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T.H.U.M.P. – 5 Ways to Deal with Irresponsible People

T.H.U.M.P. – 5 Ways to Deal with Irresponsible People
class="bigphoto">Irresponsible People

Yep, we’ve all been there. Whether it’s a co-worker, a family member, or even a close friend, we’ve all had to deal with people whose stark irresponsibility causes anger, annoyance, and even chaos everywhere they go.

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These individuals are constantly late, they don’t follow instructions, they miss appointments, they forget to call, they make drastically uninformed decisions, and they just generally create negativity and angst for the rest of us.

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Here are five great ways for dealing with these annoying people, and the very appropriate acronym to help you remember these tips is T.H.U.M.P!

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  • Tell them – Believe it or not, many people who are chronically irresponsible don’t realize the depth of the chaos that they leave in their wake. It’s not up to us to teach and train the masses about how to be responsible members of society, but that doesn’t mean we can’t point out that they have caused a problem due to their irresponsible behavior. If they get upset about it, that is probably because they know that you’re right, and no one likes to face the fact that they screwed up.
  • Have a back up plan – Despite your best efforts to tell certain people about their less than savory personality traits, some people are just going to be irresponsible no matter what you do. Your only recourse then is to have a plan in place for whenever they live up to your expectations of them. Whenever you are involved in any dealings with these people, you can think positive about the outcome – and maybe that will come to pass – but you should also plan for that person to drop the ball. By having a back up plan in place long before this person has a chance to cause an issue, you’ll save yourself and everyone involved a lot of headaches.
  • Undermine their involvement – Sometimes the best defense is a smashing offense! If your favorite irresponsible person is going to cause problems despite your best efforts, simply remove them from the equation. Make plans without telling them. Fill their normal slot in your endeavors with someone else before they get a chance to get involved. Keep a tight lid on the details about your upcoming adventures. Even if the irresponsible person finds out, that doesn’t mean that you need to suddenly gush about all of the details, thus allowing them to possibly slip in at the last minute.
  • Make them an offer – When all else fails, turn to bribery! If you can’t advise the person, prepare for their chaos, or otherwise avoid their involvement, then make them an offer that they can’t refuse. Dangle a big carrot in front of their face, and promise them a rich reward if they manage to be a part of whatever you are planning without making a mess of it. Be sure your “carrot” is something that really appeals to them, even if that appeal is simply to their vanity or to their misguided perceptions.
  • Prepare yourself mentally – The final way of dealing with irresponsible people is to simply expect them to be that way. This isn’t to say that you should run around thinking the worst of people. However, there are some people who are going to do what they are going to do, no matter how many problems it causes for other people. If they are going to do their thing regardless of your efforts to the contrary, then the best thing that you can do is to just be ready for it on a mental level. Even chaos, anarchy, and negativity aren’t as bad if we are ready for them. Often, just being ready for something will limit the negative effect that it has on us.

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Last Updated on September 12, 2019

12 Things You Should Remember When Feeling Lost in Life

12 Things You Should Remember When Feeling Lost in Life

Even the most charismatic people you know, whether in person or celebrities of some sort, experience days where they feel lost in life and isolated from everyone else.

While it’s good to know we aren’t alone in this feeling, the question still remains:

What should we do when we feel lost and lonely?

Here are 12 things to remember:

1. Recognize That It’s Okay!

The truth is, there are times you need to be alone. If you’ve always been accustomed to being in contact with people, this may prove difficult.

However, learning how to be alone and comfortable in your own skin will give you confidence and a sense of self reliance.

We cheat ourselves out of the opportunity to become self reliant when we look for constant companionship.

Learn how to embrace your me time: What Your Fear of Being Alone Is Really About and How to Get over It

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2. Use Your Lost and Loneliness as a Self-Directing Guide

You’ve most likely heard the expression: “You have to know where you’ve been to know where you’re going.”

Loneliness also serves as a life signal to indicate you’re in search of something. It’s when we’re in the midst of solitude that answers come from true soul searching.

Remember, there is more to life than what you’re feeling.

