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Last Updated on February 11, 2021

8 Things To Do When You Want To Give Up

8 Things To Do When You Want To Give Up

Like a lot of people, I have felt the urge to give up on something. It’s easy to get to a point where it seems as though the time you’ve invested in a dream or goal and the time of fruition can be very daunting.

There are cycles of excitement, enthusiasm, creativity, and they are followed by despair, discouragement, and the desire to quit.

Why Do We Give Up Easily?

Our brains are wired to giving up easily, it’s normal. Human beings are believed to act upon the “Pleasure Principle,” the instant gratification:[1]

Instant gratification is the desire to experience pleasure or fulfilment without delay or deferment. Basically, it’s when you want it; and you want it now.

Our brains are wired to immediate rewards in return. We’re born to look for instant gratification because in the ancient times, getting immediate benefits was essential for survival. We are very much present-oriented, and so when we’re not getting what we want immediately, we get anxious and want to give up.

Yes, so once in a while, wanting to give up is normal. But giving up is not okay.

Maybe you’re disappointed or tired because you haven’t succeeded yet after lots of trials, or maybe you’re experiencing one of these: Why We Lose Motivation Once in a While and How to Fix It

But don’t you give up yet because nothing worth having comes easy.

The Consequence of Giving Up Too Early

Instant success is a myth, always. Many successful people failed hundreds of times, if they chose to give up instead of working harder to reach their goals, they would never succeed.

For example, Walt Disney had been fired by a newspaper editor before because he “lacked imagination and had no good ideas.” If he gave up imagining and dreaming about big ideas, he wouldn’t have found the successful Disney business.

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And let’s take the famous soccer player David Beckham as another example. He had a down time after he received a red card in the World Cup match against Argentina in 1998. The England team couldn’t make it to the next round and everyone hated him and blamed him for that. If Beckham gave up playing soccer, we wouldn’t see the successful player leading different teams and becoming one of the most legendary players in history.

If you give up now, you’re giving up the very bright future and great results you will get.

Find out in this article why Giving up Is Not an Option.

8 Things To Do When You Feel Like Giving Up

Do what your future self will thank you for, not regret. Here’re 8 things to do when you feel like you want to give up.

1. Remember Why You Started and How Much You Really Wanted It

Think back to the moment that this project, goal, or concept was conceived. Remember the joy and thrill of the adventure ahead? At the beginning, you had a goal in mind; a beautiful picture etched in your mind of the finished task. Beginning was simple; carrying through has become difficult.

Going back to the beginning brings into focus the purpose of your endeavor. The memory of anticipation of the job accomplished is stirred up again when you begin to contemplate the reason you began in the first place. Breathe in deep and recall your purpose.

Use a little help from this Worksheet For Instant Motivation Boost for free and clear your mind. So you can refocus your mind and regain your lost motivation. Grab your free worksheet and keep moving forward!

2. Look Into the Reason Why You Want to Give Up.

The feelings of wanting to quit can be overwhelming. The generalized feeling isn’t clear; look at the reasons why you want to quit. Are you physically tired? Have you been consumed with things and not taken care of yourself in the process? Do you feel little support? Are you lacking ability? Have you come up against some difficulties that you are unprepared for? Do you need to just take a step back before continuing on?

There are many reasons why you may want to quit. Be diligent in figuring out what the real issues are and tackle them specifically. Once you see what is causing the feeling, you can address it.

Try to do an audit of your life and figure out the reason: How to Get Your Life Back on Track When Things Are Out of Control

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3. Picture in Your Mind the Ultimate Result

Keep in your mind the picture of the end result. A visualization of what you want to accomplish will keep you moving forward. I mean, seriously, you don’t want to stop partway through. The feeling of being a quitter isn’t pleasant. You are a winner! Remember the slogan: the thrill of victory or the agony of defeat!

Whenever you want to quit, ask yourself, do you want the thrill of victory? Or would you rather the agony of defeat? Press on; you can do this. This is how you can stay motivated and persevere even during the difficult times.

To learn to always stay motivated even during the difficult times, join the Fast Track Class – Activate Your Motivation for free. It’s a focused 30-minute session that will help you build your own motivation engine and keep yourself motivated. Join the free class here.

4. Make a Plan and Have a Backup

Before you undertake anything, always have an outlined plan of action.

There are various ways this can be done. You can write a list, make a breakout chart, or form a checklist for tasks completed along the way. By having a plan in place, when you feel like giving up you can look at the plan and refocus on the steps needed to reach the goal.

Also, have a backup plan in mind before beginning; this way when you are frustrated and want to give up, you will have an alternative plan to put in action.

Life will knock you down sometimes, but don’t give up!

5. Find Support From Others

Don’t isolate yourself or hide your feelings of frustration, and don’t be afraid to seek support from others. Reach out to family, friends, co-workers or even online forums to find someone that you can talk to and rid yourself of what is dragging you down and causing you to want to quit.

