Advertising
Advertising

Running From Problems Makes Life Harder: 4 Steps To Face Everything Bravely

Running From Problems Makes Life Harder: 4 Steps To Face Everything Bravely

When thinking about problem avoidance, I cannot help but remember working on my master’s thesis a few years ago. Just thinking about the amount of work I would have to put in gave me panic attacks. So, I did what we do best – procrastinate. It’s funny how easily our mind comes up with millions of excuses when we are faced with a big challenge. For me it was always one dumb thing after another. I was always tired from work; I always had some house chore that couldn’t wait and left me feel exhausted so I had to postpone my writing; or there was an event to go to that I simply couldn’t miss. And so the months went on and I couldn’t force myself to stay on the task for more than half an hour a day. When I finally spent all of my excuses, I realized that how far behind I was with my schedule, and that I would have to work harder than ever before in order to finish everything on time. Those three weeks of not getting enough sleep, feeling tired at work, and working day and night on my thesis left me feeling stressed and anxious. But, more importantly, once I actually started working on my assignment, I realized how much I actually enjoy it. As the momentum was building up, I managed to face each challenge as it came, realizing that nothing was as difficult as I imagined it in my head.

I’m sure many of you can relate to my story to some degree. It is because our brains are simply wired to run away from problems and difficulties. Most of us are so well trained in avoiding problems, that we do it unconsciously, by default, each time we are faced with a task or a problem that seems challenging or time-consuming. It doesn’t matter if it is about working on bigger projects or doing simple tasks, such as paying bills, or taxes, our minds threat them equally if they bring any kind of discomfort. And, so our lives turn into a stressful, never-ending vicious cycle of constant struggle to finish everything on time, and we never get to the important things either. Little kids are tolerated with this kind of behavior, to some degree. But as grown-ups, if we want to constantly improve and grow as persons, we need to find ways to break free from this bad habit. One of the best approaches for dealing with problem avoidance is The Face Everything Technique that can be implemented in four simple steps:

Advertising

1. Stay in the now

Most of the time, we avoid problems without even being aware of it. By the time we realize what we are doing, the duties have already piled up, making it all the more difficult to manage. The best way to start being aware and mindful, is to start practicing being in the now. Meditation is one of the most helpful techniques for being present and clearing your mind from all the noise. Once you start practicing being in the present moment, you will become much more aware of your thoughts as they come. This way, you will be able to recognize the avoiding thoughts as they start and you would be able to stop them on time. Also, in order to become more aware, make sure to turn off all of the distractions, such as social media notifications.

Advertising

2. Make peace with the “negative”

Now that you are able to recognize your thoughts and emotions as they appear, don’t be afraid of the “negative” emotions that appear once you are faced with the object of discomfort. Try to acknowledge them instead, as it is the only way to eventually overcome them. In those moments tell yourself that it is okay to feel frightened and worried, but that is not a reason to go and distracts yourself with something more pleasant at the moment.

Advertising

3. Take action

The only way to truly overcome something is to face it head on. This is probably the most difficult step as it requires us to actually do something with the problem in hand. The great news is that it gets much easier once you complete the first two steps, and the more you practice the entire technique, the easier and more natural it gets. Another great aspect of starting an action is that it tends to pick up momentum and soon it gets much faster and easier, not to mention the self-esteem boost you will experience when you get past the initial challenges. Keep in mind the words of the great Nelson Mandela: “It always seems impossible until it’s done.”

4. Get support

It was quite a revelation for me to find out that my friends and loved ones were going through same struggles as me when it comes to running from problems and unpleasant situations. Sharing it with them made me feel less alone in my efforts to stay on the right track and face my problems. It worked both ways, as they found the same amount of support in me. Open up to your closest group of friends and family as they are probably facing it too. You can remind each other to stay focused and brave through each problem and demanding task, and help each other grow as human beings.

Advertising

More by this author

Ana Erkic

Social Media Consultant, Online Marketing Strategist, Copywriter, CEO and Co-Founder of Growato

Who Says All Introverts Hate Socializing? Here’s The Truth About Introvert And Extrovert Every Time You Drink A Beer, Remember To Drink The Same Amount Of Water You’re Exceptionally Creative If You See The Correct Image (Only 1/100 People Can Do This!) If You Have These 6 Struggles, You’re Highly Intelligent Who Can Resist Avocado! It Is One of the Most Nutrient Fruit In The World!

Trending in Communication

1 Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset 2 10 Strategies to Keep Moving Forward When You’re Feeling Extra Stuck 3 Learn the Different Types of Love (and Better Understand Your Partner) 4 Anxiety Coping Mechanisms That Work When You’re Stressed to the Max 5 How To Stop Insecure Attachment from Wreaking Havoc on Your Love Life

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising

Last Updated on November 15, 2018

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

What do you think it takes to achieve your goals? Hard work? Lots of actions? While these are paramount to becoming successful in reaching our goals, neither of these are possible without a positive mindset.