3. Realize Loneliness Helps You Face the Truth

Being in the constant company of others, although comforting sometimes, can often serve as a distraction when we need to face the reality of a situation.

Solitude cuts straight to the chase and forces you to deal with the problem at hand. See it as a blessing that can serve as a catalyst to set things right!

4. Be Aware That You Have More Control Than You Think

Typically, when we see ourselves as being lost or lonely, it gives us an excuse to view everything we come in contact with in a negative light. It lends itself to putting ourselves in the victim mode, when the truth of the matter is that you choose your attitude in every situation.

No one can force a feeling upon you! It is YOU who has the ultimate say as to how you choose to react.

5. Embrace the Freedom That the Feeling of Being Alone Can Offer

Instead of wallowing in self pity, which many are prone to do because of loneliness, try looking at your circumstance as a new-found freedom.

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Most people are in constant need of approval of their viewpoints. Try enjoying the fact that  you don’t need everyone you care about to support your decisions.

6. Acknowledge the Person You Are Now

Perhaps you feel a sense of loneliness and confusion because your life circumstances have taken you away from the persona that others know to be you.

Perhaps the new you differs radically from the old. Realize that life is about change and how we react to that change. It’s okay that you’re not who you used to be.

Take a look at this article and learn to accept your imperfect self: Accept Yourself (Flaws and All): 7 Benefits of Being Vulnerable

7. Keep Striving to Do Your Best

Often those who are feeling isolated and unto themselves will develop a defeatist attitude. They’ll do substandard work because their self esteem is low and they don’t care.

Never let this feeling take away your sense of worth! Do your best always and when you come through this dark time, others will admire how you stayed determined in spite of the obstacles you had to overcome.

And to live your best life, you must do this ONE thing: step out of your comfort zone.

8. Don’t Forget That Time Is Precious

When we’re lost in a sea of loneliness and depression, it’s all too easy to reflect on regrets of past life events. This does nothing but feed negativity and perpetuate the situation.

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Instead of falling prey to this common pitfall, put one foot in front of the other and acknowledge every positive step you take. By doing this, you can celebrate the struggles you overcome at the end of the day.

9. Remember, Things Happen for a Reason

Every circumstance we encounter in our life is designed to teach us and that lesson is in turn passed on to others.

Sometimes we’re fortunate enough to figure out the lesson to be learned, while other times, we simply need to have faith that if the lesson wasn’t meant directly for us to learn from, how we handled it was observed by someone who needed to learn.

Your solitude and feeling of lost, in this instance, although painful possibly, may be teaching someone else.

10. Journal During This Time

Record your thoughts when you’re at the height of loneliness and feeling lost. You’ll be amazed when you reflect back at how you viewed things at the time and how far you’ve come later.

This time (if recorded) can give you a keen insight into who you are and what makes you feel the way you feel.

11. Remember You Aren’t the First to Feel This Way

It’s quite common to feel as if we’re alone and no one else has ever felt this way before. We think this because at the time of our distress, we’re silently observing others around us who are seemingly fine in every way.

The truth is, we can’t possibly know the struggles of those around us unless they elect to share them. We ALL have known this pain!

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Try confiding in someone you trust and ask them how they deal with these feelings when they experienced it. You may be surprised at what you learn.

12. Ask for Help If the Problem Persists

The feeling of being lost and lonely is common to everyone, but typically it will last for a relatively short period of time.

Most people will confess to, at one time or another, being in a “funk.” But if the problem persists longer than you feel it should, don’t ignore it.

When your ability to reason and consider things rationally becomes impaired, do not poo poo the problem away and think it isn’t worthy of attention. Seek medical help.

Afraid to ask for help? Here’s how to change your outlook to aim high!

Final Thoughts

Loneliness and a sense of feeling lost can in many ways be extremely painful and difficult to deal with at best. However, these feelings can also serve as a catalyst for change in our lives if we acknowledge them and act.

Above anything, cherish your mental well being and don’t underestimate its worth. Seek professional guidance if you’re unable to distinguish between a sense of freedom for yourself and a sense of despair.

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Featured photo credit: Andrew Neel via unsplash.com

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