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10 Struggles Only the Mother of A Teenage Boy Would Understand

10 Struggles Only the Mother of A Teenage Boy Would Understand

Growth is a part of life. When your son reaches that point when his not playing with toys anymore but swings to X-box and Play Station, you start having some cause for concern for how much his mentality has changed so fast. Here are some struggles only mothers of teenage boy would understand.

1. He doesn’t seem to be listening anymore

Whether he is playing video games or listening to songs on his I-pod, he rarely is paying attention to everything you say. He seems engrossed to a world of his own sounds, the one he has defined for himself, and that may not include the sound of you, his mother.

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2. He doesn’t make it easier for you to raise him

You think as he grows older he will make it easier for you to nurture him; maybe he will mature and take more responsibilities. But it isn’t easier for you now. Rather you have to respond to any negative conduct he develops with forgiveness, humor, attentiveness and encouragement.

3. He breaks all the rules

A simple rule as getting home at a particular time doesn’t apply to him anymore. Actually getting home by 8 pm is not so simple a rule anymore. No screen nights and doing more household chores like taking out the trash are really difficult tasks or routines for him to adhere to.

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4. He is growing faster than you know it

His voice is getting deeper. He is grabbing his meals and throwing them into his body like a whale. He is making double orders at restaurants and his muscles are popping out. You have to enlarge your refrigerator and buy more supplies to adjust to his new demands.

5. He has external confidantes

You expect or want him to get closer to you, perhaps treat you the same way he treats the ladies he is becoming attracted to. You want him to give you deeper respect and share his stories with you, but the opposite is the case.

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6. He will make more mistakes

As much as you do not like this point, you have to understand you also passed through that period of teenage years when many important things didn’t really matter as much as the opposite sex or hanging out with friends. He will make mistakes because somewhere in between the struggle for independence and nonchalance, life will teach him a lesson or two.

7. He gives you tougher battles

It was easier to instruct and guide him before now. You can see that he is maturing and standing tall and you cannot make him appear to be the smaller person in the room. Fights or arguments with him have become more ferocious and difficult. You really have to pick your battles with him carefully now.

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8. He doesn’t want you teach him how to drive

Many mothers will agree on this. He is independent and the mother cannot be the one to pass him through the delicate phase of driving a car. What will his friends say? How they will mock him. It will be better for his father to take on this role.

9. He offers you mixed emotions

You want to cry when he succeeds with his high school football team or does great with his grades. You will also want to cry when he makes a mistake or stumbles. It is a roller coaster of different emotions taking over you all through this period.

10. He will have to clean up the mess himself

You could have done the cleaning up when he was younger. You could have managed his wrongs and dealt with them just fine when he was younger. But now you have to watch him take charge of those situations and stand up to fix any mess he causes.

Featured photo credit: http://www.pixabay.com via pixabay.com

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Casey Imafidon

Specialized in motivation and personal growth, providing advice to make readers fulfilled and spurred on to achieve all that they desire in life.

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Last Updated on September 15, 2020

4 Ways to Deal With Big Life Changes in a Positive Way

4 Ways to Deal With Big Life Changes in a Positive Way

Life changes are constant. Whether it’s in the workplace or our relationships, nothing in life ever remains the same for long.

Regardless of the gravity of change, it can always be a little scary. So scary, in fact, that some people are downright crippled by the idea of it, causing them to remain stagnant through anxiety.

Have you ever noticed how much of life’s transitional periods are riddled with anxious vibes? The quarter life crisis, the mid-life crisis, cold feet before getting married, retirement anxiety, and teenage angst are just a few examples of transitional periods when people tend to panic.

We can’t control every aspect of our lives, and we can’t stop change from happening. However, how we respond to change will greatly affect our overall life experience.

Here are 4 ways you can approach life changes in a positive way.

1. Don’t Fight It

I once heard one of my favorite yoga instructors say “Suffering is what occurs when we resist what is already happening.” The lesson has stuck with me ever since.

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Life changes are usually out of our control. Rather than trying to manipulate the situation and wishing things were different, try flowing with it instead.

Of course, some initial resistance is natural if we’re going into survival mode. Just make sure you are conscious of when this resistance is no longer serving you.

If you’re feeling anxious about impending life changes, it’s time to practice some techniques to address the anxiety directly. These can include meditation, exercise, talking with friends about how you’re feeling, or journaling.

If you’re worried about a big life change, such as starting a new job[1] or moving in with your partner, do your best to control your expectations. It may help you to talk with people you know about their experiences going through similar changes. This will help you form a realistic picture in your mind of what things will look like post-change.

2. Find Healthy Ways to Deal With Feelings

Whenever we’re in transitional periods, it can be easy to lose track of ourselves. Sometimes we feel like we’re being tossed about by life and like we’ve lost our footing, causing some very uncomfortable feelings to arise.

One way we can channel these feelings is by finding healthy ways to release them. For instance, whenever I find myself in a difficult transitional phase, I end up in a mixed martial arts studio.

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The physical activity helps me channel my emotions and release endorphins. It also helps me get in shape, which generally increases my mood and energy levels.

Exercise is important in cultivating positive emotions, but if you’re struggling with anxiety in particular, it’s important to cultivate a regular exercise routine as opposed to a one-off workout. One study found that “Aerobic exercise can promote increase in anxiety acutely and regular aerobic exercise promotes reduction in anxiety levels”[2].

If exercise isn’t your thing, there are other, less intense ways of cultivating positive emotions and reducing anxiety around life changes. You can try stretching, meditating, reading in nature, spending time with family and friends, or cooking a healthy meal.

Find what makes you feel good and helps you ground yourself in the present moment.

3. Reframe Your Perspective

Reframing perspectives is a very powerful tool used in life coaching. It helps clients take a situation they are struggling with, such as a major life change, and find some sort of empowerment in it.

Some examples of disempowered thinking during life changes include casting blame, focusing on negative details, or victimizing[3]. These perspectives can make awkward transitional phases much worse than they have to be.

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Meanwhile, if we utilize a more positive perspective, such as finding a lesson in the situation, realizing that there may be an opportunity for something, or that everything passes, we can come from a greater place of ease.

4. Find Time for Self-Reflection

Having time to reflect is important at any stage in your life, but it’s especially important during transitional periods. It’s quite simple really: we need our time to step back and get centered when things get a little crazy.

As a result, big life changes are perfect for doing some self-reflection. They are opportunities to check in with ourselves and practice getting grounded for a few minutes.

Take a look at this reflective cycle adapted from Glibb’s Self-reflection guide (1988):[4]

Use self-reflection when facing life changes.

    Self-reflective exercises include meditating, yoga or journaling,[5] all of which require some quiet time to get yourself together.

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    One study found that journal improves “self-efficacy, locus of control, and learning”[6]. A healthy sense of self-control can make the process of change easier to bear, so that in itself is a great reason to try self-reflection through journaling.

    To learn how to start journaling, you can check out this article.

    Final Thoughts

    Big life changes may rock us for a little while, but they don’t have to be as bad as we initially perceive them. If handled in a positive manner, transitional periods can pave the way for some serious self-growth, reflection, and awareness.

    Cultivate a sense of positivity and find ways to diminish the anxiety around life changes. Once you make it to the other side, you’ll be grateful that you made it through in the best way possible.

    More Tips on Facing Life Changes

    Featured photo credit: Alora Griffiths via unsplash.com

    Reference

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