As humans, we naturally tend to lean towards a negative outlook when it comes to our hopes and dreams. We are prone to believing that we have limitations either from within ourselves or from external forces keeping us from truly getting to where we want to be in life. Our tendency to think that we’ll “believe it when we see it” suggests that our mindsets are focused on our goals not really being attainable until they’ve been achieved. The problem with this is that this common mindset fuels our limiting beliefs and shows a lack of faith in ourselves.

The Success Mindset

Success in achieving our goals comes down to a ‘success mindset’. Successful mindsets are those focused on victory, based on positive mental attitudes, empowering inclinations and good habits. Acquiring a success mindset is the sure-fire way to dramatically increase your chance to achieve your goals.

Advertising

The idea that achieving our goals comes down to our habits and actions is actually a typical type of mindset that misses a crucial point; that our mindset is, in fact, the determiner of our energy and what actions we take. A negative mindset will tend to create negative actions and similarly if we have a mindset that will only set into action once we see ‘proof’ that our goals are achievable, then the road will be much longer and arduous. This is why, instead of thinking “I’ll believe it when I see it”, a success mindset will think “I’ll see it when I believe it.”

The Placebo Effect and What It Shows Us About The Power of Mindset

The placebo effect is a perfect example of how mindset really can be powerful. In scientific trials, a group of participants were told they received medication that will heal an ailment but were actually given a sugar pill that does nothing (the placebo). Yet after the trial the participants believed it’s had a positive effect – sometimes even cured their ailment even though nothing has changed. This is the power of mindset.

How do we apply this to our goals? Well, when we set goals and dreams how often do we really believe they’ll come to fruition? Have absolute faith that they can be achieved? Have a complete unwavering expectation? Most of us don’t because we hold on to negative mindsets and limiting beliefs about ourselves that stop us from fully believing we are capable or that it’s at all possible. We tend to listen to the opinions of others despite them misaligning with our own or bow to societal pressures that make us believe we should think and act a certain way. There are many reasons why we possess these types of mindsets but a success mindset can be achieved.

Advertising

How To Create a Success Mindset

People with success mindsets have a particular way of perceiving things. They have positive outlooks and are able to put faith fully in their ability to succeed. With that in mind, here are a few ways that can turn a negative mindset into a successful one.

1. A Success Mindset Comes From a Growth Mindset

How does a mindset even manifest itself? It comes from the way you talk to yourself in the privacy of your own head. Realising this will go a long way towards noticing how you speak to yourself and others around you. If it’s mainly negative language you use when you talk about your goals and aspirations then this is an example of a fixed mindset.

A negative mindset brings with it a huge number of limiting beliefs. It creates a fixed mindset – one that can’t see beyond it’s own limitations. A growth mindset sees these limitations and looks beyond them – it finds ways to overcome obstacles and believes that this will result in success. When you think of your goal, a fixed mindset may think “what if I fail?” A growth mindset would look at the same goal and think “failures happen but that doesn’t mean I won’t be successful.”

Advertising

There’s a lot of power in changing your perspective.

2. Look For The Successes

It’s really important to get your mind focused on positive aspects of your goal. Finding inspiration through others can be really uplifting and keep you on track with developing your success mindset; reinforcing your belief that your dreams can be achieved. Find people that you can talk with about how they achieved their goals and seek out and surround yourself with positive people. This is crucial if you’re learning to develop a positive mindset.

3. Eliminate Negativity

You can come up against a lot of negativity sometimes either through other people or within yourself. Understanding that other people’s negative opinions are created through their own fears and limiting beliefs will go a long way in sustaining your success mindset. But for a lot of us, negative chatter can come from within and these usually manifest as negative words such as can’t, won’t, shouldn’t. Sometimes, when we think of how we’re going to achieve our goals, statements in our minds come out as negative absolutes: ‘It never works out for me’ or ‘I always fail.’

Advertising

When you notice these coming up you need to turn them around with ‘It always works out for me!’ and ‘I never fail!’ The trick is to believe it no matter what’s happened in the past. Remember that every new day is a clean slate and for you to adjust your mindset.

4. Create a Vision

Envisioning your end goal and seeing it in your mind is an important trait of a success mindset. Allowing ourselves to imagine our success creates a powerful excitement that shouldn’t be underestimated. When our brain becomes excited at the thought of achieving our goals, we become more committed, work harder towards achieving it and more likely to do whatever it takes to make it happen.

If this involves creating a vision board that you can look at to remind yourself every day then go for it. Small techniques like this go a long way in sustaining your success mindset and shouldn’t be dismissed.

An Inspirational Story…

For centuries experts said that running a mile in under 4 minutes was humanly impossible. On the 6th May 1954, Rodger Bannister did just that. As part of his training, Bannister relentlessly visualised the achievement, believing he could accomplish what everyone said wasn’t possible…and he did it.

What’s more amazing is that, as soon as Bannister achieved the 4-minute mile, more and more people also achieved it. How was this possible after so many years of no one achieving it? Because in people’s minds it was suddenly possible – once people knew that it was achievable it created a mindset of success and now, after over fifty years since Bannister did the ‘impossible’, his record has been lowered by 17 seconds – the power of the success mindset!

Read Next