Advertising
Advertising

12 Steps To Building The Ideal Lifestyle

12 Steps To Building The Ideal Lifestyle

The ideal lifestyle is possible. Everyone can live the way they want… and in fact, they do. Because the way you live now, regardless of whether you like it or not, is what you chose to live like.

And you realize that mostly when you compare yourself to others, or when you do things you don’t want to do (the job you don’t like, different tasks and commitments). It’s when you see the bigger picture and understand this is not the way you want to live that you become aware of the fact that you can actually live better. So then you ask yourself: “What do I want my life to be like?” and “Who do I want to be in it?”.

And that itself is the first step towards your journey to the ideal lifestyle. It’s not about perfectionism, not at all. It’s about not having to work something we can’t stand, do things we don’t want, miss opportunities, lack time and sleep and so on.

It’s about enjoying life more, doing what you love, becoming someone you can be proud of, doing things for others and actually spending more time with your loved ones, creating things, giving and sharing… and simply being happy and contented with every day of your life.

1. Define the ideal lifestyle

For a start, ask yourself those two questions: “What do I want my life to be like?” and “Who do I want to be in it?”. Answer them in the best and most honest way possible, because this will be your definition of what you want in life and who you want to become, and will eventually become your reality after some time.

An important thing you don’t want to miss is accepting the idea that you need to become someone else in order to live another kind of lifestyle. Many people thing what could they improve in the outer world and tend to forget that many inner changes will happen too that are often more crucial. So be aware of that and embrace the qualities you need to build to become that person.

2. Eliminate the unnecessary

Without doing this, you can’t go any further. Because there are many things in your life right now that are preventing you from moving on. They may be people, thoughts, events, habits and so on. What you need to do is to eliminate them because they don’t have a place in your ideal lifestyle.

I don’t want to repeat myself (I’ve already written about it in a previous post), so here are the things that hold you back.

Advertising

3. Find what works best for you

Now that you have eliminated the unnecessary, you can make another step in your personal development. And this is the time to try and fail as much as possible. What I mean is, you need to find what works best for you. And the best way is to try as many different things as you can and preferably fail many times. Because there is no better teacher than experience and once you fail at something, you will know whether or not it’s for you and if it’s worth working on it.

Experiment with everything.

You will eventually find our which is the best sport for you, the foods that give you energy and boost your metabolism, the best time during the day for personal projects or working, the habits you need to establish, how you want to look, talk and behave and so on. You may decide that waking up at 5 a.m. is just not your things and although it’s connected with productivity and most successful people do it, you’re just more productive around lunch, or in the evening. So listen to your instincts in this case and do what’s best for you.

Test different sleep patterns, working hours, behavior, motivation strategies and so on. Find your thing and stick to it.

4. Build a few keystone habits

A keystone habit is a habit that provokes a chain of other activities that are good for you.

Getting up early for me is connected to a morning ritual with a healthy breakfast, a quick workout and a positive start of the day. This usually includes reading affirmations out loud and writing something. Going to the gym every day helps me stay on track. It’s followed by alternating hot and cold showers and staying motivated for the rest of the day. The earlier you build such habits, the better. Once you make them stick], everything else will improve too. So work on them now and concentrate on other things later.

Here are the best habits you can start implementing now:

  • working out;
  • meditating;
  • eating healthy;
  • getting up early;
  • planning your day from the night before;

They are proven to work wonders and it’s very important to stick to them no matter what. Just make them lifelong habits and do the certain thing even if you’re on a vacation, even after you’ve had a bad day, even when everything seems pointless.

Advertising

5. Find you passion

This can happen by listening to your inner voice, focusing on the things you enjoy doing, and trying new things.

The point is to not only find it, but also embrace it, get better in this things and make it an essential part of your daily life.

That will brings you such happiness, contentedness and purpose that you’ll never doubt it’s your thing.

6. Make it your job

Here things get a little harder as you’ll need to work on your passion as you’ve probably never worked before in your life. But the difference this time is that you’ll be doing something you love, so you can’t really call it working.

If you want to become a writer, write every single day, whenever you can. Try to improve your writing at the same time and find ways to promote your work.

If you are a gym freak, master your performance in the gym. Shape your body. Learn everything in this niche and get a certificate. Become a personal trainer and help others achieve the body you want. This way you’ll communicate only with people willing to improve themselves and will spend most of your days in the gym. Maybe open one of your own one day.

