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Everybody Dies, But Not Everybody Lives

Everybody Dies, But Not Everybody Lives

Does it ring a bell with you — In your first years of college, there’s a splurge out on earned pennies. Then the socially defined ‘norms’ of establishing stability set in, bursting the bubble. Once the rigid 9-5 job set in, you started saving and even walked away from your own moments of escapades. And time trickled away. Days passed by, months passed by and years passed by. When on the verge of a possible promotion, you rationalized all dream procrastinations, making defined norms of stability a security key. Your passion and youth fades out, and your job takes over every segment of your being. Your dreams are set aside for a filled wallets without emotions…

I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.

This is one of the most common regrets people have before they die, recorded in a collection of the most common regrets[1] by Bonnie Ware, a nurse of terminally ill patients with chronic conditions.

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Unfulfilling life leads to more regrets

Many people seem to be living in a trance state of rigid routine lifestyles accumulated over years. These routines lay out a perception of stability, which amounts to an illusion in a fluctuating world. Bland life variety comes from changing television channels or ears out for latest celebrity or politician scandals doing their roundabouts.

Many dreams are unfulfilled due to the fact of not choosing to pursue them. Overworking leads to missing interaction with children and partners. Hoarded capsules of resentment and bitterness all through life because of lacking courage to express the true feelings. Settling for a mediocrity and essence of existence fades out true capability.

Many long for happiness in its true essence, but the fear of change comes with a false presentation of contentment to others and themselves.

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Friendships and connections slip away once life activities capture them in a net of economic hubs and activities. Beneficial old friends come in the limelight in their final moments, and there is regret about not giving friends the necessary attention and time.

Regret comes mainly in the form of what we did not do, and not about what we did

The journey of our soul is an intrepid myriad of a maze with tidal waves life experiences blended in bouts of hurdles and storms. When we are in our twenties we are set in a robust mode to take the launch into worldwide possibilities. There is an outburst of passion and energy to explore every hidden corner of the universe. Exploring should have no limits.

To live life to the fullest, allow changes in the present moment

Decide on what is of importance to you. Focus on yourself, not what others desire you to be. Everyone has an opinion, even society can impose on your ambitions, yet every breath you take is your own life moments. Once you focus on yourself, pieces of the life puzzle come together.

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Your ambitions matter, don’t aim to settle down in early stages of life on an illusion of ‘stability’. Take all the risks you need, do not postpone dreams. There might be danger in risks, but remember that every reward has a risk attached to it. Looking back on years that passed by, the deepest regrets come from risks and challenges not taken.

Your past is an important thread to reflect on the lesson learned to step forward into the future. Plan your future, reflect on your past for lessons learned, but live in your present. By being anxious about the future of struggling with something that happened in the past obstacles are sprouted  in living life to the fullest. Live in the present and do not get straddle in ‘Why did I?’, “Why didn’t I’ syndrome.[2]

There will always be people in your life sphere pointing out streams of your failures. Success comes from persisting through failures. So take action on your ideas creatively, mindfully and with awareness. [3]

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And don’t forget— express your love to your friends and family often.

Reference

[1] Regrets of the Dying, Bonnie Ware
[2] Living in the Moment is Key to Happiness, Planet of Susccess
[3] Journey Of My Soul, Tu Nokwe

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Nena Tenacity

Nena is passionate about writing. She shares her everyday health and lifestyle tips on Lifehack.

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Last Updated on December 10, 2019

5 Smart Reasons to Start Journal Writing Today

5 Smart Reasons to Start Journal Writing Today

Here’s the truth: your effectiveness at life is not what it could be. You’re missing out.

Each day passes by and you have nothing to prove that it even happened. Did you achieve something? Go on a date? Have an emotional breakthrough? Who knows?

But what you do know is that you don’t want to make the same mistakes that you’ve made in the past.

Our lives are full of hidden gems of knowledge and insight, and the most recent events in our lives contain the most useful gems of all. Do you know why? It’s simple, those hidden lessons are the most up to date, meaning they have the largest impact on what we’re doing right now.

But the question is, how do you get those lessons? There’s a simple way to do it, and it doesn’t involve time machines:

Journal writing.

