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12 Things High Self-Esteem People Don’t Do

12 Things High Self-Esteem People Don’t Do

Having high self-esteem is important. Without it, you’re not likely to ever gain any other esteem in life. The thing about self-esteem is everyone who has a high level acts essentially the same. We all have different hopes, dreams, experiences, and paths, but confidence is universal. Here are the things people with high self-esteem avoid.

1. They Don’t Compare Themselves to Others

People with low self-esteem are constantly comparing their situation to others – no matter what you say to them, they’re “going through the exact same thing.” On the other hand, people with high self-esteem show empathy and compassion, but they focus on themselves instead of how others are doing.

2. They’re Not Mean-Spirited

People with low self-esteem bully others. They take pleasure in putting other people down. People with high self-esteem see no need to down other people, choosing instead to encourage and celebrate successes.

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3. They Don’t Let Imperfection Ruin Their Day

Perfectionism isn’t necessarily a bad thing, but obsessing over making everything perfect is a sign that you have low self-esteem. Those with high self-esteem disconnect from the results and do their best without expecting perfection.

4. They Stop Dwelling on Failure

It’s common to hear people with low self-esteem dwelling on all the ways things will go wrong. They’re positive their every failure signals an impossible task. People with high self-esteem discover why they failed and try again.

5. They Avoid Devaluing Their Self-Esteem

People with high self-esteem value their own perception of themselves – they understand that they come first and don’t feel guilty about taking care of themselves. They believe charity starts within, and if they don’t believe that, they’ll never have a healthy self-image.

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6. They Don’t Try to Please Anyone

They can’t please all the people all the time, so confident people focus on pleasing themselves – just not within school zones. Doing what makes you happy, regardless of how everyone else feels, is a sign of high self-esteem.

7. They Don’t Close Themselves Off

Confident people are always open about themselves. It’s those with low self-esteem that hide all the best parts of themselves behind an emotional wall. Instead of keeping the real you a secret, be open and honest in all your dealings.

8. They’re Not Followers

People with low self-esteem don’t believe they can lead, so they end up following others. Rather than seeking a sense of belonging, people with high self-esteem walk their own paths and leave it to others to follow them.

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9. They Don’t Fish for Compliments

If you’re constantly seeking compliments, you’re not confident. People with high self-esteem always do their best (and go out of their way to do good deeds) because it’s what they want to do, not because they’re seeking recognition. If you need to hear compliments, say them to yourself in the mirror.

10. They’re Not Lazy

People work harder when they have high self-esteem because they’re not bogged down by doubts and complaints. Those with low self-esteem end up procrastinating and wasting their energy thinking about all the work they have to do rather than rolling up their sleeves and just getting it done.

11. They Don’t Shy Away from Risks

When you trust yourself, you’ll be willing to participate more in life. People with low self-esteem are always on the sidelines waiting for the perfect moment to jump in. Instead of letting life pass you by, have confidence in your success and take the risks necessary to succeed.

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12. They Don’t Gossip

People with low self-esteem are always in other peoples’ business – they’re more interested in what everyone else is doing than themselves. People with high self-esteem are more interested in their own business and stay out of others’ affairs.

Self-esteem is essential to success in life. People who have a high level of self-esteem believe in themselves and push themselves to succeed while those with low confidence feel a sense of entitlement. If you need a boost in your self-image, avoid making the mistakes of people with low self-esteem. You’ll be amazed at the difference it makes.

Featured photo credit: Superhero kid against school blackboard via shutterstock.com

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Last Updated on October 15, 2018

Why Helping Others Actually Helps Yourself

Why Helping Others Actually Helps Yourself

Helping others: it’s a fundamental part of humanity, bonding together and helping a fellow man or woman. In times of tragedy, the stories of those who help others are inspiring, such as helping the nation recover from national disasters and terrorist attacks. Some men and women even devote their lives to helping others, from the police force that protects our cities, to the fire departments who run into burning buildings, to the service men and women who risk their lives for the common good.

“No one has ever become poor by giving.” ― Anne Frank, diary of Anne Frank

But helping others isn’t limited to these grand gestures or times of tribulation. Helping others can be done each and every day. And contrary to what you may have heard, helping others doesn’t always have to be a selfless act. It’s important to understand that helping others can actually help yourself. No matter what the motivation, getting out and helping others is the key. So in that spirit of motivation, here are 5 reasons why helping others actually helps yourself.

1. Quid Pro Quo

When you help someone, they will be more likely to help you. This is the basic, unspoken agreement that fuels nearly every move. I’ll spend my entire day lugging boxes, but you owe me. It’s much easier to find help when someone knows you’d do the same for them. They may not always live up to their end of the bargin, and you may not either. But if you help enough people and do many good deeds, it will be given back when needed.

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2. Karma goes both ways.

All too often, the idea of Karma is described in a negative way. If you do bad, bad will come find you. But it works the other way too. When you are a good person and help people, good things seem to happen. And while you may not believe in an inter-connected universe that rewards good deeds, there is something to be said about how helping others changes your perspective. When you’re helping others, you will often feel better about yourself, increasing the likelihood that your next experience will be a positive one, rather than a negative one.

3. Doing good feels good.

It’s maybe the most cited benefit of doing good: you’ll feel great. Helping others is a great way to feel better about yourself. Seeing a smile or even tears of joy makes it all worth it. It’s as simple as that.

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4. Good publicity is the best publicity.

People notice when you’re doing good. It may not be the reason you help out, but someone is always watching. Even the simplest gesture can make an awesome impression.

When I was in college, I had a class that helped out at a school for a full day. I worked with a small group of high school students who were incredibly interested in writing, and I had a great time. I asked the teacher if I could come back on my own time and work with these students to finish this project we were working on, to which she agreed.

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I went two more times that week, thinking nothing more about it. Fast forward a few weeks: I received a letter in the mail stating I had been chosen as a Presidential Grant Recipient for the summer and received a $2,000 stipend to work with a group of students and professors on a research project over the summer. I was floored, as I hadn’t even applied. I was nominated by that teacher who appreciated the work I did with her students. It wasn’t expected, but helping others ended up opening a door I never would have known was even available.

5. Helping others looks good on a resume or application.

Is your resume looking a little thin? Does your college application need a bit of pizzaz? Volunteering your time and energy to help others makes your resume and applications look as good as it makes you feel. Hiring managers look favorably on volunteer work and many acceptance committees use it to separate similar candidates. So read to some first graders, volunteer at the homeless shelter, and volunteer at your local Boys and Girl Club. Your resume will thank you.

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Featured photo credit: xavi talleda via flickr.com

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