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How to make decisions from a place of love rather than fear

How to make decisions from a place of love rather than fear

Every day we are faced with making small and large decisions. In a society of unlimited choice, decision making can sometimes leave us feeling exhausted or overwhelmed. So much so, in fact, that we often prefer to streamline the process or rely on others to make decisions for us.

Ultimately, when it comes to choosing what we want to draw in or remove from our lives we either come from a place of fear or love. Fear makes us settle for something we don’t really want, buy things we don’t really need, stay in jobs we don’t really like, and remain in disempowering relationships. In other words, we continue to live smaller than our true potential. Making decisions from love and inner-knowing on the other hand, allows us to live more deep and fulfilling lives full of abundance and joy.

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We’ve all made decisions we regret, that are not in alignment with our principles, and that were hastily made based on emotions or ego. Identifying where your decision-making is coming from at its core, is the first step towards preventing yourself from making decisions that don’t serve the highest good of all.

Here are four core ways we make decisions.

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1. Through our intuition

This is the easiest, smoothest, and most aligned way to make decisions. From this place, decisions can be made quickly and without too much logical thought or analysis. We don’t need to justify these decisions because they just feel right or we know they are right. We may hear a voice inside our heads giving us confirmation or we may have received a vision beforehand. Intuitive decisions come from the heart and a place of love, rather than from our mind or a place of fear.

To access these insights they key is to go within, rather than continue to search outside ourselves for answers. Call it your gut instinct, inner guidance system, or inner guru, making decisions from this place comes from our authentic self. When our lives our driven from our intuition, not only can’t we go wrong, but we also create flow, ease, and miracles.

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2. From a place of fear

Fear drives a lot of decisions as it’s embedded in us to keep us safe. Fear can also be found everywhere we look, in every person, and every place. Making decisions from fear makes us feel restricted, anxious, scared, and keeps us playing small in life. These decisions often stem from a place of lack and are connected to fear of the future or fears from the past. We often regret these decisions as soon as we make them and are not surprised when our predictions come true or we are left with a disappointed feeling. Although some intuitive decisions can also have some fear around them, pure fear-based decisions are made from the mind, with no heart or trust involved.

3. Through others’ influence

When we are not connected to our intuition we can be left feeling confused, overwhelmed, and easily give away our power to others. Although it can be handy to take advice and guidance from others, especially who have achieved what we want to achieve, making decisions purely based on someone else’s opinion can prove to be detrimental. It can leave us feeling regretful, fearful, or even blaming the person afterwards when things don’t go as we wanted. When it comes down to it, we are the only ones that know deep down what is best for us, no other person can give us that insight. All our answers lie within.

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4. By using logic

It can be easy to get logical and somewhat scientific about making decisions based on predictions, hypothesis, or stats. The fact is, there are so many different variables which can affect any type of outcome no matter how predictable it may seem. The power of the mind and energy is so strong that what someone is energetically doing or thinking can affect outcomes even after the action has been taken. Logical decisions also have no heart involved, so often leave you feeling flat, unenthusiastic, and wanting to hold on to control.

The key to making the right decisions that always serve our highest good and the good of all, come from being connected to our inner guidance system and intuition. Once we are aligned to this all-knowing energy, we can take action, trust and surrender. Our action becomes guided and allows us to deliver and receive what is best for us and others. We create miracles and live a life of flow and purpose.

Featured photo credit: Kristina Litvjak via unsplash.com

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Kelly Weiss

Purpose-driven business + lifestyle coach

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Last Updated on November 15, 2018

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

What do you think it takes to achieve your goals? Hard work? Lots of actions? While these are paramount to becoming successful in reaching our goals, neither of these are possible without a positive mindset.

As humans, we naturally tend to lean towards a negative outlook when it comes to our hopes and dreams. We are prone to believing that we have limitations either from within ourselves or from external forces keeping us from truly getting to where we want to be in life. Our tendency to think that we’ll “believe it when we see it” suggests that our mindsets are focused on our goals not really being attainable until they’ve been achieved. The problem with this is that this common mindset fuels our limiting beliefs and shows a lack of faith in ourselves.

The Success Mindset

Success in achieving our goals comes down to a ‘success mindset’. Successful mindsets are those focused on victory, based on positive mental attitudes, empowering inclinations and good habits. Acquiring a success mindset is the sure-fire way to dramatically increase your chance to achieve your goals.

