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Last Updated on August 26, 2020

10 Ways To Believe In Yourself Again When Life Gets Rough

10 Ways To Believe In Yourself Again When Life Gets Rough

It is a very well-known fact that if anyone wants to succeed in life, they must believe in themselves. We have to believe in ourselves and in our abilities because our inner faith will create our external results.

People easily lose faith in themselves when encountering setbacks, failure and fear. When you lack confidence in yourself, others will pick up on that and won’t take you seriously.

Not many people live the life that they have always wished to live; they give up on their life goals as soon as they encounter the first setback. One of the main causes for this is that they do not believe in themselves.

“Believe in yourself, and the rest will fall into place. Have faith in your own abilities, work hard and there is nothing you cannot accomplish.” – Brad Henry

The world that we are living in is extremely competitive and challenging, and people start to doubt themselves and their abilities when they come across failure. But a few failures are not the end. You must get back up again.

Here’re 10 ways to believe in yourself again:

1. Accept Your Current Situation

The first thing you need to do if you want to get back up and start believing in yourself again is to accept your current life situation. You have to make peace with how your life looks at the moment and what led to this situation that you are in.

Fighting with your situation won’t do you any good. Being resistant is pointless, so we must accept first. Only then will we have enough energy to change our life.

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“First, accept sadness. Realize that without losing, winning isn’t so great.” – Alyssa Milano.

2. Think About Your Past Success

If you are feeling down and out, use your past to get motivated again. Remember the time when you used to just kick butt. When you were awesome and you used to rock it! Put yourself in that past and think about the awesome things that you used to do.

Now remember that you can do it again. It is easy to think about the times when you got hurt, but it is just as easy to think about those times when you were successful as well. Use your past to your advantage.

“Every day is a new opportunity. You can build on yesterday’s success or put its failure behind and start over again. That’s the way life is, with a new game every day.”– Bob Feller.

3. Trust Yourself

This is one of the most important things that can help you get that belief and confidence back. All the energy, power, courage, strength and confidence is within you.

Spend time with yourself to access it, whether it be through meditation, journalling, or activities that make you trust in yourself again.

“Everything in the universe is within you. Ask all from yourself.” – Rumi

4. Talk with Yourself

We are the ones who create who we will become. We do that every day by our daily beliefs and self-talk. It’s really important that we talk to ourselves and motivate ourselves.

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We don’t ultimately need others’ approval. You deserve your own self-approval and supportive self-talk.

“The brain simply believes what you tell it most. And what you tell it about you, it will create. It has no choice.”
“If you tell yourself that you cannot, what can the only outcome be?” – Shad Helmstetter.

5. Don’t Let Fear Stop You

Fear stands for False Evidence that Appears Real.  It is the main thing that holds you back from believing in yourself again more than anything else.

Face your fears and don’t let them stop you from achieving your goals: What Your Fear of Being Alone Is Really About and How to Get over It

“Always do what you are afraid to do.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

6. Let Yourself Off the Hook

You have to forgive yourself for any failures or mistakes that you have committed in the past and move on.

You have to look at the future and stop living in the past. Be compassionate towards yourself.

7. Go with a Positive Attitude

Having a positive attitude towards everything is the quickest way in achieving that belief and confidence in yourself.

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Be thankful for whatever you are and whatever you have. Always have a positive approach and see the good in the world.

Here’re some inspirations for you: 60 Things To Be Thankful For In Life

8. Let a Life Coach Help You

A life coach is a professional that helps, supports, and guides you. A life coach can help you recognize your abilities and skills. They can help you refocus on your goals and remember your past successes.

When you’re full of doubt, your life coach will believe in you and help you to believe in yourself again.

Take a look at these 7 Reasons Why You Should Find a Life Coach to Reach Your Full Potential.

9. Keep Moving Forward And Never Look Back

“If you can’t fly then run, if you can’t run then walk, if you can’t walk then crawl, but whatever you do, you have to keep moving forward.” – Martin Luther King Jr.

There are going to be countless times in your life when you will feel down and you will feel like giving up. The voice in your head will tell you to stop and you will start to doubt yourself, but never listen to that voice.

Be strong and keep moving on. Never give up on yourself. You have to keep on going and eventually you will reach your destination. And when you do, you will realize how much more powerful you have become.

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Here’re some tips to help you move forward: 10 Strategies to Keep Moving Forward When Feeling Stuck

10. Let Life Move You

Let your life follow its own natural flow.  When you learn to follow your life’s flow, you’ll realize that life is marvellous and precious.

If you let your life guide you, it will shower you with its gifts and riches. You have to accept the life you are given and you have to learn to relax. Allow it to let you move in the direction you are meant to go, and you will find success.

“We all have different things that we go through in our everyday life, and it’s really important to know just at the end of the day, it doesn’t matter what you face, you know that you’re going to win at the end of the day. You got to believe in yourself. You got to believe in God, know that He’s going to get you through it.” – Kelly Rowland.

In addition to the above tips, here’re 8 steps to a more confident you:

More to Boost Your Confidence

Featured photo credit: Annie Spratt via unsplash.com

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Tom Casano

The CEO and Founder of Life Coach Spotter

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Last Updated on October 22, 2020

The Pros and Cons of Being Self-Critical (And How to Strike a Balance)

The Pros and Cons of Being Self-Critical (And How to Strike a Balance)

It is easy to hear the term “self-critical” and be immediately put off. After all, it’s difficult to be our own critics. However, utilizing self-criticism means taking a more self-aware path to ensure that you aren’t overlooking any possible areas of self-improvement.

Self-criticism affects your self-esteem and can be a useful tool to identify patterns of weakness that you can look to eradicate by adapting your behavior.

