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Why People Don’t Have To Like You And Why You Don’t Have To Care

Why People Don’t Have To Like You And Why You Don’t Have To Care

We all want to heal the world and make it a better place. And it is vital. However, before you begin to attempt launching on the world stage and getting involved in the lives of family, friends, and, in a few cases, people you do not even know, put a spotlight on yourself.

Are you feeling drained and exhausted with everyone needing or wanting something from you? Our boundaries are mixed when we float on sensitive and caring bubbles.The toxic bubbles start bursting those bubbles. Even if we convince ourselves that is it beneficial, red lights will appear and all comes to a halt. You feel like no one cares when you are the one that really has an issue.

Do for Yourself As You Do Unto Others

Now everybody needs to be liked, but remember that you can easily slip into this mission the wrong way. You first need to focus on liking yourself before getting others to like you. You bend over backwards for other people all the time, and yes, they may like all you do for them. But ask yourself, do you actually like you? With more inner stability, you become less of an emotional roller coaster.

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Change your negativity; control your emotions and your feelings. Happiness does not depend on external factors. It links directly to your sense of contentment. It is possible and easy to be happy by just being yourself. You need to accept who you are to grow. Your mind cannot simply be logged into. People cannot just explore how you feel and how you are doing, they can just assume it.

We are constantly bogged down with the needs of others. Our time, energy, and space leaves no personal productivity. A crucial way forward is learning the gentle art of saying no. It is great to get compliments from others, but if you rely on validation of how good you are from others, you can easily plunge into an emotional roller coaster. When you appreciate yourself, you do not go out of your way unnecessarily and people start to like the real you. There is a lack of genuineness in your gestures if you camouflage yourself according to different strokes for the different folks you’re surrounded by to fit in.

Healing the Scars of Sacrifice

When you are too busy focusing on the needs of everybody else around you, like your spouse, your children, and your friends, you give little thought to yourself and your own needs. The noble tunes of self-sacrifice has a soul rhythm does it not? We are taught, instilled with, and ingrained with doing for others before ourselves.

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Have you noticed that people who self-sacrifice the most always get the short end of the stick when they do decide to do something for themselves and go out and play? They become the substitute and standby players. And the ones who seem the most selfish end up in top ranks. Question that. You have been taught that it is selfish to think about you. It may be desirable putting your loved ones before you, but withholding your own needs will be a backslide for you. It is affirming to the world that you do not matter.

Now, let us examine what emotional needs really are. If you are not clear about your emotional needs to yourself, you are not clear to others. To thrive in the life game, you need to resolve conflicts, be aware of emotional needs, and ensure you get them met.

All around, you take the support you provide for granted, while you perceive your own needs as self-absorbed. If you do not value your needs, nobody can value them. People treat us in the way we demand to be treated. If we treat ourselves as if we have no value, others will treat us that way excessively. And then we get frustrated when we get no respect. Others treat you with no regards for your own needs because ultimately, you do not have regard for yourself.

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The Plan of Action

Do this exercise: picture yourself in a happy personal or business relationship. How would you ideally be treated in that picture? Would they linger around you all the time or give you your own space? Write down in detail what the perfect relationship would entail.

Now, break down the written details with your own needs. An example you may note is that the person of your dreams allows you personal space, meaning that your emotional needs include personal space and someone with other interests that will not smother yours.

What are your needs? Make a note of them:

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  • List your main priorities in the current stage.
  • Examine your key values and if you are living a life aligned with them.
  • What are your immediate goals? What are your goals for the year ahead?
  • How do you prefer spending your time?
  • What is an activity or project that you would like to start?

Ask yourself, what do you get from being the savior and the rescuer to everyone around you or getting caught up in the life maze and dramas of others? If you are too focused on everybody else, what can you do for your own life? In fact, by not helping others, you help them move forward. People need to make their own decisions and find their own solutions and, when you do this for them, you are not really helping them. If you take a step back and get to you know yourself, meeting your own needs will make you happy. And if everyone did this, the world will be a much better place.

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Nena Tenacity

Nena is passionate about writing. She shares her everyday health and lifestyle tips on Lifehack.

Here Are 30+ Easy High Fibre Breakfast Ideas You Can Try At Home A Wholesome Diet Is What You Need to Gain Happiness: 30 Natural Low-Carb Foods 10 Best Healthy Snacks That Even Gym People Eat When They’re Hungry! Want A Quick Yet Healthy Breakfast? Avocado Toast Is Your New Breakfast Idea Want To Look Younger And Be Healthier? Acai Berry Is Your New Breakfast Idea!

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Last Updated on July 15, 2019

41 Beautiful Pictures That Show What True Love Is All About

41 Beautiful Pictures That Show What True Love Is All About

Some things in life are hard to describe, yet we can recognize them when we see them.

Love is one of those things.

True love comes in many different forms, but here are some that many of us know well.

