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A List of 100 Questions to Ask Your Partner on Date Nights

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A List of 100 Questions to Ask Your Partner on Date Nights

Date nights for established couples can feel boring and stale if you talk about the same old topics all the time. Talking about work, the kids, or household repairs should not be the primary focus of nights when you’re trying to reconnect as a couple.

So, here is a list of 100 — yes, 100 — questions that you can choose from to ask each other on your next dinner out.

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Use only two to three questions per date night, and really talk about the answers in depth. They range across various domains, including romance, intimacy, family, career, and many others.

The point is to get to know your partner on a deep level all over again. This will increase your feelings of closeness, connection, and romance, which we all know is the whole point of date night!

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100 Questions to Ask Your Partner on Date Nights

  1. What is your favorite memory of dating me?
  2. What is your favorite sexual memory of us?
  3. What food reminds you of me?
  4. When was the last time you thought about me in a positive way?
  5. What is your favorite thing that I do for you?
  6. What movie reminds you of us?
  7. Which of your parents are you most like?
  8. Which of our kids are most like you? (or if you aren’t parents yet: Do you ever picture having kids?)
  9. What’s my best physical feature?
  10. What do you like most that I do in bed?
  11. What’s your favorite time of day to be intimate?
  12. Do you like kissing or hugging more?
  13. When did you know you wanted to be monogamous with me?
  14. Do you ever get jealous if you see me talking to other attractive people?
  15. Do you ever dream about me?
  16. What do you think we need to work on the most in our relationship?
  17. If you got sick, do you think I would be there to care for you?
  18. Do you believe that I love you?
  19. When did you know you wanted to kiss me?
  20. What’s your favorite non-sex activity that we do together?
  21. As a child, did you trust both of your parents?
  22. What is your favorite thing I ever did for a special occasion for you?
  23. What is your favorite sexual fantasy?
  24. What is your favorite sexual position?
  25. Do you ever think about me sexually during the day?
  26. What is something I could do to make you trust me even more?
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    • When do you feel the most protected and taken care of?
    • What can I do to make sure you feel safe with me?
    • When we hang out with friends, do I make you feel like you’re still my priority?
    • When we are with my family, do I make you feel like you’re still my priority?
    • Do you have any deal-breakers, things that would make you seriously reconsider our relationship?
    • What was the very first thing you thought about me?
    • When did you first think I was attractive?
    • How long do you think people should wait before having kids?
    • What did you learn about marriage from your parents?
    • What did you learn about physical affection from your parents?
    • What is your favorite book?
    • What is your favorite song?
    • What was your first favorite movie, as a child?
    • What do you want to do when you retire?
    • Do you ever picture having grandchildren?
    • What’s another career that you think you would love?
    • What’s your favorite physical feature of your own?
    • Who was your favorite teacher when you were a child?
    • What’s your favorite memory with your mom?
    • What’s your favorite memory with your dad?
    • Which significant other before me had the biggest impact on you?
    • What did you think after your first sexual experience?
    • Did you like high school or college better?
    • Where have you always wanted to travel?
    • Did you ever consider a totally different career path?
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      • What was your favorite class in high school?
      • What was the best party you ever went to?
      • What’s the happiest you ever felt?
      • What’s the most anxious you ever felt?
      • What’s the angriest you ever felt?
      • Do you believe in God?
      • What’s a question you’ve never asked me?
      • What’s your favorite personality trait of your own?
      • Which of your personality traits do you wish you could change?
      • Have you ever gotten really obsessed with some topic?
      • Did you collect stuff as a child?
      • Which of your parents did you go to when you wanted to talk?
      • What’s the most scared you ever felt, as a child?
      • What’s the accomplishment you are most proud of?
      • Where do you want to be living in 10 years?
      • Which of your friends would you choose if you had to be on a desert island with just one?
      • Which of your friends is most like you?
      • What do you think about couples who are married but live in different cities?
      • What do you think about couples who own a business together and spend all their time together?
      • Which would you like most: a summer house, a year-long vacation, or a boat?
      • What would you do with a million dollars?
      • What would you do with an extra $1,000 to spend only on yourself?
      • When you were a kid, did you feel that you fitted in?
      • What was your favorite subject in middle school?
      • Did you go through puberty before or after everyone else, or right on time?
      • Who was your first crush?
      • Who was your first kiss?
      • Who was the first person to have a crush on you?
      • Do you think of yourself as an introvert or an extrovert?
      • If you could go back in time, what age would you be again?
      • If you could see into the future, what would you want to know?
      • What’s your greatest talent?
      • What is your most unique trait?
      • What makes me different from the other people you’ve been with?
      • What is the best thing about our relationship?
      • Do you ever compare yourself to other guys/girls?
      • Which of my friends do you think is the most fun?
      • Are you an optimist, a pessimist, or a realist?
      • When you wake up in the middle of the night, what do you think about?
      • If you had to change one thing about yourself, what would you pick?
      • Do you think I’m more of an optimist, a pessimist, or a realist?
      • As a teenager, did you ever rebel against your parents?
      • Who’s the closest person to you in your extended family?
      • Did you ever want more or fewer siblings?
      • How did you siblings shape who you are?
      • What was your favorite date night we ever had?
      • What are your secret thoughts when you see me at the end of the day?
      • Do you ever wish I could read your mind? When?
      • What things about me make you know I’m the one for you?

