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10 Things to Do When You Think You’re Not Good Enough

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10 Things to Do When You Think You’re Not Good Enough

Have you battled against feelings of worthlessness? Irrespective of whatever a situation demands, are you feeling not good enough, like you’re falling short?

If you do, the first thing you need to know is that you are not alone. In fact, we’re all in this together.

I strongly feel every individual encounters this phase when life asks extremely tough questions. And just because we cannot answer every unpredictable question, most of us develop a feeling of hopelessness.

However, these trying times are essential for your transformation into a stronger and more positive individual.

Feeling not good enough can make you or break you. I’m sure you want to make your way ripping those dark clouds hovering over you. Are you pumped up for the challenge?

Here are 11 things to do when you think you’re not good enough.

1. Stop Comparing and Competing

Everyone is wired differently. But the problem with most of us is that, in the quest to become like everyone else, we lose our originality.

With that, we lose an integral quality: self-love[1].

The never-ending comparison with people can evoke a sense of worthlessness, especially today when social media feeds are full of amazing photos to compare out lives to. However, these tidbits don’t represent the complexities of life.

One study found that “participants who used Facebook most often had poorer trait self-esteem, and this was mediated by greater exposure to upward social comparisons on social media”[2]. The more you compare, the worse you feel.

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Take a moment to admire the great things in your own life, and only compare yourself to who you were yesterday.

2. Recall Your Past Achievements

If you can feel you are not good enough, trust me, you are capable enough to feel proud of yourself. Any positive emotion from your memory book can uplift your mind and rejuvenate you.

Be it the smallest thing, any sense of your past accomplishments will help negate the feeling of uselessness.

Switch on your positive reminders. It’s the perfect antidote.

3. Deactivate the Thinking Mode for Some Time

Fortunately, this isn’t as hard as it sounds. The mind is a powerful thing, and in a nanosecond, it can elevate or crush your mood because of the beliefs lurking behind your feelings.

When you think you are not good enough, remember it is just the frequency and quality of thoughts that need to change, not you.

Everyone encounters these hard times where you can’t do much to change things. The best approach is letting this phase pass without overthinking.

Instead of thinking and worrying, do something to take your mind off the negative thoughts. It could be exercise, painting, reading, or talking with a friend. Find what works for you.

4. Express the Negativity

Expressing negative emotions is imperative. It is the quickest way to unburden yourself from the misery of feeling not good enough.

Simply put, whenever you sense something is not right around or inside you, speak out! It might require valiant courage in the beginning.

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If you don’t have someone around to speak out, write out your negative feelings in a journal. This is another way to offload the thoughts that are causing you problems.

5. Choose the Right Person to Share Your Lows

You just cannot unveil your pure unfiltered emotions in front of everyone. This involves a level of vulnerability that demands trust and safety.

When you are expecting a shoulder to lean on that is not there, the effects of feeling useless may intensify and aggravate your pain, so this choice must be a careful one.

Make sure you flush out feelings of your hard times to one who knows you well. You may not get the advice you’re looking for, but you may get the strength to go through the tough times if you know you have a support system behind you.

6. Offer an Act of Compassion

Compassion literally means “to suffer together.” Among emotion researchers, it is defined as the feeling that arises when you are confronted with another’s suffering and feel motivated to relieve that suffering[3].

Yes, one of the best ways of reviving your higher self is by uplifting others. When you fulfill the emotional or financial needs of others, not only does it bring a smile to their face, but it also makes you feel content.

Don’t believe me? Try it!

Whenever you’re feeling like you’re not good enough, follow compassion. Try out some of the ideas below if you don’t know where to start[4]:

If you're feeling like you're not good enough, practice kindness.

    7. Focus on the Process Rather Than the Results

    Do you frequently think about the possessions attached to success before achieving something?

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    It is a common syndrome with many people in this fast-paced, materialistic world. We think about the name, fame, and luxury attached to success so much that when we come back to reality, it leads to frustration and impatience. We simply lose focus that adversely affects the execution of the process.

    Why? Your mind refuses to endure because it has tasted success in imagination. Then, insecurity seeps in to provoke the thought that you are not good enough.

    Wondering what to do? Resist the temptation to overthink success by developing self-control.

    8. Work out to Experience Liveliness

    Feeling not good enough? Most of the time, a small workout session is all you need to push yourself back to life.

