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15 Things Only Self-Disciplined People Would Understand

15 Things Only Self-Disciplined People Would Understand

If you are a person with a good amount of self-discipline, you have no doubt been labeled as prudish and boring, and maybe even excluded from some of the fun. After all, you abstain from such foolishness, right?

You and I both know that this label is not only insulting, but inaccurate as well. Self-disciplined people are usually full of hope and creativity, and use their discipline as a tool to accomplish epic feats. Theodore Roosevelt captured this well by remarking, “With self-discipline, most anything is possible!” But being boring isn’t the only misconception about the self-disciplined. Here are 15 other things only self-disciplined people would understand.

1. You are not better at fighting temptation, just better at avoiding it

Self-discipline is often defined as being able to take a stronger stand against temptation than a less disciplined person. Essentially, if two co-workers are staring at a box of donuts in the break room, the self-disciplined one abstains, and the other one doesn’t.

But according to a recent study, self-disciplined people don’t focus on deprivation; rather, they focus on managing conflicting goals. Maria Szalavitz, a neuroscience journalist for TIME.com put it this way, “Self-control […] may not consist so much of being better at resisting temptation, but at finding better ways to avoid it.”

To reuse our earlier example, the self-controlled co-worker avoids the break room, so they don’t have to deny the donut in the first place.

2. You are more satisfied in life than those without self-discipline

This same study found that higher levels of self control were linked to a higher level of satisfaction in life. So while the perception is that self-discipline kills all the excitement and fun, statistically this isn’t true. When you practice self-discipline you feel more confident about who you are, and get more of what you really want. It may take longer, but you eventually receive it, which builds satisfaction that is deeper than immediate gratification.

So while you may have had to avoid the donut, in it’s place you have created a toned and fit body that you can now proudly flaunt at the beach, so the satisfaction is deeper and creates positive feelings that last longer.

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3. You get to do more of what you want, not less

When others are looking at a self-disciplined person from the outside in, all they may see is what the disciplined person is not doing, but what they often fail to see, is what they are doing.

Self-discipline is born from a desire to move beyond a current situation and to break out of a comfort zone. In order to do this, a person must decide what they do want out of life, and get rid of what they don’t. Most people run through life being entirely reactive, so they don’t realize how much they do things that they don’t want to.

You may no longer get to watch your favorite TV show, but now you’re writing the book you always wanted to. If you’d been asked whether you’d give up your book for the TV show, you would have said no, but by not assessing these things, you were unaware of what you were trading.

Because self-disciplined people assess, they get to do more of what they really want.

4. You enjoy conquering yourself

While the idea of turning down a great party so you can wake up early to go jogging seems like a recipe for negative emotions, it’s actually the opposite. You may be bummed you missed your friends, and maybe even doubt your resolve, but when you’re jogging towards your goal the next morning, a huge dose of self-respect and admiration comes over you.

There’s a thrill in conquering yourself. It builds your self belief and gives you a lasting high, which further motivates you to continue conquering yourself. This is no boring life without excitement, but rather a thrilling game of conquering your inner demons.

5. You live more fully in the moment

While a large attribute of self-discipline is that you’re working towards a bigger goal, the necessary focus on choices you’re making in the moment, requires you to be more aware of what’s going on right now.

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Being aware of the moment allows you to experience life more fully, and you will notice more accurately how the people and environment you surround yourself with affect you. Because of this, you put yourself in more positive situations and remember them with more clarity. Which brings me to my next point:

6. You are better at setting boundaries

“A man without decision of character can never be said to belong to himself. . . He belongs to whatever can make captive of him.” – John Foster

As you change your surroundings to meet your end goals, you will begin to notice that some people encourage you, and others work against you. Having this knowledge gives you a better understanding of how the people in your life are affecting you, and since you value your goals, it encourages you to set boundaries against people standing in your way.

For example, if you are trying to change your eating habits, there may be others who will begin to sabotage your efforts. They’ll buy you food presents, or stock the freezer with your favorite ice cream. They may invite you out for pizza and a beer and make you feel guilty for not socializing.

Before you decided to change those habits, you may not have noticed this person was a catalyst towards unhealthy eating. Now that you’ve made a change, you’ll see this fact clearly and have the power to stop it.

