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Last Updated on January 5, 2021

17 Things People With Emotional Strength Don’t Do

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17 Things People With Emotional Strength Don’t Do

Life is a series of stories, and each one of us has a unique story to tell. There are billions upon billions of stories, and no two are exactly the same. If the story of your life has been filled with more sad moments than happy ones, it’s time to change that, and the best place to start is by building emotional strength

You have the power to create the life you want. One crucial skill that will help you get there is learning how to become emotionally strong. The good news is emotional strength is like a muscle: the more you use it, the stronger it becomes.

“Once you believe you are strong emotionally, you will unconsciously act stronger than before and begin to take control over your emotional whims.” –Senora Roy

In this article, you’ll learn how to be strong emotionally. Here’re 17 things people with emotional strength don’t do. Learn from these and start creating the existence you’ve always imagined for yourself.

1. They Don’t Beg for Attention

Emotional strength means confidence, and confident people don’t need to constantly be the center of attention. They’re comfortable in their own skin and are able to share the spotlight when necessary. Because they feel good about themselves, they don’t need the approval of others.

2. They Don’t Allow Others to Bring Them Down

People with emotional strength ignore the haters and the naysayers. They weed these people out and surround themselves with positive people instead.

This doesn’t mean that they don’t feel negative emotions when someone says something hurtful. They are simply able to hold those negative thoughts with love and acceptance, work through the pain, and move on.

3. They Don’t Stop Believing in Themselves

“Somehow I can’t believe that there are any heights that can’t be scaled by a man who knows the secrets of making dreams come true. This special secret, it seems to me, can be summarized in four C’s: They are curiosity, confidence, courage, and constancy, and the greatest of all is confidence. When you believe in a thing, believe in it all the way, implicitly and unquestionable.” –Walt Disney

Soak up these amazing words from Walt Disney because belief is the most essential quality of emotional strength. When you work from a place of self-confidence, each failure becomes a lesson that continues to propel you toward a better future.

4. They Are Not Afraid to Love

“Love is the force that transforms and improves the Soul of the World.” –Paulo Coelho

People who possess emotional strength have experienced heartbreak, but it doesn’t hold them back; it makes them stronger. Just because you’ve been hurt doesn’t mean you should shut love out of your life.

Open up your heart and embrace vulnerability. The love you find will be worth everything you go through to get it.

5. They’re Not Afraid of Slowing Down

Sometimes you need to take a step back and slow it down when you’ve been pushing yourself too hard in order to manage stress. Having drive is great, but not at the expense of your health and well-being

When people with emotional strength are feeling overwhelmed, they allow time for reflection and relaxation in order to maintain a sense of focus and positivity and improve their mental health.

6. They Refuse to Be a Victim of Circumstance

Being emotionally strong means refusing to make excuses. Everyone is born into different circumstances and receive a different starting line in life. People with emotional strength don’t feel bad about where they’ve started; they look forward and try to find the best way to get where they want to go.

Leave the past behind you and focus on getting a little better every day.

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7. They Don’t Have a Problem Saying No

Saying no is one of the most important things you’ll ever learn how to do[1]. When you learn how to say no, you’ll make time for the things that really matter to you. Focus on your top priorities and say no to all the stuff that’s wasting your time.

8. They Don’t Back Down From Challenges

Emotionally strong people see challenges as opportunities to grow and improve their life. Challenges happen for a reason, and only when we have overcome them will we understand why they were there.

9. They Don’t Do Things They Don’t Want to Do

If you want to keep your emotional balance and sanity intact, do what you love. Get rid of baggage and commitments that are making you miserable.

People with emotional strength know that spending their very limited time doing things that make them miserable is the best way to waste their life.

10. They Don’t Forget That Happiness Is a Decision

People who have learned how to be strong emotionally know that happiness is a choice. They understand the things they need to really be happy. They choose a life of simplicity, productivity, and passion.

Furthermore, they practice gratitude in their everyday life in order to focus on each of the good things they have in the present moment. This helps them build mental strength for when they need to face difficult times.

