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20 Signs You’re A Charming Person Though You Are Not Aware

20 Signs You’re A Charming Person Though You Are Not Aware

Charm according to the dictionary is the quality of attracting or fascinating others. Charm is the ability to make other people like you and the mistaken belief that this comes natural can be cancerous. Whether you are being liked or not is under your control. Here are 20 signs that prove you are charming person even if you are not aware of it.

1. You are sincere

“The easiest way to gain someone’s trust is to deserve it. This should be pretty easy, assuming you’re just being you and being real. Minimal effort too.”
― Ashly Lorenzana

People like it when you are honest. No one likes a fake. When you are sincere people will be drawn to you because they know they can trust you.

2. You are confident when you speak

You are meticulous and disciplined when you speak to someone.

3. You are attentive

“Charm is getting people to say “yes” without ever having to ask them a question.”
― Connie Brockway, The Bridal Season

During conversations you are not a bully but you are also attentive to what the other person is saying.

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4. You are patient

“He’s an indulgent sort of man……

With a quick lip and a fierce tongue, the sort of tongue that draws you in with charm and words of praise, awkward silences and desperate worships.”
― Coco J. Ginger

You speak only when appropriate rather than try to prove you are the most intelligent person in the room.

5. You have a positive attitude

People can discern if you love to retreat and give in to criticism. However you are charming when you show you have a positive mental attitude.

6. You are inquisitive

“I think charm is the ability to be truly interested in other people”
― Richard Avedon

You show you are concerned about the other person by asking questions and displaying a sense of curiosity.

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7. You are a people person

You love to engage in real life conversations rather than hide behind gadgets.

8. You don’t pass judgement

You are not quick to judge people’s character or condemn them for their mistakes. No one likes to be around people who are rigid in their opinions.

9. You don’t try to seek unnecessary attention

Desperately seeking attention can piss people off. By being friendly and considerate you put people at ease when they are around you.

10. You have an open mind

In trying to increase your network you don’t shut off new ideas and stop looking for a new people to associate with. People like people who are willing to seek new grounds.

11. You don’t take life too seriously

You smile and can laugh over issues, mistakes or humorous comments. By doing this you allow people to lower their guards when they are around you.

12. You don’t procrastinate

You are not afraid to take action. People are turned off when you hesitate to make decisions or take actions.

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13. You praise others

“It is a great mistake for men to give up paying compliments, for when they give up saying what is charming, they give up thinking what is charming.”
― Oscar Wilde

They genuinely praise others and are not sycophants. If they see a good deed or trait in someone, they are willing to acknowledge it and commend such person.

14. You make a solid first impression

“Charm was a scheme for making strangers like and trust a person immediately, no matter what the charmer had in mind.”
― Kurt Vonnegut, Breakfast of Champions

Within the first few seconds of meeting you people are able to judge or make a decision about you. By having a distinctive body language you show you are likable. Whether it is in your posture, handshake or smile you create a remarkable first impression.

15. You are always willing to perform an act of kindness

People let down their guard when you show kindness. The most charming people out there are people who are willing to offer a good deed without expecting anything in return.

16. You are composed even in difficult situations

You don’t over react to positive or negative situations but you keep your cool. Silence can be more effective than angry words.

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17. You remember people’s name

People love it when you remember their names. A name is an essential part of everyone’s identity. When you can remember their names during a conversation, you charm people.

18. You don’t brood over failures

“A man can become so accustomed to the thought of his own faults that he will begin to cherish them as charming little “personal characteristics.” – Helen Rowland

Instead of brooding over failure you learn from it and use it in your personal growth. People love and admire people who grow from failure rather than reel in it.

19. You are highly considerate of the other person you are speaking to

When you speak to someone, you regard the person as the most important person in the world. You value their time and offer undivided attention.

20. They know when and who to open up to

You know you are not perfect. You are careful to avoid sharing your personal problems with everybody. Rather you have confidants you can open to and who honestly offers you his/her opinion to help you grow.

Featured photo credit: young stylish blonde hipster man in the park via shutterstock.com

More by this author

Casey Imafidon

Specialized in motivation and personal growth, providing advice to make readers fulfilled and spurred on to achieve all that they desire in life.

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Last Updated on February 11, 2021

Easily Misunderstood by Others? 6 Barriers You Should Overcome to Make Communication Less Frustrating

Easily Misunderstood by Others? 6 Barriers You Should Overcome to Make Communication Less Frustrating

How often have you said something simple, only to have the person who you said this to misunderstand it or twist the meaning completely around? Nodding your head in affirmative? Then this means that you are being unclear in your communication.

