Advertising
Advertising

20 Things You Need to Stop Doing

20 Things You Need to Stop Doing

Life is short. It may feel like it takes forever sometimes, but the reality is that you live, and a short time later, you die. It happens so quickly, many people don’t even realize they had a life until it’s already over. If you don’t want to be one of those people who looks back on their life with regret, here are some things you need to stop doing immediately:

1 – Stop Doubting Yourself

If you don’t believe in yourself, nobody will. Success starts in your mind, and if all you’re doing is putting yourself down and predicting failure, it’ll become a self-fulfilling prophecy. Instead of doubting yourself, think positively. Not only will you be happier and more successful, you’ll spread it to everyone around you. Get some tips to help you think more positively with this lifehack.

doubt

    2 – Stop Being Negative

    Now that you’re done doubting yourself, stop doubting others. You don’t like when people are critical of you, so stop being critical of others. Think about how you make other people feel – even if you have good intentions, people don’t like hearing negativity. Stop saying negative things in negative ways and learn how to criticize without causing offense with this lifehack.

    3 – Stop Procrastinating

    I don’t feel like procrastinating right now – I’ll do it tomorrow. When you procrastinate, you remain stagnant. Whatever you’re putting off doesn’t go away; it stays in front of you like a carrot on a stick. Take the carrot, resolve the problem, and move on. You’ll be much happier in the long run. Don’t wait – learn how to stop procrastinating with this lifehack.

    Advertising

    4 – Stop Being Mean

    It’s completely possible to step on someone’s toes without meaning to – it happens all the time. There’s no need to pile on by purposefully doing mean things, so make a conscious effort to stop being mean. If someone wrongs you, let it go. There’s no need to seek vengeance unless that’s the type of person you want to be. Learn how to stop being mean with this lifehack.

    burger-and-fries-1371533338to1
      5 – Stop Eating Out

      Eating out is the biggest waste of money. Every so often it’s nice to treat yourself, but eating out for every meal is the quickest way to drain your bank account. Learn how to cook at least a handful of foods you enjoy: It’ll save you money, keep you healthier, and occasionally impress people. Improve your cooking skills with this lifehack.

      6 – Stop Being Lazy

      Lazy people are annoying – it’s like pulling teeth getting them to do anything. If I can’t do something as simple as going to a movie with you without having to factor in an hour of convincing you to get your lazy butt out of bed, I’d rather go alone. People have enough trouble motivating themselves; don’t make your friends and family waste their valuable energy motivating you as well. Tired of being lazy? Learn how to stop being lazy with this lifehack.

      7 – Stop Complaining

      We all have problems, and sometimes we need to vent to someone. That’s acceptable, but pay attention to how often you’re venting. If you have a friend you always vent to but never talk to about happy subjects, from that person’s perspective, you’re a Debbie (or Donald) Downer. We all love helping our friends and family, but when all you get from someone is negativity, it’s easier to cut them off than help, especially if they’re always complaining about the same things. If you must complain, learn how to complain successfully with this lifehack.

      8 – Stop Being Selfish

      If you only think about yourself, you’ll soon find yourself by yourself. Stop for a minute and think about how your actions affect other people – did you take the last cup of coffee from the break room? Refill it! Do you live with others? Don’t drink out the milk carton. We share this world 100% of the time, so every action you take can affect other people. If you’re not sure whether or not you’re selfish, learn how to spot selfish with this lifehack.

      Advertising

      time-on-big-ben-871288272557hWmZ
        9 – Stop Wasting Time

        I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again: time is the most valuable resource we have. Don’t waste your time on unproductive things. If you want to explore the world’s dark corners, that’s great. I still associate with people who have not-so-kosher careers, but I don’t hang out with those people at the expense of my own short- and long-term goals. Learn more about how to stop wasting time with bad friends with this lifehack.

        10 – Stop Watching TV

        I won’t stand on a moral soapbox about why your television set is a tool of the devil. I love TV shows, and I think we’re experiencing a Renaissance of quality content. The problem is that cable television is a dead medium. Those of you still tuning in regularly are holding back the progression of entertainment technology. You’re keeping cable on life support and encouraging providers to price gouge on internet. Stop ruining it for everyone and cut the cord already: learn how to live without a TV with this lifehack.

        11 – Stop Making Promises

        Always under-promise and over-deliver. When you make a promise, you’re adding responsibility to your plate that, despite all your best intentions, you may not be able to deliver on. More often than not, your promise is an absolute (i.e “I promise I’ll always love you”), and only Sith deal in absolutes. Instead of making a promise with your words, simply be there when people need you, and exceed their expectations with your actions. Learn more about promises with this lifehack.

