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5 Things You Can Do To Build Trust Quickly

5 Things You Can Do To Build Trust Quickly

I was selling products all day and was finishing up talking to this customer when he paused, looked straight into my eyes, and said, ‘A good man you are, there’s only a couple of us left.’ Then he walked away with his wife.

I immediately thought to myself how strange it was to hear a customer speak from the heart to a sales person. A flood of memories from all the different times I had built trust with people, very quickly after meeting them, came to mind. This experience triggered me to clearly see the patterns of trust building that I’ve used throughout my life.

Based on my intuitive insight, and following up with some psychology research, I want to give you 5 things that you can do to build trust quickly.

1. Show your authentic smile

Research shows that genuine smiles, the kind of smiles that engage the muscles around the eyes, are indicators of trustworthiness.

The reason I call it your authentic smile is because it has to come from the emotional capacity within you. Every time that I’ve been able to build trust quickly, I’ve exhibited high amounts of positive emotion that naturally produces a smile on my face.

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What I’ve caught myself doing that I find to be effective, which you can do too, is that I prime my emotions. This means that I consciously regulate my emotions before or after an event. I think through how I feel and I try to focus on something that I can approach with a positive disposition.

For example, I might think to myself that I get to meet lots of interesting customers and I get to connect with them. This thought allows me to focus on connecting with other people, and instead of focusing on myself, I now have built an emotional capacity to connect with others. This enables me to experience more positive emotion, leading to me showing my authentic smile, and people trusting my face.

I know that people who are higher in extraversion and lower in neuroticism may find this easier, but we can all learn to built trust and deliver an authentic smile.

2. Mirror the other person’s communication style

Mirroring other people is a powerful way to build trust that is often under exercised or misused. In basic terms, mirroring is matching your actions with the actions of the person you want to build trust with. For example, if someone is speaking very slowly and softly, if you want to build rapport, it’s best that you speak slowly and softly back. Speaking really loudly and obnoxiously is going to make them feel uncomfortable. An easy rule of thumb I use is to simply match the energy of the person you are talking with.

Mirroring doesn’t just have to do with talking. You can mirror other people by your body posture, hand gestures, blurting out random sounds that people make, and a whole host of mirroring actions.

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Mirroring makes other people feel comfortable because you are communicating like they do. It makes people feel like they can relate to you, that you’re safe to be around, and that they can trust you.

Where people get mirroring wrong is when they try too hard to mirror somebody else. They go too overboard because they haven’t developed a way to naturally mirror other people. This is because they haven’t yet developed parts of their personality that enable them to deal with a large spectrum of communication styles.

For example, I personally am equally comfortable having a long, softly spoken, deeper conversation as I am a loud, quick-paced conversation where everyone is talking over the top of each other. Having a full range of experience has increased my capacity to mirror and connect with people.

Remember, authentic mirroring is less about trying to act like some else to manipulate them, and more about making people feel comfortable by communicating on their level.

3. Pay close attention to the person in front of you

Paying close attention doesn’t just mean you are pretending to look at their face, it means you are looking at them speak and are actively engaged emotionally.

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Empathetically show that you understand by looking into their eyes and slightly nod or softly respond with short verbal indications of your understanding of what they are saying. You don’t want to stare them down, but using an honest measure of eye contact shows you are actively paying attention and that you care about them.

When people know that you understand who they are, and their situation, they trust you. When they can feel that you are feeling what they are going through, they trust you. Paying close attention to a person will make them feel this way.

4. Be prepared to show vulnerability

In my opinion, the reason why people like Batman more than Superman is because Superman seems almost too unrealistic. He doesn’t seem vulnerable enough for us to be emotionally invested.

If you are open and honest with how you speak to people you’ll show strength, but you’ll also show vulnerability. Showing vulnerability doesn’t mean pointing out all your weaknesses, it means being real and allowing people to emotionally identify with you.

People trust vulnerability because it’s believable and it shows that you are willing to put yourself out there. You have some skin in the game so people trust that you are invested in what you are saying.

