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Last Updated on November 26, 2020

Why Is Life So Hard? 4 Things You Can Do About It

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Why Is Life So Hard? 4 Things You Can Do About It

If you are wondering why life is so hard, then there is probably something missing from your life. Ask yourself, are you living a life of complacency or a life of purpose?

Regardless of how you define “purpose,” you know whether you are chasing it or settling for less. Interestingly enough, you will face challenges in both cases. The only difference is how you feel at the end of the day.

When you question why life is so hard and you are chasing your purpose, you know there is something that makes everything worthwhile. As “risk-free” as settling may appear, you will bear the burden of never reaching your true potential. You will always be wondering if there is more to life than the one you have lived.

While the journey to change your life is not always easy, it should ultimately be enjoyable. You should enjoy learning more about yourself, your goals, and your motivations. If you find yourself wondering if life gets any better, then this article is for you.

1. Surviving Versus Thriving

Every day, you have two choices. You can choose to listen to the loud voice of fear and self-doubt, or you can listen to the quiet voice of confidence and purpose.

The quiet voice of confidence is the voice that is pushing you to chase your dream life. Your dream life is the life you would live if you did not have any responsibilities or obstacles. If you are wondering why life is so hard, you could be struggling to accomplish your purpose. You may want to start a business, but you need consistent income from your current job. There could be the challenge of overcoming a disadvantage you were born with or the environment you grew up in. Whatever the reason, there is a struggle that you have not conquered yet.

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While you may feel you are making the best decision with the cards you have been dealt with, that doesn’t change the fact that you are meant to do more than survive. As essential as survival is, you don’t want to reach the end of your life never having truly lived. There are plenty of people who find their last days filled with regret because they always succumbed to their fears.

If you want to make your life easier, then stop putting your dreams on hold. Start taking small steps toward accomplishing them each day. Also, make sure you celebrate your small wins. This will help you build momentum and enjoy the process, so you don’t feel like quitting when challenges arise.

Even though you may not enjoy failure, it is okay to fail at trying something new. In fact, failure is a great sign to know that you are chasing your purpose and listening to your voice of confidence. Continue to learn from your mistakes and allow them to transform you into your ideal self.

2. Emotions Run High

If knowledge is power, then knowing what to do with said knowledge should make life easier. However, you will find that is not always the case. In fact, you can go out on a very stable limb and conclude that most people know what they should be doing.

Each year, close to half of the population makes a New Year’s Resolution. They have a plan of attack and they know what needs to happen for them to accomplish their desired results. Yet, less than 10% of people actually achieve their resolution each year. [1]

This begs the question: Why is life so hard when you have a plan you know will work?

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There are plenty of salespeople who know if they reach out to a certain number of people each day, they will have a successful business. Some couples know if they listen and consider each other’s feelings before taking action, their relationship will benefit. Whether you are talking about professional or personal goals, you know the action needed for success.

The disconnect occurs when you haven’t taken your emotions into consideration. It is difficult to consider someone’s feelings when you feel taken for granted or unappreciated. It can be difficult to make the next phone call when the last five people said no to you. There is an emotional aspect of life that makes doing the right thing difficult.

Studies show you can increase the likelihood of you overcoming your emotions when you use the ‘If-Then Principle’ to prepare yourself ahead of time. [2] The way it works is you create your response beforehand, so your emotions don’t get the best of you later.

For example, if you have friends who eat unhealthily, you can say, “If I go to lunch with them, then I will order a salad.” When you are dealing with sales, you may say, “If I am told no, then I will keep making calls until I hear yes”. As simple as it sounds, knowing how you will handle setbacks is what sets apart those who are surviving from those who are thriving.

3. Burning the Candle on Both Ends

If you are still questioning why life is so hard, then you need to ask yourself if you are working too hard. You probably chuckled a little at the statement, but humor me.

Your life is a cumulation of your experiences. Some of those experiences are going to be more pleasant than others. If you find yourself with an unbalanced amount of unpleasant experiences, you need to determine if you are setting unrealistic goals for yourself.

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For example, if someone sets a goal to lose 60lbs in 30 days, they may not know how unlikely that goal is to accomplish. If they knew the average weight loss regiment would recommend losing one to two pounds a week, then they would know two pounds a day is unhealthy. Nevertheless, if you set an unrealistic goal, you are going to feel deflated when you miss it.

Life gets even more difficult as you try to find a way to accomplish the achievable in an unrealistic timeline. You miss the fact that you have achieved tremendous progress along the way because you feel the failure of not achieving your goal. This can continue to be frustrating and have you asking yourself why is life so hard.

