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It Just Takes One Person to Change Your Life: This Random Woman Shows Obese Guy What He’s worth

It Just Takes One Person to Change Your Life: This Random Woman Shows Obese Guy What He’s worth

Isn’t it amazing how one person can change your life? Not because there was something wrong or because you needed to; you’ve just subconsciously make a decision to better yourself because of them.

These are the people whom you look forward to speaking to everyday. They can make your day with a simple “Hello.” They brighten up your day just by being at your side. They have the power to alter the way you think because you’re able to see things from their perspective as well as your own. Just by spending time with someone, you tend to pick up their tendencies, their mannerisms and their values without realizing it. It’s so nice to have that one person who takes the time to care about you, to ask about your day, and to worry about you.

You could meet this person anywhere at any time. You just have to be patient and open to those around you. You could meet them at your local gym, at the supermarket, while walking your dog, or you might even roll down your window to talk to them while stuck in a traffic jam. You could meet them absolutely anywhere—just don’t give up hope!

However, what if you never met the person physically? Can a person online via a chat room, social media site, email, or even a game have the same type of impact on someone? There are a number of communities online that offer help and support to individuals for endless amounts of problems and situations, from drug abuse to being new parents.

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But what about something as simple as a game application on your phone? One that chooses your opponent for you from all the thousands or millions of users. What are the odds that a game would match you with the person who has the ability to change you and your life for the better? Pretty slim right? Probably so small, it’s not worth considering?

Well let me introduce Brian Flemming and Jackie Eastham, who met on a popular iPhone app.

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    Draw Something is a very popular and simplistic game, similar to Pictionary. You simply get an item to draw for your opponent to guess as quickly as possible. At the end of the game you have the option to write comments to one another. You can also communicate via writing words instead of images. This ability to communicate saved Brian’s life.

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    Brian Flemming was morbidly obese, depressed and was an alcoholic. Brian would eat fast food every day and drink a fifth of vodka mixed with a litre of soda every night. He had dropped out of college, and at the age of 30, he would spend endless hours playing games and distract himself from his depression by overeating and drinking away his problems. This type of lifestyle would have most definitely lead to Brian’s death, had it not been for Jackie Eastham. He never would have imagined that she could save him from his 625lbs depressing life.

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      Jackie Eastham is 20 years older than Brian and suffers from a condition called Myotonic Muscular Dystrophy. This is a form of muscular dystrophy which generally weakens muscles and causes muscle wasting in the hands, feet, face and neck, but can spread to other parts of the body. Jackie lives a very conscious, healthy lifestyle because of her condition and could easily tell that Brian was wasting his life and seriously damaging his body and his long-term health.

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        Brian confided in Jackie about his weight, his depression and his drinking problems. Jackie soon inspired him to stop drinking. He lost 100lbs from that alone in the first month. From here he decided to start eating healthy and exercising. Jackie, with her experience and wisdom, was able to coach Brian and encourage him every step of the way.

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          Almost a year after they met on Draw Something, Brian had lost 400lbs, got a new job, was in therapy, and was training for his first marathon.

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              Brian, who lives in America, traveled to Paris to finally meet Jackie, who he calls his champion. While in Paris, they climbed the Eiffel Tower together. Brian has said on his blog (which describes his whole journey), that “Jackie is the best thing that’s ever happened to me. I feel that she saved my life, even though she would never take credit.”

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                From Brian and Jackie’s inspirational story, we can learn that it’s never too late to change your own life or help someone else change theirs for the better. You’re never too far away to make a difference.

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                Last Updated on January 16, 2020

                12 Simple Ways to Boost Your Confidence Right Now

                12 Simple Ways to Boost Your Confidence Right Now

                The way you feel about yourself greatly influences how you live and interact with others. If you are confident about yourself, you tend to see yourself positively and actually enjoy spending time with and around people. You don’t feel self-conscious or awkward around others, and that allows you to live your fullest and happiest life.

