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6 Signs You’re An Overthinking Worrier (And How To Worry Less)

6 Signs You’re An Overthinking Worrier (And How To Worry Less)

I’m very aware of the fact that I’m an over-thinker. I literally drive myself crazy sometimes worrying and thinking, and it’s usually about the littlest, dumbest things too. The fact is though, it’s just not healthy. Being aware of your over-thinking is the key to keeping it under control and keeping yourself sane. Here are 6 signs that you may be an over-thinker and tips on how to stop worrying so much!

1. You have trouble falling asleep

Your body is tired, but you find yourself tossing and turning. We are all culprits of it- thinking about the day’s occurrences, or worrying about what tomorrow will bring, and not getting enough sleep will only makes matters worse.

Meditation, even in its’ simplest form, will help clear our minds. Take a few moments to lie in bed and focus on the good things that occurred that day. Be thankful for those good things. Think about the funny joke you heard on your lunch break, or the dinner your spouse cooked so you didn’t have to. Tell yourself that you are going to let go of the worry for right now. Tell yourself that tomorrow is a new day and you are going to make the best of it. The power of relaxation and positive thinking will help to ease your mind and allow a good night’s rest.

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2. You wake up to worry

So you’ve manage to fall asleep and make it through the night, but now it’s morning. You’ve barely rolled over and already worry pops into your head. Waking up to heavy, stressful thoughts is the worst way to start your day, and many people will agree that a bad morning will make for an entire bad day.

Much like #1, don’t get out of bed until you’ve given yourself a pep talk. Let your body lie still for a few moments and tell yourself that it’s going to be a great day. Tell yourself that you can handle the challenges that the day may bring. Take notice of the sunlight peeking through your curtains. Focus for a moment on the birds chirping outside or the sound of your children waking in the background. Decide right then and there to not carry these worrisome thoughts around the entire day.

3. You’re often emotional or angry

You have a hard time making it through the day without a meltdown and overflow of tears. You find yourself just snapping and the littlest things and overreacting like an emotional train wreck. Sounds like you need some ‘me’ time!

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Fit some time into your schedule to pamper and take care of yourself in the ways that make you most relaxed and happy. If you enjoy nature, get out for a walk. Buy the new dress or boots you’ve been wanting. Treat yourself to a triple scoop ice cream cone. Allow yourself to cry over sad songs if that’s what you need. Get in touch with your best friend; you know that guy or gal can always make you laugh! Maintain regular visits with a therapist if expert advice is required.

4. You blame yourself

Your daughter failed her test because you forgot to help her study the night before. Your spouse didn’t have breakfast that morning because you overslept. There are no clean bath towels because you neglected to keep up on laundry. Cavity? Because you didn’t floss enough. Out of milk? Because you were too lazy to run to the store.

You cannot carry the weight of the world on your shoulders! We are human. We make mistakes. We are only capable of handling so much at one time. Perhaps it’s time to delegate tasks to other family members to help ease your worries. You do a lot, but can’t do it all, and instead of blaming yourself for things gone wrong, pat yourself on the back for things gone right.

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5. You scrutinize people’s words and facial expressions

You walk away from the cashier’s checkout line wondering if he was looking at you funny. You thought for sure that couple behind you was laughing at your shoes. You could swear that the lady was just being sarcastic when she complimented your hair.

Nine times out of ten, it’s just in our heads. Don’t let these little insecurities get in your way. We shouldn’t worry ourselves thinking about some ‘hidden agenda’ in everyone’s comments or facial expressions. Whether the lady’s compliment was genuine or not, smile and say “thank you”, and then let it go. Don’t let your thoughts stray any more than that. Besides, your hair was looking pretty rad that day!

6. Your thoughts are consumed by bills

Unless you’re a recent lottery winner, it would be fair to say that most of us worry about bills. Let’s face it, bills suck, but they are a part of a life. They come every month and worrying about them won’t make them go away.

