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5 Things You Can Do To Build Trust Quickly

5 Things You Can Do To Build Trust Quickly

I was selling products all day and was finishing up talking to this customer when he paused, looked straight into my eyes, and said, ‘A good man you are, there’s only a couple of us left.’ Then he walked away with his wife.

I immediately thought to myself how strange it was to hear a customer speak from the heart to a sales person. A flood of memories from all the different times I had built trust with people, very quickly after meeting them, came to mind. This experience triggered me to clearly see the patterns of trust building that I’ve used throughout my life.

Based on my intuitive insight, and following up with some psychology research, I want to give you 5 things that you can do to build trust quickly.

1. Show your authentic smile

Research shows that genuine smiles, the kind of smiles that engage the muscles around the eyes, are indicators of trustworthiness.

The reason I call it your authentic smile is because it has to come from the emotional capacity within you. Every time that I’ve been able to build trust quickly, I’ve exhibited high amounts of positive emotion that naturally produces a smile on my face.

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What I’ve caught myself doing that I find to be effective, which you can do too, is that I prime my emotions. This means that I consciously regulate my emotions before or after an event. I think through how I feel and I try to focus on something that I can approach with a positive disposition.

For example, I might think to myself that I get to meet lots of interesting customers and I get to connect with them. This thought allows me to focus on connecting with other people, and instead of focusing on myself, I now have built an emotional capacity to connect with others. This enables me to experience more positive emotion, leading to me showing my authentic smile, and people trusting my face.

I know that people who are higher in extraversion and lower in neuroticism may find this easier, but we can all learn to built trust and deliver an authentic smile.

2. Mirror the other person’s communication style

Mirroring other people is a powerful way to build trust that is often under exercised or misused. In basic terms, mirroring is matching your actions with the actions of the person you want to build trust with. For example, if someone is speaking very slowly and softly, if you want to build rapport, it’s best that you speak slowly and softly back. Speaking really loudly and obnoxiously is going to make them feel uncomfortable. An easy rule of thumb I use is to simply match the energy of the person you are talking with.

Mirroring doesn’t just have to do with talking. You can mirror other people by your body posture, hand gestures, blurting out random sounds that people make, and a whole host of mirroring actions.

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Mirroring makes other people feel comfortable because you are communicating like they do. It makes people feel like they can relate to you, that you’re safe to be around, and that they can trust you.

Where people get mirroring wrong is when they try too hard to mirror somebody else. They go too overboard because they haven’t developed a way to naturally mirror other people. This is because they haven’t yet developed parts of their personality that enable them to deal with a large spectrum of communication styles.

For example, I personally am equally comfortable having a long, softly spoken, deeper conversation as I am a loud, quick-paced conversation where everyone is talking over the top of each other. Having a full range of experience has increased my capacity to mirror and connect with people.

Remember, authentic mirroring is less about trying to act like some else to manipulate them, and more about making people feel comfortable by communicating on their level.

3. Pay close attention to the person in front of you

Paying close attention doesn’t just mean you are pretending to look at their face, it means you are looking at them speak and are actively engaged emotionally.

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Empathetically show that you understand by looking into their eyes and slightly nod or softly respond with short verbal indications of your understanding of what they are saying. You don’t want to stare them down, but using an honest measure of eye contact shows you are actively paying attention and that you care about them.

When people know that you understand who they are, and their situation, they trust you. When they can feel that you are feeling what they are going through, they trust you. Paying close attention to a person will make them feel this way.

4. Be prepared to show vulnerability

In my opinion, the reason why people like Batman more than Superman is because Superman seems almost too unrealistic. He doesn’t seem vulnerable enough for us to be emotionally invested.

If you are open and honest with how you speak to people you’ll show strength, but you’ll also show vulnerability. Showing vulnerability doesn’t mean pointing out all your weaknesses, it means being real and allowing people to emotionally identify with you.

People trust vulnerability because it’s believable and it shows that you are willing to put yourself out there. You have some skin in the game so people trust that you are invested in what you are saying.

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5. Demonstrate that you do what you say

People looking for quick fixes to building trust have to realize that they actually have to be trustworthy. You can’t just smile and do all the rapport building tricks but then outright do something completely different to what you said you’d do.

If you can demonstrate that you do what you say you do in the beginning moments of meeting someone, then people are likely to trust in you based on what they observe.

All you need to do is keep being consistent in doing what you say and people will be able to trust you in that area.

Conclusion:

You can build trust with people very quickly if you are being truly authentic about connecting with them.

