Advertising
Advertising

17 Things Only PhD Students Would Understand

17 Things Only PhD Students Would Understand

No mater what topic you’re researching, there are a few things that many PhD students have in common. Some good, some bad, some downright ugly. How many of these sound familiar?

1. You feel like an imposter all the time

PhDs are something that clever people do. You spend the first few months thinking you’ll start to feel like one of those clever people soon… But you’ll soon realise it never happens and you worry that on graduation day they’ll finally catch you out and refuse to award you your doctorate.

2. You worry that your students will outsmart you

If you wind up teaching undergraduates, you worry that you’ll get a super smart one who knows way more than you do. You practice ‘looking clever’ in the hope that they’ll fall for it. You’re not sure they will…

3. Sometimes you read what you’ve written and find you’re in awe of yourself

You’re constantly in awe of all those amazing academics around you – and sometimes you even find yourself in awe of you! Reading back old papers you’ve written, you find yourself nodding in agreement with the wise sage who wrote them and thinking they sound like they were written by someone really, really clever rather than little old you.

Advertising

4. You are addicted to studying

You love to learn. You can’t get enough of it and find yourself wondering what you will study next when you’ve completed your PhD. You’ve been contemplating what your next academic endeavour should be since you were about two months into your PhD.

5. When your research is going well, you get so engrossed you practically forget to draw breath

Eating and sleeping don’t really happen. You don’t hear anything around you, you’re in the research zone and nothing else matters.

6. You go through nocturnal periods

You end up in weird wake–sleep cycles of staying up really late because you’re so hooked on your work, only to crash out and sleep as the rest of the world is ready to start a new day. This cycle can last for weeks at a time.

7. You dream about your research

Especially during your more intense studying periods, you think about your research all day and all night. Occasionally you make amazing discoveries in your sleep and are hugely disappointed when you wake up and discover your discoveries were all just a dream.

Advertising

8. You are more likely to quote papers written by people with memorable names

When people have really complicated names that you find hard to spell or remember, you find yourself quoting them less. Consequently you find yourself worrying about how memorable your own name is and whether you should rebrand yourself to maximise your impact factor.

9. You know where all the cheapest coffee shops are

You’re living on a super skinny budget but you need coffee and you need to escape the lab or library pretty regularly or you’d grow hysterical so you head out for coffee. You know where to find the best, cheapest coffee. You don’t go anywhere without your coffee shop loyalty cards and you work your day around coffee happy hour.

10. You know exactly where all electrical outlets are located in all the cheapest coffee shops

Once you’ve arrived at your favourite coffee shop, you head straight to the seat where it’s not too noisy, there’s plenty of natural light and there’s a socket to plug in your computer. You know exactly where this perfect spot is located in at least three different coffee shops.

11. You know more than anyone in the world about one teeny tiny thing…

When it comes to your research niche you know more about it than anyone else the entire world. That’s really kind of cool.

Advertising

12. …But you’re the only person who cares about that teeny tiny thing

So no one else cares about this teeny tiny niche you know inside out and upside down. You discover this every time you try to talk to anyone about it. Most people just look overwhelmed and under-excited whilst some people look outright bored.

13. You bore even yourself sometimes

You’re pretty sure that by the time you’ve finished writing your thesis, you’ll never EVER want to talk about your research topic ever again.

14. You get really excited if your research topic is even tangentially relevant in every day life

It doesn’t happen often, but the once or twice in your entire life that you feel your teeny tiny research niche is relevant to every day conversation, you feel like the king of the world.

15. Your idea of fame is being quoted in New Scientist

Or the equivalent for your subject. You dream about it happening some far off day when you’re really clever and well published and everyone is hanging off your every word. It could happen…

Advertising

16. You can’t wait to be called ‘Doctor’

You’ve secretly rehearsed calling yourself doctor. You tell everyone you’re not doing a PhD for the title or credentials but rather because you are deeply passionate about your subject. But as the end draws closer you cannot wait to be called doctor and will insist that absolutely everyone uses your proper title – and rightly so. You earned it!

