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After I Read This, I Figured It’d Be Better Not To Know The Gender Of the Baby

After I Read This, I Figured It’d Be Better Not To Know The Gender Of the Baby

Is it a boy or a girl? Everyone will be asking you that as soon as they know your family is expecting a baby. This will continue right up to the birth and then all will be revealed! But only if you have decided not to discover or reveal the gender of your baby. Why on earth would you want to do that?

There are lots of good, sound reasons why. Here are 8 of them.

1. You take a stand against gender stereotyping

If you do not know the sex of the baby, you are keeping things as gender neutral as possible. This can help you concentrate on what type of person your child will be and how you will influence their character when growing up. Ian McEwan is in favor of not finding out the sex either.

Bonding is not affected negatively. When talking about the new arrival, you can refer to your baby as a boy or a girl as the mood takes you. It enriches the expectation that no matter what their sex is, their birth is going to bring great joy.

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In India, where gender is sometimes a matter of life and death, the Supreme Court has ruled that ultrasounds used for determining the sex of a fetus are illegal.

“Girls can wear jeans and cut their hair short and wear shirts and boots because it’s okay to be a boy; for girls it’s like promotion. But for a boy to look like a girl is degrading, according to you, because secretly you believe that being a girl is degrading.” – Ian McEwan.

2. You do not have to worry about a gender reveal party

This will save you a lot of hassle and expense. In addition, you will not be showered with blue or pink outfits, accessories and gadgets.

3. You can have a lot of fun choosing the baby’s name

Now that you have no idea which way it will go, you can both have a great time thinking about possible names. You never have to bother with unisex baby names which are somewhat limited, such as Ashley, Ashton, Leslie, Sydney, Cameron, or Wesley. When planning a boy’s name, bear in mind what he may have to put up with at school. It can be a great weapon for bullies. The choice of a girl’s name is much less restricted.

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4. You cannot totally rely on an ultrasound test

Just in case you are having doubts during the nine month wait, console yourself with the fact that the US is not always 100% accurate. In fact, experts say that there is a margin of error of 15%, as a lot depends on the position of the baby and its movements.

If your medical insurance does not cover this type of test, think of the savings and how they can be spent on your new arrival

5. You will not have to listen to old wives’ tales

Once people know the sex of the baby, they go on and on about your shape and the way you walk. Lots of popular beliefs which go back a long time. The most notorious are those quoted in the Distaff Gospels which date back to 1470. They say that if you start walking with your right foot first, you will have a boy. If you start with the left foot, you will have a girl.

But modern day ‘old wives’ go one better. They pretend to be able to guess the sex by analyzing your morning sickness, heartburn and, of course, the shape of your bump!

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6. You can plan on recycling

Did you know that the parents who decide not to discover their babies’ gender are known as Team Green? They are adding a new color to the scene. Getting away from the pink for a girl and blue for a boy is just the beginning in the mission to make gender more neutral. But it is still controversial and many parents are reluctant to go down the Team Green route, especially for their firstborn.

However, if you do decide to go Team Green, just think of the savings and how you can recycle all this stuff again and again for all those brothers and sisters who will follow. You can use your gender neuter cradle, bedding, stroller and toys again and again.

7. Variations on a theme

Some couples cannot reach an agreement. The father may want to know and book the US and not tell the mother because she does not want to know, or vice versa. Then there is the whole question of what you tell all the curious relatives.

If you want to be traditional, then there is no need to know, like the zillions of parents down the ages. The great thing about it is that there is no gender socialization going on during the pregnancy. It is comforting to know that your child is enjoying nine gender-free months.

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8. Pre-birth gender conditioning is reduced

Mothers who know the sex of their baby address and talk to it differently. They also interpret movements accordingly. Vigorous kicking will be a footballer, if it is a boy. The girl on the other hand will become a brilliant ballerina! The gender role stereotyping has already begun before the baby is even born. This is one the great arguments in favor of not knowing, especially if you think we are too gender oriented as a society.

As we have seen, not knowing the sex of your baby has enormous advantages and can lead to more anticipation, excitement and joy on the big day. It puts the emphasis squarely on what kind of person your baby is going to be, whether it is a boy or a girl.

 

Featured photo credit: Baby Savannah/ Eduardo Merille via flickr.com

More by this author

Robert Locke

Author of Ziger the Tiger Stories, a health enthusiast specializing in relationships, life improvement and mental health.

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Last Updated on September 18, 2020

7 Simple Rules to Live by to Get in Shape in Two Weeks

7 Simple Rules to Live by to Get in Shape in Two Weeks

Learning how to get in shape and set goals is important if you’re looking to live a healthier lifestyle and get closer to your goal weight. While this does require changes to your daily routine, you’ll find that you are able to look and feel better in only two weeks.