The best way to overcome this feeling of frustration is to give yourself more time. [3] You will be surprised how much lower your stress levels are when you give yourself more time.

Do you recall a time you had an assignment due in school or a project due at work and you needed more time? You know your presentation would be flawless if you only had another day or two. Then, by a stroke of luck, the meeting or deadline was moved back a week because someone got sick or had a conflict in attending. How amazing do you feel when you find yourself with more time than you expected? Go ahead and give yourself the additional time and see how it changes your perception of the situation.

4. Looking in All the Wrong Places

Life can be really hard if you are only thinking about everything wrong in your life. Believe me, I know there is a lot wrong in the world, but there is plenty right in the world, too.

You get to choose what you want to focus on. If you train your mind to only recognize what is wrong with the world, it makes it almost impossible to see the opportunities. Imagine someone who only watches the news. Most people acknowledge the news is full of negative stories that create fear, anger, and frustration. As a result, your perception of the world will be skewed by the constant bombardment of negative information.

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A negative perception can also be created by associating with people who are always complaining about something. Whether they are complaining about their family, their relationships, or their job, it will cause you to ponder about the issues in your life.

For you to overcome a negative mindset, you need to take two actions. First, you need to reduce the negative information you are absorbing. You will need to spend less time watching the news and you need to reduce the amount of time you spend with negative people. This can be difficult if the negative person is a family member or a close friend. However, if their mindset has you question why is life so hard, you owe it to yourself to change your associations.

The second thing you need to do is create a positivity journal. You don’t need to write in it every day, but you should read it every day. You should start each day reading about all the things you love about your life. This will help you appreciate the joys of your life even more because those joys are not being drowned out by the day to day challenges.

Final Thoughts

The reason why life is so hard can vary from person to person. Your personal growth and transformation should comfort you every time you look back and recognize how far you have come.

Don’t grow discouraged when things don’t happen as quickly as you want. Instead, focus on the fact that you are taking a step in the right direction each day. If you are better each day than you were the previous day, you will love you the person you become when it is all said and done.

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Featured photo credit: Krists Luhaers via unsplash.com

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Reference

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Last Updated on September 16, 2021

Feel That Life Is Meaningless? Here’s How to Find Meaning

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Feel That Life Is Meaningless? Here’s How to Find Meaning

Have you ever felt like you’re unable to feel anything? You know exactly what this feeling is if you’ve been through it. The feeling of a meaningless life is unexplainable.

A meaningless life may not look bad. In fact, there’s likely nothing obviously wrong. You may be living in your dream house with the love of your life. Your well-paid job in the company that you dreamt of is doing great, too. However, you feel like a part of your heart and soul are missing.

If you feel like nothing is right, you may be living a meaningless life. But don’t you worry, because you’re in the right place to find the perfect solution for you and your unique life.

What Is a Meaningless Life?

Let’s start by helping you put a finger on your issue. Is it actually a meaningless life or just a rough slump?

Be clear on one thing: no human’s life is ever truly meaningless. Basically, your life can never lose its meaning and purpose. If you’re living in this world, there is some reason deep down. The only issue is that you have lost the vision to identify it. Your perspective is too blurred to figure out what you are in this world for.

A meaningless life may mean you’re going through an existential crisis. You could be borderline depressed. The feeling of emptiness may prevail all other emotions. However, you can be sure that, despite all of this, there’s still meaning to your existence.

All you have to do is push through to find it.

If you feel that you’re living a meaningless life, negativity will surround you like wildfire. However, you’ve got to keep your head high so that you can look ahead and find an answer. You have to strive to find your life’s meaning to continue to live a life of high motivation.

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Before you move on with the rest of the process, make sure to first imprint this in your mind. Only then will you be able to guide your thought process in the right direction.

Is There Any Meaning to Life?

Life, in its literal term, means to exist and reproduce. The reproduction not only includes the creation of humans like yourself, but also of thoughts, ideologies, and philosophies.

A person who is living a meaningless life has a very different view of what life is supposed to be. That is where the issue arises. To understand the meaning of life without any misconceptions, one should look at the philosophy behind this concept.

Like most branches of research, philosophy has numerous diverging answers to answer what the meaning of life is[1]. Here’s a quick summary of what I consider the most suitable understanding.

