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What To Do If You Have A Bossy Boss

What To Do If You Have A Bossy Boss

Even though the words “boss” and “bossy” sound almost the same, they don’t necessarily have the same meaning. In fact, a good leader is one who is adaptable, flexible, and ultimately empowers their employees. However, not all of us are that lucky. So, what do you do if you do not have one of those good kind of bosses? First things first: don’t worry. There are things you can do to handle your bossy boss and still keep your sanity.

Here are 8 ways to deal with a bossy boss:

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1. Be respectful.

Asher Adelman, founder of eBossWatch states, “Bosses who are characterized as ‘too bossy’ tend to combine their assertiveness with unhealthy doses of disrespect and condescension.” While that is difficult to deal with as their employee, that does not mean you should stoop to their level. You should always show respect because it is the proper – and professional – thing to do.

2. Be assertive, not aggressive.

Although I just told you to be respectful, that doesn’t mean that you have to become a doormat either. There is definitely a difference between being assertive and aggressive. Using assertive language such as “I” and “we” will help you convey your opinions, in a respectful manner. “I” language takes ownership of your ideas, while “we” language creates an atmosphere with your boss that you are “in this together” – rather than a “me vs. you” battle of wills.

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3. Be logical, not emotional.

According to psychiatrist Dr. Milan Balakrishnanhey, bossy bosses are “self-centered, lack empathy, and have an exaggerated sense of self-importance.” Because of this, it is important to be logical, and not emotional when you speak to them. This is obviously easier said than done. It requires a lot of self-restraint. Remember, people who are bossy just get more agitated when they feel like negative emotions are being dumped on them; especially if it is in the form of criticism. So even if you want to give him/her the middle finger and shout a few four-letter-words … Don’t. Don’t let your emotions get the best of you. Keep your logical side in the driver’s seat.

4. Be a good listener.

Everyone feels better when they feel like someone is listening to them. And I mean really listening to them. Bossy bosses are no different. To be a good listener, you should start with eye contact, as well as positive and engaging body language. You will also want to repeat back or paraphrase what your boss says so that he/she will know that you actually heard the information. Being a good listener is just one small thing you can do to make your boss less defensive and less negative.

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5. Be a good “team player.”

The phrase “team player” is thrown around a lot in the business world. But it really is helpful when everyone works together. Your boss is probably creating an atmosphere where everyone does not want to hop on the wagon and follow the “captain” of the team. However, being argumentative and self-centered will only make a bossy boss more angry. So try to band together with your co-workers and persuade everyone to work as a team in a positive manner.

6. Be empathetic.

Empathy is one of the most under-utilized emotions in the world. Empathy lets us put ourselves in another person’s shoes and imagine what they are going through. For example, let’s say your boss is overweight, crazy, and illogical. As maddening as it may be, try to imagine how they got that way? Maybe they had mean and rude parents? Maybe they were abused as a child? You may never actually know. Chances are, if they have grown into a difficult person, then they probably haven’t had such a nice life. Try to re-frame it like that. It will help you feel a little less annoyed. Even if it’s only for a moment.

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7. Be the person who doesn’t take anything personally.

Psychologist Manasi Hassan offers the following remedy: “Don’t let your boss’ arrogance have a negative impact on your self-image. Once you have realized that it’s the boss’s ‘attitude’ don’t try hard to change it or let it affect the way you perceive yourself.” In other words, don’t take what your boss says or does personally. As I mentioned in #6, who knows what kind of life he/she has had? What they say or do has more to do with the kind of person they are. In other words, “It’s them, not you.”

8. Be a person who “flies under the radar” – if you can.

In some jobs, it’s possible to (more or less) stay out of the way. If you can minimize the face-to-face time with your boss – do it. If you can walk down another hallway to avoid passing his/her office – do it. If you don’t have to say anything at a meeting that might rile them up, then keep your mouth shut. Don’t put yourself in any unnecessary situations where you might bring unneeded negativity upon yourself … if you can.

Bossy bosses are never fun to work with. Hopefully, if you follow these 8 tips, you will have a more pleasant experience on the job.

More by this author

Carol Morgan

Dr. Carol Morgan is the owner of HerSideHisSide.com, a relationship and dating website that gives advice from both a male and female perspective. She's also a communication professor, dating & relationship coach, TV personality, speaker, and author.

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Last Updated on April 25, 2019

How to Write a Career Change Resume (With Examples)

How to Write a Career Change Resume (With Examples)

Shifting careers, tiny or big, can be paralyzing. Whether your desire for a career change is self-driven or involuntary, you can manage the panic and fear by understanding ‘why’ you are making the change.

Your ability to clearly and confidently articulate your transferable skills makes it easier for employers to understand how you are best suited for the job or industry.

A well written career change resume that shows you have read the job description and markets your transferable skills can increase your success for a career change.

3 Steps to Prepare Your Mind Before Working on the Resume

Step 1: Know Your ‘Why’

Career changes can be an unnerving experience. However, you can lessen the stress by making informed decisions through research.

One of the best ways to do this is by conducting informational interviews.[1] Invest time to gather information from diverse sources. Speaking to people in the career or industry that you’re pursuing will help you get clarity and check your assumptions.

Here are some questions to help you get clear on your career change:

  • What’s your ideal work environment?
  • What’s most important to you right now?
  • What type of people do you like to work with?
  • What are the work skills that you enjoy doing the most?
  • What do you like to do so much that you lose track of time?
  • Whose career inspires you? What is it about his/her career that you admire?
  • What do you dislike about your current role and work environment?