11. They Don’t Waste Time

Abraham Lincoln said,

“It’s not the years in your life that count. It’s the life in your years.”

Mentally strong people don’t waste time doing mindless activities. They live mindfully in the present, enjoying every day as if it’s their last. They spend their time on things that are important to them and things that will help them achieve their goals in the long run.

12. They Aren’t Afraid to Ask for Help

Every single one of the great minds in history, from Einstein to Edison, had help along the way. You can’t do it all alone, and it takes a person with emotional strength to swallow their pride and ask for help.

Here’s How to Ask for Help When You Feel Silly to Do So.

13. They Don’t Hold Themselves Back

Self-handicapping is a common trait among emotionally weak people. What this means is you make excuses and find ways to justify your inadequacies instead of finding ways to improve on them. If you want to change something, stop holding yourself back.

14. They Don’t Mind Working Harder Than Others

“The heights by great men reached and kept were not attained by sudden flight, but they, while their companions slept, were toiling upward in the night.” –Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

Soak in these poetic words from Longfellow. Put in the work, and you’ll get the results you’re looking for.

15. They Don’t Overreact to Things Beyond Their Control

Charles Swindoll said,

“Life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it.”

Think about how many times a day you overreact to things that really don’t matter. When you start to feel your blood boil, take a deep breath and ask yourself, “Is this really worth getting stressed out over?” Ninety-nine percent of the time, you’ll realize the answer is no.

People with emotional strength have developed a sense of mental balance that help them respond appropriately to each obstacle in their path.

16. They Don’t Settle for a Mediocre Life

Emotionally strong people don’t settle for mediocrity, even when times get tough. They strive to achieve greatness by setting goals, making plans, solving problems, and digging deep to find motivation each day.

17. They Never Give up

Being emotionally strong means staring adversity in the face, learning from your mistakes, and living to fight another day. I’ll leave you with this inspiring quote from Harriet Beecher Stowe:

“When you get into a tight place and everything goes against you, till it seems as though you could not hang on a minute longer, never give up then, for that is just the place and time that the tide will turn.”

The Bottom Line

No one is born with emotional strength. It comes from years of struggle and working through difficult moments and emotions. People who have learned how to be strong emotionally didn’t get there because life was easy.

Learn from the points above in order to further develop your own emotional strength and fight for the life that you deserve.

More on Building Emotional Strength

Featured photo credit: Conner Ching via unsplash.com

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Reference

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Scott Christ

Scott Christ is a writer, entrepreneur, and founder of Pure Food Company.

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Last Updated on July 21, 2021

How to Get “I Can’t Do It” Out of Your Vocabulary

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How to Get “I Can’t Do It” Out of Your Vocabulary

When someone says, “I can’t do it” . . . I say to myself, “What do you mean you can’t do it?” Maybe you don’t want to do it, but saying you “can’t” do it is a completely different story.

With the right mindset, positive attitude, and a clear vision of what you want to accomplish, the only thing that is holding you back is yourself.

Can’t is a terrible word and it has to be taken out of your vocabulary.

By saying you can’t do something, you’re already doubting yourself, submitting to defeat, and you’re making that barrier around your life tighter.

So today, right now, we are going to remove this word for good.

From now on there is nothing we can’t do.

“Attitude is Tattoo”

Your attitude is everything; it’s your reason, your why and how, your facial expression, emotions, body language, and potentially the end result. How you approach an opportunity, and the result of it, is solely based on you — not your boss or your co-worker or friend.

If you enter a business meeting with a sour attitude, that negative energy can spread like wildfire. People can also feel it — maybe even taste it. This is not an impression you want to leave.

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Now imagine you enter a business meeting with a positive attitude, that whatever happens in here is going to be your result, in your control, not someone else’s. Of course, we can’t always win, but even if the outcome is negative, your attitude and perception can turn it into a positive. The question is: can you do it?

Of course you can, because there is nothing in this world you can’t do.

It’s much better to be known for your positive attitude — your poise, your energy, the reason why things go so well because you are able to maintain such character. A negative attitude is easy. It’s easy to complain, it’s easy to be mad, and it’s even easier to do nothing to change it.

