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Why Complainers Are The Most Miserable Ones In The World

Why Complainers Are The Most Miserable Ones In The World

Maybe it was someone you worked with at a previous employer. Maybe it is someone you work with currently. Being around someone who always complains about everything in life can be exhausting. In fact, it is exhausting. Have you ever thought, “They have to be the most miserable person in the world?” Complainers are often very miserable, so here is why they are often the most miserable people in the world.

1. “I deserve more.”

This is often in the mindset of a complainer. They deserve more pay, more time, more this, more that. When you deal with a chronic complainer, you can bet you owe them something. You owe them stuff you never knew you owed them. They will often lack rationality and understanding of a situation. The Bottom Line: Don’t expect a complainer to be easy to please.

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2. “I deserve better.”

It may be better working conditions, better working schedules, better relationships, there is always something in the complainer’s mind that they deserve better. You could provide them with the best equipment, best cars, the best pay, the best homes, the best clothing, the best of everything, but they will always complain because they believe “they deserve better.” The Bottom Line: Don’t expect the complainers to be impressed with whatever you give them.

3. “It wasn’t my fault.”

It rarely is. In fact, it is rarely the complainers’ who have caused the issue at hand, in their minds. More times than not, the complainer never accepts responsibility for their actions or the consequences for their actions. So the copier at work suddenly quit working? Maybe the car is out of fuel. Either way, regardless of the circumstances, they will not see how it is their problem, or further more, their responsibility. The bottom line: Don’t expect a complainer to accept responsibility or own up to their mistakes.

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4. “I could have done it better.”

There are so many things to say about a chronic complainer. Can you imagine living a life with this mindset? Miserable is an understatement. Most of the time if you were to approach a complainer, you would hear them say how much better their ideas were. This may be the case, sometimes. The issue here is, they always see their ideas as the better alternatives. The Bottom Line: Don’t expect a complainer to accept the ideas of others. Their way is the only way, in their minds.

5. “If I can’t be happy, no one can be happy.”

A complainer, if not addressed promptly, can become a poisonous part of your team. Use caution and wisdom when dealing with them. The worst thing that could happen for your team, if a complainer is present, is if they infect other team members with their attitudes.

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6. “I don’t have to do that…” 

A complainer will often dictate what he/she will/will not do. They don’t abide by the rules, in their minds. When you approach someone on your staff who is constantly complaining, expect a hard, brick wall. Leadership will certainly be faced with challenges when dealing with someone who is a chronic complainer.

Did this sound negative? Maybe it sounded negative because of the mindset of those who are chronic complainers. Imagine living a life this miserable. I, as a former complainer, have found the solution to solving this major problem. Let’s face it: Complaining takes away a lot of the goodness in our lives. Grateful attitudes, contentment, and a positive outlook on life can change a complainer into a person with a great attitude.

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When dealing with a complainer, know they are miserable, first and foremost. Understand their may be some underlying issues leading up to their constant complaining.

Your attitude is contagious. Have a good attitude, display gratitude, and be positive!

Featured photo credit: Pixabay/Olichel via pixabay.com

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J. A. Davis

Founder & Owner of Enlivify Total Solutions, LLC

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Last Updated on June 19, 2019

6 Ways to Be a Successful Risk Taker and Take More Chances

6 Ways to Be a Successful Risk Taker and Take More Chances

I’ve stood on the edge of my own personal cliffs many times. Each time I jumped, something different happened. There were risks that started off great, but eventually faded. There were risks that left me falling until I hit the ground. There were risks that started slow, but built into massive successes.

Every risk is different, but every risk is the same. You need to have some fundamentals ready before you jump, but not too many.

It wouldn’t be a risk if you knew everything that was about to happen, would it? Here’re 6 ways to be a successful risk taker.

1. Understand That Failure Is Going to Happen a Lot

It’s part of life. Everything we do has failure attached to it. All successful people have stories of massive failure attached to them. Thinking that your risk is going to be pain free and run as smooth as silk is insane.

Expect some pain and failure. Actually, expect a lot of it. Expect the sleepless nights with crazy thoughts of insecurity that leave you trembling under the covers. It’s going to happen, no matter how positive you are about the risk you are about to take.

