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A List of 100 Questions to Ask Your Partner on Date Nights

A List of 100 Questions to Ask Your Partner on Date Nights

Date nights for established couples can feel boring and stale if you talk about the same old topics all the time. Talking about work, the kids, or household repairs should not be the primary focus of nights when you’re trying to reconnect as a couple.

So, here is a list of 100 — yes, 100 — questions that you can choose from to ask each other on your next dinner out.

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Use only two to three questions per date night, and really talk about the answers in depth. They range across various domains, including romance, intimacy, family, career, and many others.

The point is to get to know your partner on a deep level all over again. This will increase your feelings of closeness, connection, and romance, which we all know is the whole point of date night!

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100 Questions to Ask Your Partner on Date Nights

  1. What is your favorite memory of dating me?
  2. What is your favorite sexual memory of us?
  3. What food reminds you of me?
  4. When was the last time you thought about me in a positive way?
  5. What is your favorite thing that I do for you?
  6. What movie reminds you of us?
  7. Which of your parents are you most like?
  8. Which of our kids are most like you? (or if you aren’t parents yet: Do you ever picture having kids?)
  9. What’s my best physical feature?
  10. What do you like most that I do in bed?
  11. What’s your favorite time of day to be intimate?
  12. Do you like kissing or hugging more?
  13. When did you know you wanted to be monogamous with me?
  14. Do you ever get jealous if you see me talking to other attractive people?
  15. Do you ever dream about me?
  16. What do you think we need to work on the most in our relationship?
  17. If you got sick, do you think I would be there to care for you?
  18. Do you believe that I love you?
  19. When did you know you wanted to kiss me?
  20. What’s your favorite non-sex activity that we do together?
  21. As a child, did you trust both of your parents?
  22. What is your favorite thing I ever did for a special occasion for you?
  23. What is your favorite sexual fantasy?
  24. What is your favorite sexual position?
  25. Do you ever think about me sexually during the day?
  26. What is something I could do to make you trust me even more?
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    • When do you feel the most protected and taken care of?
    • What can I do to make sure you feel safe with me?
    • When we hang out with friends, do I make you feel like you’re still my priority?
    • When we are with my family, do I make you feel like you’re still my priority?
    • Do you have any deal-breakers, things that would make you seriously reconsider our relationship?
    • What was the very first thing you thought about me?
    • When did you first think I was attractive?
    • How long do you think people should wait before having kids?
    • What did you learn about marriage from your parents?
    • What did you learn about physical affection from your parents?
    • What is your favorite book?
    • What is your favorite song?
    • What was your first favorite movie, as a child?
    • What do you want to do when you retire?
    • Do you ever picture having grandchildren?
    • What’s another career that you think you would love?
    • What’s your favorite physical feature of your own?
    • Who was your favorite teacher when you were a child?
    • What’s your favorite memory with your mom?
    • What’s your favorite memory with your dad?
    • Which significant other before me had the biggest impact on you?
    • What did you think after your first sexual experience?
    • Did you like high school or college better?
    • Where have you always wanted to travel?
    • Did you ever consider a totally different career path?
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      • What was your favorite class in high school?
      • What was the best party you ever went to?
      • What’s the happiest you ever felt?
      • What’s the most anxious you ever felt?
      • What’s the angriest you ever felt?
      • Do you believe in God?
      • What’s a question you’ve never asked me?
      • What’s your favorite personality trait of your own?
      • Which of your personality traits do you wish you could change?
      • Have you ever gotten really obsessed with some topic?
      • Did you collect stuff as a child?
      • Which of your parents did you go to when you wanted to talk?
      • What’s the most scared you ever felt, as a child?
      • What’s the accomplishment you are most proud of?
      • Where do you want to be living in 10 years?
      • Which of your friends would you choose if you had to be on a desert island with just one?
      • Which of your friends is most like you?
      • What do you think about couples who are married but live in different cities?
      • What do you think about couples who own a business together and spend all their time together?
      • Which would you like most: a summer house, a year-long vacation, or a boat?
      • What would you do with a million dollars?
      • What would you do with an extra $1,000 to spend only on yourself?
      • When you were a kid, did you feel that you fitted in?
      • What was your favorite subject in middle school?
      • Did you go through puberty before or after everyone else, or right on time?
      • Who was your first crush?
      • Who was your first kiss?
      • Who was the first person to have a crush on you?
      • Do you think of yourself as an introvert or an extrovert?
      • If you could go back in time, what age would you be again?
      • If you could see into the future, what would you want to know?
      • What’s your greatest talent?
      • What is your most unique trait?
      • What makes me different from the other people you’ve been with?
      • What is the best thing about our relationship?
      • Do you ever compare yourself to other guys/girls?
      • Which of my friends do you think is the most fun?
      • Are you an optimist, a pessimist, or a realist?
      • When you wake up in the middle of the night, what do you think about?
      • If you had to change one thing about yourself, what would you pick?
      • Do you think I’m more of an optimist, a pessimist, or a realist?
      • As a teenager, did you ever rebel against your parents?
      • Who’s the closest person to you in your extended family?
      • Did you ever want more or fewer siblings?
      • How did you siblings shape who you are?
      • What was your favorite date night we ever had?
      • What are your secret thoughts when you see me at the end of the day?
      • Do you ever wish I could read your mind? When?
      • What things about me make you know I’m the one for you?

