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Do This One Thing To Comfort Your Overwhelming Negativity

Do This One Thing To Comfort Your Overwhelming Negativity

We all know that feeling when you have a problem in your life and nothing seems like you can solve it. Whether you’ve tried something a million times and it isn’t working, or you’ve even tried just once, the negative voices in your mind can shoot you down and sabotage your success. Basically, you feel awful. It may feel strange, but perhaps you should try the following suggestions.

Talk to yourself and face your very deep and true self

Yes, really, talking to yourself can have real positive effects on your life and help you to get out of that cycle of negativity (maybe just make sure there’s no one around while you’re trying this out).

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As well as hearing new messages you hadn’t heard before from others, talking to yourself gives you time to listen to yourself – really listen. How often do we take the time to do that? This is important, because we don’t get the best out of life until we are fully connected to ourselves.

This might feel strange and even a little scary at first, if you’re not used to it. An easy way to find out what is going on for you is to start by asking yourself, “What do I need right now?” or “Hello me, what’s up?”

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Hearing that answer can get you connected to yourself in a wonderful way, and the more connected we are, the more we know how to be in the world, and what our next move should be.

If you are really wound up about something and need a way of letting go, you could try talking non-stop to yourself. Just let the words flow until you feel something shift. In the book, The Valkyries[1] by Paolo Coehlo, this talking to yourself without thinking is called channeling. It is a way of getting in touch with yourself, and, for the more religious of you, the universe, God, or whatever.

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Either way, it’s a good stress release. It allows you to shift the negative energy cycle you’ve got going on so you can begin focusing on what you actually want to be doing.

Repetition of mantras can also be a great way of resetting your head space if you had a bad start to your day or something unexpected threw you off course.

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Talk to others in your head

When talking to others in our head, we basically end up using the linguistic part of our brains, as well as the interactive part of our brains that we would use if someone were actually there. This shows how powerful this practice can be, as there has been a long history of people in times of great difficulty hearing a little voice of advice in their darkest hour.[2]

This sometimes can occur naturally when asking yourself a question (as we see in Eat, Pray, Love), or something that you can begin to consciously practice in order to find the answers you need.

If there is a friend in your life that can help you with a problem, imagine having them by your side. I have a friend who is very wise, and when I am unsure of something, I will ask myself, “what would he do? What would he tell me?” Of course you can really call these people who are close to you, and feel them rooting for you. Hear their advice. This advice may well be your own inner knowing that you couldn’t hear underneath all of the negative chatter.  The answer I hear back is always right.

So there you have it. I hope that this little tip will help you to get some clarity in your life. Hearing what you have to say is the first step to knowing what you have to say is of importance. From there, you can find your way to the next best step to take for you, and then the next, without struggling and trying so hard or swimming against the stream. Find out what’s really going on behind all this negativity and you will have the key to your future.

Reference

[1] Paolo Coehlo: The Valkyries 
[2] The New Yorker: The Voices In Our Head

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Daniel Owen van Dommelen

Coder, Director, Writer, Human

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Last Updated on July 18, 2019

What Makes People Happy? 20 Secrets of “Always Happy” People

What Makes People Happy? 20 Secrets of “Always Happy” People

Some people just seem to float through life with a relentless sense of happiness – through the toughest of times, they’re unfazed and aloof, stopping to smell the roses and drinking out of a glass half full.

They may not have much to be happy about, but the simplicity behind that fact itself may make them happy.

It’s all a matter of perspective, conscious effort and self-awareness. Listed below are a number of reasons why some people are always happy.

1. They Manage Their Expectations

They’re not crushed when they don’t get what they want – or misled into expecting to get the most out of every situation. They approach every situation pragmatically, hoping for the best but being prepared for the worst.

2. They Don’t Set Unrealistic Standards

Similar to the last point, they don’t live their lives in a constant pursuit towards impossible visions of perfection, only to always find themselves falling short of what they want.