If the only thing you want is to become good in picking up girls, then practice that and master it. Read everything you can. It’s pure psychology so find out what you need to know about human behavior, how the brain works, confidence and so on. Practice it daily by talking to every girl you meet. Become overconfident and able to impress every girl you speak with. Then when you can consider yourself great in doing it, start teaching others how to do it. Make a blog, give ideas, train other shy guys how to get out there. Make videos, share advice. Speak in the 21 Convention one day.

I gave 3 totally random examples because I wanted to show you how absolutely everything in this world can be mastered and turned into something prosperous. Once you find what your passion is, work hard on it, dedicate time, energy and effort, believe in it every single day, you’ll manage to make it your job.

Advertising

And this will be a dream job. One that perfectly suits an ideal lifestyle.

7. Decide what time you want to spend working

Arrange things in such a way that you’ll be able to work every second week, a few hours each day, or 4 days in a week. It could be anything.

But this, of course, will be after you’ve worked hard enough and long enough (a year or so) and have turned what you love into a business.

8. Travel often

Traveling is one of the best things you can do in life. It’s important to make it something you’ll do at least once or twice a year. Preferably every 2-3 months. Most people usually travel to get out of reality and forget about their problems. But you’ve build such a lifestyle that has a great reality and you don’t want escape from it. Traveling is just because you don’t want to get stuck, to miss out on the beautiful things the world has to offer. You will refind yourself too while doing it, learn a lot about other cultures and see the beauty of life.

This way your life will never be sedentary and you’ll never get bored.

9. Have hobbies

Find out other things you enjoy doing and dedicate time to them every now and then.

10. Be always on the go

Never miss an opportunity to learn something new. No matter who you are now and what your income is, you always have what to learn.

Don’t neglect your spiritual and mental world. Meditate, read good books and find inspiration.

Advertising

11. Always be open for new things

Try to do something new and something you fear a few times a month.

It may be approaching strangers, bungee jumping, public speaking, dancing, visiting new countries, trying new sports, etc.

Each of them will be an amazing experience and will make your life even more exciting.

12. Give and be grateful

Giving is the best investment and can make you way more contented than buying new stuff. So be able to give as much as you can, be it advice, help, encouragement, money, stuff you don’t use and need.  Volunteer or give for charity. Also never forget to be grateful. Each step of this journey should go along with appreciation. Everything you have, even when it’s not more, is amazing and a big reason to feel deeply grateful. Express that feeling everyday towards the things, people, events and stuff in your life.

You see, building the ideal lifestyle may take some time, but it’s not impossible. Actually anyone can have it. They just need a burning desire to achieve all that, willingness to sacrifice, patience and a strong belief.

Eventually, they’ll understand it’s all worth it. And enjoying the journey is one of the things that make the ideal lifestyle such a sweet experience.

Featured photo credit: Slow, Mikael Tigerström via flickr.com

More by this author

Lidiya K

Lidiya is the founder of Let's Reach Success, a blog on personal, spiritual and business growth.

How To Live a Good Life By Making These 8 Choices 6 Quick Things You Can Do Right Now to Declutter Your Life 6 Quick Things You Can Do Right Now to Declutter Your Life 30 Thoughts to Keep You Positive Why Becoming Self-Employed is The Answer Beating the Flu – How Not to Get Sick

Trending in Communication

1 What Makes a Good Leader: 9 Critical Leadership Qualities 2 Think Positive Mantras Help a Lot? Try Value Affirmation Instead 3 How to Survive a Midlife Crisis (The Definitive Guide for Men) 4 How to Live Life to the Fullest 5 5 Tips To Stay Positive In Negative Situations

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising
Advertising

Last Updated on May 22, 2020

What Makes a Good Leader: 9 Critical Leadership Qualities

What Makes a Good Leader: 9 Critical Leadership Qualities

The word “leader” makes you think of people in charge, high-ranking people: your boss, politicians, presidents, CEOs…

But leadership really isn’t about a particular position or a person’s seniority. Just because someone has worked for many years doesn’t mean s/he has gained the qualities and skills to lead a team.

Getting promoted to a managerial position doesn’t automatically turn you into a leader either. CEOs and other high-ranking officials don’t always have great leadership skills.

So what makes a good leader? What are the characteristics of a leader?

Good leadership is about acquiring and honing specific skills. Leadership skills enable you to be a role model for a team in any environment. With great leadership qualities, successful leaders come in all shapes and sizes: in the home, at school, or in the workplace.

The following are some of the many characteristics great leaders exhibit.

1. A Positive Attitude

Great leaders know that they won’t have a happy and motivated team unless they themselves exhibit a positive attitude. This can be done by remaining positive when things go wrong and by creating a relaxed and happy atmosphere in the workplace.