      Whew! That was a long list. Now go make reservations, and there is no excuse if you end up talking about the cat vomiting on the rug.

      More Dating Ideas for Couples

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      Featured photo credit: Unsplash via unsplash.com

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      Samantha Rodman

      Clinical psychologist, author, blogger, wife and mommy.

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      Last Updated on January 5, 2022

      How to Deal With Anger (The Ultimate Anger Management Guide)

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      How to Deal With Anger (The Ultimate Anger Management Guide)

      We all lose our temper from time to time, and expressing anger is actually a healthy thing to do in our relationships with others. Expressing our differences in opinion allows us to have healthy conflict and many times come to an agreement or understanding that works for everyone. However, there are times when anger can become overwhelming or damaging, and during these times, it’s important to learn how to deal with anger.

      Expressing anger inappropriately can be harmful to relationships, both personal and professional. You may express too much anger, too often, or at times that are only going to make things worse, not better. In this article we will look at anger management techniques that will help you better control your emotions.

      Let’s take a deeper look at how to deal with anger.

      Expressing Anger

      Anger is a natural and normal part of almost any relationship. This includes relationships with your significant other, kids, boss, friends, family, etc. Anger provides us with valuable information if we are willing to listen to it. It clues us in to areas where we disagree with others and things that need to be changed or altered.

      Unhealthy Ways to Express Anger

      Here are some common yet unhealthy ways to express anger that you should avoid:

      Being Passive-Aggressive

      This is a term many of us are familiar with. Passive-aggressive behavior happens when someone is angry but uses indirect communication to express their anger.

      Some of the more common passive-aggressive behaviors include the silent treatment, making comments about someone behind their back, being grumpy, moody, or pouting, or simply not doing tasks or assignments that they should.

      This is a passive-aggressive person’s way of showing their anger. It’s not very productive but extremely common.

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      Poorly-Timed

      Some people get overwhelmed and express anger in a situation where it can’t really do any good.

      An example would be getting angry at one person in front of a crowd of people. All that does is make people uncomfortable and shuts them down. It’s not a healthy way to express anger or disagreement with someone.

      Ongoing Anger

      Being angry all the time is most often a symptom of something else. It’s healthy and normal to express anger when you disagree with someone. However, if someone is angry most of the time and always seems to be expressing their anger to everyone around them, this won’t serve them well.

      Over time, people will start to avoid this person and have as little contact as possible. The reason being is no one likes being around someone who is angry all the time; it’s a no-win situation.

      Healthy Ways to Express Anger

      What about the healthy ways[1] to adapt? When learning how to deal with anger, here are some healthy ways to get you started.

      Being Honest

      Express your anger or disagreement honestly. Be truthful about what it is that is making you angry. Sometimes this will entail walking away and thinking about it for a bit before you respond.

      Don’t say you’re mad at something someone did or said when it’s really something else that upset you.

      Being Direct

      Similar to being honest, being direct is a healthy way to express anger.

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      Don’t talk around something that is making you angry. Don’t say that one thing is making you angry when it’s really something else, and don’t stack items on top of each other so you can unload on someone about 10 different things 6 months from now.

      Be direct and upfront about what is making you angry. Ensure you are expressing your anger to the person who upset you or you are angry at, not to someone else. This is very counterproductive.

