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25 Things To Do To Become A Well Liked Person

25 Things To Do To Become A Well Liked Person

Human nature means we long to be accepted and liked by everyone we meet. We always look for reasons why someone likes us or doesn’t like us.

In recent years, maybe you’ve started to lose and forget some of the key reasons why someone might like you. Now, you shouldn’t think of life as a popularity contest. Instead, you should think of it as the reason why you’ll find your next job, close on that big deal or find the love of your life.

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    Here are 25 things to do to become a well liked person:

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    1. Be generous with the words ‘please’ and ‘thank you’ – We may forget or simply don’t feel the need to use these words; however, they can be the catalyst that changes the interaction instantly.
    2. Hold doors open for everyone and anyone if the situation permits.
    3. Be plentiful with favors; however, never expect anything in return for helping out.
    4. Help, guide and advise whenever you can. You may be an expert in an area that few others are; therefore, your input will always be highly valued.
    5. Don’t be an “I know” or a “me too” person. Ask for advice and ask questions that will directly represent your similarities rather than saying “me too.”
    6. Instead of just saying, “me too,” you should use the opportunity to link interests. This will create a new level of rapport that saying “me too” just won’t.
    7. Listen, and listen carefully to what people have to say. If you do this correctly, you can ask meaningful questions that show you’re ‘in the moment’ with that other person.
    8. Be gracious with your compliments and praise. Just as humans seek to be liked, we also seek to have relevance and be acknowledged for our efforts.
    9. Try to temporarily adopt another person’s values and beliefs instead of standing your ground and arguing why you think what they believe in is wrong.
    10. Enthusiasm goes an incredibly long way, from speaking to handshakes. If done enthusiastically, then the other person has a reason to carry on interacting with you.
    11. Be warm and smile lots. It’s welcoming, attractive and also a key interaction starter.
    12. Be confident (not cocky) with yourself, what you’re saying, what you’re wearing and what you’re doing. People are attracted to “experts” who are generally confident in their abilities. Demonstrate this attitude and people will be willing to listen.
    13. Get involved in everything, especially if it’s well known that you dislike whatever it is you’re taking part in. People will always respect someone that goes out of their way to attempt to conquer a dislike or phobia.
    14. Be yourself with everyone. The last thing you need is to have a split personalities to deal with each group of friends and family members.
    15. Provoke the best in people even if they are hard to crack.
    16. Always be on time for everything. Making people wait tends to be seen as a sign of disrespect.
    17. Reply to messages and calls instantly (if possible). Again, it should be looked at in the same way as Tip 16.
    18. Have you learned to listen carefully yet? Because of this, you’ll remember birthdays and important dates, which can be brought up in conversation letting the person realize you do really listen.
    19. Focus on what’s going on in the lives of others and again remember important dates to bring back up in conversation.
    20. Give them your biggest asset–your time.
    21. Never look at your watch during conversation. It shows that you have somewhere more important to be. Again remain ‘in the moment.’
    22. Be positive and forget all things negative. Negativity is a huge drain on emotions and ultimately the interaction. No one wants that.
    23. Be vulnerable to an extent that it makes you easy to get along with, easy to offer advice to, and ultimately, easy to get along with.
    24. Be approachable. If you offer up a smile or show some form of vulnerability, people will be drawn to you.
    25. Most of all, remember peoples’ names. This is something which we are all bad at but with practice, this simple gesture can be a huge reason why people like you.

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    Last Updated on August 6, 2020

    6 Reasons Why You Should Think Before You Speak

    6 Reasons Why You Should Think Before You Speak

    We’ve all done it. That moment when a series of words slithers from your mouth and the instant regret manifests through blushing and profuse apologies. If you could just think before you speak! It doesn’t have to be like this, and with a bit of practice, it’s actually quite easy to prevent.

    “Think twice before you speak, because your words and influence will plant the seed of either success or failure in the mind of another.” – Napolean Hill

    Are we speaking the same language?