7. You know yourself better than the average person

“Competing is exciting and winning is exhilarating, but the true prize will always be the self-knowledge and understanding that you have gained along the way.” – Sebastian Coe, four-time Olympic medalist and chairman of the LOCOG

There’s a huge gap between theory and reality. No matter how much you analyze the way you think you’ll react in a given situation, you don’t really know until you do it. Self-discipline forces you into action, and as you take the steps necessary to achieve your goal, you learn a lot about who you really are and what you are capable of.

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8. You feel freer with self-control

“Self-discipline is a form of freedom. Freedom from laziness and lethargy, freedom from the expectations and demands of others, freedom from weakness and fear – and doubt. Self-discipline allows a pitcher to feel his individuality, his inner strength, his talent. He is master of, rather than slave to, his thoughts and emotions.” – H.A. Dorfman, The Mental ABCs of Pitching

Self-discipline is often viewed as constricting, but when you practice it, you begin to realize how constricting not being disciplined was. You can see more clearly how your culture, bad habits, and addictions were controlling you all along, and now that you are in control, you get to have more of a say in how you live.

9. You are more successful at achieving long term goals

Time and time again, when studies are done on successful people, the most common denominator between them is self-discipline. In an article, quoting 25 of the greatest self-made men in history, Sean Combs (P. Diddy) states,

“I’ve never been surprised about what happened to me. I’ve put in hard work to get to this point. It’s like when you become a lawyer – if you’re bustin’ your ass, you’re not surprised when you get your degree. I came in to win, you know. This is why I stay up late while other people are sleeping; this is why I don’t go out to the Hamptons.”

He has a net worth estimated at $324 million.

10. You have a higher level of self belief

Every little promise you keep to yourself builds a layer of self belief. The more promises you keep, the bigger you feel. The bigger you feel, the higher you reach – and the higher you reach, the more belief you build. It’s a cycle that leads to success.

This is why you’ll make your bed every day, or put your shoes away. In the end, you know that even these little tasks lead to great success. It may seem insignificant to outside eyes, but building self-belief is the key to continuing on and having what it takes to succeed.

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11. You know discipline takes energy

When you’re low on sleep or feeling hungry, it becomes extremely difficult to muster up the willpower needed to overcome the obstacles in front of you. According to a recent study, every act of self-control takes a withdrawal from your energy bank. So the more you have to practice it, the more your energy for self-discipline is depleted. When that energy runs out, you can no longer have self-control.

Because of this, you know that eating healthy (and often), as well as getting a good night’s sleep, are crucial to maintaining the energy needed to practice self-discipline.

12. You still have fun

Having self-discipline doesn’t exclude you from having fun. In fact, you can enjoy fun more fully, because you don’t carry the guilt of knowing you’ve done something you’ll regret in the morning. You are fully aware that your priorities are covered and you can now relax and partake in the action.

13. You know that what you DO is more important than how smart you are

In a study of 140 8th grade students, it was found that students who ranked high in self-discipline outperformed their more impulsive peers on every academic-performance variable including report-card grades, standardized achievement-test scores, admission to a competitive high school, and attendance. More specifically, they found that self-discipline was more of an indicator for success than high IQ, which is generally thought to be more important.

While being intelligent offers many advantages, it can only take you so far. Having the discipline to do what it takes to get things done is what equals success. The more you practice self-discipline, the more you see this to be true.

14. The more you do it, the better you get

Because self-discipline is a culture in and of itself, the more you practice it, the more it becomes a part of your comfort zone. When you first started along the road of self-discipline, you were fighting your old culture of immediate gratification and the new culture felt uncomfortable. The more in control you feel, the act of slipping into uncontrolled gratification becomes an uncomfortable feeling. The scale continues to tip the more self-control you introduce to your life. This makes more self-discipline easier in the long run.

15. Nobody is disciplined all the time

While being self-disciplined is satisfying, productive, and easier the more it is practiced, no one is self-disciplined all the time. Knowing this fact helps you to forgive yourself for relapses and continue moving forward toward your goals. This “moving forward” after a failure is a crucial trait for the self-disciplined and one that is required for success. As Ralph Waldo Emerson so eloquently put it, “our greatest glory is not in never failing, but in rising up every time we fail.”

Featured photo credit: Unsplash – Olu Eletu via download.unsplash.com

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Last Updated on July 18, 2019

What Makes People Happy? 20 Secrets of “Always Happy” People

What Makes People Happy? 20 Secrets of “Always Happy” People

Some people just seem to float through life with a relentless sense of happiness – through the toughest of times, they’re unfazed and aloof, stopping to smell the roses and drinking out of a glass half full.

