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Last Updated on June 16, 2020

How to Form Your Success Formula to Get Unstuck in Life

How to Form Your Success Formula to Get Unstuck in Life

Life can come as a roller coaster sometimes. It is tough to be the best version of yourself as you constantly meet with obstacles and life’s changing dynamisms. To move on to a different plateau, you may need to be more strategic and systematic in your approach to life.

I have been there. I know how it feels to get stuck and having nowhere to go. Yes, you may feel lost and don’t know how to come out from that hole. One thing I know though is that you can always get out and find a solution. It all starts with changing your thoughts and actions.

These steps are not hard but can be a simple success formula which when taken can create lasting changes in your life.

1. Be Realistic

There is nothing that can move you forward in life until you are realistic enough to admit something is broken. Everything is not okay, you don’t need to pretend or butter the truth.

You have to be completely honest with yourself, take full responsibility for your life at this point and push forward.

You have to admit that you’ve made poor decisions, you have made some mistakes and may not be working as hard as you should be. Yet, there is hope if you can be brutally honest with yourself and move forward from there.

2. Make That Choice to Be Different

Perhaps you are stuck with doing the same routine, going to the same places and being in the wrong circle. It is up to you to point your life in a new direction.

Yes, you could already be disgusted with the current one and need to do things differently. It is important for you to get fed up with the world you are in, so you can make a choice for something better. Making such decisions has a way of changing everything!

3. Look for Something You’re Really Good At

Your life may be boring in certain areas, but it doesn’t have to be boring in all areas. Y

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ou may need to shift your mindset and go back to those things you have always been fond of. When you can find such passion, you should make that decision to become better at it.

Change can be a slow process, but continually putting in the work every day could see your life change full circle.

4. Ask the Right Questions

“What could I do to be better?” “How can I make the most of your time?” “Where and when did it go wrong?” “What am I not doing right?”

You can’t take it away, asking the right questions will always lead to great answers.

You really need to be introspective when asking those questions about your life, where it is now and how you can position yourself for it to be better. The answers you get will be what leads you to finding a surer and more certain path to become happier and more successful.

You could also ask others what you are really good at and what role they see you taking on. You don’t need to simply ask anybody, ask the people who are already living the life you desire. Surely, they should be able to point you at the right direction.

At the end of the day, know that it is your duty to seek the life you desire, and perhaps asking smart questions could be what leads you there.

5. Push Your Mental Powers

Your thoughts have a way of guiding you to living the best life. You become what you think about most of the time. You shouldn’t just accept things the way they are, do something about it.

Don’t complain about how terrible your life has become, rather do something about it. Look for ways to be better at what you do.

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By thinking right and positively, you will certainly take charge of your life and respond actively to those things that happen to you.

Remember, to every setback, there is a way out. If you are failing at your career or job, you may need to gain new skills. If you are broke and do not have the money to live the best life, go out there and look for a job or learn something.

There is always a way out of that dead-end job or relationship if you constantly apply yourself to thinking.

6. Get a Mentor

It is an age-old principle of success to find yourself a mentor, someone who will act as a guide in helping you actualize your dreams.

Find someone doing well in a particular area in life, yes, you want to be like them and embrace their tutelage.

Having someone you can look up to inspires you to be better. They certainly would have a thing or two to tell you that would empower you to get out there to accomplish great things.

So go out there, look for positive role models that can certainly have a major impact in your life. Here’s how to find a mentor that fits you:

A Good Mentor Is Hard to Find: What to Look for in a Mentor

7. Be Responsible

Complaining or playing the blame game won’t take you anywhere. If you want to stop feeling stuck, you have to learn to take responsibility for your actions and where you are now.

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You don’t have to drain your energy with complaining or any negative vibe. Look at the bright side. Know that if you really act responsibly you will get out of any hole you are in.

8. Be Aware

Knowing yourself helps you win a thousand battles. Self-awareness is pivotal to living the life of your dreams. Such knowledge about yourself helps you find those things that can push you forward to great accomplishments.

Perhaps you have been talked down to or doubt yourself, think about what you could do with your life. The people talking down on you or telling you that you can’t are really not the problem – you are actually.