Even some simple things like providing snacks or organizing a team Happy Hour can make a world of difference. An added perk is that team members are likely to work harder and do overtime when needed if they’re happy and appreciated.

Even in the worst situations, such as experiencing low team morale or team members having made a big mistake at work, a great leader stays positive and figures out ways to keep the team motivated to solve the problems.

Walt Disney had his share of hardships and challenges, and like any great leader, he managed to stay positive and find new opportunities. In 1928, Disney found that his film producer, Charles Mintz, wanted to reduce his payments for the Oswald series. Mintz threatened to cut ties entirely if Disney didn’t accept his terms, and Disney chose to part ways. But in leaving Oswald, Disney decided to create something new: the iconic Mickey Mouse[1].

The key is to break down huge challenges into smaller ones and find ways to tackle them one by one.

Advertising

Think about the lessons you can learn from the mistake and jot them down because sometimes you win, and sometimes you learn.

2. Confidence

All great leaders have to exhibit an air of confidence if they’re going to succeed. Please don’t confuse this with self-satisfaction and arrogance. You want people to look up to you for inspiration, not so they can punch you in the face.

Confidence is important because people will be looking to you on how to behave, particularly if things aren’t going 100% right. If you remain calm and poised, team members are far more likely to as well. As a result, morale and productivity will remain high, and the problem will be solved more quickly.

If you panic and give up, they will know immediately and things will simply go downhill from there.

Elon Musk is a great example of a leader with confidence. He truly believes that Tesla will be successful, which he has shown many times through his actions. He converted 532,000 stock options at $6.63 each, their value on Dec. 4, 2009, before Tesla went public. It was a hefty bargain considering Tesla’s stock price stood at around $195 per share at that time. He doesn’t apologize for his beliefs and has drawn fire from just about everyone for his political actions.

You can’t instantly become a very confident person, but all the small things you do every day will gradually make you more confident:

  • List 5 things you like about yourself every day (something different every day), and you’ll appreciate yourself more.
  • Work on your strengths and do your best to enhance them.

3. A Sense of Humor

It’s imperative for any kind of leader to have a sense of humor, particularly when things go wrong. And they will.

Your team members are going to be looking to you for how to react in a seemingly dire situation. It would probably be best if you weren’t stringing up a noose for yourself in the corner. You need to be able to laugh things off because if staff morale goes down, so will productivity.

Establish this environment prior to any kind of meltdown by encouraging humor and personal discussions in the workplace.

As a president, Barack Obama exuded confidence and calm during stressful situations. But he was also known for his “dad jokes,”[2] his genuinely funny speeches at the White House Correspondents’ Dinner, and appearing on Zack Galifianakis’s Between Two Ferns.[3] Obama’s sense of humor made him grounded, realistic, and honest, which no doubt helped during some tense moments in the White House!

Learn to laugh at yourself. Confident people laugh about their own silly mistakes, and when you do this, others will also trust you more because you’re willing to share your experiences.

Advertising

Be observant and learn from the jokes others make. You can also get a lot of inspiration from the internet.

4. Ability to Embrace Failure

No matter how hard you try to avoid it, failures will happen; that’s okay. You just need to know how to deal with them.

Great leaders take them in strides. They remain calm and logically think through the situation and utilize their resources. What they don’t do is fall apart and reveal to their team how worried they are, which leads to negative morale, fear, and binge-drinking under desks.

Great leaders do, in fact, lead, even when they’re faced with setbacks.

Henry Ford experienced a major setback after designing and improving the Ford Quadricycle. He founded the Detroit Automobile Company in 1899, but the resulting cars they produced did not live up to his standards and were too expensive. The company dissolved in 1901. Ford took this in stride and formed the Henry Ford Company. The sales were slow and the company had financial problems; it wasn’t until 1903 that the Ford Motor Company was successful and put the Ford on the map.

Get to the root cause of any problem so you can prevent it from happening again and learn from the mistake.

By asking “why” 5 times (or more) on why something happened, you can find out the key factor that caused the problem and can find the best solution to tackle the problem.

You’ll also learn how to prevent this from happening again in the future after finding out a problem’s root cause.

5. Careful Listening and Feedback

This is far more complex than it actually sounds. Good communication skills are essential for a great leader. You may very well understand the cave of crazy that is your brain, but that doesn’t mean that you can adequately take the ideas out of it and explain them to someone else.

The best leaders need to be able to communicate clearly with the people around them. They also need to be able to interpret other people properly and not take what they say personally.

