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Published on November 13, 2018

Are You Too Lazy or Just Haven’t Found Your Passion Yet?

Are You Too Lazy or Just Haven’t Found Your Passion Yet?

To be the exact person we are at this moment in time, with this DNA, this personality and our unique perspective is a 1 in 400 trillion “chance” of being alive. Dr Ali Binazir illustrates it this way:

“It is the probability of 2 million people getting together to play a game of dice with trillion-sided dice. They each roll the dice and they all come up with the exact same number—for example, 550,343,279,001.”

You can think of yourself as a miracle of fate or physiology. So, what’s our purpose?

There is a lot of talk about finding our passion in the media. A google search turned up 189,000,000 results on the subject. That’s considerable pressure. That pressure increases when we see someone who seems to have taken their passion by the reigns and is riding it through the sky like a Pegasus.

Seeing someone doing something we love or is smack dab in their “true” passion, seem to exacerbate things that may not be going so well in our own life. Realize that is not really the case. It looks seamless but we don’t see all the failures, embarrassing moments or hurdles they’ve already crossed. They just keep trying.

Lazy is different than avoiding “pain”. Those most successful have pushed through the hard-painful stuff. So, here’s the skinny on manifesting your elusive passion:

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Define Your Self Passion

Passion can mean many things, and it’s going to come from the very core of your personal story, not anyone else’s.

Remember that 1 in 400 trillion statistic? Your life is going to have its own path, and you will react to it with your DNA, from your personality, influenced by your circumstances and environment. Your passion can be anything that synchronously motivates, intrigues or challenges you. Your purpose can be connected to a vocation, family, or distinct meaning.

To think that we all have one singular purpose or passion is naive. That’s what makes it so hard. We feel bad if we don’t have it all figured out.

I have several passions, and I make them a part of my life. The one thing I do is focus on not fragmenting myself in too many directions. I love flying helicopters, but that’s not my job, it’s a passion. I love figuring things out and being technical, and I’ve’ utilized that in my job many times, but it’s not the direction I follow.

I feel most dynamic and connected to my intuition and intelligence when I write, travel and help others transform their goals.

Need a formula? Try this:

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  • Think with your heart, not your head.
  • Ask those close to you what your strengths and weaknesses are.
  • Make a list of your own self perceptions.
  • Stack your love’s and dislikes against each other.
  • Stop playing by the rules.
  • Take action(s) daily.
  • Test things out and learn.
  • Use Mel Robbins 5,4,3,2,1 rule.
  • Jump.

Achieving your passion means finding a balance and living up to one’s potential in all areas of life.

You Don’t Need Permission

I used to put so much pressure on myself that I would become overwhelmed and follow opportunities I didn’t really want because it’s what was expected; or I didn’t want to disappoint someone. Even harder to admit that it was the easier path to go. Because following your real purpose and passion is a lot of work.

In the end, there were times I ended up disappointing myself. And we are the ones who must live with ourselves 24 hours a day. Think about that.

I was focused on immediate control, rather than a bigger passion. We’re enamored with the idea that finding our passion is the key to life — getting away, being successful, free, doing something fun and adventurous, seeing cool things, meeting different people or being famous. It’s not. It all sounds so exciting but getting clear on what we want only happens with steps.

Our environment matters, our connections matter, our time matters, and our discipline matters. The more we understand this, the clearer we get on our passions.

Taking action means setting goals and forming a system. There can be no up without down, input without output, positive with negative and so on. You will oscillate, and that’s okay. Here’s the thing:

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You don’t need anyone’s permission to follow your purpose. Likewise, you don’t need permission to be okay with not having one.

You won’t upset the order of the universe. Forming habits and following goals is still a purpose. If you’re looking to define your passion, utilize the steps above to get clear. It’s one of the most affirming things you can do for yourself.

Take Baby Steps

You must take action. Baby steps are fine, but you must move forward and keep trying. It’s inevitably the way we learn. It’s how we learned to walk, talk, read and tie our shoes. Did we judge ourselves as a child, as harshly as we do now? No.

When people talk about reaching their passion to feel whole, they really want to achieve balance. They want to reserve time for work, family, friends, and personal needs, but not overdo it. Here are a few things to take hold of without regret:

  • Eliminate negative people from your life.
  • Keeping appointments with yourself just like any other (yoga, reading, exercise, cooking….)
  • Educate yourself and seek knowledge.
  • Eliminate overextending yourself.
  • Eliminate frivolous commitments, spending or tasks.
  • Do more of what gives you a buzz of excitement.
  • Achieve one thing a day towards your goals (passion or purpose)

Passion and curiosity come hand in hand, if you’re not wondering about new things and ideas you’re not tapping into your potential passions.