When I say your “attitude is tattoo”, it sounds permanent. Tattoos can be removed, but that’s not the point. Your attitude is like a tattoo because you wear it. People can see it and sometimes, they will judge you on it. If you maintain a negative attitude, then it is permanent until you change it.

Change your attitude and I guarantee the results change as well.

Believe You Can Do It

Do you know why most people say “can’t” and doubt themselves before trying anything?

It’s our lack of self-confidence and fear on many different levels. The one thing we have to purge from ourselves is fear — fear of bad results, fear of change, fear of denial, fear of loss, the fear that makes us worry and lose sleep. Worrying is the same as going outside with an umbrella, waiting for rain to hit it. Stop worrying and move on.

Confidence is fragile: It builds up slowly, but can shatter like glass. Project your confidence and energy into believing in yourself. This is a very important and groundbreaking step — one that is usually the hardest to take. Start telling yourself you can do something, anything, and you will do it the best to your ability. Remove doubt, remove fear, and stick with positive energy.

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Learn how to boost your confidence: How to Be Confident: 62 Proven Ways to Build Self-Confidence

Embrace Failure

Do not fear failure. Do not run away from it. Face it, learn from it, grow, and take action. Just remember: You will never know success if you have never failed.

Your confidence will bolster after embracing these facts. You will be immune to demoralizing results, and instead you will find ways to fix it, improve upon it, and make it better than before. You will learn to never say “can’t,” and will realize how many more opportunities you can create by removing that one word.

Don’t let one simple and ugly word plague your confidence. You’re better and stronger than that.

Start Making the Change

But to actually start the process of change is very challenging.

Why is that?

Fear? Time? Don’t know how — or where — to start?

It’s hard because what we’re doing is unlearning what we know. We are used to doing things a certain way, and chances are we’ve been doing them for years.

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So here are some ways that I avoid using the word “can’t”, and actually take the steps to put forth the change that I wish to see. I hope you can incorporate these methods into your life.

Write down What You Want to Change

Write it on post-its, notecards, whatever makes you comfortable — something you will always see. I usually write mine on post-its and put them all over the wall behind my monitor so I always see them.

Tell a Friend and Talk About It

Discussing your goals, what you want to change, is very effective when you say it out loud and tell another person other than yourself. It’s almost like saying, hey, I bet I can do it — watch me.

When you fulfill that goal and tell your friend, it feels rewarding and will motivate you to do it again in a different aspect. Who knows? Maybe your friend adopts the same mindset as you.

Stop Yourself from Saying the Forbidden Word

Sometimes,I can’t control myself in public when I’m with friends, so I have to be careful with the words I use so I don’t embarrass or insult anyone.

Treat the word “can’t” as the worst word you can possibly use. Stop yourself from saying it, mid-sentence if you must, and turn your whole perspective around — you can do it, you will do it, and nothing is impossible!

Repetition, Repetition, Repetition

You think this change will be overnight? No way. This is a practice. Something you’re going to be doing for the rest of your life from now until forever.

As I said earlier, you are unlearning what you know. You know how easy it is to say you can’t do something, so by unlearning this easy practice, you’re self-disciplining yourself to live without boundaries.

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Practice this everyday, a little at a time, and before you know it, the word can’t will not be part of your language.

Do Anything That Can Relieve Your Uncertainty

When I catch myself saying I can’t do something or I don’t know something, looking up information on that action or subject, doing research, educating yourself, relieves that uncertainty.

Sometimes, we think we can’t do something because the whole idea of it seems too large. We skip the small steps in our head and only focus on the end.

Before you say you can’t do something, rewind and slow down a little bit. Focus on what the first step is, then the next. Take it a step at a time, and before you know it you will have done something you previously thought you couldn’t do.

Final Thoughts

You know what you must do. The first step is right now. Once you begin this habit, and really start noticing some change, you’ll realize the door to opportunity is everywhere.

The funny thing is: Those doors have always been there. The evil word that we no longer use put a veil over our eyes because that’s how powerful that word is.

More Tips for Strengthening Your Resilience

Featured photo credit: Cata via unsplash.com

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