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Why Beauty Is Not About the Makeup, But Accepting Yourself

Why Beauty Is Not About the Makeup, But Accepting Yourself

People can’t discover themselves anymore. Perhaps because we live in a world crazed by physical attraction or because the media has swallowed up our self esteem in whom and what it glorifies. Billions of dollars are spent on cosmetics and beauty products that promise you the prefect body. Narcissism seems to exist everywhere. Between those lines, we try to join the crowd or feel left out. Yet the only way we can truly be happy is when we start accepting who we are rather than defining or carving a different image for ourselves. Although makeup beautifies our outer persona, does it build our character and define who we are? Here is where true beauty lies, in accepting ourselves for how lovely we are.

1. There is nothing wrong with us.

“What other people think of me is none of my business.”

—Wayne Dyer

Truthfully we shouldn’t live our lives according to the wrong perception of others. There is nothing wrong with us. Even if we are suffering an ailment or have a physical deformity, our body is not who we are but only a physical representation of elements of our soul. Trying to look through lenses of purity at what value exists within us makes us love ourselves more and ignore others’ opinions. Who you are moreover is who are meant to be rather than what others see you to be, and the more you understand this, the more you realize that nothing is wrong with you.

2. Accepting yourself means others will learn to accept you

“Wanting to be someone else is a waste of the person you are.”

—Kurt Cobain

By accepting yourself, you overcome issues regarding self esteem and become unstoppable in making others love you for who you are. By being positive about who you are, you suddenly become a magnetic force and define how others treat you for who you genuinely are.

3. You face the world boldly.

“Love yourself first and everything else falls into line. You really have to love yourself to get anything done in this world.”

—Lucille Ball

Somehow nature favors the bold, rather than those who hide their inferiority with grooming or make-up. By facing your weakness with your strength, you find the inner energy to build on who you are and attain your goals. The world accepts your courage and gives you the opportunity you need to grow.

4. You learn who your real friends are.

No one wants to look good for a few friends who are more concerned about your outer appearance rather than who you really are from within. By accepting yourself you learn to filter those who are meant to be with you for the whole nine yards rather than some friends who are more akin with your physical looks.

5. You become more beautiful on the inside.

By accepting yourself for who you are, you can act on who you are on the inside. With all respect to the well groomed people and made-up faces out there, accepting yourself will only give you more time to nourish your inner beauty and become a better person. You can thus focus on priorities and actions that are devoid of feelings like hatred and jealousy and being true and good to yourself.

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6. You can face life’s changes.

Whether we want it or not, we won’t remain young and static. We would grow older and have older faces. By accepting yourself you are able to prepare your mindset for whatever changes on your outer world that will come rather than be stunned or petrified by them.

7. You are happier.

Inner beauty defines true happiness. What else do you need to offer you a smile daily except a positive spirit, a good heart and an acceptance of who you are? Self contentment has never betrayed its owners, from Mother Theresa to Mahatma Gandhi. And it won’t betray you also.

Featured photo credit: young beautiful girl portrait via shutterstock.com

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Casey Imafidon

Specialized in motivation and personal growth, providing advice to make readers fulfilled and spurred on to achieve all that they desire in life.

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Last Updated on August 4, 2020

The Gentle Art of Saying No For a Less Stressful Life

The Gentle Art of Saying No For a Less Stressful Life

No!

It’s a simple fact that you can never be productive if you take on too many commitments — you simply spread yourself too thin and will not be able to get anything done, at least not well or on time.

But requests for your time are coming in all the time — through phone, email, IM or in person. To stay productive, and minimize stress, you have to learn the Gentle Art of Saying No — an art that many people have problems with.

What’s so hard about saying no? Well, to start with, it can hurt, anger or disappoint the person you’re saying “no” to, and that’s not usually a fun task. Second, if you hope to work with that person in the future, you’ll want to continue to have a good relationship with that person, and saying “no” in the wrong way can jeopardize that.

But it doesn’t have to be difficult or hard on your relationship. Here’s how to master the Gentle Art of Saying No:

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1. Value Your Time

Know your commitments, and how valuable your precious time is. Then, when someone asks you to dedicate some of your time to a new commitment, you’ll know that you simply cannot do it. And tell them that: “I just can’t right now … my plate is overloaded as it is.”

2. Know Your Priorities

Even if you do have some extra time (which for many of us is rare), is this new commitment really the way you want to spend that time?

For myself, I know that more commitments means less time with my wife and kids, who are more important to me than anything.

3. Practice Saying No

Practice makes perfect. Saying “no” as often as you can is a great way to get better at it and more comfortable with saying the word. And sometimes, repeating the word is the only way to get a message through to extremely persistent people. When they keep insisting, just keep saying no. Eventually, they’ll get the message.

4. Don’t Apologize

A common way to start out is “I’m sorry but …” as people think that it sounds more polite. While politeness is important, apologizing just makes it sound weaker. You need to be firm, and unapologetic about guarding your time.

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5. Stop Being Nice

Again, it’s important to be polite, but being nice by saying yes all the time only hurts you. When you make it easy for people to grab your time (or money), they will continue to do it. But if you erect a wall, they will look for easier targets.

Show them that your time is well guarded by being firm and turning down as many requests (that are not on your top priority list) as possible.

6. Say No to Your Boss

Sometimes we feel that we have to say yes to our boss — they’re our boss, right? And if we say “no,” then we look like we can’t handle the work — at least, that’s the common reasoning.

But in fact, it’s the opposite — explain to your boss that by taking on too many commitments, you are weakening your productivity and jeopardizing your existing commitments. If your boss insists that you take on the project, go over your project or task list and ask him/her to re-prioritize, explaining that there’s only so much you can take on at one time.

7. Pre-Empting

It’s often much easier to pre-empt requests than to say “no” to them after the request has been made. If you know that requests are likely to be made, perhaps in a meeting, just say to everyone as soon as you come into the meeting,

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“Look guys, just to let you know, my week is booked full with some urgent projects and I won’t be able to take on any new requests.”

8. Get Back to You

Instead of providing an answer then and there, it’s often better to tell the person you’ll give their request some thought and get back to them. This will allow you to give it some consideration, and check your commitments and priorities. Then, if you can’t take on the request, simply tell them:

“After giving this some thought, and checking my commitments, I won’t be able to accommodate the request at this time.”

At least you gave it some consideration.

9. Maybe Later

If this is an option that you’d like to keep open, instead of just shutting the door on the person, it’s often better to just say,

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“This sounds like an interesting opportunity, but I just don’t have the time at the moment. Perhaps you could check back with me in [give a time frame].”

Next time, when they check back with you, you might have some free time on your hands.

10. It’s Not You, It’s Me

This classic dating rejection can work in other situations. Don’t be insincere about it, though. Often, the person or project is a good one, but it’s just not right for you, at least not at this time.

Simply say so — you can compliment the idea, the project, the person, the organization … but say that it’s not the right fit, or it’s not what you’re looking for at this time. Only say this if it’s true — people can sense insincerity.

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Featured photo credit: Kyle Glenn via unsplash.com

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