Self-Criticism Vs Self-Deprecation

In exploring the idea of self-criticism, one has to first consider what it means for the individual. It’s important to remember that there is a significant difference between being self-critical and being self-deprecating.

Self-deprecation is the act of putting oneself down, sometimes in an attempt to be humorous, but oftentimes out of a place of doubt and insecurity[1].

Self-deprecation erodes one’s confidence. It isn’t something to use lightly, as your own self-talk will play a part in defining your existence and how you are perceived, and, more importantly, in how you perceive yourself.

At the same time, you can’t take yourself so seriously that you are unable to make light of your mistakes as you pursue self-improvement. There is, of course, a balance to be struck, and both self-criticism and self-deprecation can be utilized in moderation.

Learning the difference between the two is the key to pursuing a productive life that will allow your successes to compound and your failures to be reduced. While self-deprecation can highlight flaws in your approach to life, self-criticism is more concerned with addressing those flaws and then acting to correct them.

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Self-Criticism: A Roadmap for Positive Change

Self-evaluation as a tool can open your eyes to the problematic behaviors that are derailing your goals. By identifying those behaviors, you can identify the steps to become the best version of yourself.

“Your thoughts affect how you feel and how you behave. The way you think has the power to become a self-fulfilling prophecy.” -Amy Morin[2]

This idea underlines the importance of not allowing self-criticism to blur into the realm of self-deprecating behavior. That will only work against you as you are attempting to constructively analyze your own behavior.

Auditing is necessary and good. Look at industries across the board and you will find that the most successful companies, people, and products have worked hard to refine their final output. Auditing your life, schedule, clients, contacts, and more will help you to identify the good from the bad.

If you don’t look back on what you’ve done and allow yourself to be self-critical of the areas that created more problems and less results, how will you learn how to avoid those missteps in your future endeavors?

Auditing with critical thoughts will allow you to build your own map to success by targeting behaviors that are ineffective in your pursuit of goals, and it will help you realize the changes that need to take place in order to correct for those inefficiencies.

The Pros of Being Self-Critical

Self-Criticism Opens Your Eyes to Areas of Improvement

In life, you ought to be your biggest fan and instill the confidence in yourself to show the world that you are worthy of the life that you’ve achieved up until now.

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At the same time, however, you need to have the self-awareness to understand that you can feel like a million bucks while still having room for improvement. Learn to be self-critical enough to increase your overall success in the pursuit of your goals.

You can check out this TED Talk with Tasha Eurich to learn more on how to improve your self-awareness:

We all need to look in the mirror at times and work to identify the deficiencies in our own behavior in order to find room for improvement. So many people live their lives in a manner that allows no room for self-reflection and thus are missing out on key opportunities.

For example, many people complain about not having the money to save for retirement, but instead of working to identify a solution, they assume that it cannot be fixed. Some of those individuals might find that if they challenge themselves and open themselves up to criticism, they may find the source of their problem.

Perhaps they don’t have a proper budget in place and are spending more money than they bring in on a week-to-week basis. Being self-critical would help them realize this.

I’d argue that if we all spent more energy evaluating our place in life, how we got there, and where we want to go, it would clear up what is missing from the equation.

Self-Criticism Allows You to Realize Your Potential

By working to analyze your own behaviors and identify areas that need to be improved upon, you will be able to better strive to reach your full potential in life and unlock success.

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Being self-critical will help you to go from where you are now to where you want to be, and it will increase your self-awareness. There are so many positives to be gained by adopting a self-critical attitude.

Read more about self-improvement: 42 Practical Ways to Improve Yourself

The Cons of Being Self-Critical

Self-Criticism Can Overemphasize Negatives

The problems that could arise if one is overly self-critical are not always clear, but there are a few issues that can pop up if you start being too hard on yourself.

If you are self-critical too often and don’t allow space in your own audit of yourself for praise, celebration, and reassurance in your victories, then you may be on a path of negative self-talk and perhaps even depression.

If you are constantly looking for what is wrong with your actions or pursuits while failing to see what you are doing right, then you aren’t utilizing self-criticism properly. While the line is thin, there is definitely a difference between appropriate, foundation-building self-criticism, and over-zealous, confidence-eroding self-deprecation.

Self-Criticism Can Lead to Negative Distortions of Yourself

One struggle I often see in individuals is with their own perception of self. If you have been raised to believe that you are a failure, for example, then you may not have a healthy expectation of yourself.

By being overly self-critical, you might be distorting your own self-image. The key here lies in utilizing the device of self-criticism correctly, which many people often do not do.

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If utilized properly, self-criticism can be a fantastic tool, but if used incorrectly, it can have devastating effects on your own self-worth and confidence.

Final Thoughts

When used properly, self-criticism can be a tool for success.

We must work hard to ensure that we are in fact exercising a constructive analysis of our own behavior and not falling into self-deprecation.

Unfortunately, it seems as though many view the idea of being self-critical with a negative connotation. However, it can be an extremely positive and fruitful exercise if pursued with the right mindset.

It helps tremendously when you have a community of friends and family who also help to uplift you and encourage you as you are pursuing your dreams in life.

In evaluating your own situation and in attempting to constructively self-criticize, you should also take a look at the people you surround yourself with to try and better understand if those individuals are helping you in your aspirations or if they are holding you back as you work to better yourself.

“We are the average of the five people we spend the most time with.” -Jim Rohn[3]

If you work to adopt a healthy version of self-criticism and avoid allowing it to delve into self-deprecation or self-doubt, then it will serve you well as a tool to lend support to your goals and aspirations.

More Tips About Building Self-Esteem

Featured photo credit: Elijah O’Donnell via unsplash.com

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