    Any form of exercise not only detoxifies your body but also releases happy hormones in our mind. You don’t need to hit the gym every time; there are many exercises to help you stay on track from home.

    A healthy body and mind is the best combination to recover from your lows speedily.

    9. Stop Fulfilling the Undue Expectations of People

    Are you always trying to fulfill others’ expectations of you? Most of us have been doing this for a long time.

    If yes, you are digging your own grave. Not only will you lose people, but you’ll also lose your individuality. If it continues, you won’t be able to respect your priorities. It is bound to evoke the feeling of uselessness.

    Learn to say no to expectations and, instead, follow your own path with the people who accept it[5].

    10. Stop Criticizing Life and Start Appreciating It

    Are you blessed with the basic necessities of life needed to qualify for happiness—food, clothing, and shelter?

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    If you are this fortunate, you are ahead of most of the world’s population. So, whenever you think you are not good enough, just stop and appreciate your life for all the blessings it bestows on you.

    A healthy sense of gratitude enables you to see the bigger picture, and you adapt to demanding situations better.

    If you’re not sure how to develop a gratitude practice, check out this article.

    Final Thoughts

    “All of life is peaks and valleys. Don’t let the peaks get too high and the valleys too low.” -John Wooden

    Look on the bright side! You are one brave individual who has the guts to accept that something isn’t quite right. Not only that, but you are also ready to fix it.

    If you are not feeling good enough, that means your feeling quotient is working fine. And that’s great!

    The only concern is the uncontrollable negative thoughts that drive you away from positivity. What you need to do is slow down the thinking process and gradually revive your positive self.

    Always remember:

    Whenever you feel down, you need to handle yourself with extra love and care.

    More on What to Do When Feeling Not Good Enough

    Featured photo credit: Ivan Karasev via unsplash.com

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    Reference

    [1] tiny buddha: What Self-Love Means: 20+ Ways to Be Good to Yourself
    [2] Psychology of Popular Media Culture: Social Comparison, Social Media, and Self-Esteem
    [3] Greater Good Magazine: What Is Compassion?
    [4] Blessing Manifesting: 56 Random Acts of Kindness Ideas
    [5] Happy Realization: Either you are nude or naked; know the difference?

    More by this author

    Amanpreet Singh

    Amanpreet Singh is a soulful blogger by passion and a mindful businessman by profession.

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    Last Updated on January 19, 2022

    8 Important Mindsets for Success to Develop

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    8 Important Mindsets for Success to Develop

    Achieving great success in life depends a lot on the mindset. How we think directly affects the outcomes we produce and not the other way around. It’s our thoughts that determine our decisions and actions.

    Our behavior, habits, and even mood are a reflection of our thinking patterns. This means that each one of us is fully responsible for the life we live. Whether it’s successful or not, we are in charge. It’s in our power to become unstoppable if we want to. That’s why mindset for success has been such a popular topic among leaders.

    Let me ask you first: what does being successful mean to you?

    I’m sure that at least a part of it would include financial success as well as personal and professional achievements. Whatever that might mean to you, only you will know when you’ve reached the success level you were aiming for.

    I’m sure you would agree that success has many layers and a degree or preferred income level alone is not enough. Real success and prosperity include feeling content in who you are and how you’re making decisions. And that means that it begins with mindset mastery.

    Why Mindset Is the Key to Success

    Mindset is what differs between those who succeed and those who do not. If you’re serious about achieving success in any area of your life, you must learn to master yours. When you change your thinking, you change your action.

    When action changes, results change. In short, what you think, you become. Once you start to change your mindset, you will immediately start to change your behavior.

    It might sound easy in theory, but don’t get fooled by the simplicity. It’s not a one-night success type of thing. However, there are ways and tools that can and will help you achieve success with the right mindset. The good news is that you already have all the resources you need—yourself.

    “Change your mindset, change your life” sounds fairly easy, yet many of us put limits on ourselves. We say that it’s too late to learn a new skill or that we don’t have enough time or money to start a new career path.

    These limiting beliefs create our reality. We believe we can’t, so we don’t. If we instead lived in terms of “I can” and “I will”, imagine what we could achieve!