Even the expert was once a beginner. It’s only consistency and perseverance that made the expert successful, they could have given up anytime.

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Usually the things you sacrifice your “free” time for can be called a passion. Do you want to make a business out of that, or is it enough that you savor it?

Keep in mind your passion may not remained rooted, it may be more fluid developing over time.

Final Thoughts

Your passion and purpose take on the form you give it. It functions from your actions and inherent beliefs.

Like living, breathing, relationships, you need to treat it like being with someone who encourages you to keep falling in love with yourself.

Fall in love with you. Make the moves, step over the boundaries, and fly. In the words of Joe Brock, author of Thoughts Of Erotica:

“This is the way of the future where healthy, stable relationships (insert passions) are once again the norm and standard.”

Featured photo credit: Tom Morel via unsplash.com

More by this author

Liz Galloway

I'm an idealist, columnist & traveler helping people connect through personal discovery. Stay inspired!

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Last Updated on December 13, 2018

How to Get Motivated and Be Happy Every Day When You Wake Up

How to Get Motivated and Be Happy Every Day When You Wake Up

It’s Monday morning. The alarm rings. What’s the first thought that comes to mind when you open your eyes?

“I really don’t want to go to work today”, “I have such a long day ahead, what a dread”, or “Yes! It’s a brand new week ahead! Looking forward to getting lots done.”

Whatever your response may be, ask yourself this question:

“What is it that made you feel unmotivated?” What was driving you to feel negative or positive about your Monday ahead? How to get motivated?

Meet Nancy

I used to have a colleague by the name of Nancy. She came to work at the same time every morning, and would leave at 6.30 sharp every evening. Not a minute earlier, not a minute later. She was known to be the office grinch as she was often grumpy towards everyone, so much so people would avoid her whenever possible. She complained about everything under the sun.

I had a brief conversation with her one morning in the office lounge where we were both getting coffee. She told me she had been working with the company for over 20 years! When she told me that, I asked her what motivated her to stay on for so long, and her reply was simply “I don’t know. It’s a job that pays the bills, and is close to where I live.” With that, she walked away and I was left standing alone in the lounge with my hot coffee, at a loss for words.

How could someone be doing the exact same thing for over 20 years? And she clearly doesn’t enjoy her work, what with all that complaints and grouchy attitude. So why hasn’t she done anything about it?

The 2 Types of People

This might be an extreme case, but I’m sure you must know of people who have been doing the same thing for years and seem to not have any problem staying stagnant. Whether it be in their marriage, job, or personal endeavors, they seem to be getting along just fine without progressing towards anything ‘better’.

On the other hand, I’m sure you would also know of individuals who focus on the positive, set goals and are constantly pushing themselves to greater heights. Be it promotions at work, building a family, celebrating milestones in their marriage or relationships, upgrading houses and cars, setting up new businesses, or going to school again, these individuals seem to constantly progress towards something that improves or enhances their life.

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So what’s the difference between these 2 category of individuals?

What you feel like or don’t feel like doing, boils down to one thing. And that is motivation. It is the force, or lack of, that keeps driving you forward to overcome challenges and obstacles to achieve your goals.

Without motivation, you’ll give up after a few failed attempts or even on the first tough challenge that comes your way. Or, in the case of Nancy, just remain where you are: unhappy yet not doing anything to progress ahead.

What is Motivation, Really?

Whether you realize it or not, motivation is a huge force in your life; and it needs to be harnessed in order to excel and actually enjoy whatever it is that you’re doing on a daily basis.

Unfortunately, many overgeneralize the word motivation. We think of being either motivated or demotivated as a simple “yes” or “no” state of being.

But motivation is not a switch. Motivation is a flow. To feel motivated, you need to dive beyond the surface. Just reading a motivational quote, being encouraged by your friends or even mentor won’t help you build sustainable motivation in the long run.

You can think of the motivation that we want to achieve like the Sun (self-sustaining and long lasting), which supplies a constant influx of energy to all life on Earth. Just like the Sun, your “motivation engine” has different layers, starting from the core and spreading out to the surface. The surface is what you see, but the real process is driven from the core; and that’s the most important part… I’ll explain why in a moment.

If you can create a self sustaining motivation engine, you’ll not only be able to find more meaning and purpose in your life, but you’ll be able to enjoy every minute of what you’re doing, which will make your roles and responsibilities less of a chore. Now wouldn’t that be a game changer?