3. They Don’t Take Anything for Granted

Happiness rests with feeling fulfilled – those who fail to stop and appreciate what they have every now and again will never experience true fulfillment.

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4. They’re Not Materialistic

There are arguing viewpoints on whether or not money can really buy happiness; if it can, then we know from experience that we can never be satisfied because there will always be something newer or better that we want. Who has ever had enough money?

5. They Don’t Dwell

They don’t sweat the small things or waste time worrying about things that don’t really matter at the end of the day. They don’t let negative thoughts latch onto them and drain them or distract them. Life’s too short to worry.

6. They Care About Themselves First

They’re independent, care for themselves and understand that they must put their needs first in order to accommodate the needs of others.

They indulge, aim to get what they want, make time for themselves and are extremely self-reliant.

7. They Enjoy the Little Things

They stop to smell the roses. They’re accustomed to find serenity when it’s available, to welcome entertainment or a stimulating discussion with a stranger when it crosses their path. They don’t overlook the small things in life that can be just as important.

8. They Can Adapt

They’re not afraid of change and they work to make the most out of new circumstances, good or bad. They thrive under pressure, are not overwhelmed easily and always embrace a change of pace.

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9. They Experiment

They try new things, experience new flavors and never shy away from something they have yet to experience. They never order twice from the same menu.

10. They Take Their Time

They don’t unnecessarily rush through life. They work on their own schedule to the extent that they can and maneuver through life at their own relaxing pace.

11. They Employ Different Perspectives

They’re not stuck in one perspective; a loss can result in a new opportunity, hitting rock bottom can mean that there’s no where to go but up.

12. They Seek to Learn

Their constant pursuit of knowledge keeps them inspired and interested in life. They cherish information and are on a life-long quest to learn as much as they can.

13. They Always Have a Plan

They don’t find themselves drifting without purpose. When something doesn’t go as planned, they have a plan for every letter in the alphabet to fall back on.

14. They Give Respect to Get It

They are respectful and, in turn, are seen as respectable; the respect they exude earns them the respect they deserve.

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15. They Consider Every Opportunity

They always have their eyes open for a new road, a new avenue worth exploring. They know how to recognize opportune moments and pounce on them to make the most of every situation. Success is inevitable for them.

16. They Always Seek to Improve

Perpetual self-improvement is the key towards their ongoing thirst for success. Whatever it is they do, they take pride in getting better and better, from social interactions to mundane tasks. Their pursuit at being the best eventually materializes.

17. They Don’t Take Life Too Seriously

They’re not ones to get offended easily over-analyze or complicate matters. They laugh at their own faults and misfortunes.

18. They Live in the Moment

They don’t live for tomorrow or dwell on what may have happened yesterday. Every day is a new opportunity, a new chapter. They live in the now, and in doing so, get the most out of every moment.

You can learn how to do so too: How to Live in the Moment and Stop Worrying About the Past or Future

19. They Say Yes

Much more often than they say no. They don’t have to be badgered to go out, don’t shy away from new opportunities or anything that may seem inconvenient.

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20. They’re Self-Aware

Most important, they’re wholly aware of themselves. They self-reflect and are conscious of their states of mind. If somethings bothering them, they fix it.

We’re all susceptible to feeling down every now and again, but we are all equipped with the necessary solutions that just have to be discovered.

Lack of confidence, inability to feel fulfilled, and susceptibility to stress are all matters that can be controlled through the way we handle our lives and perceive our circumstances.

Learn about How Self-Reflection Gives You a Happier and More Successful Life.

Final Thoughts

The main philosophy employed by the happiest includes the idea that life’s simply too short: life’s too short to let things get you down, to take things for granted, to pursue absolute and unrealistic perfection.

For some, employing these characteristics is a second nature – they do it without knowing. For others, a conscious effort must be put forth every now and again. Self-Awareness is key.

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Featured photo credit: Charles Postiaux via unsplash.com

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