    Here is a simple truth:

    • You don’t need more time. We all have the same amount of hours in a day.
    • You don’t need more money to be wealthy. Start from where you’re at, like most people.
    • You don’t need to have great talent and skills. It can be developed if there is a will.

    What you need is a willingness to shift your mindset into success mode, and the rest will follow. Our thoughts have incredible power over our everyday lives, which is the key reason to develop a success mindset.

    How Does Mindset Affect Success?

    A success mindset triggers strategic thinking, builds self-confidence, and empowers you to act accordingly when things don’t go as planned. It’s what enables us to live life to the fullest and not have regrets.

    Mindset can change a lot, and here are just a few benefits that it can help you achieve:

    • Take action despite fears and doubts.
    • Look at problems as challenges that will get solved.
    • Stay grounded and calm in stressful situations.
    • Be resilient to stress and pressure.
    • Become proactive and decisive.

    Adopting a success mindset has many benefits that include developing healthy self-esteem, positive thoughts, healthy meaning to any event, harnessing drive, facing adversity with confidence, and more.

    Mindset is the mental attitude with which we approach something. It’s a collection of thoughts, assumptions, and beliefs. The mindset for success is what motivates us, keeps us focused, and empowers us.

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    How Do You Develop a Success Mindset?

    Before we dive into the actual mindsets to develop, here are some tips that will help you to achieve the mindset for success:

    • Get to know yourself—your interests, skills, personality, and other related things.
    • Decide based on your purpose rather than mood or situation.
    • Take control over yourself. You’re not a victim of life. You are the creator.
    • Look at every failure as growth and opportunity.

    When you start to notice negative thoughts or patterns creep in, remember that you are in charge of them. Don’t let the limiting beliefs keep you unproductive and unsuccessful.

    A positive mindset is critical to achieving your goals and dreams in life, according to mindset expert Angie Zimmerman.[1] This kind of mindset can be cultivated, but only if you are willing to open yourself up to new ways of thinking.

    The 8 Mindsets for Success

    To ensure you’re always in the right frame of mind to be successful, learn these eight mindsets for success and notice the changes they bring to your life.

    Remember that you are in charge and have everything you need to adopt these mindsets for success if you want to live an extraordinary life.

    1. Self-Acceptance Mindset

    Everything starts from within you. The better you get to know yourself, the better you’ll be able to adapt and grow beyond your wildest imagination.

    This very popular quote by the unknown authors puts it the best:

    “If an egg is broken by an outside force, life ends, but if broken by an inside force, life begins. Great things always begin from inside.”

    Developing Self-Awareness

    We are who we are with all the oddness, uniqueness, perks, and struggles. Successful people will always be aware of the tougher times as well as their reactions and behaviors to them.

    If your life has no failures or no difficult times, then there is no growth or learning. Just know that suffering is optional. Successful people might struggle to achieve their goals, but they won’t suffer because they know the difference between struggling and suffering. This difference separates success from failure.

    Trusting Your intuition

    It’s important to know when is the right time for you to take action and trust your gut to help you choose so it’s fully aligned with your purpose. Your inner voice can be your best ally. Trusting yourself will help to move forward no matter the struggles.

    Positive self-talk can motivate you in the face of a challenge and keep you focused. Here’s how to make it work for you:

    • Be realistic in your talk.
    • Find the “why” behind your talk.
    • Talk to yourself in the second person. It increases your willingness to perform and your actual performance.
    • Talk out loud. It makes you more likely to retain information and learn.

    Believing in Yourself, Your Abilities, Skills, and Drive.

    Patience goes hand in hand with self-belief as any success requires time. Impatience makes you lose concentration and gain self-doubt. Understand your strength and trust that they will provide when needed.

    Embracing Your Passion

    The passion will allow you to engage in fun so the path of success will be simple and easier. Take the time to understand your passion. It will help you at the time of difficulty.

    Being passionate about what you do gives you that inner drive so you’re willing to produce better results.

    Steve Jobs said it:

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    “Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do.”

    Practicing Self-Compassion

    It’s all about acknowledging mistakes and then forgiving yourself for them. Practicing self-compassion will help you to let go and move on from mistakes.

    A great place to start is by saying “no” more often. It’s an enforcement mechanism to uphold your boundaries, and boundaries are for meeting your needs and upholding your priorities.

    2. Goal-Setting Mindset

    Knowing what you want will motivate you to reach it. The goal has to be exciting and challenging.