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Improved mental clarity, the ability to see our lives in the big picture, as well as serving as a piece of evidence cataloguing every success we’ve ever had; we are provided all of the above and more by doing some journal writing.

Journal writing is a useful and flexible tool to help shed light on achieving your goals.

Here’s 5 smart reasons why you should do journal writing:

1. Journals Help You Have a Better Connection with Your Values, Emotions, and Goals

By journaling about what you believe in, why you believe it, how you feel, and what your goals are, you understand your relationships with these things better. This is because you must sort through the mental clutter and provide details on why you do what you do and feel what you feel.

Consider this:

Perhaps you’ve spent the last year or so working at a job you don’t like. It would be easy to just suck it up and keep working with your head down, going on as if it’s supposed to be normal to not like your job. Nobody else is complaining, so why should you, right?

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But a little journal writing will set things straight for you. You don’t like your job. You feel like it’s robbing you of happiness and satisfaction, and you don’t see yourself better there in the future.

The other workers? Maybe they don’t know, maybe they don’t care. But you do, you know and care enough to do something about it. And you’re capable of fixing this problem because your journal writing allows you to finally be honest with yourself about it.

2. Journals Improve Mental Clarity and Help Improve Your Focus

If there’s one thing journal writing is good for, it’s clearing the mental clutter.

How does it work? Simply, whenever you have a problem and write about it in a journal, you transfer the problem from your head to the paper. This empties the mind, allowing allocation of precious resources to problem-solving rather than problem-storing.

Let’s say you’ve been juggling several tasks at work. You’ve got data entry, testing, e-mails, problems with the boss, and so on—enough to overwhelm you—but as you start journal writing, things become clearer and easier to understand: Data entry can actually wait till Thursday; Bill kindly offered earlier to do my testing; For e-mails, I can check them now; the boss is just upset because Becky called in sick, etc.

You become better able to focus and reason your tasks out, and this is an indispensable and useful skill to have.

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3. Journals Improve Insight and Understanding

As a positive consequence of improving your mental clarity, you become more open to insights you may have missed before. As you write your notes out, you’re essentially having a dialogue with yourself. This draws out insights that you would have missed otherwise; it’s almost as if two people are working together to better understand each other. This kind of insight is only available to the person who has taken the time to connect with and understand themselves in the form of writing.

Once you’ve gotten a few entries written down, new insights can be gleaned from reading over them. What themes do you see in your life? Do you keep switching goals halfway through? Are you constantly dating the same type of people who aren’t good for you? Have you slowly but surely pushed people out of your life for fear of being hurt?

All of these questions can be answered by simply self-reflecting, but you can only discover the answers if you’ve captured them in writing. These questions are going to be tough to answer without a journal of your actions and experiences.

4. Journals Track Your Overall Development

Life happens, and it can happen fast. Sometimes we don’t take the time to stop and look around at what’s happening to us at each moment. We don’t get to see the step-by-step progress that we’re making in our own lives. So what happens? One day it’s the future, and you have no idea how you’ve gotten there.

Journal writing allows you to see how you’ve changed over time, so you can see where you did things right, and you can see where you took a misstep and fell.

The great thing about journals is that you’ll know what that misstep was, and you can make sure it doesn’t happen again—all because you made sure to log it, allowing yourself to learn from your mistakes.

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5. Journals Facilitate Personal Growth

The best thing about journal writing is that no matter what you end up writing about, it’s hard to not grow from it. You can’t just look at a past entry in which you acted shamefully and say “that was dumb, anyway!” No, we say “I will never make a dumb choice like that again!”

It’s impossible not to grow when it comes to journal writing. That’s what makes journal writing such a powerful tool, whether it’s about achieving goals, becoming a better person, or just general personal-development. No matter what you use it for, you’ll eventually see yourself growing as a person.

Kickstart Journaling

How can journaling best be of use to you? To vent your emotions? To help achieve your goals? To help clear your mind? What do you think makes journaling such a useful life skill?

Know the answer? Then it’s about time you reap the benefits of journal writing and start putting pen to paper.

Here’s what you can do to start journaling:

Featured photo credit: Jealous Weekends via unsplash.com

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