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7 Ways to Deal With Your Child’s Tantrums

7 Ways to Deal With Your Child’s Tantrums

Toddlers and temper tantrums are something that go together. The child is attempting to express their outrage at a complex world through these radioactive-like “melt-downs.” Parents are tasked with remaining calm and patient during these episodes. The toddler is striving toward a sense of independence, yet is far to young to understand that their safety may be at risk. What’s a parent to do? There are proven methods to redirect or distract the child without being punitive. These tips will help a parent get through these tumultuous years, only to face them once more throughout puberty.

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1. Stop it before it starts.

Let the child know ahead of time what is going to happen. “Bedtime is in ten minutes.” or “You can have one more turn before dinner time.” In this way, the child is able to anticipate an event without being surprised by it. Talk with the child throughout an activity. For example, discuss the items that are being shopped for, what is for dinner, or the child’s day. In this way the toddler has more things to think about than becoming angry or frustrated.

2. Distract. Distract. Distract.

 

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    Fortunately, very young children are easily distracted. Put some rice or beans in a Pringles© can, replace the lid, and let the child shake it. Give the child a wooden spoon and pots and pans to bang on for a while. Flip through a magazine and point out the bright pictures. A picture book serves as a great, quiet distraction. Give the child a warm, relaxing bubble path and engage in water play. Take a nature stroll around the backyard.

    3. Provide simple choices.

    Letting a child make their own choices helps them feel more independent and in control. Limit the choices to only two things. Ask, “Would you like to wear the red or the blue shoes today?” The choice to go barefoot has not been provided as an option. Or say, “Do you want milk or apple juice for lunch today?” This eliminates soda as a choice. Instead of asking if he or she wants to wear shoes or a drink for lunch, be specific and limit the child’s options.

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    4. Stay calm and take a breath.

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      Dealing with a rising temper tantrum is difficult for any parent. Breathe and count to ten before confronting the issue. If a parent is upset, the child can pick up on the emotion and become easily frustrated. When it is safe, simply walk out of the room or walk outside. It may be preferable to place the child in his or her crib for a few moments, so you can collect yourself and calmly deal with the situation.

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      5. Allow the child to cry out.

      Letting the child simply cry out his or her frustrations is a kind of release valve in this situation. This is especially true when the tantrum has not been stopped in time. Sometimes it is simply best to ignore the child and allow him or her to cry out the anger and frustration. Stay in the room, but walk a few feet away while refraining from making eye contact. You might try not talking to the child until the tantrum is over and then engage the child in an enjoyable activity.

      6. Give a hug.

      While it is possible that your toddler may be engaged in some unlovable behavior, a firm hug may be just the thing. Scientists say that a hug helps the child feel more in control. The step helps the child feel better in a time when they may be feeling powerless and unhappy. A simple hug is also a way to let the child know that it’s okay to get upset sometimes.

      7. Offer a snack.

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        Being hungry or tired are at the top the list for a toddler having a blow-out. Provide a fruit cup, yogurt, or other healthy snack and allow the child to eat quietly. It’s a kind of time-out for both parent and child, as the child is allowed a little space to breathe or think things through. Often dealing with a temper tantrum need not be drawn out or complicated.

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        Last Updated on June 20, 2019

        Science Says Guitar Players’ Brains Are Different From Others’

        Science Says Guitar Players’ Brains Are Different From Others’

        There’s nothing quite like picking up a guitar and strumming out some chords. Listening to someone playing the guitar can be mesmerising, it can evoke emotion and a good guitar riff can bring out the best of a song. Many guitar players find a soothing, meditative quality to playing, along with the essence of creating music or busting out an acoustic version of their favourite song. But how does playing the guitar affect the brain?

        More and more scientific studies have been looking into how people who play the guitar have different brain functions compared to those who don’t. What they found was quite astonishing and backed up what many guitarists may instinctively know deep down.

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        Guitar Players’ Brains Can Synchronise

        You didn’t read that wrong! Yes, a 2012 study[1] was conducted in Berlin that looked at the brains of guitar players. The researchers took 12 pairs of players and got them to play the same piece of music while having their brains scanned.

        During the experiment, they found something extraordinary happening to each pair of participants – their brains were synchronising with each other. So what does this mean? Well, the neural networks found in the areas of the brain associated with social cognition and music production were most activated when the participants were playing their instruments. In other words, their ability to connect with each other while playing music was exceptionally strong.

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        Guitar Players Have a Higher Intuition

        Intuition is described as “the ability to understand something instinctively, without the need for conscious reasoning” and this is exactly what’s happening when two people are playing the guitar together.

        The ability to synchronise their brains with each other, stems from this developed intuitive talent indicating that guitar players have a definite spiritual dexterity to them. Not only do their brains synchronise with another player, but they can also even anticipate what is to come before and after a set of chords without consciously knowing. This explains witnessing a certain ‘chemistry’ between players in a band and why many bands include brothers who may have an even stronger connection.

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        This phenomenon is actually thought to be down to the way guitarists learn how to play – while many musicians learn through reading sheet music, guitar players learn more from listening to others play and feeling their way through the chords. This also shows guitarists have exceptional improvisational skills[2] and quick thinking.

        Guitar Players Use More of Their Creative, Unconscious Brain

        The same study carried out a different experiment, this time while solo guitarists were shredding. They found that experienced guitar players were found to deactivate the conscious part of their brain extremely easily meaning they were able to activate the unconscious, creative and less practical way of thinking more efficiently.

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        This particular area of the brain – the right temporoparietal junction – typically deactivates with ‘long term goal orientation’ in order to stop distractions to get goals accomplished. This was in contrast to the non-guitarists who were unable to shut off the conscious part of their brain which meant they were consciously thinking more about what they were playing.

        This isn’t to say that this unconscious way of playing can’t be learnt. Since the brain’s plasticity allows new connections to be made depending on repeated practice, the guitar player’s brain can be developed over time but it’s something about playing the guitar in particular that allows this magic to happen.

        Conclusion

        While we all know musicians have very quick and creative brains, it seems guitar players have that extra special something. Call it heightened intuition or even a spiritual element – either way, it’s proven that guitarists are an exceptional breed unto themselves!

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        Featured photo credit: Lechon Kirb via unsplash.com

        Reference

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