        12 – Stop Being Complacent

        It’s cool to listen to people’s opinions; the problem comes when you follow everyone’s advice at the expense of having your own independent thoughts. Just because someone tells you to do something doesn’t mean it has to be done. Just because something is a law doesn’t mean it has to be followed. There is a difference between a just and an unjust law, and sometimes you have to shake things up for the greater good. Stop following and become a leader with this lifehack.

        13 – Stop Being a Pushover

        We live in a capitalistic society in which everyone’s trying to sell us something. There are scores of scientists whose only job is to figure out how to drain you of all your time, money, and other resources. Everyone’s looking out for themselves in one way or another, and you need to do the same. Stop putting yourself out because you’re too shy to say no. If you’re a pushover, learn some confidence tips and tricks with this lifehack.

        Advertising

        14 – Stop Listening to Haters

        No matter what you want to do in life, there’s always someone around to tell you why it can’t and won’t work. I can come up with millions of reasons Twitter won’t work, and yet it’s one of the most popular social media sites on the web. My opinion didn’t stop Twitter’s success any more than it convinced Kobe Bryant to quit the NBA or Josh Hartnett to stop acting. Why would you let someone’s opinion stop you? Stop negative people in their tracks with this lifehack.

        15 – Stop Being Wasteful

        You don’t finish your meals, and away food instead. You leave the faucet running when you brush your teeth, pouring precious water down the drain. You drive places you could easily walk, burning gasoline (a non-renewable resource). You are wasteful, and it needs to stop. Follow the lead of large, respected corporations and go green with this lifehack.

        scrapyard
          16 – Stop Littering

          The only thing I hate more than wasteful people are litterbugs. Litterbugs are my least favorite bug, and there are more than you’d think. If you’ve ever thrown even one piece of gum, paper, candy wrapper, cigarette butt, etc on the ground, you’re a disgusting litterbug, and you should be ashamed of yourself. There are over 7 billion people in the world – if each person only throws one “innocent” piece of garbage on the ground, that’s 7 billion pieces of garbage littering a world in which nobody “did it”.

          Your one decision makes a HUGE difference, and I will not allow you to blow it off and walk around with your head held high. You’re a litterbug, and it needs to stop immediately. You don’t get a lifehack for this one, you filthy animal. Just stop – you already know how.

          17 – Stop Taking Everything Personally

          People get offended about the strangest things. Take Kendrick Lamar’s now-infamous verse on “Control” this summer: he called out a list of a dozen rappers he thinks he’s better than (and he’s right). The internet went crazy, and rappers all over the industry rushed to their mics to record a response. The thing is, all K-Dot said is he’s the best rapper. Everyone took it personally, and that’s exactly what he was going for. The lesson to learn from this is that not everything is about you, and if you’re easily upset, someone will use that to their advantage. Stop being so sensitive and learn to manage the people who bother you with this lifehack.

          Advertising

          18 – Stop Talking

          Sometimes it’s best to just STFU – especially in relationships. I can’t even count how many times I created an issue that didn’t need to be an issue simply because I opened my mouth. Even if what you want to say is important, just shut up and ride it out. You can say more with your actions than words, and you can’t listen when you’re talking. Discover the perfect ratio of listening to talking with this lifehack.

          19 – Stop Ignoring Signs

          I sometimes think I’m mystical because I see signs other people don’t… like the speed limit. People like to look for divine signs telling them what they should be doing. I’m no fan of imaginary deities, but I wholeheartedly believe the path is there if you know where to look. It’s up to you to recognize and interpret the signs for your own life. Stop letting life pass you by, and learn to read signs with this lifehack.

          20 – Just Stop, and Breathe…

          No matter what you’re doing in life or how your day is going, there’s always room to just stop for a moment and just breathe. Try it right now to celebrate getting through this list of everything you’re doing wrong. You’ve been a great sport…now stop…breathe…and move on…

          Can’t move on? Learn 4 Unconventional Solutions for Getting Stuck

           

          More by this author

          7 Ways To Make Exercise Fun For Everyone Say Goodbye to a Skinny Body: How to Gain Weight Fast 24 Easy Ways To Make Money On The Internet What 500 Calories Really Looks Like in Different Foods 20 Awesome Screensavers that Make your Desktop Delightful

          Trending in Communication

          1 30 Refreshing Routines to Boost Your Morning Motivation 2 Feeling Like a Failure? 10 Simple Things to Help You Rise Again 3 What Motivates You to Succeed in Life and Keep Moving Forward? 4 6 Effective Negotiation Skills to Master 5 5 Ways to Turn Around a Bad Day at Work

          Read Next

          Advertising
          Advertising
          Advertising

          Published on September 23, 2020

          6 Effective Negotiation Skills to Master

          6 Effective Negotiation Skills to Master

          I don’t know about you, but many times when I hear the word negotiate I think of lawyers working out a business deal or having to do battle with a car salesman to try to get a lower price. Since I am in recruiting, the term “negotiation” comes up when someone is attempting to get a higher compensation package.