Step 2: Get Clear on What Your Transferable Skills Are[2]

The data gathered from your research and informational interviews will give you a clear picture of the career change that you want. There will likely be a gap between your current experience and the experience required for your desired job. This is your chance to tell your personal story and make it easy for recruiters to understand the logic behind your career change.

Make a list and describe your existing skills and experience. Ask yourself:

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What experience do you have that is relevant to the new job or industry?

Include any experience e.g., work, community, volunteer, or helping a neighbour. The key here is ANY relevant experience. Don’t be afraid to list any tasks that may seem minor to you right now. Remember this is about showcasing the fact that you have experience in the new area of work.

What will the hiring manager care about and how can you demonstrate this?

Based on your research you’ll have an idea of what you’ll be doing in the new job or industry. Be specific and show how your existing experience and skills make you the best candidate for the job. Hiring managers will likely scan your resume in less than 7 seconds. Make it easy for them to see the connection between your skills and the skills that are needed.

Clearly identifying your transferable skills and explaining the rationale for your career change shows the employer that you are making a serious and informed decision about your transition.

Step 3: Read the Job Posting

Each job application will be different even if they are for similar roles. Companies use different language to describe how they conduct business. For example, some companies use words like ‘systems’ while other companies use ‘processes’.

When you review the job description, pay attention to the sections that describe WHAT you’ll be doing and the qualifications/skills. Take note of the type of language and words that the employer uses. You’ll want to use similar language in your resume to show that your experience meets their needs.

5 Key Sections on Your Career Change Resume (Example)

The content of the examples presented below are tailored for a high school educator who wants to change careers to become a client engagement manager, however, you can easily use the same structure for your career change resume.

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Don’t forget to write a well crafted cover letter for your career change to match your updated resume. Your career change cover letter will provide the context and personal story that you’re not able to show in a resume.

1. Contact Information and Header

Create your own letterhead that includes your contact information. Remember to hyperlink your email and LinkedIn profile. Again, make it easy for the recruiter to contact you and learn more about you.

Example:

Jill Young

Toronto, ON | [email protected] | 416.222.2222 | LinkedIn Profile

2. Qualification Highlights or Summary

This is the first section that recruiters will see to determine if you meet the qualifications for the job. Use the language from the job posting combined with your transferable skills to show that you are qualified for the role.

Keep this section concise and use 3 to 4 bullets. Be specific and focus on the qualifications needed for the specific job that you’re applying to. This section should be tailored for each job application. What makes you qualified for the role?

Example:

Qualifications Summary

  • Experienced managing multiple stakeholder interests by building a strong network of relationships to support a variety of programs
  • Experienced at resolving problems in a timely and diplomatic manner
  • Ability to work with diverse groups and ensure collaboration while meeting tight timelines

3. Work Experience

Only present experiences that are relevant to the job posting. Focus on your specific transferable skills and how they apply to the new role.

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How this section is structured will depend on your experience and the type of career change you are making.

For example, if you are changing industries you may want to list your roles before the company name. However, if you want to highlight some of the big companies you’ve worked with then you may want to list the company name first. Just make sure that you are consistent throughout your resume.

Be clear and concise. Use 1 to 4 bullets to highlight your relevant work experiences for each job you list on your resume. Ensure that the information demonstrates your qualifications for the new job. Remember to align all the dates on your resume to the right margin.

Example:

Work Experience

Theater Production Manager (2018 – present)

YourLocalTheater

  • Collaborated with diverse groups of people to ensure a successful production while meeting tight timelines

4. Education

List your formal education in this section. For example, the name of the degrees you received and the school who issued it. To eliminate biases, I would recommend removing the year you graduated.

Example:

Education

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  • Bachelor of Education, University of Western Ontario
  • Bachelor of Theater Studies with Honors, University of British Columbia

5. Other Activities or Interests

When you took an inventory of your transferable skills, what experiences were relevant to your new career path (that may not fit in the other resume sections?).

Example:

Other Activities

  • Mentor, Pathways to Education
  • Volunteer lead for coordinating all community festival vendors

Bonus Tips

Remember these core resume tips to help you effectively showcase your transferable skills:

  • CAR (Context Action Result) method. Remember that each bullet on your resume needs to state the situation, the action you took and the result of your experience.
  • Font. Use modern Sans Serif fonts like Tahoma, Verdana, or Arial.
  • White space. Ensure that there is enough white space on your resume by adjusting your margins to a minimum of 1.5 cm. Your resume should be no more than two pages long.
  • Tailor your resume for each job posting. Pay attention to the language and key words used on the job posting and adjust your resume accordingly. Make the application process easy on yourself by creating your own resume template. Highlight sections that you need to tailor for each job application.
  • Get someone else to review your resume. Ideally you’d want to have someone with industry or hiring experience to provide you with insights to hone your resume. However, you also want to have someone proofread your resume for grammar and spelling errors.

The Bottom Line

It’s essential that you know why you want to change careers. Setting this foundation not only helps you with your resume, but can also help you to change your cover letter, adjust your LinkedIn profile, network during your job search, and during interviews.

Ensure that all the content on your resume is relevant for the specific job you’re applying to.

Remember to focus on the job posting and your transferable skills. You have a wealth of experience to draw from – don’t discount any of it! It’s time to showcase and brand yourself in the direction you’re moving towards!

More Resources to Help You Change Career Swiftly

Featured photo credit: Parker Byrd via unsplash.com

Reference

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