                However, if you’re drowning in a sea of self-doubt, hesitancy and shyness, you often withdraw and isolate yourself from others and avoid interacting and connecting with people. That anxiety you feel in the pit of your stomach when you are around people is holding you back greatly and it is not good for your emotional health and overall well-being. You need to do something about it if you are low in self-confidence or have friends or family members who are not confident.

                “Confidence isn’t walking into a room thinking you’re better than everyone, it’s walking in not having to compare yourself to anyone” – Anonymous

                Here are simple, practical tips to boost your confidence right now and make you feel and act your best.

                1. Stop labeling yourself as awkward, timid or shy.

                When you label yourself as awkward, timid or shy, you sub-consciously tell your mind to act accordingly and psychologically feel inclined to live up to those expectations. Instead of labeling and entertaining negative self-talk, visualize and affirm yourself as confident and strong. Close your eyes for a minute and visualize yourself in different situation as you would like to be.

                Be your own cheerleader. Experts believe that positive affirmation and good mental practices like picturing yourself winning or achieving a goal can lead to greater feelings of self-assurance and prepare your brain for success.[1] As the saying goes, “seeing is believing.” Picture yourself as confident and soon enough you will begin to manifest behavior that gives evidence to this new ‘fact.’

                2. Recognize that the world is not focused on you (unless, of course, you are Kanye West).

                That means you don’t have to be excessively sensitive about who you are or what you are doing (or not doing). You are not on the center stage; there is no need for preoccupation with self and perfectionism. As rap music star Rocko sings, “You just do you and I will do me, aight?”

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                Forget about trying to please everyone or being perfect. Trying to be perfect and being a people-pleaser puts too much pressure on you and creates unnecessary anxiety. Besides, people are too preoccupied with their own issues to pay much attention to your every move unless, of course, you are a mega famous, super celebrity like Beyonce or Kanye West.

                3. Focus on other people as opposed to yourself.

                If you are low on confidence, self-conscious, nervous and shy in social situations, focus your attention on other people and what they are saying or doing instead of focusing on your own awkwardness.

                For example, think about what it is that is interesting about the person who’s the centre of the party or the guy or girl you are talking with. Prompt them to talk more about themselves and be genuinely curious and interested in what they say. You will instantly come across as confident and warmhearted.

                People generally want to talk about themselves, be heard and understood. They will love it when you’re eager and willing to listen to them and really hear what they have to say.

                This habit of focusing more on what you love in others as opposed to what you dislike in yourself will not only help you become more assertive and comfortable in virtually all social situations, but also instantly make you feel great about yourself.

                4. Know (and accept) yourself for who you are.

                Chinese military general, strategist and philosopher Sun Tzu, author of the internationally acclaimed book The Art of War, said, “Know yourself and you will win all battles.” Even in the battle with lack of confidence, you will need to know yourself to win.

                Knowing yourself starts with understanding that people are not all the same, neither are all social situation suitable for everyone. You might not be confident in large gatherings, but you could be bold and confident in one-on-one and small group interactions. We all have our own unique gifts and unique ways of expressing ourselves. Embrace yours!

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                Introverts, for example, have a quiet confidence that is, unfortunately, often confused for shyness. They are naturally low key and prefer to spend time alone. However, this natural disposition affords them certain unique gifts, such as an ability to listen better than most people and notice things that others don’t.

                Your uniqueness is where your strength and advantage lies. You won’t be comfortable and confident in all situations all the time. Albert Einstein said,

                “Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.”

                5. Crack a smile.

                If there is one sure way to instantly boost your confidence, it’s cracking a smile. Christine Clapp, a public speaking expert at The George Washington University, says that flashing those pretty, pearly white teeth will immediately make you appear both confident and composed. But, the effect of smiling is not just external. Studies show that smiling can also help nix feelings of stress and pave the way for a happier and more relaxed you.[2]

                Not a bad return for something seemingly so trite, wouldn’t you agree?

