beliefs about ourselves that stop us from fully believing we are capable or that it’s at all possible. We tend to listen to the opinions of others despite them misaligning with our own or bow to societal pressures that make us believe we should think and act a certain way. There are many reasons why we possess these types of mindsets but a success mindset can be achieved.

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How To Create a Success Mindset

People with success mindsets have a particular way of perceiving things. They have positive outlooks and are able to put faith fully in their ability to succeed. With that in mind, here are a few ways that can turn a negative mindset into a successful one.

1. A Success Mindset Comes From a Growth Mindset

How does a mindset even manifest itself? It comes from the way you talk to yourself in the privacy of your own head. Realising this will go a long way towards noticing how you speak to yourself and others around you. If it’s mainly negative language you use when you talk about your goals and aspirations then this is an example of a fixed mindset.

A negative mindset brings with it a huge number of limiting beliefs. It creates a fixed mindset – one that can’t see beyond it’s own limitations. A growth mindset sees these limitations and looks beyond them – it finds ways to overcome obstacles and believes that this will result in success. When you think of your goal, a fixed mindset may think “what if I fail?” A growth mindset would look at the same goal and think “failures happen but that doesn’t mean I won’t be successful.”

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There’s a lot of power in changing your perspective.

2. Look For The Successes

It’s really important to get your mind focused on positive aspects of your goal. Finding inspiration through others can be really uplifting and keep you on track with developing your success mindset; reinforcing your belief that your dreams can be achieved. Find people that you can talk with about how they achieved their goals and seek out and surround yourself with positive people. This is crucial if you’re learning to develop a positive mindset.

3. Eliminate Negativity

You can come up against a lot of negativity sometimes either through other people or within yourself. Understanding that other people’s negative opinions are created through their own fears and limiting beliefs will go a long way in sustaining your success mindset. But for a lot of us, negative chatter can come from within and these usually manifest as negative words such as can’t, won’t, shouldn’t. Sometimes, when we think of how we’re going to achieve our goals, statements in our minds come out as negative absolutes: ‘It never works out for me’ or ‘I always fail.’

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When you notice these coming up you need to turn them around with ‘It always works out for me!’ and ‘I never fail!’ The trick is to believe it no matter what’s happened in the past. Remember that every new day is a clean slate and for you to adjust your mindset.

4. Create a Vision

Envisioning your end goal and seeing it in your mind is an important trait of a success mindset. Allowing ourselves to imagine our success creates a powerful excitement that shouldn’t be underestimated. When our brain becomes excited at the thought of achieving our goals, we become more committed, work harder towards achieving it and more likely to do whatever it takes to make it happen.

If this involves creating a vision board that you can look at to remind yourself every day then go for it. Small techniques like this go a long way in sustaining your success mindset and shouldn’t be dismissed.

An Inspirational Story…

For centuries experts said that running a mile in under 4 minutes was humanly impossible. On the 6th May 1954, Rodger Bannister did just that. As part of his training, Bannister relentlessly visualised the achievement, believing he could accomplish what everyone said wasn’t possible…and he did it.

What’s more amazing is that, as soon as Bannister achieved the 4-minute mile, more and more people also achieved it. How was this possible after so many years of no one achieving it? Because in people’s minds it was suddenly possible – once people knew that it was achievable it created a mindset of success and now, after over fifty years since Bannister did the ‘impossible’, his record has been lowered by 17 seconds – the power of the success mindset!

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