“Gossip is the art of saying nothing in a way that leaves practically nothing unsaid.”- Walter Winchell
Office gossip is alive and well and likely to continue into the next millennium. One study done by the University of Amsterdam has revealed that 90% of the conversation in the workplace can only be defined as gossip. It has also wormed its way into office emails where it is estimated that it occupies about 15% of office communications.
Now, gossipy colleagues may actually perform a useful function, if the gossip remains at a harmless level. It can also be quite funny and entertaining as in the BBC’s classic TV show The Office. Gossip can also fill a gap when office communications and management are inadequate.
But what can you do if you have gossipy colleagues who are hell-bent on character assassination or who are determined to gain an advantage by spreading certain rumors? It can be a negative force and can fuel resentment, fear, envy and low morale. This is when office gossip becomes the ugly face of office politics.Advertising
Here are 7 actions to take when you have gossipy colleagues.
1. Take action to stop negative gossip
If you are in a team leader role, you may have to take decisive action against individual colleagues who are indulging in negative gossip which is affecting morale and also productivity. This will have to be done on a one-on-one basis.
It will be up to you to keep the lines of communication open so that negative gossip never gets a foothold. Damaging gossip is fueled by a lack of appropriate communication.
2. Ask penetrating questions
“I know nothing more annoying when people I don’t know jump to conclusions on my person based on nothing but gossip or speculation.”- Nikolaj Coster-Waldau
If you find a colleague who is telling you doubtful details about a co-worker, try to pin her/him down. You can also ask for more details which will usually get a rather vague response. You can ask detailed questions about when and why various incidents occurred. The idea is to put the gossipy colleague in a difficult position which will expose him or her for what they really are – a gossip-monger.
3. Stay out of the gossipy colleagues’ radar
“Gossip is the Devil’s radio” – George Harrison
If you decide to have no part in this type of gossip, you can very frankly say that you are just not interested in harmful conversations about colleagues. The gossiper will then leave you alone as he will view you as a poor gossip-monger. You can feel proud that you have taken such a stance. If all your colleagues did that, then this destructive gossip would dry up. Gossipy colleagues with no audience are dead in the water.
4. You can threaten to repeat the gossip to the victim
Gossipy colleagues hate this because they know that they will be exposed. Just say that you intend to repeat back to the hapless victim what you have just heard.Advertising
5. Being friendly with the office gossip will not protect you
“Who gossips to you will gossip of you” -Turkish proverb
You might prefer to take a more friendly approach. You might think that tolerance will go far and that you can handle the gossip in a light-hearted way. The only problem is that gossips talk about everyone so you may soon be a target!
6. Teamwork can work well
Try teaming up with your other co-workers. You can play a prank with their help. Invent some gossip about yourself and tell the gossiper that it is top secret. Let your colleagues know and when the gossiper tells everyone, you can confront her and ask her why she betrayed your trust on such a confidential matter. That should silence the muckraker.
7. Talking at the water cooler
This is where you will hear a lot of office gossip. If you find that the topic is the usual one about the uncertain future of the company, or some nasty back stabbing, then try to change the subject. Bringing up a neutral topic like a sports competition, food, sleep, or weather can often break up the gossipy colleagues. If you do not want to be involved at all, then tell them you have an urgent deadline to meet.Advertising
Avoiding harmful and horrible gossip is feasible if you follow the pointers above. The best solution is to steer clear of gossip when possible, and when you can’t, invent an excuse to get away. Urgent phone calls and meetings are very useful!
Have you worked with gossipy colleagues and how did you deal with them? Let us know in the comments below.
Featured photo credit: Gossip Girls / Art G. via flickr.com
Last Updated on August 20, 2018
Quit Your Job If You Don’t Like It, No Matter What
Do you know that feeling? The one where you have to wake up to go to your boring 9-5 job to work with the same boring colleagues who don’t appreciate what you do.
I do, and that’s why I’ve decided to quit my job and follow my passion. This, however, requires a solid plan and some guts.
The one who perseveres doesn’t always win. Sometimes life has more to offer when you quit your current job. Yes, I know. It’s overwhelming and scary.
People who quit are often seen as ‘losers’. They say: “You should finish what you’ve started”.
I know like no other that quitting your job can be very stressful. A dozen questions come up when you’re thinking about quitting your job, most starting with: What if?
“What if I don’t find a job I love and regret quitting my current job?”
“What if I can’t find another job and I get in debt because I can’t pay my bills?”
“What if my family and friends judge me and disapprove of the decisions I make?”
“What if I quit my job to pursue my dream, but I fail?
After all, if you admit to the truth of your surroundings, you’re forced to acknowledge that you’ve made a wrong decision by choosing your current job. But don’t forget that quitting certain things in life can be the path to your success!
One of my favorite quotes by Henry Ford:
If you always do what you’ve always done, you’ll always get what you’ve always got.
Everything takes energy
Everything you do in life takes energy. It takes energy to participate in your weekly activities. It takes energy to commute to work every day. It takes energy to organize your sister’s big wedding.
Each of the responsibilities we have take a little bit of our energy. We only have a certain amount of energy a day, so we have to spend it wisely. Same goes for our time. The only things we can’t buy in this world are time and energy. Yes, you could buy an energy drink, but will it feel the same as eight hours of sleep? Will it be as healthy?
The more stress there is in your life, the less focus you have. This will weaken your results.
Find something that is worth doing
Do you have to quit every time the going gets touch? Absolutely not! You should quit when you’ve put everything you’ve got into something, but don’t see a bright future in it.
When you do something you love and that has purpose in your life, you should push through and give everything you have.
I find star athletes very inspiring. They don’t quit till they step on that stage to receive their hard earned gold medal. From the start, they know how much work its going to take and what they have to sacrifice.
When you do something you’re really passionate about, you’re not in a downward spiral. Before you even start you can already see the finish line. The more focus you have for something, the faster you’ll reach the finish.
It is definitely possible to spend your valuable time on something you love and earn money doing it. You just have to find out how — by doing enough research.
Other excuses I often hear are:
“But I have my wife and kids, who is going to pay the bills?”
“I don’t have time for that, I’m too busy with… stuff” (Like watching TV for 2 hours every day.)
“At least I get the same paycheck every month if I work for a boss.”
“Quitting my job is too much risk with this crisis.”
I understand those points. But if you’ve never tried it, you’ll never know how it could be. The fear of failure keeps people from stepping out of their comfort zone.
I’ve heard many people say, “I work to let my children make their dream come true”. I think they should rephrase that sentence to: “I pursue my dreams — to inspire and show my children anything is possible.”
Think carefully about what you spend your time on. Don’t waste it on things that don’t brighten your future. Instead, search for opportunities. And come up with a solid plan before you take any impulsive actions.
Only good things happen outside of your comfort zone.
Do you dare to quit your job for more success in life?
Featured photo credit: Unsplash via unsplash.com