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3 Warning Signs It’s Time To End The Relationship, Even If It Hurts

3 Warning Signs It’s Time To End The Relationship, Even If It Hurts

First, you’re madly in love, your head spinning with big hopes and plans for the future. But when that stage of the relationship has ended, it’s time to start evaluating whether you and your honey are compatible long term. Have you ever known someone who never seemed to stop complaining about a significant other and who seemed more annoyed by their partner than fulfilled? Have you ever wondered why they were still with them? There are many reasons people decide to stay in a relationship even though it no longer makes them happy. Sometimes, they don’t even realize they’re clinging to something that has been long dead. Here are 3 warning signs that mark a relationship is approaching its swan song.

1. You don’t feel excited about the relationship anymore, only obligated to stay.

There are several reasons you might feel an obligation to stay with your partner: kids, financial security, guilt. Answer this simple question: do you enjoy being with your partner and why are you with them? If you have trouble answering that question, or if you find that your answer has less to do with love and more to do with obligation, then it may be time to leave.Remember it’s not just you who is negatively affected in staying in a relationship; your partner will feel it in some shape or form too.

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2. You think that what you have is better than nothing.

This is a fear-based relationship, not one based on love and companionship. If this is how you feel, then you’re probably just afraid to be alone. Really, if you’re not ready to be alone with yourself, then you’re not ready to be in a relationship anyways. Instead of fearing loneliness, embrace the time you have between relationships and use it as an opportunity to better yourself. Remember that you’re far more likely to be miserable in a sad relationship than you are without a partner at all.

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3. You spend more time complaining about what you have than being appreciative.

This is a definite sign that somewhere deep down, you feel like your just settling. This doesn’t have to mean that your partner is a bad person or hasn’t tried to make the relationship work; it doesn’t even mean that you don’t still love them in some way. We’re all very different and each of us has our own ideal partner; we look for that person in each new relationship, hoping that each will bring us to our soul mate. It can be hard to accept that we haven’t found them yet. Here’s some food for thought. If you don’t feel that your partner is right for you, odds are that your partner may feel the same way on some level. The best thing that the two of you can do for one another when you feel this way, especially if you do love each other, is to let the relationship go.

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Never discount a failed relationship as a waste of time. Every new person we meet, every fresh romance, and every heartbreak teaches us something new and opens up opportunities for self-improvement and self-love. Work on being grateful for the time you spent with previous partners, even if the experience made you unhappy. Life is a learning experience and it takes practice for us to learn how to be in a relationship and with whom. Know when it’s time to move on and if you do, do it with grace and love. You don’t deserve to be with somebody who’s doing you more harm than good any more than they deserve to be with you when you really don’t want to be there. Don’t be afraid of change and you’ll meet the right person in time.

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Marina Richter

Freelance Writer

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Last Updated on January 21, 2020

How to Motivate People Around You and Inspire Them

How to Motivate People Around You and Inspire Them

If I was a super hero I’d want my super power to be the ability to motivate everyone around me. Think of how many problems you could solve just by being able to motivate people towards their goals. You wouldn’t be frustrated by lazy co-workers. You wouldn’t be mad at your partner for wasting the weekend in front of the TV. Also, the more people around you are motivated toward their dreams, the more you can capitalize off their successes.

Being able to motivate people is key to your success at work, at home, and in the future because no one can achieve anything alone. We all need the help of others.

So, how to motivate people? Here are 7 ways to motivate others even you can do.

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1. Listen

Most people start out trying to motivate someone by giving them a lengthy speech, but this rarely works because motivation has to start inside others. The best way to motivate others is to start by listening to what they want to do. Find out what the person’s goals and dreams are. If it’s something you want to encourage, then continue through these steps.

2. Ask Open-Ended Questions

Open-ended questions are the best way to figure out what someone’s dreams are. If you can’t think of anything to ask, start with, “What have you always wanted to do?”

“Why do you want to do that?”

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“What makes you so excited about it?”

“How long has that been your dream?”

You need this information the help you with the following steps.

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3. Encourage

This is the most important step, because starting a dream is scary. People are so scared they will fail or look stupid, many never try to reach their goals, so this is where you come in. You must encourage them. Say things like, “I think you will be great at that.” Better yet, say, “I think your skills in X will help you succeed.” For example if you have a friend who wants to own a pet store, say, “You are so great with animals, I think you will be excellent at running a pet store.”

4. Ask About What the First Step Will Be

After you’ve encouraged them, find how they will start. If they don’t know, you can make suggestions, but it’s better to let the person figure out the first step themselves so they can be committed to the process.

5. Dream

This is the most fun step, because you can dream about success. Say things like, “Wouldn’t it be cool if your business took off, and you didn’t have to work at that job you hate?” By allowing others to dream, you solidify the motivation in place and connect their dreams to a future reality.

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6. Ask How You Can Help

Most of the time, others won’t need anything from you, but it’s always good to offer. Just letting the person know you’re there will help motivate them to start. And, who knows, maybe your skills can help.

7. Follow Up

Periodically, over the course of the next year, ask them how their goal is going. This way you can find out what progress has been made. You may need to do the seven steps again, or they may need motivation in another area of their life.

Final Thoughts

By following these seven steps, you’ll be able to encourage the people around you to achieve their dreams and goals. In return, you’ll be more passionate about getting to your goals, you’ll be surrounded by successful people, and others will want to help you reach your dreams …

Oh, and you’ll become a motivational super hero. Time to get a cape!

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Featured photo credit: Thought Catalog via unsplash.com

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