Featured photo credit: https://www.graphicstock.com via graphicstock.com

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5 Things You Can Do To Build Trust Quickly

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Last Updated on July 18, 2019

What Makes People Happy? 20 Secrets of “Always Happy” People

What Makes People Happy? 20 Secrets of “Always Happy” People

Some people just seem to float through life with a relentless sense of happiness – through the toughest of times, they’re unfazed and aloof, stopping to smell the roses and drinking out of a glass half full.

They may not have much to be happy about, but the simplicity behind that fact itself may make them happy.

It’s all a matter of perspective, conscious effort and self-awareness. Listed below are a number of reasons why some people are always happy.

1. They Manage Their Expectations

They’re not crushed when they don’t get what they want – or misled into expecting to get the most out of every situation. They approach every situation pragmatically, hoping for the best but being prepared for the worst.

2. They Don’t Set Unrealistic Standards

Similar to the last point, they don’t live their lives in a constant pursuit towards impossible visions of perfection, only to always find themselves falling short of what they want.

3. They Don’t Take Anything for Granted

Happiness rests with feeling fulfilled – those who fail to stop and appreciate what they have every now and again will never experience true fulfillment.

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4. They’re Not Materialistic

There are arguing viewpoints on whether or not money can really buy happiness; if it can, then we know from experience that we can never be satisfied because there will always be something newer or better that we want. Who has ever had enough money?

5. They Don’t Dwell

They don’t sweat the small things or waste time worrying about things that don’t really matter at the end of the day. They don’t let negative thoughts latch onto them and drain them or distract them. Life’s too short to worry.

6. They Care About Themselves First

They’re independent, care for themselves and understand that they must put their needs first in order to accommodate the needs of others.

They indulge, aim to get what they want, make time for themselves and are extremely self-reliant.

7. They Enjoy the Little Things

They stop to smell the roses. They’re accustomed to find serenity when it’s available, to welcome entertainment or a stimulating discussion with a stranger when it crosses their path. They don’t overlook the small things in life that can be just as important.

8. They Can Adapt

They’re not afraid of change and they work to make the most out of new circumstances, good or bad. They thrive under pressure, are not overwhelmed easily and always embrace a change of pace.

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9. They Experiment

They try new things, experience new flavors and never shy away from something they have yet to experience. They never order twice from the same menu.

10. They Take Their Time

They don’t unnecessarily rush through life. They work on their own schedule to the extent that they can and maneuver through life at their own relaxing pace.

11. They Employ Different Perspectives

They’re not stuck in one perspective; a loss can result in a new opportunity, hitting rock bottom can mean that there’s no where to go but up.

12. They Seek to Learn

Their constant pursuit of knowledge keeps them inspired and interested in life. They cherish information and are on a life-long quest to learn as much as they can.

13. They Always Have a Plan

They don’t find themselves drifting without purpose. When something doesn’t go as planned, they have a plan for every letter in the alphabet to fall back on.

14. They Give Respect to Get It

They are respectful and, in turn, are seen as respectable; the respect they exude earns them the respect they deserve.

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15. They Consider Every Opportunity

They always have their eyes open for a new road, a new avenue worth exploring. They know how to recognize opportune moments and pounce on them to make the most of every situation. Success is inevitable for them.

16. They Always Seek to Improve

Perpetual self-improvement is the key towards their ongoing thirst for success. Whatever it is they do, they take pride in getting better and better, from social interactions to mundane tasks. Their pursuit at being the best eventually materializes.

17. They Don’t Take Life Too Seriously

They’re not ones to get offended easily over-analyze or complicate matters. They laugh at their own faults and misfortunes.

18. They Live in the Moment

They don’t live for tomorrow or dwell on what may have happened yesterday. Every day is a new opportunity, a new chapter. They live in the now, and in doing so, get the most out of every moment.

You can learn how to do so too: How to Live in the Moment and Stop Worrying About the Past or Future

19. They Say Yes

Much more often than they say no. They don’t have to be badgered to go out, don’t shy away from new opportunities or anything that may seem inconvenient.

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20. They’re Self-Aware

Most important, they’re wholly aware of themselves. They self-reflect and are conscious of their states of mind. If somethings bothering them, they fix it.

We’re all susceptible to feeling down every now and again, but we are all equipped with the necessary solutions that just have to be discovered.

Lack of confidence, inability to feel fulfilled, and susceptibility to stress are all matters that can be controlled through the way we handle our lives and perceive our circumstances.

Learn about How Self-Reflection Gives You a Happier and More Successful Life.

Final Thoughts

The main philosophy employed by the happiest includes the idea that life’s simply too short: life’s too short to let things get you down, to take things for granted, to pursue absolute and unrealistic perfection.

For some, employing these characteristics is a second nature – they do it without knowing. For others, a conscious effort must be put forth every now and again. Self-Awareness is key.

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Featured photo credit: Charles Postiaux via unsplash.com

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