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The 6 Simplest Ways To Free Yourself

The 6 Simplest Ways To Free Yourself

Are you at a place where all you need is a lifeline? A little freedom? Are you saying, “Calgon, take me away!” Believe me, I know the feeling. We can do so much for so many and still feel bound in chains to the world, to our surroundings, to our circumstances, and even to ourselves. Isn’t it time to free yourself? Just doing even a couple of these below will put you on the path to freedom… to just be.

1. Evaluate your self-worth.

Your self-worth has everything to do with how you see yourself, the places you visit, and the overall relationships you cultivate. If you have low self-worth, you will begin to attract people who also care nothing about themselves nor the people they hurt. However, if you value who you are and what you do, others will too. You will find yourself more apt to do what comes naturally to you while around them. You will enjoy yourself more because you are free to laugh, connect, and talk about what matters most to you and others will feel free to do the same.

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2. Be an original.

For some, this goes without saying. But for others, this will take some time. All of us want to feel like we matter. But it shouldn’t be for the sake of doing things that others do to fit in. That can jeopardize your character and make you a fake and a phony. Just be yourself. As they always say, “An original is better than its copy.”

3. Forgive yourself and others.

Can you say within your heart of hearts that you have no animosity towards anything or anyone? Just think for a minute. Someone cuts you off on the road and you had to give them a piece of your mind. Or someone said they would do something for you, and they never did it. Or better yet, a dear friend of yours spilled the beans on something you’ve recently discussed in private and you swore him or her to secrecy. Yes, it made you upset, but was it that bad no not forgive them? The art of forgiveness is a learned behavior that once utilized can be liberating to say the least. It makes you look at life differently and makes you realize “it really wasn’t that serious.”

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4. Learn to say no.

I know this one may be hard for some of you, but it is essential that you learn to say it for your own sanity. Not everyone will agree when you say no, nor will they like it. But who’s life is it anyway? The decisions you make ultimately affect you. Make sure those decisions make you feel comfortable and help you be effective in what you’ve been called to do. People will learn to respect you more by being honest and just saying no.

5. Control your reaction to things.

This one is extremely serious business. Many of us, with or without knowing it, assume the worst in people. Social media is one of the biggest places for this to happen. Imagine going to your inbox and seeing someone write something to you that disturbs you. Your first reaction is to take it the wrong way and lash back at them as a way of retaliation. However, you never tried to find out what the person was really trying to say or their emotions behind the message. Phone calls have almost become a thing of the past with some people, as texting and messaging has become the norm. But so much would be avoided if you would only control your reactions to it and find out more. Save your relationship and you free yourself from unnecessary heartache.

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6. Love yourself.

Be free to love everything about you. Your strengths, your flaws-as many or as little as they are-are still a part of you. Once you come to love who you are, you can then be free to love others. Be vulnerable to love. Your freedom is yours to explore. Make the best of the journey!

 

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Featured photo credit: Sunset Girl via s3.amazonaws.com

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Last Updated on January 18, 2019

7 Ways To Deal With Negative People

7 Ways To Deal With Negative People

Some people will have a rain cloud hanging over them, no matter what the weather is outside. Their negative attitude is toxic to your own moods, and you probably feel like there is little you can do about it.

But that couldn’t be farther from the truth.

If you want to effectively deal with negative people and be a champion of positivity, then your best route is to take definite action through some of the steps below.

1. Limit the time you spend with them.

First, let’s get this out of the way. You can be more positive than a cartoon sponge, but even your enthusiasm has a chance of being afflicted by the constant negativity of a friend.

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In fact, negativity has been proven to damage your health physically, making you vulnerable to high levels of stress and even cardiac disease. There’s no reason to get hurt because of someone else’s bad mood.

Though this may be a little tricky depending on your situation, working to spend slightly less time around negative people will keep your own spirits from slipping as well.

2. Speak up for yourself.

Don’t just absorb the comments that you are being bombarded with, especially if they are about you. It’s wise to be quick to listen and slow to speak, but being too quiet can give the person the impression that you are accepting what’s being said.

3. Don’t pretend that their behavior is “OK.”

This is an easy trap to fall into. Point out to the person that their constant negativity isn’t a good thing. We don’t want to do this because it’s far easier to let someone sit in their woes, and we’d rather just stay out of it.

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But if you want the best for this person, avoid giving the false impression that their negativity is normal.

4. Don’t make their problems your problems.

Though I consider empathy a gift, it can be a dangerous thing. When we hear the complaints of a friend or family member, we typically start to take on their burdens with them.

This is a bad habit to get into, especially if this is a person who is almost exclusively negative. These types of people are prone to embellishing and altering a story in order to gain sympathy.

Why else would they be sharing this with you?

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5. Change the subject.

When you suspect that a conversation is starting to take a turn for the negative, be a champion of positivity by changing the subject. Of course, you have to do this without ignoring what the other person said.

Acknowledge their comment, but move the conversation forward before the euphoric pleasure gained from complaining takes hold of either of you.

6. Talk about solutions, not problems.

Sometimes, changing the subject isn’t an option if you want to deal with negative people, but that doesn’t mean you can’t still be positive.

I know that when someone begins dumping complaints on me, I have a hard time knowing exactly what to say. The key is to measure your responses as solution-based.

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You can do this by asking questions like, “Well, how could this be resolved?” or, “How do you think they feel about it?”

Use discernment to find an appropriate response that will help your friend manage their perspectives.

7. Leave them behind.

Sadly, there are times when we have to move on without these friends, especially if you have exhausted your best efforts toward building a positive relationship.

If this person is a family member, you can still have a functioning relationship with them, of course, but you may still have to limit the influence they have over your wellbeing.

That being said, what are some steps you’ve taken to deal with negative people? Let us know in the comments.

You may also want to read: How to Stop the Negative Spin of Thoughts, Emotions and Actions.

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