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7 Ways to Deal With Your Child’s Tantrums

7 Ways to Deal With Your Child’s Tantrums

Toddlers and temper tantrums are something that go together. The child is attempting to express their outrage at a complex world through these radioactive-like “melt-downs.” Parents are tasked with remaining calm and patient during these episodes. The toddler is striving toward a sense of independence, yet is far to young to understand that their safety may be at risk. What’s a parent to do? There are proven methods to redirect or distract the child without being punitive. These tips will help a parent get through these tumultuous years, only to face them once more throughout puberty.

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1. Stop it before it starts.

Let the child know ahead of time what is going to happen. “Bedtime is in ten minutes.” or “You can have one more turn before dinner time.” In this way, the child is able to anticipate an event without being surprised by it. Talk with the child throughout an activity. For example, discuss the items that are being shopped for, what is for dinner, or the child’s day. In this way the toddler has more things to think about than becoming angry or frustrated.

2. Distract. Distract. Distract.

 

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    Fortunately, very young children are easily distracted. Put some rice or beans in a Pringles© can, replace the lid, and let the child shake it. Give the child a wooden spoon and pots and pans to bang on for a while. Flip through a magazine and point out the bright pictures. A picture book serves as a great, quiet distraction. Give the child a warm, relaxing bubble path and engage in water play. Take a nature stroll around the backyard.

    3. Provide simple choices.

    Letting a child make their own choices helps them feel more independent and in control. Limit the choices to only two things. Ask, “Would you like to wear the red or the blue shoes today?” The choice to go barefoot has not been provided as an option. Or say, “Do you want milk or apple juice for lunch today?” This eliminates soda as a choice. Instead of asking if he or she wants to wear shoes or a drink for lunch, be specific and limit the child’s options.

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    4. Stay calm and take a breath.

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      Dealing with a rising temper tantrum is difficult for any parent. Breathe and count to ten before confronting the issue. If a parent is upset, the child can pick up on the emotion and become easily frustrated. When it is safe, simply walk out of the room or walk outside. It may be preferable to place the child in his or her crib for a few moments, so you can collect yourself and calmly deal with the situation.

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      5. Allow the child to cry out.

      Letting the child simply cry out his or her frustrations is a kind of release valve in this situation. This is especially true when the tantrum has not been stopped in time. Sometimes it is simply best to ignore the child and allow him or her to cry out the anger and frustration. Stay in the room, but walk a few feet away while refraining from making eye contact. You might try not talking to the child until the tantrum is over and then engage the child in an enjoyable activity.

      6. Give a hug.

      While it is possible that your toddler may be engaged in some unlovable behavior, a firm hug may be just the thing. Scientists say that a hug helps the child feel more in control. The step helps the child feel better in a time when they may be feeling powerless and unhappy. A simple hug is also a way to let the child know that it’s okay to get upset sometimes.

      7. Offer a snack.

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        Being hungry or tired are at the top the list for a toddler having a blow-out. Provide a fruit cup, yogurt, or other healthy snack and allow the child to eat quietly. It’s a kind of time-out for both parent and child, as the child is allowed a little space to breathe or think things through. Often dealing with a temper tantrum need not be drawn out or complicated.

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        Last Updated on March 13, 2019

        How to Get out of a Rut: 12 Useful Ways to Get Unstuck

        How to Get out of a Rut: 12 Useful Ways to Get Unstuck

        Have you gotten into a rut before? Or are you in a rut right now?

        You know you’re in a rut when you run out of ideas and inspiration. I personally see a rut as a productivity vacuum. It might very well be a reason why you aren’t getting results. Even as you spend more time on your work, you can’t seem to get anything constructive done. While I’m normally productive, I get into occasional ruts (especially when I’ve been working back-to-back without rest). During those times, I can spend an entire day in front of the computer and get nothing done. It can be quite frustrating.