                6. Break a sweat—with exercise.

                Working out is another great way to make yourself feel amazing and confident. Science has shown that exercising increases your endorphins, helps reduce stress, tones your muscles and makes you feel happy and confident.[3]

                And hey, all you have to do is take a walk a few times a week and you’ll see the benefits. What seems to matter—as far as your confidence goes—is whether you break a sweat, not how strenuous your session is, which is pretty cool. Start working out now.

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                7. Groom yourself.

                This might seem mundane, but it’s amazing how much of a difference a shower and shave can have on your confidence and self-image. And when you spritz on a scent, the boost on confidence and self-esteem is incredible. As it turns out, your favorite fragrance does more than make you smell oh-so-nice.

                A study found that a fragrance can inspire confidence in men. Interestingly, the study also found that the more a man likes the fragrance, the more confident he might feel. Another study found that 90% of women feel more confident while wearing a scent than those who go fragrance-free.

                8. Dress nicely.

                Another one that might seem trite, but it works. If you dress nicely, you’ll instantly feel good about yourself and give your confidence a real boost. That is largely because you’ll feel attractive, presentable and sometimes even successful in nice clothes.

                While dressing nicely means something different for everyone, it does not necessarily mean wearing $500 designer outfits. It means wearing clothes that are clean, that you are comfortable in and that are nice-looking and presentable, including casual clothes.

                9. Do activities you enjoy.

                Whether it is reading a book, playing a musical instrument, riding your bicycle or going fishing, do what you really enjoy and what makes you truly happy often. It will boost your self-esteem, soothe your ego and allow you to identify with your gifts and talents. That will in turn bolster your self-belief and grow your confidence exponentially.

                You might not become popular for doing what you love, but you might not even want to be popular at all. Being popular doesn’t make you happy; doing what you love does.

                10. Prepare for the possibility of rejection / setback.

                Late World No. 1 professional tennis player Arthur Ashe said, “One important key to success is self-confidence. A key to self-confidence is preparation.” You need to prepare for the possibility of rejection and setback.

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                Why?

                Everybody suffers rejection and setback at one point or another. You are not exempted. The question on your mind, therefore, should not be if you will be rejected, but how you will handle rejection when it comes.

                Prepare yourself adequately in every situation to minimize the risk and effect of rejection and so that your confidence is not broken. For example, learn public speaking and rehearse what you are going to say beforehand if you have landed a public speaking engagement. That way, you are sure of yourself and confident you have what it takes to hack it. If you are rejected, don’t take it personally.

                Rejection and setbacks happen to the best of us. Take it as a learning experience. Learn from your mistakes and move on.

                11. Face uncomfortable situations square in the face.

                Don’t run away from uncomfortable situations. Running away from people or situations because you feel scared, shy or timid only confirms and reinforces your shyness. Instead, face the situation that makes you uneasy square in the face. For example, go ahead and talk to that person you are afraid to approach, or go straight to the front of your yoga class! What’s the worst that can happen?

                Prepare and be ready for any eventuality. The more you face your fears, the more you realize you are stronger than you thought and the more confident you get. This simple, yet admittedly courageous, act makes you unstoppable. You get comfortable being uncomfortable and begin to feel like you can take on the world. And that is the hallmark of someone destined for great things.

                12. Sit up straight and walk tall—you are awesome!

                Yes, sit up straight and believe you are awesome. Don’t slump in your chair or slouch your shoulders. Experts say the right stance can not only keep your self-esteem and mood lifted, but also lead to more confidence in your own thoughts.[4]

                The way to sit is to open up your chest and keep your head level so that you look and feel poised and assured. And when you get up, stand tall and walk like you’re on a mission. People who sit up straight and walk tall are more attractive and instantly feel more confident. Try it now: you’ll feel fierce and confident just by sitting up straight and walking tall.

                Featured photo credit: Freshh Connection via unsplash.com

                Reference

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