Finding the right way to listen to yourself so that you can make the best choice when facing a tough decision sometimes proves to be a really difficult task. More often than not, people tell you to calm down, breathe, take some ginseng and meditate, or to hang around the closest temple, yoga place, or park that you might happen to stumble upon.
But truth be told, you probably just don’t have the head for any of that. At times you feel like you just don’t know where to make the right turn (note: right in terms of correctness, eh!) and creating the mental calmness to reflect and think about a tough call is not that easy.
If you have ever felt this way, you will know that after spinning your wheels for some crazy amount of time, just like me, you’ll probably decide to go dig around the web for some good ol’ useful no-nonsense advice. Hopefully sooner than later, you’ll arrive at Lifehack and start reading something useful.
Let’s go over some practical, useful, no-mumbo-jumbo-required pointers that will help:
1. Take a hike.
Literally—not the “long hike on a short pier” thing, but actually step outside of the area where you feel you cannot listen to yourself. The blaring TV, surround sound system, and scream and shouts scenario will not help, so step outside, go for a walk, and hunt for a space where you can actually sit for a moment and listen to yourself. Steer away from bars!
The idea is find a place where you can actually relax and no one will bother you. Once you find the right place, include also a virtual hike: turn off the cell phone, tablet or any electronical device that could distract you. It’s about having some quality time with yourself.
2. Stop your pushy self on its tracks.
Do you find yourself fighting the uphill battle and doing your very best, even though all the signs point to a different direction? Well, you should have guessed by now that “that” is not the best approach; there’s a big difference between stubbornness and constancy—if you cannot tell them apart, well we have a situation that will require another post just for this topic. But, for a quick pointer, check how you feel about the situation; if you are uneasy, upset, tired, and about to require anger management support, your actions are stubbornness-based.
3. Patience is not passiveness.
Patience means you understand and are supportive; therefore, you do your very best to obtain the results you are looking for. This is the opposite of hoping things will magically fix themselves and doing nothing. Baking a cake takes time. Sure, you can crank up the temperature, but the end result will not be a cake in 10 minutes, but a half-burnt-half-raw-cake-mess that no one will dare to taste. Every process requires a certain sequence of steps, each with its own time frame.
4. Prioritize in a consistent and consequential way.
Being in a tough call scenario means you have thought long and hard about the topic; therefore, make sure your actions are completely aligned to your actual decision, which in turn are fine-tuned to what’s best for you; keep in mind that you should define that not from an egotistic approach but from a reflective and responsible approach.
5. Ditch doubts and trust your judgment.
If you can think—which you obviously can—and have done precisely that throughout your decision-making process, have complete trust in yourself. Can you imagine how would you act without self-doubts and anxiety? Well, you can; you are more than capable enough to act upon your call. It isn’t about eliminating fear; it is about trusting yourself and your judgment. Go for it now!
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