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Why People Like Those Who Know How To Joke About Themselves

Why People Like Those Who Know How To Joke About Themselves

Who doesn’t love a good laugh every once in awhile? Watching comedy movies and joking with our friends are great ways to unwind after a stressful day. Somehow, some of the funniest jokes around are the ones that people make about themselves.

When you hear somebody joke about themselves, it’s instantly funny. Not only that, but it draws you toward the person and makes them instantly relatable. Even though comedy is a very subjective thing, there are certain steps you can take to make people laugh and get them to like you.

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“I don’t mind making jokes, but I don’t want to look like one.” – Marilyn Monroe

Sometimes, jokes are meant to make fun of other people. I’m sure you’ve laughed at more than a few of these. The truth, however, is that these jokes might hurt somebody’s feelings. If you’re hoping to be funny, don’t tell jokes that could make somebody else feel alienated.[1] That isn’t the way to get somebody to like you.

Remember, humor shouldn’t hurt somebody’s feelings. If your goal is to get people to like you by telling jokes, don’t make fun of anyone else. When you do this, you’re pointing out someone’s insecurities. Most people fight against their insecurities on a daily basis. They don’t need you to draw attention to these issues. Making fun of others is not the way to get people to like you.

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“If you want anything done well, do it yourself. This is why most people laugh at their own jokes.” – Bob Edwards

You’re probably wondering how to make jokes without using somebody else for the punchline. Easy. Use yourself! That’s right, self-deprecating humor is considered really funny by most audiences. You also have the added benefit of not making somebody else feel bad.

When you make self-deprecating jokes, your literal words are not what makes the joke funny. Instead, the subtext of your message is what makes people laugh. In other words, self-deprecating jokes get their point across indirectly. Be critical of yourself and your actions in a humorous manner, and identify something about yourself that others might find funny.

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“We need more kindness, more compassion, more joy, more laughter. I definitely want to contribute to that.” – Ellen DeGeneres

One of the funniest TV hosts is Ellen DeGeneres. She’s the best at telling jokes that make people instantly like her. According to a video by Charisma on Command, DeGeneres tends to use 3 types of jokes.[2] She uses self-deprecating humor, innocently pokes fun at others, and tries to lift people’s egos.

In short, be like Ellen DeGeneres when you’re telling jokes. When you avoid making fun of people and their insecurities, you will make more people like you. Telling innocent jokes is much more likely to get laughs out of people. Why? Because people usually aren’t insecure about temporary situations, common issues, or things that are not part of their very identity.[3]

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Other ways to be funnier include making exaggerated body movements and including games in your interactions with other people. Try to have fun and include other people in that fun, no matter what you’re doing. If you can make other people laugh, you’ll help brighten their day and make some friends along the way.

So remember, next time your want to make a joke, think it over first. Make sure that you aren’t making somebody else the butt of your humor. And if you are, make sure it isn’t by making fun of something they can’t change or something that they might feel self-conscious about. Be silly, be self-deprecating, and laugh. Laughter draws us all closer together.

Reference

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Amber Pariona

EFL Teacher, Lifehack Writer, English/Spanish Translator, MPA

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Last Updated on November 15, 2018

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

What do you think it takes to achieve your goals? Hard work? Lots of actions? While these are paramount to becoming successful in reaching our goals, neither of these are possible without a positive mindset.

As humans, we naturally tend to lean towards a negative outlook when it comes to our hopes and dreams. We are prone to believing that we have limitations either from within ourselves or from external forces keeping us from truly getting to where we want to be in life. Our tendency to think that we’ll “believe it when we see it” suggests that our mindsets are focused on our goals not really being attainable until they’ve been achieved. The problem with this is that this common mindset fuels our limiting beliefs and shows a lack of faith in ourselves.

The Success Mindset

Success in achieving our goals comes down to a ‘success mindset’. Successful mindsets are those focused on victory, based on positive mental attitudes, empowering inclinations and good habits. Acquiring a success mindset is the sure-fire way to dramatically increase your chance to achieve your goals.

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The idea that achieving our goals comes down to our habits and actions is actually a typical type of mindset that misses a crucial point; that our mindset is, in fact, the determiner of our energy and what actions we take. A negative mindset will tend to create negative actions and similarly if we have a mindset that will only set into action once we see ‘proof’ that our goals are achievable, then the road will be much longer and arduous. This is why, instead of thinking “I’ll believe it when I see it”, a success mindset will think “I’ll see it when I believe it.”