      Being Timely

      When something makes you angry, it’s much better to express it in a timely manner. Don’t keep it bottled up inside of you, as that’s only going to do more harm than good.

      Think of the marriages that seem to go up in flames out of nowhere when the reality is someone kept quiet for years until they hit their breaking point.

      Expressing anger as it occurs is a much healthier way of using anger to help us guide our relationships in the moment.

      How to Deal With Anger

      If you feel angry, how should you deal with it right at that moment?

      1. Slow Down

      From time to time, I receive an email at work that makes me so angry that steam is probably pouring out of my ears.

      In my less restrained moments, I have been known to fire off a quick response, and that typically has ended about as well as you might imagine.

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      When I actually walk away from my computer and go do something else for a while, I am able to calm down and think more rationally. After that happens, I am able to respond in a more appropriate and productive manner. Doing things that helps you learn how to release anger can make an uncomfortable situation more manageable before it gets out of hand.

      2. Focus on the “I”

      Remember that you are the one that’s upset. Don’t accuse people of making you upset because, in the end, it’s your response to what someone did that really triggered your anger. You don’t want to place blame by saying something like “Why don’t you ever put away your dishes?” Say something more like “Having dirty dishes laying on the counter upsets me—can you work with me to come to a solution?”

      When you are accusatory towards someone, all that does is increase the tension. This doesn’t usually do anything except make your anger rise higher.

      3. Work out

      When learning how to deal with anger, exercise is a great outlet. If something happens that angers you, see if you have the opportunity to burn off some of the anger.

      Being able to hit the gym to get a hard workout in is great. If this isn’t an option, see if you can go for a run or a bike ride. If you are at work when you become angry and the weather permits, at least go outside for a brisk walk.

      Besides working some of your anger out through exercise, this also helps to give your mind a chance to work through some ways to address what it is that upset you.

      4. Seek Help When Needed

      There are times when we could all use some help. Life can be stressful and overwhelming. It’s perfectly fine to seek some help from a mental health professional if it will help you get back to a healthy balance.If you find that you are angry all the time, it might be a good idea to go talk to an expert about learning to control intense emotions. They can give you some sound advice and ideas on how to get your anger to a more manageable and healthy level.

      5. Practice Relaxation

      We all seem to lead incredibly busy lives, and that’s a good thing if we are loving the life we are living. That being said, it is very beneficial to our physical and mental well-being to take time out for relaxation.

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      That can mean spending time doing things that help us calm down and relax, like being around people we enjoy, practicing deep breathing or listening to music. It could be making time for things that help bring us balance like a healthy diet and physical activity.

      Many people incorporate techniques such as yoga and meditation to calm their minds and release tension when learning how to deal with anger. Whatever your choice is, ensure you take time out to relax when warning signs of anger start to bubble up.

      6. Laugh

      Incorporating humor and laughter on a regular basis will help keep anger in check and help you get over a bad mood and feelings of anger more quickly. This isn’t part of formal anger management techniques, but you’ll be surprised by how well it works. Remember, life is a journey that’s meant to be enjoyed fully along the way through healthy emotion. Make sure you take time to laugh and have fun.Surround yourself with people that like to laugh and enjoy life. Don’t work at a job that just causes you stress, which can lead to anger. Work at something you enjoy doing.

      7. Be Grateful

      It’s easy to focus on the bad in life and the things that cause us negative emotions. It’s vitally important to remind ourselves of all the wonderful things in life that bring us positive emotions, things that we easily forget because we get caught up in the whirlwind of day to day life.

      Take time out each day to remind yourself of a few things you are grateful for in order to help you learn how to release anger and invite in more positive feelings.

      Final Thoughts

      Life can be overwhelming at times. We seem to have constant pressure to achieve more and to always be on the go or motivated. People we are around and situations we are in can cause stress, anger, and negative emotions. At times, it can seem to be too much, and we get angry and our emotions start to get out of control.

      During these times, keep in mind that life is an incredible journey, full of wonder and things that bring you joy. When you find yourself angry more often than is healthy, take time out to remember the good things in life—the things that we seem to forget yet bring us so much positive energy and emotions.

      Use some of the tips included here to help with how to deal with anger and better control your emotions.

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      More Resources on Anger Management

      Featured photo credit: Andre Hunter via unsplash.com

      Reference

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