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Last Updated on May 8, 2019

How to Break a Habit and Hack the Habit Loop

How to Break a Habit and Hack the Habit Loop

Is there something that you just love or can’t stop doing on a daily basis? Maybe you absolutely have to start your day with a coffee or you won’t be able to function. Or, you need to go for a run every evening. Perhaps it is something more subtle, like twirling your hair whenever you’re in deep thought, or tapping your fingers whenever you’re feeling impatient.

Take some time now to think about something specific that you find yourself doing all the time. How did that habit form? Is it something you want to continue doing, or is it something you’d rather do away with? And most importantly, how is it affecting your life?

When it comes to habits and routines, most people want to learn how to be in control of them. Whether it’s trying to quit smoking, maintaining a healthy diet or going to bed early, habits can be hard to control. They are really quite sneaky since they are behaviors that develop and occur subconsciously; yet they also have the biggest impact in the outcome of our successes, whether you realize it or not.

Habits Govern Your Life!

Many people don’t consider habits as a key factor of their personal success because they simply see them as routines. Habits are either good or bad–and that’s as far as most people would go. They don’t necessarily make the connection to personal success.

This is because most people put emphasis on external factors when looking at success. They may consider luck, educational or family background when determining success. While habits are largely internal, they are often overlooked.

The truth is, habits are a core factor that govern almost every aspect of our lives. They account for the vast majority of our actions on a daily basis from big to small: your morning routine, where you typically have lunch, or even the route you take to work and back home. These are all habits!

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If you’re someone who has strong willpower, or a high threshold of discipline, then great! You might find that breaking a bad habit or sticking to a new good habit is not too hard. But for the vast majority of us, that can be a real issue.

Thankfully, habits don’t rely only on one’s willpower. Successful people are able to actively steer their habits, and use them as a tool to create consistent and systematic inputs or actions towards an output or outcome that they want to achieve.

So how does one break a habit?

Deconstructing a Habit

Thankfully, habits can be tamed; and, once you gain full control over them, you’re going to realize their true potential in steering your life towards greater achievement and progress.

So, let me deconstruct a habit for you.

The way in which a habit is formed can be described as a Habit Loop. This is a cycle that governs how every habit forms and functions.

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It’s made up of three key components:

  1. Cue
  2. Routine
  3. Reward

A Cue

A Cue is something that triggers your habit. It might be an event, an action, a feeling, people, or even an emotional state.

A Routine

A Routine is the behavior that follows after your habit has been triggered. Because habits are on ‘autopilot’, a routine is usually the same sequence of actions that is taken each and every time.

A Reward

A Reward is the positive reinforcement your brain identifies with the Routine that you’ve just taken. It associates the Routine with the Cue; so, your brain remembers to repeat the behavior again in order to get the same Reward in the future.

Looking at this simple loop, you can see that the culprit of any bad habit starts from the Cue. That is what triggers the start of the Habit Loop.

Let’s use a popular example of a bad habit: Smoking.

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Perhaps you might be feeling stressed (Cue) after a long meeting; you decide to take a little break and light up a cigarette (Routine). While smoking, you start feeling calm and relaxed from the nicotine rush, giving you a physical sensation of satisfaction (Reward). As a result, you continue with this routine every time you feel stressed or want to unwind.

Here, you can see that Cues are the starting point for each time you go through a Habit Loop. Theoretically, without the Cue to trigger your habit, your Routine or behavior won’t follow… and the Reward will not be attained. When any part of the Habit Loop is broken, that’s a potential weak point, which you can utilize to help you break your habit.

It’s Time to Take Control of Your Cues

This means that the first step to controlling your habits is to take control of your Cues. Go back to the specific habit that I asked you to think of in the beginning. Can you identify the cue that kicks off your habit?

Now, think of another habit that you have. Of the 2 habits that you’ve identified, which one is more prominent in your daily life? Now compare the 2 potential cues for each habit. Are they different in nature?

Since Cues are the beginning spark for any habit to form, one of the main reasons habits are unequal is because they each have a different Quality of Cues. Some Cues are just more effective than others. The more Regular a cue is, the more likely the habit will form. The more Stable a cue is, in that it is seldom affected by external factors, it is also more likely the habit will form.

And, while we’re talking about regularity and stability, time is of the essence. The shorter the time frame that a cue repeats, the more effective a Cue becomes. Anything more than a week means a Cue becomes a lot less effective.

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Ready to Break the Habit Loop?

By now, I hope you can see that every element in the Habit Loop feeds and reinforces each other, creating a snowball effect. A habit becomes stronger as you repeat it more times. By understanding and tackling the first part of the Habit Loop – the Cue, you’re already one step closer to controlling your habits!

Now, you may have read hundreds of books, articles, and watched videos, maybe even tried some solutions to help you break or form new habits. But, none of them really had any impact. They bring only incremental changes, and that’s not what you’re looking for.

This is because permanent change requires a holistic approach, and requires more than just focusing on one area of your life or working on changing a part of your routine or actions.

Your habits are just part of a greater system of thinking that is responsible for the way your life turns out. Every action and behavior comes from an original thought pattern. So if you really want to break bad habits, create new ones and have a total lifestyle change, then you’ll need to change more than just your habits.

This is where the Breakthrough Framework comes in. It’ll help provide an overall paradigm shift for you to turn any limitation you may be having, into an opportunity that is achievable.

By going through each of the 4 steps, you’ll be able to transform your mind and actions towards the change that is needed to achieve your ultimate goals, and truly break free from anything that is currently holding you back.