The Placebo Effect and What It Shows Us About The Power of Mindset

The placebo effect is a perfect example of how mindset really can be powerful. In scientific trials, a group of participants were told they received medication that will heal an ailment but were actually given a sugar pill that does nothing (the placebo). Yet after the trial the participants believed it’s had a positive effect – sometimes even cured their ailment even though nothing has changed. This is the power of mindset.

How do we apply this to our goals? Well, when we set goals and dreams how often do we really believe they’ll come to fruition? Have absolute faith that they can be achieved? Have a complete unwavering expectation? Most of us don’t because we hold on to negative mindsets and limiting beliefs about ourselves that stop us from fully believing we are capable or that it’s at all possible. We tend to listen to the opinions of others despite them misaligning with our own or bow to societal pressures that make us believe we should think and act a certain way. There are many reasons why we possess these types of mindsets but a success mindset can be achieved.

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How To Create a Success Mindset

People with success mindsets have a particular way of perceiving things. They have positive outlooks and are able to put faith fully in their ability to succeed. With that in mind, here are a few ways that can turn a negative mindset into a successful one.

1. A Success Mindset Comes From a Growth Mindset

How does a mindset even manifest itself? It comes from the way you talk to yourself in the privacy of your own head. Realising this will go a long way towards noticing how you speak to yourself and others around you. If it’s mainly negative language you use when you talk about your goals and aspirations then this is an example of a fixed mindset.

A negative mindset brings with it a huge number of limiting beliefs. It creates a fixed mindset – one that can’t see beyond it’s own limitations. A growth mindset sees these limitations and looks beyond them – it finds ways to overcome obstacles and believes that this will result in success. When you think of your goal, a fixed mindset may think “what if I fail?” A growth mindset would look at the same goal and think “failures happen but that doesn’t mean I won’t be successful.”

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There’s a lot of power in changing your perspective.

2. Look For The Successes

It’s really important to get your mind focused on positive aspects of your goal. Finding inspiration through others can be really uplifting and keep you on track with developing your success mindset; reinforcing your belief that your dreams can be achieved. Find people that you can talk with about how they achieved their goals and seek out and surround yourself with positive people. This is crucial if you’re learning to develop a positive mindset.

3. Eliminate Negativity

You can come up against a lot of negativity sometimes either through other people or within yourself. Understanding that other people’s negative opinions are created through their own fears and limiting beliefs will go a long way in sustaining your success mindset. But for a lot of us, negative chatter can come from within and these usually manifest as negative words such as can’t, won’t, shouldn’t. Sometimes, when we think of how we’re going to achieve our goals, statements in our minds come out as negative absolutes: ‘It never works out for me’ or ‘I always fail.’

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When you notice these coming up you need to turn them around with ‘It always works out for me!’ and ‘I never fail!’ The trick is to believe it no matter what’s happened in the past. Remember that every new day is a clean slate and for you to adjust your mindset.

4. Create a Vision

Envisioning your end goal and seeing it in your mind is an important trait of a success mindset. Allowing ourselves to imagine our success creates a powerful excitement that shouldn’t be underestimated. When our brain becomes excited at the thought of achieving our goals, we become more committed, work harder towards achieving it and more likely to do whatever it takes to make it happen.

If this involves creating a vision board that you can look at to remind yourself every day then go for it. Small techniques like this go a long way in sustaining your success mindset and shouldn’t be dismissed.

An Inspirational Story…

For centuries experts said that running a mile in under 4 minutes was humanly impossible. On the 6th May 1954, Rodger Bannister did just that. As part of his training, Bannister relentlessly visualised the achievement, believing he could accomplish what everyone said wasn’t possible…and he did it.

What’s more amazing is that, as soon as Bannister achieved the 4-minute mile, more and more people also achieved it. How was this possible after so many years of no one achieving it? Because in people’s minds it was suddenly possible – once people knew that it was achievable it created a mindset of success and now, after over fifty years since Bannister did the ‘impossible’, his record has been lowered by 17 seconds – the power of the success mindset!

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