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Having A Difficult Conversation? Here Are 5 Tips To Make It A Breeze

Having A Difficult Conversation? Here Are 5 Tips To Make It A Breeze

We all face the prospect of having a difficult conversation every now and then. It may be talking to your partner about a sensitive topic, or confronting family and friends about things that make you unhappy. Maybe you need to have a difficult talk with your child’s school teacher, or you need to confront a neighbor about an issue. It may even be just negotiating your way out of a difficult situation or asking for a pay rise that is a challenge for you to discuss.

When we are alone, we know all the things that we want to say, but once we are faced with the moment of truth, it is easy to clam up and lose what could be an excellent opportunity to resolve an unpleasant situation.

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Here are 5 tips for making difficult conversations a breeze.

1. Make A List

Is the conversation even worth having? Sometimes we react emotionally to a situation and need some time to reflect on the problem before shooting our mouth off. Making a list of things about how the conversation will improve the situation may show us if it is in fact going to make the issue better or worse.

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2. Calm Down

Taking some time to assess the problem will allow you to stabilize your emotions. The best way to have a difficult conversation is to be level-headed and pragmatic. There is no point confronting someone when you are angry or upset. You can still communicate those feelings to them without making a scene and sabotaging the process of resolution.

3. Perfect Timing

It is best to have a difficult conversation with someone when you can both have discretion and give each other your full attention. If you are going to be distracted and interrupted, the message and possible solution is going to get lost in the chaos. You have all the time in the world. Don’t rush it. Pick your moment.

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4. Be Assertive

Being assertive is not being aggressive, it’s being strong enough to stick to your argument and making sure you have your say. If you are interrupted and the person becomes defensive – wait. Give them the time to have their say, but then return to your own point of view. Assertive also does not mean stubborn. Sometimes, people have a valid reason for their behavior. Being open to change your mind and understand another person’s experience doesn’t make you weak; actually, it makes you the bigger person.

5. Take The Small Wins

Having a difficult conversation will not always give you the outcome you envisioned. It’s not about winning or losing. It’s about communicating your feelings and perspective, and hopefully doing things better next time. A difficult conversation is always worth having, even if it is just to get things off your chest.

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Featured photo credit: quotesgram.com via quotesgram.com

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Diane Koopman

Writer, Author, Novelist, Self-Publisher

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Last Updated on September 20, 2018

7 Powerful Questions To Find Out What You Want To Do With Your Life

7 Powerful Questions To Find Out What You Want To Do With Your Life

What do I want to do with my life? It’s a question all of us think about at one point or another.

For some, the answer comes easily. For others, it takes a lifetime to figure out.

It’s easy to just go through the motions and continue to do what’s comfortable and familiar. But for those of you who seek fulfillment, who want to do more, these questions will help you paint a clearer picture of what you want to do with your life.

1. What are the things I’m most passionate about?

The first step to living a more fulfilling life is to think about the things that you’re passionate about.

What do you love? What fulfills you? What “work” do you do that doesn’t feel like work? Maybe you enjoy writing, maybe you love working with animals or maybe you have a knack for photography.

The point is, figure out what you love doing, then do more of it.

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2. What are my greatest accomplishments in life so far?

Think about your past experiences and the things in your life you’re most proud of.

How did those accomplishments make you feel? Pretty darn good, right? So why not try and emulate those experiences and feelings?

If you ran a marathon once and loved the feeling you had afterwards, start training for another one. If your child grew up to be a star athlete or musician because of your teachings, then be a coach or mentor for other kids.

Continue to do the things that have been most fulfilling for you.

3. If my life had absolutely no limits, what would I choose to have and what would I choose to do?

Here’s a cool exercise: Think about what you would do if you had no limits.

If you had all the money and time in the world, where would you go? What would you do? Who would you spend time with?

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These answers can help you figure out what you want to do with your life. It doesn’t mean you need millions of dollars to be happy though.

What it does mean is answering these questions will help you set goals to reach certain milestones and create a path toward happiness and fulfillment. Which leads to our next question …

4. What are my goals in life?

Goals are a necessary component to set you up for a happy future. So answer these questions:

Once you figure out the answers to each of these, you’ll have a much better idea of what you should do with your life.

5. Whom do I admire most in the world?

Following the path of successful people can set you up for success.

Think about the people you respect and admire most. What are their best qualities? Why do you respect them? What can you learn from them?

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You’re the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with.[1] So don’t waste your time with people who hold you back from achieving your dreams.

Spend more time with happy, successful, optimistic people and you’ll become one of them.

6. What do I not like to do?

An important part of figuring out what you want to do with your life is honestly assessing what you don’t want to do.

What are the things you despise? What bugs you the most about your current job?

Maybe you hate meetings even though you sit through 6 hours of them every day. If that’s the case, find a job where you can work more independently.

The point is, if you want something to change in your life, you need to take action. Which leads to our final question …

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7. How hard am I willing to work to get what I want?

Great accomplishments never come easy. If you want to do great things with your life, you’re going to have to make a great effort. That will probably mean putting in more hours the average person, getting outside your comfort zone and learning as much as you can to achieve as much as you can.

But here’s the cool part: it’s often the journey that is the most fulfilling part. It’s during these seemingly small, insignificant moments that you’ll often find that “aha” moments that helps you answer the question,

“What do I want to do with my life?”

So take the first step toward improving your life. You won’t regret it.

Featured photo credit: Andrew Ly via unsplash.com

Reference

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