Over the years, I’ve learned a lot about what it takes to get in shape. Although anyone can cover the basics (eat right and exercise), there are some things that I could only learn through trial and error. Let’s cover some of the most important points for how to get in shape in two weeks.

1. Exercise Daily

It is far easier to make exercise a habit if it is a daily one. If you aren’t exercising at all, I recommend starting by exercising a half hour every day. When you only exercise a couple times per week, it is much easier to turn one day off into three days off, a week off, or a month off.

If you are already used to exercising, switching to three or four times a week to fit your schedule may be preferable, but it is a lot harder to maintain a workout program you don’t do every day.

Be careful to not repeat the same exercise routine each day. If you do an intense ab workout one day, try switching it up to general cardio the next. You can also squeeze in a day of light walking to break up the intensity.

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If you’re a morning person, check out these morning exercises that will start your day off right.

2. Duration Doesn’t Substitute for Intensity

Once you get into the habit of regular exercise, where do you go if you still aren’t reaching your goals? Most people will solve the problem by exercising for longer periods of time, turning forty-minute workouts into two hour stretches. Not only does this drain your time, but it doesn’t work particularly well.

One study shows that “exercising for a whole hour instead of a half does not provide any additional loss in either body weight or fat”[1].

This is great news for both your schedule and your levels of motivation. You’ll likely find it much easier to exercise for 30 minutes a day instead of an hour. In those 30 minutes, do your best to up the intensity to your appropriate edge to get the most out of the time.

3. Acknowledge Your Limits

Many people get frustrated when they plateau in their weight loss or muscle gaining goals as they’re learning how to get in shape. Everyone has an equilibrium and genetic set point where their body wants to remain. This doesn’t mean that you can’t achieve your fitness goals, but don’t be too hard on yourself if you are struggling to lose weight or put on muscle.

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Acknowledging a set point doesn’t mean giving up, but it does mean realizing the obstacles you face.

Expect to hit a plateau in your own fitness results[2]. When you expect a plateau, you can manage around it so you can continue your progress at a more realistic rate. When expectations meet reality, you can avoid dietary crashes.

4. Eat Healthy, Not Just Food That Looks Healthy

Know what you eat. Don’t fuss over minutia like whether you’re getting enough Omega 3’s or tryptophan, but be aware of the big things. Look at the foods you eat regularly and figure out whether they are healthy or not. Don’t get fooled by the deceptively healthy snacks just pretending to be good for you.

The basic nutritional advice includes:

  • Eat unprocessed foods
  • Eat more veggies
  • Use meat as a side dish, not a main course
  • Eat whole grains, not refined grains[3]

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Eat whole grains when you want to learn how to get in shape.

    5. Watch Out for Travel

    Don’t let a four-day holiday interfere with your attempts when you’re learning how to get in shape. I don’t mean that you need to follow your diet and exercise plan without any excursion, but when you are in the first few weeks, still forming habits, be careful that a week long break doesn’t terminate your progress.

    This is also true of schedule changes that leave you suddenly busy or make it difficult to exercise. Have a backup plan so you can be consistent, at least for the first month when you are forming habits.

    If travel is on your schedule and can’t be avoided, make an exercise plan before you go[4], and make sure to pack exercise clothes and an exercise mat as motivation to keep you on track.

    6. Start Slow

    Ever start an exercise plan by running ten miles and then puking your guts out? Maybe you aren’t that extreme, but burnout is common early on when learning how to get in shape. You have a lifetime to be healthy, so don’t try to go from couch potato to athletic superstar in a week.

    If you are starting a running regime, for example, run less than you can to start. Starting strength training? Work with less weight than you could theoretically lift. Increasing intensity and pushing yourself can come later when your body becomes comfortable with regular exercise.

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    7. Be Careful When Choosing a Workout Partner

    Should you have a workout partner? That depends. Workout partners can help you stay motivated and make exercising more fun. But they can also stop you from reaching your goals.

    My suggestion would be to have a workout partner, but when you start to plateau (either in physical ability, weight loss/gain, or overall health) and you haven’t reached your goals, consider mixing things up a bit.

    If you plateau, you may need to make changes to continue improving. In this case it’s important to talk to your workout partner about the changes you want to make, and if they don’t seem motivated to continue, offer a thirty day break where you both try different activities.

    I notice that guys working out together tend to match strength after a brief adjustment phase. Even if both are trying to improve, something seems to stall improvement once they reach a certain point. I found that I was able to lift as much as 30-50% more after taking a short break from my regular workout partner.

    Final Thoughts

    Learning how to get in shape in as little as two weeks sounds daunting, but if you’re motivated and have the time and energy to devote to it, it’s certainly possible.

    Find an exercise routine that works for you, eat healthy, drink lots of water, and watch as the transformation begins.

    More Tips on Getting in Shape

    Featured photo credit: Alexander Redl via unsplash.com

    Reference

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