Communication should be simple, right? It’s all about two people or more talking and explaining something to the other. The problem lies in the talking itself, somehow we end up being unclear, and our words, attitude or even the way of talking becomes a barrier in communication, most of the times unknowingly. We give you six common barriers to communication, and how to get past them; for you to actually say what you mean, and or the other person to understand it as well…

The 6 Walls You Need to Break Down to Make Communication Effective

Think about it this way, a simple phrase like “what do you mean” can be said in many different ways and each different way would end up “communicating” something else entirely. Scream it at the other person, and the perception would be anger. Whisper this is someone’s ear and others may take it as if you were plotting something. Say it in another language, and no one gets what you mean at all, if they don’t speak it… This is what we mean when we say that talking or saying something that’s clear in your head, many not mean that you have successfully communicated it across to your intended audience – thus what you say and how, where and why you said it – at times become barriers to communication.[1]

Perceptual Barrier

The moment you say something in a confrontational, sarcastic, angry or emotional tone, you have set up perceptual barriers to communication. The other person or people to whom you are trying to communicate your point get the message that you are disinterested in what you are saying and sort of turn a deaf ear. In effect, you are yelling your point across to person who might as well be deaf![2]

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The problem: When you have a tone that’s not particularly positive, a body language that denotes your own disinterest in the situation and let your own stereotypes and misgivings enter the conversation via the way you talk and gesture, the other person perceives what you saying an entirely different manner than say if you said the same while smiling and catching their gaze.

The solution: Start the conversation on a positive note, and don’t let what you think color your tone, gestures of body language. Maintain eye contact with your audience, and smile openly and wholeheartedly…

Attitudinal Barrier

Some people, if you would excuse the language, are simply badass and in general are unable to form relationships or even a common point of communication with others, due to their habit of thinking to highly or too lowly of them. They basically have an attitude problem – since they hold themselves in high esteem, they are unable to form genuine lines of communication with anyone. The same is true if they think too little of themselves as well.[3]

The problem: If anyone at work, or even in your family, tends to roam around with a superior air – anything they say is likely to be taken by you and the others with a pinch, or even a bag of salt. Simply because whenever they talk, the first thing to come out of it is their condescending attitude. And in case there’s someone with an inferiority complex, their incessant self-pity forms barriers to communication.

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The solution: Use simple words and an encouraging smile to communicate effectively – and stick to constructive criticism, and not criticism because you are a perfectionist. If you see someone doing a good job, let them know, and disregard the thought that you could have done it better. It’s their job so measure them by industry standards and not your own.

Language Barrier

This is perhaps the commonest and the most inadvertent of barriers to communication. Using big words, too much of technical jargon or even using just the wrong language at the incorrect or inopportune time can lead to a loss or misinterpretation of communication. It may have sounded right in your head and to your ears as well, but if sounded gobbledygook to the others, the purpose is lost.

The problem: Say you are trying to explain a process to the newbies and end up using every technical word and industry jargon that you knew – your communication has failed if the newbie understood zilch. You have to, without sounding patronizing, explain things to someone in the simplest language they understand instead of the most complex that you do.

The solution: Simplify things for the other person to understand you, and understand it well. Think about it this way: if you are trying to explain something scientific to a child, you tone it down to their thinking capacity, without “dumbing” anything down in the process.[4]

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Emotional Barrier

Sometimes, we hesitate in opening our mouths, for fear of putting our foot in it! Other times, our emotional state is so fragile that we keep it and our lips zipped tightly together lest we explode. This is the time that our emotions become barriers to communication.[5]

The problem: Say you had a fight at home and are on a slow boil, muttering, in your head, about the injustice of it all. At this time, you have to give someone a dressing down over their work performance. You are likely to transfer at least part of your angst to the conversation then, and talk about unfairness in general, leaving the other person stymied about what you actually meant!

The solution: Remove your emotions and feelings to a personal space, and talk to the other person as you normally would. Treat any phobias or fears that you have and nip them in the bud so that they don’t become a problem. And remember, no one is perfect.

Cultural Barrier

Sometimes, being in an ever-shrinking world means that inadvertently, rules can make cultures clash and cultural clashes can turn into barriers to communication. The idea is to make your point across without hurting anyone’s cultural or religious sentiments.

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The problem: There are so many ways culture clashes can happen during communication and with cultural clashes; it’s not always about ethnicity. A non-smoker may have problems with smokers taking breaks; an older boss may have issues with younger staff using the Internet too much.

The solution: Communicate only what is necessary to get the point across – and eave your personal sentiments or feelings out of it. Try to be accommodative of the other’s viewpoint, and in case you still need to work it out, do it one to one, to avoid making a spectacle of the other person’s beliefs.[6]

Gender Barrier

Finally, it’s about Men from Mars and Women from Venus. Sometimes, men don’t understand women and women don’t get men – and this gender gap throws barriers in communication. Women tend to take conflict to their graves, literally, while men can move on instantly. Women rely on intuition, men on logic – so inherently, gender becomes a big block in successful communication.[7]

The problem: A male boss may inadvertently rub his female subordinates the wrong way with anti-feminism innuendoes, or even have problems with women taking too many family leaves. Similarly, women sometimes let their emotions get the better of them, something a male audience can’t relate to.

The solution: Talk to people like people – don’t think or classify them into genders and then talk accordingly. Don’t make comments or innuendos that are gender biased – you don’t have to come across as an MCP or as a bra-burning feminist either. Keep gender out of it.

And remember, the key to successful communication is simply being open, making eye contact and smiling intermittently. The battle is usually half won when you say what you mean in simple, straightforward words and keep your emotions out of it.

Reference

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