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Last Updated on June 16, 2020

18 Basic Rules for Leading a Fulfilling Life

18 Basic Rules for Leading a Fulfilling Life

Being fulfilled is an awesome feeling, but unfortunately, it’s a feeling that many have trouble finding. Fulfillment is an easy concept on the surface, yet it’s so elusive. However, living a fulfilling life is well within the reach of everyone. Here are 18 ways to discover some fulfillment.

1. Come to peace with the way things are.

“If only I had more money, I’d…”

Or, “If I had more time, I’d…”

How many times do you hear people say these daily? Many times, I bet.

People are so obsessed with what they don’t have that they never allow themselves to be satisfied with what they do have in life. Constantly having a mindset of wanting more and more will squash any chances you have of acceptance. Embrace acceptance and watch your stress levels go down.

2. Take timeouts in life frequently.

Every so often, it’s good to hit the pause button on life and soak in the moment. Life can get hectic with work, relationships, and stress leading us to not realize how awesome life is.

Take time out of your busy day and smell the roses.

Finding the beauty and joy in the everyday mundane will allow countless little epiphanies and revelations, which will not only broaden your horizons, but make you grateful for all the things that are overlooked on a day-to-day basis.

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3. Include some gratitude in your daily life.

Focusing on the negative leads to you becoming a toxic individual. Practicing gratitude has a myriad of benefits, such as happiness, more optimism, and better health.

Challenge yourself to practice gratitude by writing or telling someone one thing you’re thankful for each day.

4. Spice up your life with some daily thrills.

Life is meant to be one big adventure, so get to exploring. Become daring and start saying yes to things you always talk yourself out of. Learn a new skill such as ballroom dancing, or go skydiving.

5. Treat yourself like royalty.

Do you beat yourself up over things that happened in the past? If so, then you need to stop that immediately.

It’s time to forgive yourself and stop living in the past. If you don’t show respect and kindness to yourself, then how can you expect someone else to? How can someone else see how awesome you are if you can’t see it yourself?

6. Eat in a way that is satisfying and healthy.

Eating healthy doesn’t entail the daily consumption of boring and bland meals, such as steamed chicken and broccoli. If fat loss is your goal, living a fulfilling life and eating awesome, tasty foods is very doable.

Eating healthy should please your palate and your fitness goals.

7. Make exercise a priority, not an exception.

If you care about living longer, having more energy, and wanting to look younger, then look no further than exercising to take care of all those needs.

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From improving your mood to improving your physical health, exercise is a no-brainer. If you feel like you’re too busy to workout, here’re 5 Ways to Find Time for Exercise.

8. Stop making life so difficult.

Sometimes, life is meant to be simple. Stop overanalyzing everything and making every decision complicated and complex. Life isn’t meant to be filled with stress. Chill out and take a walk through the park or go have a quiet and relaxing dinner.

9. Punch fear in the face and get to living.

Fear is a natural part of our lives. Conquering fear starts in our heads and the mindset that we approach fear with. Experiencing failure provides value when it comes to living a fulfilling life and being the best version of yourself. Through failures, you’ll learn lessons that will make you a better person down the road.

Learn Why You Have the Fear of Failure (And How to Overcome It).

10. Stop letting others determine your self-worth.

When you compare yourself to others, you’re devaluing yourself. Looking at someone else’s life from the outside is the same as looking at a highlight reel. Who knows how long it took them to get to their current position? Don’t compare your life to others.

“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.”– Eleanor Roosevelt

Here’s How to Raise Your Self Worth and Trust Yourself More.

11. Kick all your negative company to the curb.

Life is far too short and awesome to deal with negative people who are full of toxic thoughts and habits. Keeping negative people around guarantees you’ll be unhappy and miserable.

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Equate negative people to mosquitoes and put some repellent on so they can’t suck the life out of you. These are 10 Toxic Persons You Should Just Get Rid Of.

12. Learn to enjoy your own company.

Don’t become reliant on other people’s company or feel the need to be in a relationship to feel complete. Being in a relationship needs to come from a want, not a need. Embrace the notion of being your own best friend. Learn the 10 Things That Happen When You Start to Enjoy Being Alone.

13. Commit to being a lifelong learner.

Those who desire to live a fulfilling life need to have a curious and hungry mind. By being a lifelong learner you realize that there’s a vast world out there that is waiting for exploration and adventures.

By constantly learning, you’re increasing your knowledge and perspective of the world. Learn How to Develop a Lifelong Learning Habit.

14. Escape from all the craziness that lives in your head.

The story that exists in your head is not even close to the actual day-to-day story that you live. Eliminate all those negative thoughts and replace them with positive ones. Positive thinking leads to positive results.

15. Challenge yourself to become a social butterfly.

Make an effort to connect with more people, smile, and maintain eye contact a little longer than normal. This forces you to become more open to the world, leading to greater connections.

When meeting new people, choose people from all different backgrounds and beliefs. This allows you to become a more well-rounded individual.

16. Embrace living outside your comfort zone.

If you never take yourself outside of your comfort zone, you’ll never know what you’re capable of in life. All the magic in life happens outside your little box. By staying inside your shell, you will only produce a mediocre version of yourself.

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Start living outside your comfort zone today by doing something you normally wouldn’t do. Try these 10 Ways To Step Out Of Your Comfort Zone And Overcome Your Fear.

17. Go for your dreams and let no one take them from you.

You can’t be afraid to go after what you want. Following your dreams is a vital part of living a life of fulfillment and shouldn’t be overlooked.