17. You have no idea where your life is headed

You dream of graduating but you have literally no idea what happens next. You figure that you’ll work out what you want to do when you grow up at some point, but it hasn’t happened yet.

Featured photo credit: MacBook Pro by VFS Digital Design via flickr.com

More by this author

This Is What Depression Feels Like – In The Words of Sufferers 10 Tips for Raising a Child with High Self-Esteem 9 Things To Remember When Your Friend is Struggling With Depression 17 Things Only PhD Students Would Understand 8 Unrealistic Expectations Students Always Have Before Exams

Trending in Communication

1 How to Deal With Anger (The Ultimate Anger Management Guide) 2 The Hidden Power of Every Single Person Around You 3 The Purpose Of Friendship: The Only 4 Types Of Friends You Need In Life 4 14 Things That Make You Happy and Enjoy Life More 5 Focus On Yourself, Because Most Of The Time No One Really Cares

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising
Advertising

Last Updated on April 19, 2021

How to Deal With Anger (The Ultimate Anger Management Guide)

How to Deal With Anger (The Ultimate Anger Management Guide)

We all lose our temper from time to time, and expressing anger is actually a healthy thing to do in our relationships with others. Expressing our differences in opinion allows us to have healthy conflict and many times come to an agreement or understanding that works for everyone. However, there are times when anger can become overwhelming or damaging, and during these times, it’s important to learn how to deal with anger.

Expressing anger inappropriately can be harmful to relationships, both personal and professional. You may express too much anger, too often, or at times that are only going to make things worse, not better. In this article we will look at anger management techniques that will help you better control your emotions.

Let’s take a deeper look at how to deal with anger.

Expressing Anger

Anger is a natural and normal part of almost any relationship. This includes relationships with your significant other, kids, boss, friends, family, etc. Anger provides us with valuable information if we are willing to listen to it. It clues us in to areas where we disagree with others and things that need to be changed or altered.

Unhealthy Ways to Express Anger

Here are some common yet unhealthy ways to express anger that you should avoid:

Being Passive-Aggressive

This is a term many of us are familiar with. Passive-aggressive behavior happens when someone is angry but uses indirect communication to express their anger.

Some of the more common passive-aggressive behaviors include the silent treatment, making comments about someone behind their back, being grumpy, moody, or pouting, or simply not doing tasks or assignments that they should.

This is a passive-aggressive person’s way of showing their anger. It’s not very productive but extremely common.

Advertising

Poorly-Timed

Some people get overwhelmed and express anger in a situation where it can’t really do any good.

An example would be getting angry at one person in front of a crowd of people. All that does is make people uncomfortable and shuts them down. It’s not a healthy way to express anger or disagreement with someone.

Ongoing Anger

Being angry all the time is most often a symptom of something else. It’s healthy and normal to express anger when you disagree with someone. However, if someone is angry most of the time and always seems to be expressing their anger to everyone around them, this won’t serve them well.

Over time, people will start to avoid this person and have as little contact as possible. The reason being is no one likes being around someone who is angry all the time; it’s a no-win situation.

Healthy Ways to Express Anger

What about the healthy ways[1] to adapt? When learning how to deal with anger, here are some healthy ways to get you started.

Being Honest

Express your anger or disagreement honestly. Be truthful about what it is that is making you angry. Sometimes this will entail walking away and thinking about it for a bit before you respond.

Don’t say you’re mad at something someone did or said when it’s really something else that upset you.

Being Direct

Similar to being honest, being direct is a healthy way to express anger.

Advertising

Don’t talk around something that is making you angry. Don’t say that one thing is making you angry when it’s really something else, and don’t stack items on top of each other so you can unload on someone about 10 different things 6 months from now.

Be direct and upfront about what is making you angry. Ensure you are expressing your anger to the person who upset you or you are angry at, not to someone else. This is very counterproductive.

Being Timely

When something makes you angry, it’s much better to express it in a timely manner. Don’t keep it bottled up inside of you, as that’s only going to do more harm than good.

Think of the marriages that seem to go up in flames out of nowhere when the reality is someone kept quiet for years until they hit their breaking point.