The Dalai Lama, as a symbol of the unification of the state of Tibet, represents and practices Buddhist values. The Dalai Lama’s leadership is benevolent and aims toward truth and understanding, alongside the other Buddhist precepts. This is a great example for all leaders: if you want to give good directions to others, you have to get feedback from others to understand the situation properly.

Advertising

Encourage communication between team members and establish an open door policy.

Practice not interrupting team members when they’re talking. Instead, summarize what they say and ask for feedback after you have talked about your ideas.

6. Knowing How and When to Delegate

No matter how much you might want to, you can’t actually do everything yourself. Even if you could, in a team environment that would be a terrible idea anyway.

Good leaders recognize that delegation does more than simply alleviate their own stress levels (although that’s obviously a nice perk). Delegating to others shows that you have confidence in their abilities, which subsequently results in higher morale in the workplace, as well as loyalty from your staff. They want to feel appreciated and trusted.

Although Steve Jobs was known for focusing in on the smallest of details, he knew how to delegate. By finding, cultivating, and trusting capable team members, Jobs was able to make Apple run smoothly, even when he had to be absent for extended periods of time.

To know when and how to delegate work to team members, you have to be very familiar with each of them:

  • List out all of their strengths, weaknesses, and personalities.
  • Talk with your team members more to know about their passion and interests.

Take a look at this guide and learn more about delegation: How to Delegate Work Effectively (The Definitive Guide for Leaders)

7. Growth Mindset

Any good leader knows how important it is to develop the skills of those around them. The best can recognize those skills early on. Not only will development make work easier as they improve and grow, it will also foster morale. In addition, they may develop some skills that you don’t possess that will be beneficial to the workplace.

Great leaders share their knowledge with the team and give them the opportunity to achieve. This is how leaders gain their respect and loyalty.

Pope Francis has been unusually popular with many Catholics and many non-Catholics. His position isn’t totally traditional, which is part of his appeal, but he also has admirable leadership skills. Pope Francis’s TED talk[4] drew attention because he encouraged leaders to be humble and to demonstrate solidarity with others. This inclusive, kind, and respectful style of leadership is incredibly important for any situation.

It’s important to spend time talking with other team members individually to understand them.

Advertising

Find out team members’ current challenges and try to give feedback and encouragement so they will grow and do better.

8. Responsibility

Great leaders know that when it comes to their company, work place or whatever situation they’re in, they need to take personal responsibility for failure. How can they expect employees to hold themselves accountable if they themselves don’t?

The best leaders don’t make excuses; they take the blame and then work out how to fix the problem as soon as possible. This proves that they’re trustworthy and possess integrity.

Howard Gillman is the chancellor of UC Irvine. You might have heard of how the university rescinded a bunch of acceptances, and then changed its mind[5], This past spring, an unusually high number of accepted students decided to matriculate; the school initially responded by rescinding offers over things like missed deadlines. But the college realized this was a mistake and reversed its decision. Gillman and the university accepted responsibility and decided to move past their earlier bad decision.

Always ask yourself what you can do better or what you should change. Take responsibility and think about what you can do better to prevent this from happening next time.

9. A Desire to Learn

It’s safe to say that all great leaders will have to enter unchartered waters at some point during their career. Because of this, they have to be able to trust their intuition and draw on past experiences to guide them.

Great leaders know that there’s always something to learn from everything they have experienced before. They are able to connect the present challenges with the lessons learned in the past to make decisions and take actions promptly.

You can either recall what you’ve learned from your memories or search your notes (ideally, a software that you can access anywhere with things well-organized).

Warren Buffett, one of the richest people in the world, has mostly made the right calls. But in dealing with huge amounts of money, Buffett has also made several multi-million (and sometimes multi-billion) dollar mistakes. He has stated that buying the company Berkshire Hathaway was his biggest mistake[6]. From that poor choice, he realized that it was unwise to pursue “improvements” and “expansions” in the existing textile industry. Despite mistakes like this, Buffett has invested wisely, and it shows.

To effectively learn from the past, write down lessons you’ve learned from any mistakes you’ve made. Have all the lessons well organized, and when similar things happen again in future, take these lessons as references.

The Bottom Line

Leadership traits are learnable. If you practice consistently, you can be a great leader, too.

Make small changes to your habits when you work with your team, wherever that may be. Most of us aren’t presidents or CEOs, but we all work with other people, and our actions always impact others. This gives every person the chance to develop leadership skills and to stand out from the crowd.

More Tips on Leadership

Featured photo credit: Markus Spiske via unsplash.com

Reference

Read Next