    Proper goal setting is important as it will help you to hit the target without worrying about the deadline. If it doesn’t challenge you, it won’t change you. Set high goals and don’t stop until you reach them.

    Your goal is your target and the clearer you see it, the more focused you will be in your path to reach it. Living with a clear intention will help you get rid of distractions and fly straight to your goals.

    If you are clear and specific with what you want to achieve in life, you are already setting yourself up to win. You’ll do much better than most people who are blurred with their life’s purpose. If you have the sound wisdom of emotional and personal satisfaction, then it will be easy for you to achieve a goal-setting mindset.

    It is time for you to take charge of your life and create the amazing success you want by intentionally moving toward your clear goal.

    3. Learning Mindset

    If you want to succeed, you must aim for growth. Change is possible if we believe in that. Start believing in your capacity to achieve greatness, and you’ll find that everything in your life will follow suit.

    There are a couple of things I would like to point out when talking about growing through the learning process. Just because you are struggling, that doesn’t mean you’re not learning. Every failure has something to teach you, and everything you learn helps you grow.

    If you are unwilling to learn, no one can help you. If you are determined to learn, no one can stop you.

    Don’t Be Afraid to Fail

    For many, it’s the fear of failure that stops them from achieving great things. However, that can be taken care of by learning new skills, getting better at certain tasks, and developing new approaches.

    In the process of failure, consider all your mistakes as a way to grow. Sometimes, taking the risk may be scary, but remember that the more you fail, the more you will learn and grow.

    Master New Skills

    Mastering new skills can be very challenging, but you need to remember that it doesn’t happen overnight. We’re never as good as we possibly can be at a given skill as soon as we start practicing it. It takes work and time to master.

    Whenever you embark on learning a new skill, stop putting pressure on yourself. Instead, understand that you will encounter struggles. Simply focus on your learning journey, starting small, and building your skills bit by bit from there. Progress will get visible over time, which reinforces your confidence when it comes to learning.

    Be Curious

    Being curious is a great characteristic that can be developed for a success mindset. Curiosity will open your mind to the many possibilities, focusing on what can be learned. It’s a great way to practice not being attached to just one way of doing things

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    To encourage curiosity, work to quiet your inner critical voice and act despite fears. Start by asking questions: How? Why? Why not?

    According to Zimmerman, a thirst for knowledge is something that can never be quenched and should be a lifelong quest. She explained that having an endless supply of curiosity is key to seeing beyond what’s in front of you, discovering what you are truly capable of, and keeping yourself in a growth mindset.

    Get Out of Your Comfort Zone

    Getting out of your comfort zone will serve as a great learning process and help you expand. This way, you will push yourself to reach new heights and challenge your previous experiences. Those who fail to get out of their comfort zone fail to succeed. Don’t let it be you.

    Remember that a learning mindset embraces the learning process, and that includes learning from mistakes, setbacks, difficult circumstances, and failures. That means that you’ll need to ask yourself what you’re learning—even when you’ve failed.

    By doing this, you’ll be able to better identify growth opportunities and will be less likely to see setbacks and mistakes as failures. However, this is not about being overly optimizing and ignoring mistakes. It’s about noticing lessons that can be learned from everything.

    4. Challenge-Choosing Mindset

    Choosing a challenge will challenge you. It will take you out of your comfort and make you grow and expand your mindset.

    It requires courage and willingness to get challenged. However, having courage doesn’t mean being fearless. It means that you are willing to face your fears and move forward.

    Courage is like a muscle you can strengthen with use. By challenging yourself, you will always learn something new. Yes, you might fail. But in the process, you’ll learn something about yourself that you wouldn’t have done otherwise—including what you can do next time to ensure you do better.

    With a shift in mindset and practicing adopting this mindset, you can quickly expand your skills as you’re starting to approach every new challenge with enthusiasm and confidence, instead of avoidance and fear.

    Being successful means that you are different from the rest, and this is exactly what you must do to be successful. If you do what others are doing, you will get the same results as most people got.

    Dare to challenge yourself and be different, and have the courage to make a difference. To be different requires you to venture out of your comfort zone. You must constantly push yourself to new heights. You must do what is uncomfortable so that you can enjoy greater rewards later.