I promise there are so many other people out there that are struggling with feelings of doubt, fear and frustration just like you are. Finding another person who has gone through a similar crisis will strengthen your resolve and help you get back on course.

Here’re more ways to help you feel inspired: How to Feel Inspired When You’ve Lost Motivation

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6. Be Grateful for the Good Things While Struggling.

Yes, you may feel like giving up. Yes, you are struggling. Yes, you are overwhelmed at the moment. I know this may seem like a strange thing to say, but remember to be grateful. This is essential in a resilient mindset.

Whenever you feel like giving up, stop and make a list of the things you are grateful for in your life. You have so much positivity in your life to be thankful for. When you shift your focus to becoming grateful for all things, tasks that seem overwhelming take on a new light. The way you look at the situations around you depends on the attitude with which you view them. Take on an attitude of gratitude and you will be amazed at the difference it makes.

Learn how to be more resilient: 17 Ways for Building Resilience and Staying Tough

7. Celebrate Your Victories, No Matter How Small They Seem

You deserve to acknowledge all the victories that you have made along the way. Instead of feeling overwhelmed at all that you have left to do, write out a list of accomplishments you have already completed, no matter how small they may seem.

By celebrating your progress, you will renew your energy to complete what you are doing. When you see all that you have done, it will excite you to take further action until the finish line.

Don’t give up!

8. Have Motivational Reminders Everywhere

Here’re some of my favorite motivational quotes, make them your wallpaper or just have the quotes stuck on your desk! Just don’t give up! Never, ever give up!

Never give up on something you really want. It’s difficult to wait but more difficult to regret.

    The expert in anything was once a beginner.

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      Everyone must choose one of two pains: the pain of discipline or the pain of regret.

        Crawling is acceptable. Falling is acceptable. Pain is acceptable. Quitting is now.

          Don’t give up what you want most in life for something you think you want now.

            More Tips to Keep You Going

            Featured photo credit: Galen Crout via unsplash.com

            Reference

            More by this author

            Charlene Tops

            Charlene is a certified life coach who is passionate about writing, speaking and teaching.

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            Published on May 10, 2021

            How To Motivate Yourself To Study When You’re Too Busy With Work

            How To Motivate Yourself To Study When You’re Too Busy With Work

            It was just after 5 AM as I gathered my things to head to the gym. As I walked down the hall, I noticed the light on in my daughter Kinsey’s bedroom. She isn’t typically up that early, so I decided to peek inside to see what was going on.

            As I opened the door, I saw her sitting in bed with her laptop open and a perplexed look on her face.

            “What are you doing?” I asked.
            “I’m doing some last-minute studying before I take my pharmacology exam.”
            “Why are you doing it so early?” I questioned.
            “I need to get it done before I go to work because I have a full day, and I won’t want to do it later.”

            Kinsey is a great student, and she works full-time and goes to school, so I didn’t want to question her actions. Still, as she responded, it hit me. This was one way she kept her motivation to study when she was too busy with work.

            I didn’t want to disturb her further, so I slowly closed the door and went on my way, pondering the question on my own, “how does one maintain their motivation to study when they are too busy with work?”

            Motivation is an interesting topic that psychologists, sociologists, and scientists of all types have studied for decades. Countless books and articles have been written on the subject and continue to pop up each year. But what motivates us in certain situations? How can we stay motivated when we have so many other things on our minds like work?

            To answer these questions, we first need to understand motivation itself. More specifically, the two types of motivation: intrinsic and extrinsic.

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            Intrinsic motivation is an incentive to engage in a specific activity that derives from pleasure in the activity itself rather than because of any external benefits that might be obtained.[1] It sounds like, “I’m going to work hard to get that promotion so I can be more fulfilled at work.”

            On the other hand, extrinsic motivation is an external incentive to engage in a specific activity, especially motivation arising from the expectation of punishment or reward.[2] It sounds like, “I really want that promotion at work to make more money.”

            How we are motivated really comes down to whether the motivation is coming from within us or outside us. We all tend to gravitate toward one more than the other, but this can depend on a specific situation.

            Let’s look at the facts from the specific situation in my example and break them down to understand them further.

            • Kinsey works and goes to school like a lot of college students.
            • Kinsey was taking her exam very early in the morning before her usual wake-up time.
            • She was doing the exam before going to work.
            • She had a busy day of work ahead.
            • She acknowledged that she would not want to do it later.

            All of the facts above point to a motivated individual. What they don’t tell us specifically is, was she motivated intrinsically or extrinsically? I would lean towards intrinsic as there doesn’t seem to be any obvious reward.

            This example provides some less apparent clues to ways that can help others like you. I’ve compiled the secrets inspired by these clues, along with some additional wisdom I’ve learned along the way to help you in maintaining your motivation to study.

            Here are 11 tips on how to motivate yourself to study even when you’re too busy with work.