    My mum recently left me a note thanking me for looking after her dog. She’d signed it with “LOL.” In my world, this means “laugh out loud,” and in her world it means “lots of love.” My kids tell me things are “sick” when they’re good, and ”manck” when they’re bad (when I say “bad,” I don’t mean good!). It’s amazing that we manage to communicate at all.

    When speaking, we tend to color our language with words and phrases that have become personal to us, things we’ve picked up from our friends, families and even memes from the internet. These colloquialisms become normal, and we expect the listener (or reader) to understand “what we mean.” If you really want the listener to understand your meaning, try to use words and phrases that they might use.

    Am I being lazy?

    When you’ve been in a relationship for a while, a strange metamorphosis takes place. People tend to become lazier in the way that they communicate with each other, with less thought for the feelings of their partner. There’s no malice intended; we just reach a “comfort zone” and know that our partners “know what we mean.”

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    Here’s an exchange from Psychology Today to demonstrate what I mean:

    Early in the relationship:

    “Honey, I don’t want you to take this wrong, but I’m noticing that your hair is getting a little thin on top. I know guys are sensitive about losing their hair, but I don’t want someone else to embarrass you without your expecting it.”

    When the relationship is established:

    “Did you know that you’re losing a lot of hair on the back of your head? You’re combing it funny and it doesn’t help. Wear a baseball cap or something if you feel weird about it. Lots of guys get thin on top. It’s no big deal.”

    It’s pretty clear which of these statements is more empathetic and more likely to be received well. Recognizing when we do this can be tricky, but with a little practice it becomes easy.

    Have I actually got anything to say?

    When I was a kid, my gran used to say to me that if I didn’t have anything good to say, I shouldn’t say anything at all. My gran couldn’t stand gossip, so this makes total sense, but you can take this statement a little further and modify it: “If you don’t have anything to say, then don’t say anything at all.”

    A lot of the time, people speak to fill “uncomfortable silences,” or because they believe that saying something, anything, is better than staying quiet. It can even be a cause of anxiety for some people.

    When somebody else is speaking, listen. Don’t wait to speak. Listen. Actually hear what that person is saying, think about it, and respond if necessary.

    Am I painting an accurate picture?

    One of the most common forms of miscommunication is the lack of a “referential index,” a type of generalization that fails to refer to specific nouns. As an example, look at these two simple phrases: “Can you pass me that?” and “Pass me that thing over there!”. How often have you said something similar?

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    How is the listener supposed to know what you mean? The person that you’re talking to will start to fill in the gaps with something that may very well be completely different to what you mean. You’re thinking “pass me the salt,” but you get passed the pepper. This can be infuriating for the listener, and more importantly, can create a lack of understanding and ultimately produce conflict.

    Before you speak, try to label people, places and objects in a way that it is easy for any listeners to understand.

    What words am I using?

    It’s well known that our use of nouns and verbs (or lack of them) gives an insight into where we grew up, our education, our thoughts and our feelings.

    Less well known is that the use of pronouns offers a critical insight into how we emotionally code our sentences. James Pennebaker’s research in the 1990’s concluded that function words are important keys to someone’s psychological state and reveal much more than content words do.

    Starting a sentence with “I think…” demonstrates self-focus rather than empathy with the speaker, whereas asking the speaker to elaborate or quantify what they’re saying clearly shows that you’re listening and have respect even if you disagree.

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    Is the map really the territory?

    Before speaking, we sometimes construct a scenario that makes us act in a way that isn’t necessarily reflective of the actual situation.

    A while ago, John promised to help me out in a big way with a project that I was working on. After an initial meeting and some big promises, we put together a plan and set off on its execution. A week or so went by, and I tried to get a hold of John to see how things were going. After voice mails and emails with no reply and general silence, I tried again a week later and still got no response.

    I was frustrated and started to get more than a bit vexed. The project obviously meant more to me than it did to him, and I started to construct all manner of crazy scenarios. I finally got through to John and immediately started a mild rant about making promises you can’t keep. He stopped me in my tracks with the news that his brother had died. If I’d have just thought before I spoke…

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