And if you are the problem, you can also be the solution too. When you know who you are, what you want and where you are going, no one can stop or deter you.

So study yourself, accept your role in the events of your life and see how you can better your strengths to face the challenges that would come your way. Take a look at this guide and learn how to be more self-aware:

Being Self Aware Is the Key to Success: How to Boost Self Awareness

9. Assume Total Control of Your Life

On the path to success, nothing should be left to chance. Your life is your responsibility. You are the one in the driver’s seat. You have control over the decisions you make. You also have control over how you respond to events or other people’s actions.

Certainly, there will be obstacles along the way, however you should have a guiding philosophy or ideology that will take you forward.

How you want to be is what you will be anyways. You may not be able to control a lot of factors in your life, but you can control your destiny if you assume control of your attitude, personality and aspirations.

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10. Improve Your Circle

Your circle could be a mirror of how you view the world. If you are in a negative circle that robs you of your joy and self-esteem, you are not really going to attain much.

Improve your circle of friends. Focus on quality rather than quantity. People that push you to become the best version of yourself or make you feel good about yourself shouldn’t be traded for anything in the world.

11. Get Motivated

There are a lot of audio materials and self-help books that would help you find direction even when you are lost. Such food for the soul could help you see your strengths and abilities after all.

Yes, no matter how drained and down you are, there is always something you have to offer. Motivate yourself by listening to or reading positive materials. This way you can know that others have been where you are and they survived.

Stop listening to the naysayers, start listening to those who have the “I can” spirit.

The Bottom Line

No matter how you like it or not, change is a slow process. Not everything you wish for will come all at once. But those consistent daily efforts could make a lot of difference.

It starts with accepting where you are right now and being willing to put in the work to get out of your current position.

Feeling lost is a state of mind anyways. Making those necessary changes could create a lasting change in your life and take you to the right direction after all.

Featured photo credit: Austin Pacheco via unsplash.com

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Casey Imafidon

Specialized in motivation and personal growth, providing advice to make readers fulfilled and spurred on to achieve all that they desire in life.

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Last Updated on September 18, 2020

How to Break Free From Negative Thinking for Good

How to Break Free From Negative Thinking for Good

Negative thinking can make us feel as though we are never truly good enough to change our lives. Whether we believe that we are not good looking enough, not smart enough, not funny enough, or something in between, we are always right.

We often tell ourselves the following:

“I’m not good enough to accomplish this.”

“They won’t like me. I’m too ugly to be around them.”

“I won’t ever be able to get out of this situation.”

How we see ourselves dictates how we lead our lives. This simple truth, while it is currently impacting your reality in a negative way, is actually good news. Why?

You can change your thinking, and when you can change your thoughts, you can change your reality.

Put simply, if you start to believe and feel like you are good-looking, intelligent, wealthy, or other things, you begin to see yourself in that light. If you tell yourself that you are capable of achieving greatness, you will eventually get there!

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That said, many find themselves wondering what to do when they get stuck in negative thinking. Are you tired of letting negative thinking run your life? Do you want to take control of how you feel and put yourself out there?

If you want to start writing your own narrative, let’s learn more about negative thought cycles and how you can change your own internal voice.

Where Do Negative Thoughts Come From?

You aren’t going to wake up one day and find that you are suffering from random negative thoughts. Negative thoughts are often a mix of ideas that we develop on our own, as well as ideas that we may have gotten from others.

For example, if you are constantly watching media where individuals are depicted as having thin bodies and perfect skin (and you do not have the same characteristics as those who are traditionally considered to be beautiful), you may come to the conclusion that you are not beautiful or deserving of love.

This is far from the truth, but your own take on how the world works can play into how you feel about yourself.

Equally harmful, the opinions of others can start to affect our self-perception. If several people tell you something negative about yourself, you may begin to take these opinions to heart, telling yourself the same things over time. This self-belief then becomes the model for how you live.

More often than not, the reality is that individuals who lack confidence and self-esteem are going to develop negative thought patterns.

