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15 Things No One Will Tell You About Fatherhood

15 Things No One Will Tell You About Fatherhood

Becoming a father has been one of the greatest accomplishments in my life. And l know most fathers can relate to that. The moment you hear these words, “honey, I’m pregnant!,” to the sound of your baby entering the world (insert newborn crying here), your life changes completely.

You begin to learn about fatherhood and what it really is like, which is a great thing to do.

Although you will receive great parenting advice from other parents especially fathers, there are some things you most likely will not hear until you experience them as a dad.

Here 15 things you should be prepared to experience as a father.

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1. If you thought you knew how to care for a baby, think again.

Even though you will have an idea about how to take care of your baby, it is just the beginning. Taking care of your newborn will not be easy. You will have to learn as you go and seek help when needed. Once your newborn arrives, you will not have to master the art of changing diapers so you can do it with care and without causing a mess, especially when its really poopy.

2. Sleep will become a luxury for you.

You will have to stay up for those nights when your newborn is crying and you can not figure out what the issue with him/her is. And the best thing is you probably have to go to work in the morning.

3. Time management will have to become a skill

That is, if you want to be active in your baby’s life. Planning everything like you used to do will be hard, real hard. It will take a lot of getting used to having things not go as planned. You will need to learn when to say yes and no invitations, personal activities, etc.

4.  After meeting your baby for the first time your world will never be the same.

Your life will never be the same. Everything changes! For the better, don’t worry.

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5. Sex after pregnancy will be a topic of discussion with your significant other.

Be prepared to go without getting any for at LEAST 6 weeks. I think that’s the recommended time after post-patum. Your significant other might not have this on their mind at all. Read this article.

6. Sacrifices will need to be made.

You will have to make sacrifices, the loud sex, partying, etc. Your significant other’s breast will also be off limit for a while.

7. You will become a little more emotional.

I never knew how emotional l was until l saw our newborn. I melted like chocolate, and instantly realized there is that soft spot in me that my baby touches in a different way. You will also experience it.

8. You will feel accomplished.

And this accomplishment is not like winning the lottery. Its more about your self esteem, knowing you and your significant other have added a new addition to this world.

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9. You will see things in a new way, dad vision is different than man vision.

What used to be okay, will now have a different interpretation. When your newborn cries, its going to be different from all other baby cries.

10. You will not have complete conversations anymore.

Your baby will interrupt when you are having conversations with your significant other. Sometimes, this happens when you are “busy” in the bedroom. (of course that’s after the 6 weeks)

11. You will become a teacher. And your actions will speak louder than your words.

Your kids will do what you do, not what you tell them to do. Everything you do will be watched, and done in the exact same manner by your baby as he/she grows.

12. It is hard.

Yes, very hard, but its worth the journey and the experience.

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13. You have to be ready to entertain your kids when they are bored.

Having a lot of different bedtime stories, and entertaining ideas will be part of your toolbox for a while.

14. No more being selfish.

You will not only have to think about yourself anymore, but also think about the mother of your child, and your new bundle of joy.

15. You will need help one way or another.

It is okay to accept that you can not do it all. It’s impossible to do it all, and having your significant other help you will be a HUGE bonus.

Featured photo credit: PublicDomainPictures via pixabay.com

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Last Updated on March 13, 2019

How to Get out of a Rut: 12 Useful Ways to Get Unstuck

How to Get out of a Rut: 12 Useful Ways to Get Unstuck

Have you gotten into a rut before? Or are you in a rut right now?

You know you’re in a rut when you run out of ideas and inspiration. I personally see a rut as a productivity vacuum. It might very well be a reason why you aren’t getting results. Even as you spend more time on your work, you can’t seem to get anything constructive done. While I’m normally productive, I get into occasional ruts (especially when I’ve been working back-to-back without rest). During those times, I can spend an entire day in front of the computer and get nothing done. It can be quite frustrating.