          If we think about it, we tend to negotiate almost every day in a wide variety of things we do. Getting a handle on the important negotiation skills can be incredibly beneficial in many parts of our lives. Let’s take a look at 6 effective negotiation skills to master.

          What is Negotiation?

          First, let’s take a look at what negotiation is. Put simply, negotiation is a method by which people settle their differences. It is a process in which compromise or agreement can be reached without argument or dispute.

          Anytime two people or sides disagree on something, they are almost always looking for the best possible outcome for their side. This could be from an individual’s perspective or someone representing an organization.

          In reality, it’s rare that one side gets everything they want and the other side gets nothing that they are seeking. Seeking to reach a common ground of sorts where both sides feel like they are getting most of what they want is the key to being successful and maintaining the relationship.

          Places We Negotiate

          I’ve mentioned that we negotiate in just about all phases of our life. For those of you who are shaking your head no, I invite you to think about the following:

          1. Work/Business

          This one is the most obvious and it’s what naturally comes to mind when we think of the word “negotiate”.

          When you first started at your current job, you might have asked for a higher salary. It could be that you delivered a huge new client to your company and used this as leverage in your most recent evaluation for more compensation. If you work with vendors (and just about every company does), maybe you worked them to a lower price or better contract terms.

          Advertising

          In recruiting, I negotiate with candidates and hiring managers all the time to land the best talent I can find. It’s very common to accept additional work with the (sometimes spoken, sometimes unspoken) agreement that it will benefit your career in the future.

          Recently, I took over a project that was my boss was working on so that I would be able to attend a conference later in the year. And so it goes, we do this all day long at work.

          2. Personal

          I don’t know about you, but I negotiate with my spouse all the time. I’ll cook dinner with the understanding that she does the dishes. Who wants to mow the lawn and who wants to vacuum and dust the house?

          I think we should save 10% for retirement, but she thinks 5% is plenty. Therefore, we save 8%. And don’t even get me started with my kids. My older daughter can borrow my car as soon as she finishes her chores. My younger daughter can go hang out with her friends when her homework is done.

          Then, there are all those interactions in our personal lives outside our homes. The carpenter wants to charge me $12,000 to build a new deck. I think $10,000 is plenty so we agree on $11,000. I ask my neighbor if I can borrow his snowblower in the winter if I invite him over the next time I grill steak. And so on.

          3. Ourselves

          You didn’t expect this one, did you? We negotiate with ourselves all day long.

          I’ll make sure I don’t skip my workout tomorrow since I’m going to have that extra piece of pizza. My spouse has been quiet the last few days, is it worth me asking her about, or should I leave it alone? I think the car place charged me for some repairs that weren’t needed, should I say something or just let it go? I know my friend has been having some personal challenges, should I check in with him? We’ve been friends for a long time, I’m sure he’d come to me if he needed help. I’ve got the #4 pick in this year’s Fantasy Football draft, should I choose a running back or a wide receiver?

          Think about that non-stop voice inside your head. It always seems to be chattering away about something and many times, it’s us negotiating with ourselves. I’ll finish up that report that the boss needs before I turn on the football game.

          Advertising

          Why Negotiation Skills Are So Important

          Put simply, negotiation skills are important because we all interact with other people, and not only other people but other organizations and groups of people as well.

          We all rarely want the same thing or outcome. Most of the time a vendor is looking at getting you to pay a higher price for something than you want to spend. Therefore, it’s important to negotiate to some middle ground that works well for both sides.

          My wife and I disagree on how much to save for retirement. If we weren’t married it wouldn’t be an issue. We’d each contribute how much we wanted to on our retirement funds. We choose to be married, so we have to come to some agreement that we both feel comfortable with. We have to compromise. Therefore, we have to negotiate.

          If we each lived on a planet by ourselves, we would be free to do just about anything we wanted to. We wouldn’t have to compromise with anyone because we wouldn’t interact with anyone. We would make every choice unilaterally the way we wanted to.