    5. Focused Mindset

    One of the worst setbacks that can happen on your way to success is to lose focus and allow procrastination to step in. As important as it is, it’s not always easy to be focused and disciplined. The best way is to stay in the here and now and to concentrate on everything going on in this particular moment.

    As we know very well, distractions waste time, and procrastination keeps you from moving forward. Discipline is the bridge between goals and accomplishment, and a mindset of focus builds that bridge.

    Most success does not happen overnight and if it does, it probably took longer than that. This is where a focused mindset comes in handy. Long-term commitment to reaching goals is what will help you stay focused. This is why one of the key success mindsets is your ability to focus on the long-term results.

    Hold on to your vision, and work on it relentlessly. A clear vision will help you keep your actions aligned and motivation alive.

    6. Positive Mindset

    Focusing on the positive things is one of the first things to do on your way to a success mindset. It will not only make you happier and more successful but also more full-filled. How to make that happen?

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    It’s key to fuel your mind with positive information daily and surround yourself with positive influences that can help you live your best life because positivity breeds positivity. When you adopt a positive mindset, it will start to guide everything you do. A positive frame of mind is what invites success into your life. All it takes is a few simple tweaks to your thinking to become your happiest, most fulfilled self.

    Choosing to be positive and having a good attitude will determine a lot about your life. Instead of giving yourself reasons why you can’t or shouldn’t, give yourself reasons why you can and permission to go for it. Remember that happiness doesn’t come from circumstances but always from within.

    While everything may not be good, there is definitely something good in everything. Focusing on those positive aspects will greatly help you improve your actions towards success.

    7. Abundance Mindset

    Successful people always believe that they have enough opportunities to achieve success in life. If you develop the habit of abundance mentality, then you don’t have to worry about the things that are not enough.

    The abundance mindset believes that everyone benefits and that there’s enough success for everyone. By recognizing that there’s more than enough success to go around, you can free yourself from limitations. Accepting the other’s achievements is a great habit to develop and maintain as it will create more opportunities for growth and success.

    When you believe that there is abundance and that there are unlimited opportunities around you, you will start looking for them. This is when new opportunities show up and more abundance comes your way in many different shapes or forms.

    8. Celebration Mindset

    Celebrate success. If it doesn’t come easy for you, it’s time you adopt this habit and keep it alive. It will not only allow you to resolve fears but also help you see new ways, opportunities, and possibilities for even greater growth.

    If you’re good at celebrating your success but tend to resent others’ success, then this is your chance for improvement. Acknowledging other people’s successes helps you get rid of bitterness and resentment. It allows you to focus on the positive things you have accomplished as well.

    Resentment burns your chances of success because you cannot receive what you resent. Therefore, train yourself to celebrate your success as well as others’ successes.

    From today onwards, feel proud of those who have done it, even if they are your competitors. If others can do it, tell yourself that you can do it, too. Somehow, they have just proved to you that it is possible to achieve what you want.

    Cultivating a gratitude attitude will support the mindset of celebration as it focuses on growth rather than lack. Looking for a silver lining is not naive. T’s smart and something that you should be practicing religiously.

    Another great practice to adopt a celebration mindset is to think like a winner. Too many people think they are focusing on winning when actually, they’re more focused on not losing. There’s a huge difference because when you focus on not losing, you’re thinking about risks that will stop you from trusting your intuition and stepping out of your comfort zone.

    If you’re stuck, ask yourself, “What would a winner do?” And instead of complaining and asking “why me,” get the courage and say “try me”.

    Bottom Line

    Mindset is a work of art and definitely a work in progress. It’s something you need to work on until it becomes a habit you can’t live without. Every great success requires our dedication, commitment, and willingness to stretch. Without changes, there wouldn’t be progress.

    To change your life, you must change yourself starting by developing a mindset for success. Starting from today, adapt new habits for more positive outcomes and notice how your life changes in front of your own eyes.

    To achieve success, you have to be able to trust yourself and believe in your capabilities. Success is not something that just happens but something you create.

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    You now have the knowledge and tools to change your mindset. It is your time. You are in charge. It is time to implement those eight mindsets for success step-by-step and achieve your desired results to be more wealthy, healthy, and happy. Make a conscious decision to master your mindset and reach for greater success this year and beyond.

    Featured photo credit: Henk Mul via unsplash.com

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