When failure hits, the only options are to keep going or quit. If you expect falling into a meadow of flowers and frolicking unicorns, then you’re going to immediately quit once you realize that getting to that meadow requires you to go through a rock filled cave filled with hungry bats.

2. Trust the Muse

Writing a story isn’t a big risk. It’s really just a risk on my time. So when I start writing a story, I’m scared it will be time wasted. Of course, it never really is. Even if the story doesn’t turn out fabulous, I still practiced.

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When I’ve taken risks in my life, the successful ones always seemed to happen when I followed the muse. Steven Pressfield describes the muse,

“The Muse demands depth. Shallow does not work for her. If we’re seeking her help, we can’t stay in the kiddie end. When we work, we have to go hard and go deep.”

The muse is a goddess who wants our attention and wants us to work on our passion.

If you’re taking a risk in anything, it’s assumed that there is some passion built up behind that risk. That passion, deep inside you, is the muse. Trust it, focus on it, listen to it.

The most successful articles and stories I write are the ones I’ve focused all my attention on. There were no interruptions during their creative development. I didn’t check my phone or go watch my Twitter feed. I was fully engaged in my work.

Trust the muse, focus your attention on your risk, let the ideas and path develop themselves, and leave the distractions at the side of the road.

3. Remember to Be Authentic

Taking a risk and then turning into something you’re not, is only going to lead to disaster. Whether you are risking a new relationship or new opportunity, you must be yourself throughout the entire process.

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How many times have you acted like you loved something just because the men or woman you just started going out with loved it?

For example, I’m not an office worker. I have an incredibly hard time working in a confined timeline (ie. 9-5). That’s why I write. I can do it whenever the mood strikes, I don’t have somebody breathing down my neck, telling me that I’m five minutes late, or missed a comma somewhere. I don’t have to walk on eggshells wondering if what I’m writing will get me fired or make me lose a promotion. I can just be myself, period.

One girlfriend didn’t understand that. She believed solely in the 9-5 motto, specifically something in human resources because that was a very stable job. I was scared for my future, but I stuck with the relationship because of my own insecurities and acted like I would do it to make her happy.

Here’s a tip: NEVER take away from your happiness to make somebody else satisfied (note I didn’t say happy).

Making somebody else happy will make you happy. Doing something to satisfy somebody is murder on your soul.

4. Don’t Take Any Risks While You’re Not Clearheaded

I’d been considering the risk for a couple weeks. It all sounded good. I was 22 and I could be rich in a couple of years. That’s what they were selling me, anyways.

One night, while at a house party with some friends, I found myself at a computer. A couple of my friends were standing nearby and asked me what I was doing. I told them I was considering starting my own business and it was only going to cost me $1,500.

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Of course, when a bunch of drunk people are surrounded by more drunk people, things get enthusiastic. It sounded like the best business venture in the world to everybody, including me. So I signed up and gave them my credit card number.

A few painful months and close to $4,000 dollars lost later, I quit the business. I was young and fell into the pyramid scheme trap. It was an expensive drunk decision.

Drinking heavily and making decisions has a proven track record of failure. So when you have something important to decide, don’t let your emotions take over your brain.

5. Fully Understand What You’re Risking

It was the start of my baseball comeback. I got a tryout with a professional scout and killed it. After the tryout, he talked to my girlfriend and myself, making sure we understood I would be gone for up to 6 months at a time. That strain on the relationship could be tough.

We understood. I left to play ball, chose to stay in the city I played in, and a year later we broke up. Not because of baseball, see point 3 above. Taking big risks can have massive impacts on everything in your life from relationships to money. Know what you’re risking before you take the risk.

If you believe the risk will be worth it or you have the support you need from your family, then go ahead and make the leap.

You can get more guidance on how to take calculated risks from this article: How to Take Calculated Risk to Achieve More and Become Successful

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6. Remember This Is Your One Shot Only

As far as we know officially, this is our one shot at life, so why not take some risks?

The top thing people are saddened by on their deathbeds are these regrets. They wish they did more, asked that girl in the coffee shop out, spoke out when they should have, or did what they were passionate about.

Don’t regret. Learn and experience. Live. Take the risks you believe in. Be yourself and make the world a better place.

Now go ahead, take that risk and be successful at it!

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Featured photo credit: Unsplash via unsplash.com

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