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The idea that achieving our goals comes down to our habits and actions is actually a typical type of mindset that misses a crucial point; that our mindset is, in fact, the determiner of our energy and what actions we take. A negative mindset will tend to create negative actions and similarly if we have a mindset that will only set into action once we see ‘proof’ that our goals are achievable, then the road will be much longer and arduous. This is why, instead of thinking “I’ll believe it when I see it”, a success mindset will think “I’ll see it when I believe it.”

The Placebo Effect and What It Shows Us About The Power of Mindset

The placebo effect is a perfect example of how mindset really can be powerful. In scientific trials, a group of participants were told they received medication that will heal an ailment but were actually given a sugar pill that does nothing (the placebo). Yet after the trial the participants believed it’s had a positive effect – sometimes even cured their ailment even though nothing has changed. This is the power of mindset.

How do we apply this to our goals? Well, when we set goals and dreams how often do we really believe they’ll come to fruition? Have absolute faith that they can be achieved? Have a complete unwavering expectation? Most of us don’t because we hold on to negative mindsets and limiting beliefs about ourselves that stop us from fully believing we are capable or that it’s at all possible. We tend to listen to the opinions of others despite them misaligning with our own or bow to societal pressures that make us believe we should think and act a certain way. There are many reasons why we possess these types of mindsets but a success mindset can be achieved.

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How To Create a Success Mindset

People with success mindsets have a particular way of perceiving things. They have positive outlooks and are able to put faith fully in their ability to succeed. With that in mind, here are a few ways that can turn a negative mindset into a successful one.

1. A Success Mindset Comes From a Growth Mindset

How does a mindset even manifest itself? It comes from the way you talk to yourself in the privacy of your own head. Realising this will go a long way towards noticing how you speak to yourself and others around you. If it’s mainly negative language you use when you talk about your goals and aspirations then this is an example of a fixed mindset.

A negative mindset brings with it a huge number of limiting beliefs. It creates a fixed mindset – one that can’t see beyond it’s own limitations. A growth mindset sees these limitations and looks beyond them – it finds ways to overcome obstacles and believes that this will result in success. When you think of your goal, a fixed mindset may think “what if I fail?” A growth mindset would look at the same goal and think “failures happen but that doesn’t mean I won’t be successful.”

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There’s a lot of power in changing your perspective.

2. Look For The Successes

It’s really important to get your mind focused on positive aspects of your goal. Finding inspiration through others can be really uplifting and keep you on track with developing your success mindset; reinforcing your belief that your dreams can be achieved. Find people that you can talk with about how they achieved their goals and seek out and surround yourself with positive people. This is crucial if you’re learning to develop a positive mindset.

3. Eliminate Negativity

You can come up against a lot of negativity sometimes either through other people or within yourself. Understanding that other people’s negative opinions are created through their own fears and limiting beliefs will go a long way in sustaining your success mindset. But for a lot of us, negative chatter can come from within and these usually manifest as negative words such as can’t, won’t, shouldn’t. Sometimes, when we think of how we’re going to achieve our goals, statements in our minds come out as negative absolutes: ‘It never works out for me’ or ‘I always fail.’

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When you notice these coming up you need to turn them around with ‘It always works out for me!’ and ‘I never fail!’ The trick is to believe it no matter what’s happened in the past. Remember that every new day is a clean slate and for you to adjust your mindset.

4. Create a Vision

Envisioning your end goal and seeing it in your mind is an important trait of a success mindset. Allowing ourselves to imagine our success creates a powerful excitement that shouldn’t be underestimated. When our brain becomes excited at the thought of achieving our goals, we become more committed, work harder towards achieving it and more likely to do whatever it takes to make it happen.

If this involves creating a vision board that you can look at to remind yourself every day then go for it. Small techniques like this go a long way in sustaining your success mindset and shouldn’t be dismissed.

An Inspirational Story…

For centuries experts said that running a mile in under 4 minutes was humanly impossible. On the 6th May 1954, Rodger Bannister did just that. As part of his training, Bannister relentlessly visualised the achievement, believing he could accomplish what everyone said wasn’t possible…and he did it.

What’s more amazing is that, as soon as Bannister achieved the 4-minute mile, more and more people also achieved it. How was this possible after so many years of no one achieving it? Because in people’s minds it was suddenly possible – once people knew that it was achievable it created a mindset of success and now, after over fifty years since Bannister did the ‘impossible’, his record has been lowered by 17 seconds – the power of the success mindset!

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