          As we all know, this isn’t how things are. We are constantly interacting with other people and organizations, each one with their own agenda’s, viewpoints, and opinions. Therefore, we have to be able to work together.

          6 Negotiation Skills to Master

          Having strong negotiation skills helps us create win-win situations with others, allowing us to get most of what we want in conjunction with others around us.

          Now, let’s look at 6 effective negotiation skills to master.

          1. Preparation

          Preparation is a key place to start with when getting ready to negotiate. Being prepared means having a clear vision of what you want and how you’d go about achieving it. It means knowing what the end goal looks like and also what you are willing to give to get it.

          Advertising

          It also means knowing who you are negotiating with and what areas they might be willing to compromise on. You should also know what your “bottom line” is. By “bottom line” I mean what is the most you are willing to give up to get what you want.

          For instance, several years ago, I decided it was time to get a newer car. I say newer because I wanted a “new to me” car, not a brand new car. I did my research and figured out what type of car I wanted. I decided on what must-have items on the car I wanted, the highest amount of miles that would already be on it, the colors I was willing to get it in, and the highest amount of money I was willing to pay.

          After visiting numerous car dealerships I was able to negotiate buying a car. I knew what I was willing to give up (amount of money) and what I was willing to accept, things like the color, amount of miles, etc. I came prepared. This is critical.

          2. Clear Communication

          The next key skill you need to be an effective negotiator is clear communication. You have to be able to clearly articulate what you want to the other party. This means both clear verbal and written communication.

          If you can’t clearly tell the other person what you want, how do you expect to get it? Have you ever worked through something with a vendor or someone else only to learn of a surprise right at the end that wasn’t talked about before? This is not what you would call clear communication. It’s essential to be able to share a coherent and logical vision with the person you are working with.

          3. Active Listening

          Let’s do a quick review of active listening. This is when you are completely focused on the speaker, understand their message, comprehend the information, and respond appropriately. This is a necessary ingredient to be able to negotiate successfully. You must be able to fully focus on the other person’s wants to completely understand them.

          If you aren’t giving them your full attention, you may miss some major points or details. This leads to frustration down the road on both sides. Ensure you are employing your active listening skills when in arbitration mode.

          4. Teamwork and Collaboration

          To be able to get to a place of common ground and a win-win scenario, you have to have a sense of teamwork and collaboration.

          Advertising

          If you are only thinking about yourself and what you want without giving much care to what the other person is wanting, you are bound to wind up without a solution. The other person may get frustrated and give up if they see you are unwilling to meet them halfway or care little for what they want.

          When you collaborate, you are working together to help each other get what is most important to you. The other upside to negotiating with a sense of teamwork and collaboration is that it helps create a sense of trust, which, in turn, helps provide positive energy for working to a successful conclusion.

          5. Problem Solving

          Problem-solving is another key negotiation skill. When you are working with the other person to get the deal done many times you’ll face new challenges along the way.

          Maybe you want a new vendor to provide training on the software they are selling you but they say it’s going to cost an additional $20,000 to provide this service. If you don’t have the additional $20,000 in the budget to spend on the software but you feel the training is critical, how are you going to solve that problem?

          From what I’ve seen, most vendors aren’t willing to provide additional services without getting paid for them. This is where problem-solving skills will help continue the discussions. You might suggest to the vendor that your company will also be looking to replace their financial software next year, and you’d be happy to ensure they get one of the first seats at the table when the time comes if they could perhaps lower the pricing on their training.

          There’s a solution to most challenges, but it takes problem-solving skills to work through them effectively.

          6. Decision-Making Ability

          Finally, having strong decision-making ability will help you seal the deal when you get to a place where everyone feels like they are getting what works for them. Each step of the way you can cross off the list when you get what you are looking for and decide to move onto the next item. Then, once you have all of your must-have boxes checked and the other side feels good about things, it’s time to shake hands and sign on the dotted line. Powerful decision-making ability will help you get to the finish line together.

          Conclusion

          There you have it, 6 effective negotiation skills to master to lead a more fulfilling life. Once we realize that we negotiate in one form or another almost every day in every phase of our lives, we realize how critical a skill it is.

          Possessing strong negotiation skills will help you in nearly every one of your relationships at both the workplace and in your personal life. If you feel your arbitration tools could use some sharpening, try some of the 6 effective negotiation skills to master that we’ve talked about.

          More Tips to Improve Your Negotiation Skills

          Featured photo credit: Windows via unsplash.com

          Read Next