True love means supporting those who can’t support themselves

supportive couple

    A young man comforts his date in Times Square, New York City. Image by mbtrama

    strong hug

      A young man holds his significant other close to him. Image by Brad Fults

      running help

        A young track competitor helps one of her injured opponents over the finish line. Image from ViralNova.com

        feeding kitten

          A soldier in the Korean War takes time to feed a baby kitten. Image from US Naval Insititute

          It’s having the perfect selfie partner

          mom and daughter selfie

            A mother and her daughter take a selfie together. Image by Andrew Fysh

            girlfriends

              Two young girls pose for the camera. Image by Rolands Lakis

              selfies

                A happy couple takes a picture together. Image by Kayla Heineman

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                selfie

                  Two best friends take a selfie together. Image by Jason Wahido

                  dude selfie

                    Friends take a selfie together. Image by Glenn Scofield Williams

                    It’s all the warm fuzzies

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                      A young man spends time with his dog on a beach. Image by Magdalena Roeseler

                      DSC06952

                        A pet owner hugs his dog while on a day trip in San Francisco. Image by Taro the Shiba Inu

                        It means having a friend to photobomb you

                        photobomb

                          A boy makes a funny face as he poses for a picture with his brother. Image by Michael Bentley

                          old man photobomb

                            A man photobombs his wife while their grandson snaps a picture. Image by Frank

                            family photobomb

                              Family members photobomb their relatives’ Thanksgiving day family photo. Image by Beth Scupham

                              boyfriend photobomb

                                A friend photobombs the photographer and their friend, the woman in the foreground of this photo. Image by Lachlan Hardy

                                True love means being there even when life gets unbearably hard

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                                shoulder to cry on

                                  A family watches the Vermont National Guard depart for Afghanistan. Image by The U.S. Army

                                  flood dog

                                    During a monsoon in the Philippines, a boy carries his dog to safety. Image by Romeo Ranoco

                                    A woman is rescued from flood waters by a resident standing on top of her car during heavy rain in Chalandri suburb north of Athens

                                      A man helps a woman out of her vehicle during a flood in Chalandri, Greece. Image by John Kolesidis

                                      lunch

                                        A woman has lunch with her husband every day, even after he’s passed away. Image from ViralNova.com

                                        hug

                                          A woman hugs the mother of 6-year-old Noah Ponzer, who was one of the victims of the Sandy Hook shootings. Image by Spencer Platt

                                          rubble

                                            An Oklahoma couple pauses while trying to salvage belongings from a family member’s home after a tornado. Image by Adrees Latif

                                            sister and brother

                                              A girl puts her arm around her little brother as they wait outside of Sandy Hook Elementary after gunshots are fired. Image by Reuters.

                                              headstone

                                                A woman sits at her husband’s grave the day before their wedding anniversary. Image from NBC news

                                                It means taking the time for long goodbyes

                                                110321-N-BT887-100

                                                  A man says goodbye to his son before deploying. Image by Official U.S. Navy Page

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                                                  national guard goodbye

                                                    A South Carolina man says goodbye to his son before deploying for Afghanistan. Image by The National Guard

                                                    saying goodbye

                                                      A Sergeant hugs both of his sons before being deployed to Afghanistan. Image by The National Guard

                                                      And cherishing reunions

                                                      husband home

                                                        A woman hugs her husband as she sees him for the first time since his deployment to Iraq. Image by The U.S. Army

                                                        boyfriend home

                                                          A young  woman hugs her significant other as he returns home for Kuwait. Image by The National Guard

                                                          mother hug

                                                            A mother drops to her knees as she hugs her son on her return home from the Persian Gulf. Image by The National Guard

                                                            True love is letting yourself feel young when they’re around

                                                            elderly women

                                                              Two friends on their smartphones. Image by Robert Neff

                                                              feeling young

                                                                A young couple getting their picture taken. Image by db Photograph

                                                                sprinkler dad

                                                                  A father plays in a sprinkler with his daughter at Millennium Park in Chicago. Image by Ben Forsberg

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                                                                  subway couple

                                                                    A young couple on a subway enjoys sharing time together, while the girlfriend’s father sneaks a photo of them. Image by Gareth Williams

                                                                    wheelchairs

                                                                      A couple holds hands on a fall day. Image by David Amsler

                                                                      It’s letting yourself be silly… just because they’ll enjoy it

                                                                      silly faces

                                                                        A grandfather makes faces at the camera with his granddaughters. Image by Tim Pierce

                                                                        vote for pedro

                                                                          A woman’s father wears a Napoleon Dynamite t-shirt to make his daughter laugh. Image by emdot

                                                                          True love is allowing yourself to show how you really feel

                                                                          date night

                                                                            A young couple kisses in the back of a restaurant in Washington, D.C. Image by Derek Key

                                                                            playing violin

                                                                              Violinist Nancy Dinovo plays at a memorial service for the victims of 9/11. Image by Christopher Morris

                                                                              True love is timeless

                                                                              old friends

                                                                                Friends spending some time together. Image by Cristian Bortes

                                                                                sitting around a fire

                                                                                  A group of friends sits around a campfire eating. Image by New Old Stock

                                                                                  elderly couple

                                                                                    An elderly couple walks down a street together. Image by Matteo Paciotti

                                                                                    Featured photo credit: Matteo Paciotti via flickr.com

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