Advertising
Advertising

5 Reasons Vaguebooking Is Destroying Your Relationships

5 Reasons Vaguebooking Is Destroying Your Relationships

Vaguebooking has been responsible for a lot of discontent on social media. For those who may not know what vaguebooking is, it’s the act of posting a status update about a specific thing or person but providing absolutely no details as to who they are or what the thing might be. It drives people nuts and here are five reasons vaguebooking may be destroying your relationships with friends, family, and even your significant other.

1. People will probably guess your subject incorrectly

Advertising

vaguebooking

    The scenario:

    You vague-book post about someone not getting off your back about something. Insert a sad or angry face and post. You feel better having ranted.
    The danger: Nobody has any idea who you’re talking about so they start assuming. Some may assume you’re talking about work, some may assume you’re talking about a significant other, and others still may assume your parents or someone else entirely. This causes them to feel discontent toward this other person even when they did nothing wrong. This can lead to friends hating your significant other, people thinking your parents are worse people than they really are, or it could even start problems among your friends. This can lead to pressure on you to do something about a problem that doesn’t exist! Save yourself the effort and save them the frustration. Either keep it to yourself or add in the details so everyone has their anger pointed in the right direction.

    2. It will probably make your problems worse

    The scenario: It’s pretty much the same scenario. You complain about an unspecified something or someone. Add an angry face or a sad face and post.
    The danger: While a little anonymous trash talking on Facebook may make you feel good in the short term, it does little (read: nothing) to help you on the long term. Your problem still exists and since you’re doing literally nothing to fix it other than complaining about it on Facebook, your problem will continue to exist. What’s worse is when that unspecified something or someone finds out that your status is about them. Then you’ve not only not solved your problem, but now you have something or someone angry at you for talking smack on Facebook. Plus, those sorts of problems should be handled internally anyway. You don’t need to be airing your own (or anyone else’s) dirty laundry on Facebook. That shows people that you can’t be trusted and soon they’ll start walking away.

    Advertising

    3. You will come off as an attention seeker

    vaguebooking
      The problem:

      It’s the same scenario. You’re angry about something but you don’t know what to do about it so you vague-book it.
      The danger: There will be some people that look at your post and think that you just want attention. There are some people who vague-book on purpose just to get likes or to have people ask them what’s wrong. They like the attention. It’s a behavior typically seen among kids, teens, and adolescents who haven’t yet learned the importance of proper communication. When you vague-book, people will start associating you with other people who participate in that kind of behavior even if you’re not that kind of person. In other words, people will start assuming you just want attention and that your attention seeking is juvenile. They lose respect for you and suddenly your circle of friends starts getting a little thin.

      Advertising

      4. Some people just plain hate vaguebooking

      vaguebooking

        The problem:

        Okay so let’s assume that you’ve got friends who don’t think that you’re an attention seeker and that they’re smart enough to avoid the other two problems. Sometimes, people just hate vaguebooking.
        The danger: This is why Google+ is a thing now. People go on Facebook and see vague-book statuses one after another. It gets old and defeats the point of social media (which is to be social). They may unfriend you, unfollow you, and if enough of their friends do it, may even seek another social network to get away from it all. Unfortunately for them, vaguebooking is on every single social network to an extent so they’ll never truly escape it. However, that won’t stop them for hating you for polluting their News Feed with what they consider to be senseless babble.

        Advertising

        5. People may not take your real problems seriously anymore

        The problem: You have complained about vague nothings for so long that when you have a real problem, your friends have grown numb to you complaining about it and simply don’t care anymore.
        The danger: The problem and the danger is pretty much the same. If you vague-book about little nothings that don’t matter, then your friends will stop paying attention. Then when something truly serious comes along, they’ll look at your post about it as just another in a long line of complaining. By vaguebooking, you essentially destroy your own support system among your friends so when you need that safety net, you’ll find that it’s broken and you have nothing to catch you when you fall.