So if you’re ready for lasting change, start the life-changing journey with us here!

Featured photo credit: Lukas Blazek via unsplash.com

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Leon Ho

Founder & CEO of Lifehack

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Last Updated on October 16, 2019

Invaluable Lessons You Can Learn From Your Mistakes

Invaluable Lessons You Can Learn From Your Mistakes

Do you like making mistakes?

I certainly don’t.

Making mistakes is inevitable. Wouldn’t it be wonderful if we could be at ease with them?

Perhaps there is a way to think of them differently and see their benefits.

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Why Mistakes Feel Dangerous

Mistakes often feel dangerous. Throughout human history, our errors have often been treated as dangerous for a variety of reasons:

  • Our vulnerability. We have limited and fragile support systems. When those systems fail, people often lose their lives.
  • Real dangers. Nature can be dangerous, and making mistakes can put us at the mercy of nature and its animal residents seeking a meal.
  • Ignorance. Many cultures scapegoats someone whenever there is a failure of some kind. Scapegoating can be serious and deadly.
  • Order. Many societies punish those who do not conform to the prevailing orthodoxy and treat difference and non-conformity as a mistake. Even our brains flash an error message whenever we go against prevailing social norms.

We have a history of handling mistakes and failure in an unpleasant way. Since each of us carries our human history with us, it can be a challenge to overcome the fear of making mistakes.

If we can embrace the reality of mistakes, we can free ourselves to be more creative in our lives and dig up some interesting insights.

Why We Can’t Avoid Making Mistakes

Many people operate under the notion that making mistakes is an aberration, a mistake if you will. You can call it perfectionism but it is a more substantial problem. It is really a demand for order and continuity.

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When we think we can eliminate mistakes, we are often working from a perspective that sees the world as a fixed place. The world, however, is not so obliging. Like it or not, the world, and everything in it, is constantly changing.

Change is more constant and pervasive than we can see with our own eyes which is why we often miss it. Our bodies are constantly changing. The natural conditions of the earth change constantly as well. Everything, including economic and cultural systems have life cycles. Everything is in a constant state of flux.

We cannot see all of the changes going on around us since rates of change vary. Unfortunately, when we try to create a feeling of certainty and solidity in our lives or operate from the illusion of stability and order, we are fighting reality and our natural evolution which is built on adapting to change.

It is better to continually bend into this reality rather than fight every change we experience. Fighting it can cause us to make more mistakes. Finding the benefits in change can be useful and help us minimize unnecessary mistakes.

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Lessons Learned from Making Mistakes

Life has so many uncertainties and variables that mistakes are inevitable. Fortunately, there are many things you can learn from making mistakes.

Here is a list of ways to harness the mistakes you make for your benefit.

  1. Point us to something we did not know.
  2. Reveal a nuance we missed.
  3. Deepen our knowledge.
  4. Tell us something about our skill levels.
  5. Help us see what matters and what does not.
  6. Inform us more about our values.
  7. Teach us more about others.
  8. Let us recognize changing circumstances.
  9. Show us when someone else has changed.
  10. Keep us connected to what works and what doesn’t work.
  11. Remind us of our humanity.
  12. Spur us to want to better work which helps us all.
  13. Promote compassion for ourselves and others.
  14. Teach us to value forgiveness.
  15. Help us to pace ourselves better.
  16. Invite us to better choices.
  17. Can teach us how to experiment.
  18. Can reveal a new insight.
  19. Can suggest new options we had not considered.
  20. Can serve as a warning.
  21. Show us hidden fault lines in our lives which can lead us to more productive arrangements.
  22. Point out structural problems in our lives.
  23. Prompt us to learn more about ourselves.
  24. Remind us how we are like others.
  25. Make us more humble.
  26. Help us rectify injustices in our lives.
  27. Show us where to create more balance in our lives.
  28. Tell us when the time to move on has occurred.
  29. Reveal where our passion is and where it is not.
  30. Expose our true feelings.
  31. Bring out problems in a relationship.
  32. Can be a red flag for our misjudgments.
  33. Point us in a more creative direction.
  34. Show us when we are not listening.
  35. Wake us up to our authentic selves.
  36. Can create distance with someone else.
  37. Slow us down when we need to.
  38. Can hasten change.
  39. Reveal our blind spots.
  40. Are the invisible made visible.

Reframe Reality to Handle Mistakes More Easily

The secret to handling mistakes is to:

  • Expect them as part of the process of growth and development.
  • Have an experimental mindset.
  • Think in evolutional rather than fixed terms.

When we accept change as the natural structure of the world, our vulnerability and humanness lets us work with the ebb and flow of life.

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When we recognize the inevitability of mistakes as part of the ongoing experiment which life is, then we can relax more. In doing so we may make fewer of them.

It also helps to keep in mind that trial and error is an organic natural way of living. It is how we have evolved over time. It is better to be with our natural evolution than to fight it and make life harder.

When we adopt an evolutional mindset and see ourselves as part of the ongoing human experiment, we can appreciate that all that has been built up over time which includes the many mistakes our ancestors have made over thousands of years. Each one of us today is a part of that human tradition of learning and experimenting,

Mistakes are part of the trial and error, experimental nature of life. The more you adopt the experimental, evolutional frame, the easier it becomes to handle mistakes.

Handling mistakes well can help you relax and enjoy all aspects of life more.

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Featured photo credit: Sarah Kilian via unsplash.com

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