Expressing anger as it occurs is a much healthier way of using anger to help us guide our relationships in the moment.

How to Deal With Anger

If you feel angry, how should you deal with it right at that moment?

1. Slow Down

From time to time, I receive an email at work that makes me so angry that steam is probably pouring out of my ears.

In my less restrained moments, I have been known to fire off a quick response, and that typically has ended about as well as you might imagine.

Advertising

When I actually walk away from my computer and go do something else for a while, I am able to calm down and think more rationally. After that happens, I am able to respond in a more appropriate and productive manner. Doing things that helps you learn how to release anger can make an uncomfortable situation more manageable before it gets out of hand.

2. Focus on the “I”

Remember that you are the one that’s upset. Don’t accuse people of making you upset because, in the end, it’s your response to what someone did that really triggered your anger. You don’t want to place blame by saying something like “Why don’t you ever put away your dishes?” Say something more like “Having dirty dishes laying on the counter upsets me—can you work with me to come to a solution?”

When you are accusatory towards someone, all that does is increase the tension. This doesn’t usually do anything except make your anger rise higher.

3. Work out

When learning how to deal with anger, exercise is a great outlet. If something happens that angers you, see if you have the opportunity to burn off some of the anger.

Being able to hit the gym to get a hard workout in is great. If this isn’t an option, see if you can go for a run or a bike ride. If you are at work when you become angry and the weather permits, at least go outside for a brisk walk.

Besides working some of your anger out through exercise, this also helps to give your mind a chance to work through some ways to address what it is that upset you.

If you’re not sure where to start with an exercise routine, check out Lifehack’s free Simple Cardio Home Workout Plan.

4. Seek Help When Needed

There are times when we could all use some help. Life can be stressful and overwhelming. It’s perfectly fine to seek some help from a mental health professional if it will help you get back to a healthy balance.If you find that you are angry all the time, it might be a good idea to go talk to an expert about learning to control intense emotions. They can give you some sound advice and ideas on how to get your anger to a more manageable and healthy level.

Advertising

5. Practice Relaxation

We all seem to lead incredibly busy lives, and that’s a good thing if we are loving the life we are living. That being said, it is very beneficial to our physical and mental well-being to take time out for relaxation.

That can mean spending time doing things that help us calm down and relax, like being around people we enjoy, practicing deep breathing or listening to music. It could be making time for things that help bring us balance like a healthy diet and physical activity.

Many people incorporate techniques such as yoga and meditation to calm their minds and release tension when learning how to deal with anger. Whatever your choice is, ensure you take time out to relax when warning signs of anger start to bubble up.

6. Laugh

Incorporating humor and laughter on a regular basis will help keep anger in check and help you get over a bad mood and feelings of anger more quickly. This isn’t part of formal anger management techniques, but you’ll be surprised by how well it works. Remember, life is a journey that’s meant to be enjoyed fully along the way through healthy emotion. Make sure you take time to laugh and have fun.Surround yourself with people that like to laugh and enjoy life. Don’t work at a job that just causes you stress, which can lead to anger. Work at something you enjoy doing.

7. Be Grateful

It’s easy to focus on the bad in life and the things that cause us negative emotions. It’s vitally important to remind ourselves of all the wonderful things in life that bring us positive emotions, things that we easily forget because we get caught up in the whirlwind of day to day life.

Take time out each day to remind yourself of a few things you are grateful for in order to help you learn how to release anger and invite in more positive feelings.

Final Thoughts

Life can be overwhelming at times. We seem to have constant pressure to achieve more and to always be on the go or motivated. People we are around and situations we are in can cause stress, anger, and negative emotions. At times, it can seem to be too much, and we get angry and our emotions start to get out of control.

During these times, keep in mind that life is an incredible journey, full of wonder and things that bring you joy. When you find yourself angry more often than is healthy, take time out to remember the good things in life—the things that we seem to forget yet bring us so much positive energy and emotions.

Use some of the tips included here to help with how to deal with anger and better control your emotions.

More Resources on Anger Management

Featured photo credit: Andre Hunter via unsplash.com

Reference

Read Next