This does not mean that confident people do not face internal crises of their own. After all, everyone is prone to experiencing a negative thought here and there. However, those who are self-aware and confident are able to bounce back from these thoughts and return to their truth.

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Those who do not think highly of themselves, on the other hand, are going to keep believing the negative thoughts that come into their mind. The issue? These negative thoughts turn into a repetitive cycle that becomes harder to break over time.

When you tell yourself something for months or years at a time, it can be difficult to transform that internal dialogue into something more positive and realistic. But is it possible? Absolutely!

The Importance of Quitting Negative Thinking

Beyond low-self esteem, there may be mental health-related causes behind your negative thought patterns, like depression. One of the major symptoms of depression is, you guessed it, negative thoughts. Depression can make us feel unworthy of love and life, even if we have everything we could wish for[1].

You may be struggling with anxiety disorders instead, which can paint uncertain visions of the future and leave you anticipating the worst long before the moment has arrived. Some people have anxiety about the present or will return to past moments where they felt as though they failed, which affects their feelings about who they are or who they will be[2].

Having mental health issues can make your situation more complex, but it is important to know that these types of health issues are highly treatable, especially with the assistance of a mental health professional. You are deserving of self-love, and getting help is the first, most important step of your journey!

How to Break the Cycle of Negative Thinking

In order to overcome your negative thought process, you are going to need two things: self-awareness and a willingness to love yourself. Once you are armed with these two tools, take a look below to learn more about how you can break free of the cycle of negative thinking.

1. Become Aware of the Thoughts That Are Affecting You

Negative thoughts are hard to catch because they have a tendency to become a part of who we are. These thoughts build our belief system and go unchallenged, even when they pop up daily.

All change begins with awareness. Whatever it is that you believe about yourself, take the time to pay attention to your own dialogue.

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What are you saying to yourself on a regular basis? How does it make you feel? Is any of it true?

 

When these thoughts are brought to your attention, you begin to notice just how often you are saying these things to yourself. Once you’ve cultivated awareness around these thoughts, you can begin to develop the change that you want.

2. Learn to Accept Them as They Come (and Move on)

A lot of people believe that you have to completely remove negative thinking patterns from your life in order to be happy. Not only is this not possible, but it’s also not true. You are going to experience negative thoughts regardless. It’s what you decide to do with these thoughts that matters.

Next time a negative thought comes into your mind, treat it like a passing car. Acknowledge it and let it pass you by. Don’t try to wave the driver over to you or continue thinking about once it has passed. Just let it go.

Giving power to your thoughts allows them to have control over you. You can’t stop a negative thought from entering your mind, but you always have the power to let it go!

3. Challenge Your Negative Thoughts

Our own beliefs play on a loop, telling us certain things over and over again. While it’s important to let go, it is also important to get to the root of these issues and figure out where they are coming from.

Let’s imagine that you are telling yourself you are stupid throughout the day. If you notice this pattern, ask yourself: Does this have any basis in reality? Am I really stupid or am I telling myself this unnecessarily? Is there any evidence to support this[3]?

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Challenge negative thinking by asking questions.

    Challenging your negative thoughts will help you realize that they are highly-exaggerated and untrue. This gives you the opportunity to transform these negative thoughts into positive ones that resonate with you.

    4. Replace These Thoughts with Kinder, More Realistic Alternatives

    Anything that is broken must be replaced. The broken record playing on a loop within you can easily be changed to a tune that you can actually sing to.

    Whenever a negative thought comes up, take the time to stop yourself and think of something positive to put in its place. If you find yourself saying, “I can’t do this,” try telling yourself that you are more than capable instead.

    Keep in mind, however, that you need to tell yourself things that you truly believe. If you start telling yourself things that don’t resonate with you and encounter a situation that proves your belief wrong, you may do more harm than good!

    Bottom Line

    Changing the way you think is a rigorous but rewarding process that will change your outlook on life. If you find yourself struggling with negative thinking, learn more about where they come from and how you can stop them for good with the guide above!

    More on How to Stop Negative Thinking

    Featured photo credit: Max Ilienerwise via unsplash.com

    Reference

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