They may not have much to be happy about, but the simplicity behind that fact itself may make them happy.

It’s all a matter of perspective, conscious effort and self-awareness. Listed below are a number of reasons why some people are always happy.

1. They Manage Their Expectations

They’re not crushed when they don’t get what they want – or misled into expecting to get the most out of every situation. They approach every situation pragmatically, hoping for the best but being prepared for the worst.

2. They Don’t Set Unrealistic Standards

Similar to the last point, they don’t live their lives in a constant pursuit towards impossible visions of perfection, only to always find themselves falling short of what they want.

3. They Don’t Take Anything for Granted

Happiness rests with feeling fulfilled – those who fail to stop and appreciate what they have every now and again will never experience true fulfillment.

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4. They’re Not Materialistic

There are arguing viewpoints on whether or not money can really buy happiness; if it can, then we know from experience that we can never be satisfied because there will always be something newer or better that we want. Who has ever had enough money?

5. They Don’t Dwell

They don’t sweat the small things or waste time worrying about things that don’t really matter at the end of the day. They don’t let negative thoughts latch onto them and drain them or distract them. Life’s too short to worry.

6. They Care About Themselves First

They’re independent, care for themselves and understand that they must put their needs first in order to accommodate the needs of others.

They indulge, aim to get what they want, make time for themselves and are extremely self-reliant.

7. They Enjoy the Little Things

They stop to smell the roses. They’re accustomed to find serenity when it’s available, to welcome entertainment or a stimulating discussion with a stranger when it crosses their path. They don’t overlook the small things in life that can be just as important.

8. They Can Adapt

They’re not afraid of change and they work to make the most out of new circumstances, good or bad. They thrive under pressure, are not overwhelmed easily and always embrace a change of pace.

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9. They Experiment

They try new things, experience new flavors and never shy away from something they have yet to experience. They never order twice from the same menu.

10. They Take Their Time

They don’t unnecessarily rush through life. They work on their own schedule to the extent that they can and maneuver through life at their own relaxing pace.

11. They Employ Different Perspectives

They’re not stuck in one perspective; a loss can result in a new opportunity, hitting rock bottom can mean that there’s no where to go but up.

12. They Seek to Learn

Their constant pursuit of knowledge keeps them inspired and interested in life. They cherish information and are on a life-long quest to learn as much as they can.

13. They Always Have a Plan

They don’t find themselves drifting without purpose. When something doesn’t go as planned, they have a plan for every letter in the alphabet to fall back on.

14. They Give Respect to Get It

They are respectful and, in turn, are seen as respectable; the respect they exude earns them the respect they deserve.

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15. They Consider Every Opportunity

They always have their eyes open for a new road, a new avenue worth exploring. They know how to recognize opportune moments and pounce on them to make the most of every situation. Success is inevitable for them.

16. They Always Seek to Improve

Perpetual self-improvement is the key towards their ongoing thirst for success. Whatever it is they do, they take pride in getting better and better, from social interactions to mundane tasks. Their pursuit at being the best eventually materializes.

17. They Don’t Take Life Too Seriously

They’re not ones to get offended easily over-analyze or complicate matters. They laugh at their own faults and misfortunes.

18. They Live in the Moment

They don’t live for tomorrow or dwell on what may have happened yesterday. Every day is a new opportunity, a new chapter. They live in the now, and in doing so, get the most out of every moment.

You can learn how to do so too: How to Live in the Moment and Stop Worrying About the Past or Future

19. They Say Yes

Much more often than they say no. They don’t have to be badgered to go out, don’t shy away from new opportunities or anything that may seem inconvenient.

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20. They’re Self-Aware

Most important, they’re wholly aware of themselves. They self-reflect and are conscious of their states of mind. If somethings bothering them, they fix it.

We’re all susceptible to feeling down every now and again, but we are all equipped with the necessary solutions that just have to be discovered.

Lack of confidence, inability to feel fulfilled, and susceptibility to stress are all matters that can be controlled through the way we handle our lives and perceive our circumstances.

Learn about How Self-Reflection Gives You a Happier and More Successful Life.

Final Thoughts

The main philosophy employed by the happiest includes the idea that life’s simply too short: life’s too short to let things get you down, to take things for granted, to pursue absolute and unrealistic perfection.

For some, employing these characteristics is a second nature – they do it without knowing. For others, a conscious effort must be put forth every now and again. Self-Awareness is key.

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Featured photo credit: Charles Postiaux via unsplash.com

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