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Maybe it’s time to sit down and rewrite your budget plan. Maybe it’s time to rethink what’s really necessary and try to eliminate the things that aren’t. Perhaps a temporary part-time job is needed to help pay a few things off. Sometimes even calling the companies to get an extension or set up on a payment plan will help to ease your worries.

Over-thinking and worrying to some extent is normal human nature. Life isn’t always easy and we all at some point have too much on our plate. We need to recognize our worries and be conscious of ways to ease them. Find ways that work best for you on how to stop worrying so much and practice them regularly. It will help you to maintain good health, a clear mind, and a loving heart.  

Featured photo credit: http://i.huffpost.com/gen/1514502/thumbs/o-STRESSED-WORRIED-WOMAN-STOCK-THINKSTOCK-OWN-facebook.jpg via i.huffpost.com

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Last Updated on April 14, 2021

How to Deal With Anger (The Ultimate Anger Management Guide)

How to Deal With Anger (The Ultimate Anger Management Guide)

We all lose our temper from time to time, and expressing anger is actually a healthy thing to do in our relationships with others. Expressing our differences in opinion allows us to have healthy conflict and many times come to an agreement or understanding that works for everyone. However, there are times when anger can become overwhelming or damaging, and during these times, it’s important to learn how to deal with anger.

Expressing anger inappropriately can be harmful to relationships, both personal and professional. You may express too much anger, too often, or at times that are only going to make things worse, not better. In this article we will look at anger management techniques that will help you better control your emotions.

Let’s take a deeper look at how to deal with anger.

Expressing Anger

Anger is a natural and normal part of almost any relationship. This includes relationships with your significant other, kids, boss, friends, family, etc. Anger provides us with valuable information if we are willing to listen to it. It clues us in to areas where we disagree with others and things that need to be changed or altered.

Unhealthy Ways to Express Anger

Here are some common yet unhealthy ways to express anger that you should avoid:

Being Passive-Aggressive

This is a term many of us are familiar with. Passive-aggressive behavior happens when someone is angry but uses indirect communication to express their anger.

Some of the more common passive-aggressive behaviors include the silent treatment, making comments about someone behind their back, being grumpy, moody, or pouting, or simply not doing tasks or assignments that they should.

This is a passive-aggressive person’s way of showing their anger. It’s not very productive but extremely common.

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Poorly-Timed

Some people get overwhelmed and express anger in a situation where it can’t really do any good.

An example would be getting angry at one person in front of a crowd of people. All that does is make people uncomfortable and shuts them down. It’s not a healthy way to express anger or disagreement with someone.

Ongoing Anger

Being angry all the time is most often a symptom of something else. It’s healthy and normal to express anger when you disagree with someone. However, if someone is angry most of the time and always seems to be expressing their anger to everyone around them, this won’t serve them well.

Over time, people will start to avoid this person and have as little contact as possible. The reason being is no one likes being around someone who is angry all the time; it’s a no-win situation.

Healthy Ways to Express Anger

What about the healthy ways[1] to adapt? When learning how to deal with anger, here are some healthy ways to get you started.

Being Honest

Express your anger or disagreement honestly. Be truthful about what it is that is making you angry. Sometimes this will entail walking away and thinking about it for a bit before you respond.

Don’t say you’re mad at something someone did or said when it’s really something else that upset you.

Being Direct

Similar to being honest, being direct is a healthy way to express anger.

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Don’t talk around something that is making you angry. Don’t say that one thing is making you angry when it’s really something else, and don’t stack items on top of each other so you can unload on someone about 10 different things 6 months from now.

Be direct and upfront about what is making you angry. Ensure you are expressing your anger to the person who upset you or you are angry at, not to someone else. This is very counterproductive.

Being Timely

When something makes you angry, it’s much better to express it in a timely manner. Don’t keep it bottled up inside of you, as that’s only going to do more harm than good.

Think of the marriages that seem to go up in flames out of nowhere when the reality is someone kept quiet for years until they hit their breaking point.

Expressing anger as it occurs is a much healthier way of using anger to help us guide our relationships in the moment.