        Over time, I have tried and found several methods that are helpful to pull me out of a rut. If you experience ruts too, whether as a working professional, a writer, a blogger, a student or other work, you will find these useful. Here are 12 of my personal tips to get out of ruts:

        1. Work on the small tasks.

        When you are in a rut, tackle it by starting small. Clear away your smaller tasks which have been piling up. Reply to your emails, organize your documents, declutter your work space, and reply to private messages.

        Whenever I finish doing that, I generate a positive momentum which I bring forward to my work.

        2. Take a break from your work desk.

        Get yourself away from your desk and go take a walk. Go to the washroom, walk around the office, go out and get a snack.

        Your mind is too bogged down and needs some airing. Sometimes I get new ideas right after I walk away from my computer.

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        3. Upgrade yourself

        Take the down time to upgrade yourself. Go to a seminar. Read up on new materials (#7). Pick up a new language. Or any of the 42 ways here to improve yourself.

        The modern computer uses different typefaces because Steve Jobs dropped in on a calligraphy class back in college. How’s that for inspiration?

        4. Talk to a friend.

        Talk to someone and get your mind off work for a while.

        Talk about anything, from casual chatting to a deep conversation about something you really care about. You will be surprised at how the short encounter can be rejuvenating in its own way.

        5. Forget about trying to be perfect.

        If you are in a rut, the last thing you want to do is step on your own toes with perfectionist tendencies.

        Just start small. Do what you can, at your own pace. Let yourself make mistakes.

        Soon, a little trickle of inspiration will come. And then it’ll build up with more trickles. Before you know it, you have a whole stream of ideas.

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        6. Paint a vision to work towards.

        If you are continuously getting in a rut with your work, maybe there’s no vision inspiring you to move forward.

        Think about why you are doing this, and what you are doing it for. What is the end vision in mind?

        Make it as vivid as possible. Make sure it’s a vision that inspires you and use that to trigger you to action.

        7. Read a book (or blog).

        The things we read are like food to our brain. If you are out of ideas, it’s time to feed your brain with great materials.

        Here’s a list of 40 books you can start off with. Stock your browser with only the feeds of high quality blogs, such as Lifehack.org, DumbLittleMan, Seth Godin’s Blog, Tim Ferris’ Blog, Zen Habits or The Personal Excellence Blog.

        Check out the best selling books; those are generally packed with great wisdom.

        8. Have a quick nap.

        If you are at home, take a quick nap for about 20-30 minutes. This clears up your mind and gives you a quick boost. Nothing quite like starting off on a fresh start after catching up on sleep.

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        9. Remember why you are doing this.

        Sometimes we lose sight of why we do what we do, and after a while we become jaded. A quick refresher on why you even started on this project will help.

        What were you thinking when you thought of doing this? Retrace your thoughts back to that moment. Recall why you are doing this. Then reconnect with your muse.

        10. Find some competition.

        Nothing quite like healthy competition to spur us forward. If you are out of ideas, then check up on what people are doing in your space.

        Colleagues at work, competitors in the industry, competitors’ products and websites, networking conventions.. you get the drill.

        11. Go exercise.

        Since you are not making headway at work, might as well spend the time shaping yourself up.

        Sometimes we work so much that we neglect our health and fitness. Go jog, swim, cycle, whichever exercise you prefer.

        As you improve your physical health, your mental health will improve, too. The different facets of ourselves are all interlinked.

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        Here’re 15 Tips to Restart the Exercise Habit (and How to Keep It).

        12. Take a good break.

        Ruts are usually signs that you have been working too long and too hard. It’s time to get a break.

        Beyond the quick tips above, arrange for a 1-day or 2-days of break from your work. Don’t check your (work) emails or do anything work-related. Relax and do your favorite activities. You will return to your work recharged and ready to start.

        Contrary to popular belief, the world will not end from taking a break from your work. In fact, you will be much more ready to make an impact after proper rest. My best ideas and inspiration always hit me whenever I’m away from my work.

        Take a look at this to learn the importance of rest: The Importance of Scheduling Downtime

        More Resources About Getting out of a Rut

        Featured photo credit: Joshua Earle via unsplash.com

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