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Sugar coating isn’t always the best diet

Sugar coating isn’t always the best diet

When we fail to provide all of the details involved in a task in which we are seeking assistance, we often set misguided expectations without even realizing it. We are potentially setting ourselves up for failure. An individual isn’t going to perform how you expect if he or she isn’t receiving all the information required to be successful. We tend to “sugar coat” task instructions because of the higher likelihood of it being accepted by a peer. This is not always the best way, and I’ll explain why.

When we are assigned a task or seeking a favor, we are not always honest about what is involved. “Sugar coating” is when you make the amount of work involved seems very minimal, almost effortless. It is a terrible practice and will almost always result negatively. We need to always be upfront and honest when seeking assistance.

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“It’s all in your approach”

The way you position the project to the receiver is key. The way you approach someone with a task often decides right away the outcome. We may even find ourselves procrastinating when we know the individual isn’t going to be too fond of what’s involved. If we are sugar coating the work and time involved, we aren’t allowing for proper preparation. Sugar coating will likely lead to possible failure, and frustration with the results. Always ask the right person and be sure to explain the importance of the task. It is also a great idea to periodically check to see if the project is going in the right direction. This ensures the project is progressing how you envisioned.

Like anything else, when we approach with a positive attitude we are more likely to achieve what we seek. If you find yourself procrastinating, think about the positive outcome that will come with completion. Ask for assistance from someone that you work well with and can guarantee great results.

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But how?

An example that instantly jumps into mind is when I need assistance with Excel spreadsheets. More often then not, I find myself seeking help from a co-worker. I approach Eric in an upfront manner, usually with a smile. I am sure to tell him exactly what I am looking to have done, and what he should expect. This way Eric will know right away whether or not it is something that he is capable of. Working together to plan and visualize the intended outcome can help clear any cloudiness and misconception. I always make sure that I keep steady contact throughout the days leading up to the project deadline. This helps assure me that the task is progressing and that I can expect positive results from it.

I ignore the fact that I am unable to personally complete the task. I seek assistance from someone I know is capable, but also has the time. I am sure to ask someone who is going to give me great work but will also take instruction well. My approach is always positive, and I am sure to share all details.

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Conclusion

When you are approaching someone with a task, always be clear. Be sure to provide details regarding the work involved and the time needed. We tend to find ourselves lacking in detail in order to make the project seem less tedious. Sugar coating often leads to negative results, which can result in disciplinary action in some cases. Always be upfront and thorough about what you need. Do not lack in detail, and be sure to keep yourself updated throughout the process. Promising results will only come if we make sure they are on their way, and track the progression..

Featured photo credit: picjumbo via picjumbo.com

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Last Updated on January 18, 2019

7 Ways To Deal With Negative People

7 Ways To Deal With Negative People

Some people will have a rain cloud hanging over them, no matter what the weather is outside. Their negative attitude is toxic to your own moods, and you probably feel like there is little you can do about it.

But that couldn’t be farther from the truth.

If you want to effectively deal with negative people and be a champion of positivity, then your best route is to take definite action through some of the steps below.

1. Limit the time you spend with them.

First, let’s get this out of the way. You can be more positive than a cartoon sponge, but even your enthusiasm has a chance of being afflicted by the constant negativity of a friend.

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In fact, negativity has been proven to damage your health physically, making you vulnerable to high levels of stress and even cardiac disease. There’s no reason to get hurt because of someone else’s bad mood.

Though this may be a little tricky depending on your situation, working to spend slightly less time around negative people will keep your own spirits from slipping as well.

2. Speak up for yourself.

Don’t just absorb the comments that you are being bombarded with, especially if they are about you. It’s wise to be quick to listen and slow to speak, but being too quiet can give the person the impression that you are accepting what’s being said.

3. Don’t pretend that their behavior is “OK.”

This is an easy trap to fall into. Point out to the person that their constant negativity isn’t a good thing. We don’t want to do this because it’s far easier to let someone sit in their woes, and we’d rather just stay out of it.

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But if you want the best for this person, avoid giving the false impression that their negativity is normal.

4. Don’t make their problems your problems.

Though I consider empathy a gift, it can be a dangerous thing. When we hear the complaints of a friend or family member, we typically start to take on their burdens with them.

This is a bad habit to get into, especially if this is a person who is almost exclusively negative. These types of people are prone to embellishing and altering a story in order to gain sympathy.

Why else would they be sharing this with you?

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5. Change the subject.

When you suspect that a conversation is starting to take a turn for the negative, be a champion of positivity by changing the subject. Of course, you have to do this without ignoring what the other person said.

Acknowledge their comment, but move the conversation forward before the euphoric pleasure gained from complaining takes hold of either of you.

6. Talk about solutions, not problems.

Sometimes, changing the subject isn’t an option if you want to deal with negative people, but that doesn’t mean you can’t still be positive.

I know that when someone begins dumping complaints on me, I have a hard time knowing exactly what to say. The key is to measure your responses as solution-based.

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You can do this by asking questions like, “Well, how could this be resolved?” or, “How do you think they feel about it?”

Use discernment to find an appropriate response that will help your friend manage their perspectives.

7. Leave them behind.

Sadly, there are times when we have to move on without these friends, especially if you have exhausted your best efforts toward building a positive relationship.

If this person is a family member, you can still have a functioning relationship with them, of course, but you may still have to limit the influence they have over your wellbeing.

That being said, what are some steps you’ve taken to deal with negative people? Let us know in the comments.

You may also want to read: How to Stop the Negative Spin of Thoughts, Emotions and Actions.

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