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Mom Sheds Light On What People Have Said About Her Adopted Children Through Photos

Mom Sheds Light On What People Have Said About Her Adopted Children Through Photos

A daughter by definition is “a female child or person, in relation to her mother, father or both”. Relation is “the way in which two or more people are connected”. Some people however, do not know or understand that you do not need to be related to be connected as family. Kim Kelley-Wagner is a mother of two who has recently posted a series of photos in an album titled “Things said to or about my adopted daughters” on her Facebook. Though it may not seem like it, children are always listening. What we say out of ignorance can really hurt them and linger in their thoughts.

 “Biology is the least of what makes someone a mother.” – Oprah Winfrey

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         “I am not broken because I am adopted, I am blessed.” – adoption.com

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               “There are no unwanted children, just unfound families.” – The National Adoption Center

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                    “I have four children, two are adopted, I forget which two.” – Bob Constantine

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                          “It’s important to realize that we adopt not because we are rescuers. No. We adopt because we are rescued.” – David Platt

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                                “Adoption is not a birth-mother’s rejection but an unconditional love that inspires her to put herself last and do all she can for her baby.” – Unknown

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                                    “Somehow destiny comes into play. These children end up with you and you end up with them. It’s something quite magical.” – Nicole Kidman

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                                          On her Facebook, Kim says “I have tried to explain to my daughters that people do not say these things to be mean, they say them out of ignorance, which is why I am sharing some of them. Words are powerful, they can become tools or weapons, choose to use them wisely.” All children are unique in their own way but they all need love and encouragement. They see your actions, hear your words and sometimes, if the words are said enough, think your thoughts so be mindful of what you say. Adopted children are not an exception to that rule either, they are no different from any other family with a biological child. It does not mean they love their parents any less, or that they are loved any less. It just means there were a few more pieces of paper involved in order to complete a family.

                                          “Be careful what you say, you can say something hurtful in ten seconds, but ten years later, the wounds are still there” – Joel Osteen

                                          Featured photo credit: Family – Jill Wellington via pixabay.com

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                                          Margielyn Musser

                                          Event And Volunteer Coordinator / World Traveler

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                                          Last Updated on March 5, 2021

                                          Science Says People Who Talk To Themselves Are Geniuses

                                          Science Says People Who Talk To Themselves Are Geniuses

                                          I talk a lot to myself. It helps me to keep my concentration on the activity on hand, makes me focus more on my studies, and gives me some pretty brilliant ideas while chattering to myself; more importantly, I produce better works. For example, right now, as I am typing, I am constantly mumbling to myself. Do you talk to yourself? Don’t get embarrassed admitting it because science has discovered that those who talk to themselves are actually geniuses… and not crazy!

                                          Research Background

                                          Psychologist-researcher Gary Lupyan conducted an experiment where 20 volunteers were shown objects, in a supermarket, and were asked to remember them. Half of them were told to repeat the objects, for example, banana, and the other half remained silent. In the end, the result shown that self-directed speech aided people to find the objects faster, by 50 to 100 milliseconds, compared to the silent ones.

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                                          “I’ll often mutter to myself when searching for something in the refrigerator or the supermarket shelves,” said Gary Lupyan.

                                          This personal experience actually made him conduct this experiment. Lupyan, together with another psychologist, Daniel Swigley, came up with the outcomes that those to talk to oneself are geniuses. Here are the reasons:

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                                          It stimulates your memory

                                          When you are talking to yourself, your sensory mechanism gets activated. It gets easier on your memory since you can visualize the word, and you can act accordingly.[1]

                                          It helps stay focused

                                          When you are saying it loud, you stay focused on your task,[2] and it helps you recognise that stuff immediately. Of course, this only helps if you know what the object you are searching looks like. For example, a banana is yellow in colour, and you know how a banana looks like. So when you are saying it loud, your brain immediately pictures the image on your mind. But if you don’t know what banana looks like, then there is no effect of saying it loud.

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                                          It helps you clarify your thoughts

                                          Every one of us tends to have various types of thoughts. Most make sense, while the others don’t. Suppose you are furious at someone and you feel like killing that person. Now for this issue you won’t run to a therapist, will you? No, what you do is lock yourself in a room and mutter to yourself. You are letting go off the anger by talking to yourself, the pros and cons of killing that person, and eventually you calm down. This is a silly thought that you have and are unable to share it with any other person. Psychologist Linda Sapadin said,[3]

                                          “It helps you clarify your thoughts, tend to what’s important and firm up any decisions you are contemplating.”

                                          Featured photo credit: Girl Using Laptop In Hotel Room/Ed Gregory via stokpic.com

                                          Reference

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