         

        I’ve personally never seen one instance of vaguebooking being a good thing. There may be a good use for it but if there is, I’ve looked high and low and have not found it. You can save yourself a lot of trouble, stress, and possibly even a friendship or two by not participating in vaguebooking. It simply isn’t worth the trouble.

        Featured photo credit: Bacon S’mores via baconsmores.com

        More by this author

        10 Benefits of Sleeping Naked You Probably Didn’t Know 12 Inspirational Speeches That Teach You the Most Valuable Life Lessons 15 Most Effective Cool Down Exercises For Every Workout 10 Things Guys Love That You Didn’t Expect 20 Google Search Tips to Use Google More Efficiently

        Trending in Communication

        1 7 Ways To Deal With Negative People 2 How to Talk to Strangers Without Feeling Awkward 3 What Are Interpersonal Skills? Master Them for Better Relationships 4 How To Stop Negative Thoughts from Killing Your Confidence 5 This 4-Year Old Girl’s Explanation On the Problem with New Year’s Resolutions Is Everything You Need

        Read Next

        Advertising
        Advertising
        Advertising

        Last Updated on January 18, 2019

        7 Ways To Deal With Negative People

        7 Ways To Deal With Negative People

        Some people will have a rain cloud hanging over them, no matter what the weather is outside. Their negative attitude is toxic to your own moods, and you probably feel like there is little you can do about it.

        But that couldn’t be farther from the truth.

        If you want to effectively deal with negative people and be a champion of positivity, then your best route is to take definite action through some of the steps below.

        1. Limit the time you spend with them.

        First, let’s get this out of the way. You can be more positive than a cartoon sponge, but even your enthusiasm has a chance of being afflicted by the constant negativity of a friend.

        Advertising

        In fact, negativity has been proven to damage your health physically, making you vulnerable to high levels of stress and even cardiac disease. There’s no reason to get hurt because of someone else’s bad mood.

        Though this may be a little tricky depending on your situation, working to spend slightly less time around negative people will keep your own spirits from slipping as well.

        2. Speak up for yourself.

        Don’t just absorb the comments that you are being bombarded with, especially if they are about you. It’s wise to be quick to listen and slow to speak, but being too quiet can give the person the impression that you are accepting what’s being said.

        3. Don’t pretend that their behavior is “OK.”

        This is an easy trap to fall into. Point out to the person that their constant negativity isn’t a good thing. We don’t want to do this because it’s far easier to let someone sit in their woes, and we’d rather just stay out of it.

        Advertising

        But if you want the best for this person, avoid giving the false impression that their negativity is normal.

        4. Don’t make their problems your problems.

        Though I consider empathy a gift, it can be a dangerous thing. When we hear the complaints of a friend or family member, we typically start to take on their burdens with them.

        This is a bad habit to get into, especially if this is a person who is almost exclusively negative. These types of people are prone to embellishing and altering a story in order to gain sympathy.

        Why else would they be sharing this with you?

        Advertising

        5. Change the subject.

        When you suspect that a conversation is starting to take a turn for the negative, be a champion of positivity by changing the subject. Of course, you have to do this without ignoring what the other person said.

        Acknowledge their comment, but move the conversation forward before the euphoric pleasure gained from complaining takes hold of either of you.

        6. Talk about solutions, not problems.

        Sometimes, changing the subject isn’t an option if you want to deal with negative people, but that doesn’t mean you can’t still be positive.

        I know that when someone begins dumping complaints on me, I have a hard time knowing exactly what to say. The key is to measure your responses as solution-based.

        Advertising

        You can do this by asking questions like, “Well, how could this be resolved?” or, “How do you think they feel about it?”

        Use discernment to find an appropriate response that will help your friend manage their perspectives.

        7. Leave them behind.

        Sadly, there are times when we have to move on without these friends, especially if you have exhausted your best efforts toward building a positive relationship.

        If this person is a family member, you can still have a functioning relationship with them, of course, but you may still have to limit the influence they have over your wellbeing.

        That being said, what are some steps you’ve taken to deal with negative people? Let us know in the comments.

        You may also want to read: How to Stop the Negative Spin of Thoughts, Emotions and Actions.

        Read Next