      Whew! That was a long list. Now go make reservations, and there is no excuse if you end up talking about the cat vomiting on the rug.

      More Dating Ideas for Couples

      50 Unique and Really Fun Date Ideas for Couples

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      The Best Date Night Movies That Guys Will Enjoy Just As Much As Girls

      18 Ways To Bring More Fun Into Your Romance

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      Featured photo credit: Unsplash via unsplash.com

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      Samantha Rodman

      Clinical psychologist, author, blogger, wife and mommy.

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      Last Updated on July 3, 2020

      30 Small Habits To Lead A More Peaceful Life

      30 Small Habits To Lead A More Peaceful Life

      In today’s world, true peace must come from within us and our own actions. Here are 30 small things you can do on a regular basis to increase your overall sense of harmony, peace, and well-being:

      1. Don’t go to every fight you’re invited to

      Particularly when you’re around those who thrive on chaos, be willing to decline the invitation to join in on the drama.

      2. Focus on your breath

      Throughout the day, stop to take a few deep breaths. Keep stress at bay with techniques such as “square breathing.” Breathe in for four counts, hold for four counts, then out for four counts, and hold again for four counts. Repeat this cycle four times.

      3. Get organized and purge old items

      A cluttered space often creates a cluttered spirit. Take the time to get rid of anything you haven’t used in a year and invest in organizational systems that help you sustain a level of neatness.

      4. Stop yourself from being judgmental

      Whenever you are tempted to have an opinion about someone else’s life, check your intentions. Judging others creates and promotes negative energy.

      5. Say ‘thank you’ early and often

      Start and end each day with an attitude of gratitude. Look for opportunities in your daily routine and interactions to express appreciation.

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      6. Smile more

      Even if you have to “fake it until you make it,” there are many scientific benefits of smiling and laughing. Also, pay attention to your facial expression when you are doing neutral activities such as driving and walking. Turn that frown upside down!

      7. Don’t worry about the future

      As difficult as this sounds, there is a direct connection between staying in the present and living a more peaceful life. You cannot control the future. As the old proverb goes, “Worry is like a rocking chair. It gives you something to do, but it won’t get you anywhere.” Practice gently bringing your thoughts back to the present.

      8. Eat real food

      The closer the food is to the state from which it came from the earth, the better you will feel in eating it. Choose foods that grew from a plant over food that was made in a plant.

      9. Choose being happy over being right

      Too often, we sacrifice inner peace in order to make a point. It’s rarely worth it.

      10. Keep technology out of the bedroom

      Many studies, such as one conducted by Brigham and Women’s Hospital, have connected blue light of electronic devices before bed to adverse sleep and overall health. To make matters worse, many people report that they cannot resist checking email and social media when their cell phone is in reach of their bed, regardless of the time.

      11. Make use of filtering features on social media

      You may not want to “unfriend” someone completely, however you can choose whether you want to follow their posts and/or the sources of information that they share.

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      12. Get comfortable with silence

      When you picture someone who is the ultimate state of peace, typically they aren’t talking.

      13. Listen to understand, not to respond

      So often in conversations, we use our ears to give us cues about when it is our turn to say what we want to say. Practice active listening, ask questions, process, then speak.

      14. Put your troubles in a bubble

      Whenever you start to feel anxious, visualize the situation being wrapped in a bubble and then picture that sphere floating away.

      15. Speak more slowly

      Often a lack of peace manifests itself in fast or clipped speech. Take a breath, slow down, and let your thoughtful consideration drive your words.

      16. Don’t procrastinate

      Nothing adds stress to our lives like waiting until the last minute.

      17. Buy a coloring book

      Mandala coloring books for adults are becoming more popular because of their connection to creating inner peace.

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      18. Prioritize yourself

      You are the only person who you are guaranteed to live with 24 hours a day for the rest of your life.

      19. Forgive others

      Holding a grudge is hurting you exponentially more than anyone else. Let it go.

      20. Check your expectations

      Presumption often leads to drama. Remember the old saying, “Expectations are premeditated resentments.”

      21. Engage in active play

      Let your inner child come out and have some fun. Jump, dance, play, and pretend!

      22. Stop criticizing yourself

      The world is a hard enough place with more than enough critics. Your life is not served well by being one of them.

      23. Focus your energy and attention on what you want

      Thoughts, words, and actions all create energy. Energy attracts like energy. Put out what you want to get back.

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      24. Assign yourself “complaint free” days.

      Make a conscious decision not to complain about anything for a whole day. It might be harder than you think and the awareness will stick with you.

      25. Surround yourself with people you truly enjoy being in the company of

      Personalities tend to be contagious, and not everyone’s is worth catching. Be judicious in your choices.

      26. Manage your money

      Financial concerns rank top on the list of what causes people stress. Take the time each month to do a budget, calculate what you actually spend and sanity check that against the money you have coming in.

      27. Stop trying to control everything

      Not only is your inner control freak sabotaging your sense of peace, it is also likely getting in the way of external relationships as well.

      28. Practice affirmations

      Repeat positive phrases that depict the life and qualities you want to attract. It may not come naturally to you, but it works.

      29. Get up before sunrise

      Personally witnessing the dawn brings a unique sense of awe and appreciation for life.

      30. Be yourself

      Nothing creates more inner discord than trying to be something other than who we really are. Authenticity breeds happiness.

      Featured photo credit: man watching sunrise via stokpic.com

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