Over time, I have tried and found several methods that are helpful to pull me out of a rut. If you experience ruts too, whether as a working professional, a writer, a blogger, a student or other work, you will find these useful. Here are 12 of my personal tips to get out of ruts:

1. Work on the small tasks.

When you are in a rut, tackle it by starting small. Clear away your smaller tasks which have been piling up. Reply to your emails, organize your documents, declutter your work space, and reply to private messages.

Whenever I finish doing that, I generate a positive momentum which I bring forward to my work.

2. Take a break from your work desk.

Get yourself away from your desk and go take a walk. Go to the washroom, walk around the office, go out and get a snack.

Your mind is too bogged down and needs some airing. Sometimes I get new ideas right after I walk away from my computer.

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3. Upgrade yourself

Take the down time to upgrade yourself. Go to a seminar. Read up on new materials (#7). Pick up a new language. Or any of the 42 ways here to improve yourself.

The modern computer uses different typefaces because Steve Jobs dropped in on a calligraphy class back in college. How’s that for inspiration?

4. Talk to a friend.

Talk to someone and get your mind off work for a while.

Talk about anything, from casual chatting to a deep conversation about something you really care about. You will be surprised at how the short encounter can be rejuvenating in its own way.

5. Forget about trying to be perfect.

If you are in a rut, the last thing you want to do is step on your own toes with perfectionist tendencies.

Just start small. Do what you can, at your own pace. Let yourself make mistakes.

Soon, a little trickle of inspiration will come. And then it’ll build up with more trickles. Before you know it, you have a whole stream of ideas.

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6. Paint a vision to work towards.

If you are continuously getting in a rut with your work, maybe there’s no vision inspiring you to move forward.

Think about why you are doing this, and what you are doing it for. What is the end vision in mind?

Make it as vivid as possible. Make sure it’s a vision that inspires you and use that to trigger you to action.

7. Read a book (or blog).

The things we read are like food to our brain. If you are out of ideas, it’s time to feed your brain with great materials.

Here’s a list of 40 books you can start off with. Stock your browser with only the feeds of high quality blogs, such as Lifehack.org, DumbLittleMan, Seth Godin’s Blog, Tim Ferris’ Blog, Zen Habits or The Personal Excellence Blog.

Check out the best selling books; those are generally packed with great wisdom.

8. Have a quick nap.

If you are at home, take a quick nap for about 20-30 minutes. This clears up your mind and gives you a quick boost. Nothing quite like starting off on a fresh start after catching up on sleep.

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9. Remember why you are doing this.

Sometimes we lose sight of why we do what we do, and after a while we become jaded. A quick refresher on why you even started on this project will help.

What were you thinking when you thought of doing this? Retrace your thoughts back to that moment. Recall why you are doing this. Then reconnect with your muse.

10. Find some competition.

Nothing quite like healthy competition to spur us forward. If you are out of ideas, then check up on what people are doing in your space.

Colleagues at work, competitors in the industry, competitors’ products and websites, networking conventions.. you get the drill.

11. Go exercise.

Since you are not making headway at work, might as well spend the time shaping yourself up.

Sometimes we work so much that we neglect our health and fitness. Go jog, swim, cycle, whichever exercise you prefer.

As you improve your physical health, your mental health will improve, too. The different facets of ourselves are all interlinked.

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Here’re 15 Tips to Restart the Exercise Habit (and How to Keep It).

12. Take a good break.

Ruts are usually signs that you have been working too long and too hard. It’s time to get a break.

Beyond the quick tips above, arrange for a 1-day or 2-days of break from your work. Don’t check your (work) emails or do anything work-related. Relax and do your favorite activities. You will return to your work recharged and ready to start.

Contrary to popular belief, the world will not end from taking a break from your work. In fact, you will be much more ready to make an impact after proper rest. My best ideas and inspiration always hit me whenever I’m away from my work.

Take a look at this to learn the importance of rest: The Importance of Scheduling Downtime

More Resources About Getting out of a Rut

Featured photo credit: Joshua Earle via unsplash.com

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