Everyone says to follow your dreams, but few do. You only get to live through this thing we call life once, so you might as well make the best of it and live it on your own terms.

18. You should quit being so serious 24/7.

Would you please have a sense of humor and smile? Not everything is a matter of life and death. Feel free to take time off from playing the role of Captain Serious and joke around and act stupid.

Laughter helps people live longer, while also reducing blood pressure. The world would be a better place if we would all quit taking ourselves so seriously and live the moment.

Featured photo credit: Antonette Marie via unsplash.com

More by this author

Julian Hayes II

Author, Health & Fitness Coach for Entrepreneurs, & Speaker

18 Basic Rules for Leading a Fulfilling Life Starting Today, Stop These 6 Things to Become the Best Version of Yourself 5 Fun Ways to Transform Your Body And Health When You Don’t Feel Like Going to the Gym 4 Common Reasons Why You Fall Short With Your Weight Loss Goals (And What You Should Do Instead) 7 (Surprising) Actions to Take For Guaranteed Fat Loss

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Last Updated on August 6, 2020

6 Reasons Why You Should Think Before You Speak

6 Reasons Why You Should Think Before You Speak

We’ve all done it. That moment when a series of words slithers from your mouth and the instant regret manifests through blushing and profuse apologies. If you could just think before you speak! It doesn’t have to be like this, and with a bit of practice, it’s actually quite easy to prevent.

“Think twice before you speak, because your words and influence will plant the seed of either success or failure in the mind of another.” – Napolean Hill

Are we speaking the same language?

My mum recently left me a note thanking me for looking after her dog. She’d signed it with “LOL.” In my world, this means “laugh out loud,” and in her world it means “lots of love.” My kids tell me things are “sick” when they’re good, and ”manck” when they’re bad (when I say “bad,” I don’t mean good!). It’s amazing that we manage to communicate at all.

When speaking, we tend to color our language with words and phrases that have become personal to us, things we’ve picked up from our friends, families and even memes from the internet. These colloquialisms become normal, and we expect the listener (or reader) to understand “what we mean.” If you really want the listener to understand your meaning, try to use words and phrases that they might use.

Am I being lazy?

When you’ve been in a relationship for a while, a strange metamorphosis takes place. People tend to become lazier in the way that they communicate with each other, with less thought for the feelings of their partner. There’s no malice intended; we just reach a “comfort zone” and know that our partners “know what we mean.”

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Here’s an exchange from Psychology Today to demonstrate what I mean:

Early in the relationship:

“Honey, I don’t want you to take this wrong, but I’m noticing that your hair is getting a little thin on top. I know guys are sensitive about losing their hair, but I don’t want someone else to embarrass you without your expecting it.”

When the relationship is established:

“Did you know that you’re losing a lot of hair on the back of your head? You’re combing it funny and it doesn’t help. Wear a baseball cap or something if you feel weird about it. Lots of guys get thin on top. It’s no big deal.”

It’s pretty clear which of these statements is more empathetic and more likely to be received well. Recognizing when we do this can be tricky, but with a little practice it becomes easy.

Have I actually got anything to say?

When I was a kid, my gran used to say to me that if I didn’t have anything good to say, I shouldn’t say anything at all. My gran couldn’t stand gossip, so this makes total sense, but you can take this statement a little further and modify it: “If you don’t have anything to say, then don’t say anything at all.”

A lot of the time, people speak to fill “uncomfortable silences,” or because they believe that saying something, anything, is better than staying quiet. It can even be a cause of anxiety for some people.

When somebody else is speaking, listen. Don’t wait to speak. Listen. Actually hear what that person is saying, think about it, and respond if necessary.

Am I painting an accurate picture?

One of the most common forms of miscommunication is the lack of a “referential index,” a type of generalization that fails to refer to specific nouns. As an example, look at these two simple phrases: “Can you pass me that?” and “Pass me that thing over there!”. How often have you said something similar?

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How is the listener supposed to know what you mean? The person that you’re talking to will start to fill in the gaps with something that may very well be completely different to what you mean. You’re thinking “pass me the salt,” but you get passed the pepper. This can be infuriating for the listener, and more importantly, can create a lack of understanding and ultimately produce conflict.

Before you speak, try to label people, places and objects in a way that it is easy for any listeners to understand.

What words am I using?

It’s well known that our use of nouns and verbs (or lack of them) gives an insight into where we grew up, our education, our thoughts and our feelings.

Less well known is that the use of pronouns offers a critical insight into how we emotionally code our sentences. James Pennebaker’s research in the 1990’s concluded that function words are important keys to someone’s psychological state and reveal much more than content words do.

Starting a sentence with “I think…” demonstrates self-focus rather than empathy with the speaker, whereas asking the speaker to elaborate or quantify what they’re saying clearly shows that you’re listening and have respect even if you disagree.

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Is the map really the territory?

Before speaking, we sometimes construct a scenario that makes us act in a way that isn’t necessarily reflective of the actual situation.

A while ago, John promised to help me out in a big way with a project that I was working on. After an initial meeting and some big promises, we put together a plan and set off on its execution. A week or so went by, and I tried to get a hold of John to see how things were going. After voice mails and emails with no reply and general silence, I tried again a week later and still got no response.

I was frustrated and started to get more than a bit vexed. The project obviously meant more to me than it did to him, and I started to construct all manner of crazy scenarios. I finally got through to John and immediately started a mild rant about making promises you can’t keep. He stopped me in my tracks with the news that his brother had died. If I’d have just thought before I spoke…

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