How to Deal With Anger

If you feel angry, how should you deal with it right at that moment?

1. Slow Down

From time to time, I receive an email at work that makes me so angry that steam is probably pouring out of my ears.

In my less restrained moments, I have been known to fire off a quick response, and that typically has ended about as well as you might imagine.

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When I actually walk away from my computer and go do something else for a while, I am able to calm down and think more rationally. After that happens, I am able to respond in a more appropriate and productive manner. Doing things that helps you learn how to release anger can make an uncomfortable situation more manageable before it gets out of hand.

2. Focus on the “I”

Remember that you are the one that’s upset. Don’t accuse people of making you upset because, in the end, it’s your response to what someone did that really triggered your anger. You don’t want to place blame by saying something like “Why don’t you ever put away your dishes?” Say something more like “Having dirty dishes laying on the counter upsets me—can you work with me to come to a solution?”

When you are accusatory towards someone, all that does is increase the tension. This doesn’t usually do anything except make your anger rise higher.

3. Work out

When learning how to deal with anger, exercise is a great outlet. If something happens that angers you, see if you have the opportunity to burn off some of the anger.

Being able to hit the gym to get a hard workout in is great. If this isn’t an option, see if you can go for a run or a bike ride. If you are at work when you become angry and the weather permits, at least go outside for a brisk walk.

Besides working some of your anger out through exercise, this also helps to give your mind a chance to work through some ways to address what it is that upset you.

If you’re not sure where to start with an exercise routine, check out Lifehack’s free Simple Cardio Home Workout Plan.

4. Seek Help When Needed

There are times when we could all use some help. Life can be stressful and overwhelming. It’s perfectly fine to seek some help from a mental health professional if it will help you get back to a healthy balance.If you find that you are angry all the time, it might be a good idea to go talk to an expert about learning to control intense emotions. They can give you some sound advice and ideas on how to get your anger to a more manageable and healthy level.

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5. Practice Relaxation

We all seem to lead incredibly busy lives, and that’s a good thing if we are loving the life we are living. That being said, it is very beneficial to our physical and mental well-being to take time out for relaxation.

That can mean spending time doing things that help us calm down and relax, like being around people we enjoy, practicing deep breathing or listening to music. It could be making time for things that help bring us balance like a healthy diet and physical activity.

Many people incorporate techniques such as yoga and meditation to calm their minds and release tension when learning how to deal with anger. Whatever your choice is, ensure you take time out to relax when warning signs of anger start to bubble up.

6. Laugh

Incorporating humor and laughter on a regular basis will help keep anger in check and help you get over a bad mood and feelings of anger more quickly. This isn’t part of formal anger management techniques, but you’ll be surprised by how well it works. Remember, life is a journey that’s meant to be enjoyed fully along the way through healthy emotion. Make sure you take time to laugh and have fun.Surround yourself with people that like to laugh and enjoy life. Don’t work at a job that just causes you stress, which can lead to anger. Work at something you enjoy doing.

7. Be Grateful

It’s easy to focus on the bad in life and the things that cause us negative emotions. It’s vitally important to remind ourselves of all the wonderful things in life that bring us positive emotions, things that we easily forget because we get caught up in the whirlwind of day to day life.

Take time out each day to remind yourself of a few things you are grateful for in order to help you learn how to release anger and invite in more positive feelings.

Final Thoughts

Life can be overwhelming at times. We seem to have constant pressure to achieve more and to always be on the go. People we are around and situations we are in can cause stress, anger, and negative emotions. At times, it can seem to be too much, and we get angry and our emotions start to get out of control.

During these times, keep in mind that life is an incredible journey, full of wonder and things that bring you joy. When you find yourself angry more often than is healthy, take time out to remember the good things in life—the things that we seem to forget yet bring us so much positive energy and emotions.

Use some of the tips included here to help with how to deal with anger and better control your emotions.

More Resources on Anger Management

Featured photo credit: Andre Hunter via unsplash.com

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