Let me help you understand this motivation flow better, by breaking down the Motivation Engine into 3 parts:

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  1. Core – Purpose
  2. Support – Enablers
  3. Surface – Acknowledgement

I’d say we’re most familiar with layers 2 and 3, as we come into direct contact with both of them frequently.

The Second Layer: Support – Enablers

In essence, the second layer of the Motivation Engine (also known as Enablers) is what supports your goals. They can magnify the motivation core you have, or speed up the momentum that you build. Basically, they create favorable circumstances for things to go smoothly.  

The Third Layer: Surface – Acknowledgement

The third layer, also known as Acknowledgement, encompasses any type of external recognition that might give you motivation. It may come in the form of respect or recognition, such as compliments and praise.

Or it could be emotional support through encouragement, feedback and constructive criticism. It could also be affiliation, where you have mutual companions or buddies sharing the same goal or burden with you.

This is generally what you see on the surface when you look at other people. You see the external acknowledgement, respect, and recognition they’re getting.

The Innermost Layer: Core – Purpose

But what’s most important, and the true driving force behind your Motivation flow, is the innermost core – your Purpose. Your purpose is what differentiates the motivated from the demotivated, the achievers from the underachievers, the happy from the unhappy.

Your motivational core is your Purpose, and is sustained by two things: Having Meaning, and Forward Movement. With these two as a foundation, you’ll have a power source that will feed you motivational energy indefinitely.

So, how do you do these two things?

How to Sustain Your Purpose

Having Meaning is simple. Just ask yourself a question: Why?

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Why are you pursuing a certain goal? If the reason is vague or unclear, then your motivational energy will be the same. While motivation provides you energy to do something, that energy needs to be focused somewhere. So without meaning, there is no direction for your energy to be focused on.

Yet, having a meaningful objective doesn’t mean you have to change the world or create A huge impact on society. The secret to meaningful work is simple: it should contribute value to something or someone that matters to you.

Next up is gaining Forward Movement. In short, this means to just keep moving. Like a snowball, motivation from having progress creates momentum. So to keep this up, you have to keep moving.

And the good news is, your progress doesn’t have to be huge for you to recognize it. Small amounts of progress can be just as motivating, as long as they keep coming. Like driving a car, you may be really impatient if you’re at a complete halt. But, it lessens if you’re moving forward–even if you’re moving slowly.

Creating a simple progress indicator like checklists or milestones, are a great way to visualize your small (and big) wins. They trigger your brain to recognize and acknowledge them, giving you small boosts of motivational energy.

This is why video games are so addictive! They’re full of progress indicators everywhere. Even though the progress is completely virtual, they’re still able to trigger the motivation centers in your brain.

Find Out What Drives You Today

So why not take some time today and do a quick reflection of where you’re at now? Take one aspect of your life that you’d like to be more motivated.

For example, it may be your current job. First, start with why. Write down your reasons for why you’re in the job that you’re in. Then think about your Motivation Core: Your Purpose. Write down what it is within your job that gives you meaning, and what are some things that will help push you forward in life.

Once you have those points, it’s time to do a comparison. Does your current job help you make progress towards that Purpose that you’ve written?  

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If it does, then wonderful! You’re on the right track. But if it doesn’t entirely, or you now realize you’re way off target, don’t panic. It’s definitely not too late to align your actions back to your true purpose.

Here at Lifehack, we’ve condensed over 15 years of life improvement coaching into 7 distinct Cornerstone Skills. And finding motivation is just 1 of 7 Cornerstone Skills that you can master to dramatically turn your life around!

Wouldn’t We All Like to Be Happy?

Happiness need not be a vague term or illusion that you’re constantly chasing after–with no end in sight. By finding your true motivation, you’ll be one step closer to realizing your happiness and finding meaning in all things you do.

And for those of you who feel like you’re already working towards your purpose or goals, learning these 7 Cornerstone Skills will only help you to push progress even further, and at a much faster rate. Wouldn’t it be amazing to be 10 times more productive?

You may have read hundreds of books, articles, and watched videos, maybe even tried some solutions too to help you stay motivated. But, none of them really have any impact. They bring only incremental changes, and that’s not what you’re really looking for. This is because permanent change requires a holistic approach, and is more than just focusing on one area of your life, or working on changing a part of your routine or actions.

You want to make a fundamental change; but it feels like big, unknown territory that you can’t afford to venture into at this point in your life.

The truth is, taking your life to the next stage doesn’t have to be this complicated. With our course, it’s actually quite simple. It’s an all in approach, and the 7 Cornerstone Skills is just what you need to make that holistic change. So if you’d like to take the first step to achieving your life purpose, the time is now!

Featured photo credit: Candice Picard via unsplash.com

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