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            1. Have a Great mindset

            It all starts here, and a positive mindset can go a long way. Believe that you will achieve your goals, and focus on the good things that you have already done. Studies show that being optimistic leads to getting more done and having better overall mental and physical well-being.[3]

            2. Visualize Success

            Once your mindset is in order, then the next step is to visualize your success. Begin with a clear vision of what you want to achieve and then experience the feeling of having that success. For example, if you know you want to get an A on an exam, break down the steps to learning the material to ensure success.

            3. Break Your Goals Into Small Attainable Tasks

            Sometimes, a goal can feel too big, like graduating college with straight A’s. Think of the goals you have and break them down into simple, attainable steps instead.

            For example, if you know you want to get an A on an exam, start with gathering the right resources to study, and then go further to identify what you need from each resource. Once you drill down far enough, everything becomes attainable.

            4. Reward yourself

            Rewards help keep you motivated as long as they are healthy. Once you’ve set a goal, establish a small reward for achieving it. Whether it’s an edible treat you love or something bigger like a massage, this type of external motivator can help maintain your motivation and push you closer to your bigger goals.

            5. Pomodoro for the Win

            The Pomodoro Technique is a time management system that encourages you to work with the time you have, rather than against it. Break the time you have to study into 25-minute chunks separated by 5-minute breaks. Each interval or Pomodoro helps you resist interruptions and trains your brain to focus. You’ll find that the sense of urgency it creates is a fantastic motivator.

            6. Measure Progress

            Once you start to accomplish goals and have successful Pomodoro’s, you need to measure it all. If you do not measure and report your progress, then you’re probably not making much progress at all. According to Pearson’s Law, when performance is measured, it improves; when performance is measured and reported, it improves exponentially.

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            7. Make It a Competition

            Healthy competition is advantageous to keep you moving, and it’s great for building your motivation to study. You can positively compete with others to push each other to succeed. If you don’t have anyone else, then set up a competition with yourself.

            For example, see how many Pomodoro’s you can do without breaking focus and looking at your phone. Keep pushing the bar higher, and you will strive to reach it.

            8. Find a Mentor

            Another way for you to build and maintain your motivation to study is to find a mentor. Having a mentor is a great way to motivate and connect with someone you admire or someone in the field that you are studying. Having a mentor provides a double benefit in that they can provide both assistance and encouragement to you on your road to success.

            9. Get an Accountability Buddy

            While this is occasionally the role of a mentor, you can also find another person studying the same thing as you as your accountability buddy or partner. With both of you focused on the same outcome, you can share ideas that you may not have thought of and understand the point of view of your friend.

            Studies show that publicly committing your goals to someone gives you at least a 65% chance of completing them. Having a specific accountability partner increases your chance of success to 95%.[4]

            10. Find “Your” Time

            There’s a funny line from an old movie, Fast Times at Ridgemont High, where a student is disrupting class, and the teacher tells him to stop interrupting the class and do what he’s doing on his own time. The student responds, “I’m here, you’re here, doesn’t that make it our time?”

            Whether you are studying with a group or solo, you still need to find the time that works best for your needs and your brain. For some, this is first thing in the morning, but for others, it’s after work when they have decompressed. By measuring your success and the efficiency of your Pomodoro’s, you can identify the optimal time for you.

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            11. Move

            Taking the time to move is critical toward moving towards your goals. It doesn’t matter if you study at a desk, in bed, or on the floor, you still need to move. Take short five-minute breaks after each successful Pomodoro to stand up, stretch, and move your legs around. This increased blood flow will help keep you awake and get oxygen to your brain.

            After you’ve completed four consecutive sessions, then it’s time for a more extended 15 to 20-minute break. This break is the optimal time to get some fresh air and brief exercise outside. This short amount of time will make a significant difference in your level of motivation.

            Final Thoughts

            Any of the above tips on their own can help with building and maintaining motivation when put into action. Find the ones that work for you and make them a habit. Once this is done, you won’t need the level of external motivation as you will be programmed internally for success.

            I want to think that I’ve raised Kinsey with some good internal programming and her grades indicate that as well. When she got home from work around 7 PM, she came into my office and asked if she could use it for a while.

            I said, “Sure, what do you need to do?”
            “Take my pharmacology exam.”
            “I thought you took it this morning.”
            “I was going to, but the opening time was wrong on the exam, so it didn’t open until noon today instead of midnight.”
            “Oh, I get it now. Sure, let me get out, so you have peace and quiet.”

            I closed the door and left her in the serenity of my cave, knowing she would get a good grade on her exam. I ended up being right about the grade but not about the source of her motivation to study that morning.

            When she emerged from the office about 30 minutes later, she quickly turned on the TV. It all came down to the fact that she didn’t want to miss the season finale of The Batchelor. I guess it was more extrinsic than I thought.

            More Tips on Staying Motivated

            Featured photo credit: Green Chameleon via unsplash.com

            Reference

            [1] American Psychological Association: intrinsic motivation
            [2] American Psychological Association: extrinsic motivation
            [3] NCBI: Optimism and Its Impact on Mental and Physical Well-Being
            [4] Entrepreneur: An Accountability Partner Makes You Vastly More Likely to Succeed

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