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5. Demonstrate that you do what you say

People looking for quick fixes to building trust have to realize that they actually have to be trustworthy. You can’t just smile and do all the rapport building tricks but then outright do something completely different to what you said you’d do.

If you can demonstrate that you do what you say you do in the beginning moments of meeting someone, then people are likely to trust in you based on what they observe.

All you need to do is keep being consistent in doing what you say and people will be able to trust you in that area.

Conclusion:

You can build trust with people very quickly if you are being truly authentic about connecting with them.

Featured photo credit: https://www.graphicstock.com via graphicstock.com

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5 Things You Can Do To Build Trust Quickly

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Last Updated on September 17, 2019

10 Simple Ways To Always Think Positive Thoughts

10 Simple Ways To Always Think Positive Thoughts

Positive thinking can lead to a lot of positive change in your life. Developing an optimistic outlook can be good for both your physical and mental health.

But sometimes, certain situations arise in life that makes it hard to keep a positive outlook. Take steps to make positive thinking become more like your second nature and you’ll reap the biggest benefits.

Here are 10 ways to make thinking positive thoughts easy:

1. Spend Time with Positive People

If you surround yourself with constant complainers, their negativity is likely to rub off on you.

Spend time with positive friends and family members to increase the likelihood that their positive thinking habits will become yours too. It’s hard to be negative when everyone around you is so positive.

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2. Take Responsibility for Your Behavior

When you encounter problems and difficulties in life, don’t play the role of the victim. Acknowledge your role in the situation and take responsibility for your behavior.

Accepting responsibility can help you learn from mistakes and prevent you from blaming others unfairly.

3. Contribute to the Community

One of the best ways to feel good about what you have, is to focus on what you have to give.

Volunteer in some manner and give back to the community. Helping others can give you a new outlook on the world and can assist you with positive thinking.

4. Read Positive and Inspirational Materials

Spend time each day reading something that encourages positive thinking. Read the Bible, spiritual material, or inspirational quotes to help you focus on what’s important to you in life. It can be a great way to start and end your day.

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Some recommendations for you:

5. Recognize and Replace Negative Thoughts

You won’t be successful at positive thinking if you’re still plagued by frequent negative thoughts. Learn to recognize and replace thoughts that are overly negative. Often, thoughts that include words like “always” and “never” signal that they aren’t true.

If you find yourself thinking something such as, “I always mess everything up,” replace it with something more realistic such as, “Sometimes I make mistakes but I learn from them.”

There’s no need to make your thoughts unrealistically positive, but instead, make them more realistic.

6. Establish and Work Toward Goals

It’s easier to be positive about problems and setbacks when you have goals that you’re working toward. Goals will give you motivation to overcome those obstacles when you encounter problems along the way. Without clear goals, it’s harder to make decisions and gauge your progress.

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Learn to set SMART goals to help you achieve more.

7. Consider the Consequences of Negativity

Spend some time thinking about the consequences of negative thinking. Often, it can become a self-fulfilling prophecy.

For example, a person who thinks, “I probably won’t get this job interview,” may put less effort into the interview. As a result, he may decrease his chances of getting the job.

Create a list of all the ways negative thinking impacts your life. It likely influences your behavior, your relationships, and your feelings. Then, create a list of the ways in which positive thinking could be beneficial.

8. Offer Compliments to Others

Look for reasons to compliment others. Be genuine in your praise and compliments, but offer it frequently. This will help you look for the good in other people.

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9. Create a Daily Gratitude List

If you start keeping a daily gratitude list, you’ll start noticing exactly how much you have to be thankful for. This can help you focus on the positive in your life instead of thinking about all the bad things that have happened in the day.

Getting in the habit of showing an attitude of gratitude makes positive thinking more of a habit. Here’re 40 Simple Ways To Practice Gratitude.

10. Practice Self-Care

Take good care of yourself and you’ll be more equipped to think positively.

Get plenty of rest and exercise and practice managing your stress well. Taking care of your physical and mental health will provide you with more energy to focus on positive thinking.

Learn about these 30 Self-Care Habits for a Strong and Healthy Mind, Body and Spirit.

More About Staying Positive

Featured photo credit: DESIGNECOLOGIST via unsplash.com

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