It all starts from a human’s expectations and, ultimately, reactions. Every individual expects something from the world and, in return, has to react to the expectations of others. Generally, this idea is surrounded by wanting goodness. To achieve that, a person has to do good deeds as well.

This cycle continues. But, of course, it is very complex. A lot of factors contribute to this cycle, such as selfishness, a different point of view of what’s good, emotions, likes and dislikes, etc.

The point of this entire concept in philosophy is that, ultimately, the process of growth and reproduction comes to an end for every human. There’s no escaping that. Therefore, the goal is to live life in a way that, when the individual’s growth comes to an end, something good is still left behind for the cycle to continue.

Where Does the Good Come From?

This is the point where the differences come in. People with different beliefs opt for varying methods to reach the same goal.

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There are four main schools of thought in philosophy in this regard, and they all offer different advice on how to move past living a meaningless life[2].

1. God

One school believes that God is the center of everything we do. Hence, goodness is anything that goes in line with the religion that you believe in.

2. The Soul

The other school of thought centers their actions on the soul. For them, anything that satisfies and calms your inner self is the path you should follow, regardless of what the rest of the world thinks.

3. Objectivists

The objectivists say that everything in the world is defined; the good and bad are certain, so no one should go beyond the set boundaries.

4. Subjectivists

The subjectivists, on the other hand, believe that since every individual’s cognition varies, the meaning of every single thing in the world is different. No two individuals can have a similar thought process.

All in all, life comes down to one thing only: goodness. That is what life should be, and that is what you should leave behind. How you achieve it depends on which school of thought you agree with. Whatever you believe in is ultimately what the meaning of your life is.

How to Stop Living a Meaningless Life

Now you know that there is a meaning to your life, without question. You also have an idea of what this meaning is. You’ve got to figure out what you consider “good” and build your life around it.

Regardless of which school of thought you agree with or what you have decided your life’s meaning to be, the process to implement will be a bit hard. To make it easier, here are some universal tips.

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1. Unlearn What You’ve Been Told All Your Life

Do not be distracted by what you’ve learned in your life until now. The truth is, you could have been told something for 30 years of your life only to find out that it was all baseless.

The only thing in life that is definite is that there are no rules. We didn’t come into this world with a rule book or defined meaning. Every individual was given the ability to make choices in their life. So, take hold of yours, learn your right and wrong from scratch, and make sure nothing is detracting you from the real meaning of your life. Don’t be afraid if you learn something that goes against your lifelong motto if it gets you away from living a meaningless life.

2. Know That You Matter

This has been said a couple of times by now but, honestly, the more you emphasize this fact, the easier it will be for you.

The fact that you’re alive, living in this world, and taking another breath to take means that you matter. Your life purpose is yet to be fulfilled, so you’ve still got to make some impact in this world.

You are the one person that has to change the world, even if it is something as small as changing the life of one tiny creature. Keep this in mind at all times.

3. Step Out of Your Comfort Zone

If your life’s meaning was somewhere inside the circle that you stay in, you would’ve found it by now. Isn’t it obvious that what you’re looking for is out of your comfort zone? Then, what’s keeping you from stepping out?

Don’t hesitate to step out. The short-term discomfort will help you find the long-term purpose of life, which will give you a lifetime of relaxation and a constant way out of a meaningless life.

4. Follow Your Heart

Whether you’re choosing which school of thought to follow or opting between what good to go after, never ignore your heart. Your intuition is your heart’s way of guiding you. Don’t let it take over, but also don’t forget to take it into consideration.

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5. Do Not Let Go of Your Passion

You know that one thing in life that you just cannot give up no matter hard you try? Stop trying to get rid of it. You’re passionate about something for a reason. It is a step for you to reach your life’s meaning.

6. Be More Mindful

The big things in life tend to take over the tiny details. These little things are signs to help you decode and find answers. Meditate if you have a hard time focusing, but always try your best to pay attention to the little experiences that you usually don’t notice.

Conclusion

If you’re a person who is going through the dilemma of living a meaningless life, try to use these tips to help you seek out your unique meaning. Although your life seems meaningless, rest assured that it’s not.

The ball is now in your court. You’re the one who has to do the rest of the work. Use the tips to help you find the true meaning of your life, and then stick to it. Get on with step 1 from today without losing any motivation at all.

All the work that you’ll put in the process now will help you achieve a life of happiness and peace worth living.

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Featured photo credit: Frida Aguilar Estrada via unsplash.com

Reference

[1] Philosophy Now: What is Life?
[2] Philosophy Now: What is The Meaning Of Life?

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