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6 Things People Who Radiate Warmth And Confidence Do In Common

6 Things People Who Radiate Warmth And Confidence Do In Common

It seems like magic that some people are intoxicating to be with, but actually they have done something (either intentionally or not) to leave this good impression. Some of them are naturally charismatic; some of them had to learn how to be charismatic by integrating tips from others into their daily behavior, but it can be done with no magic involved.

They stand out from the crowd and feel good to be around. They are confident and comfortable. Follow these ten tips to see if you are a natural charmer, or what you can utilize to build up your own confidence and charisma.

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1. They Tell Their Story

Charismatic people have a way of conversing with others that is much more engaging than just small talk. Now I’m not talking about the guy or gal who talk about themselves all day long. These folks are not only cold and vain, but they lack the confidence it takes to be a charmer. Charismatic people share stories about themselves and their lives, but in a way that connect with others; stories that others can relate to. This opens the floor for genuine conversation.

2. They Are Good Listeners

It’s one thing to tell good stories, but it’s another to be a good listener when others are telling their stories as well. They allow others to take the floor and lend a listening ear. They truly engage by making eye contact. They smile. They nod in agreement. They don’t interrupt or over-talk. Their focus is on others too; not just themselves.

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3. They Leave Their Ego at The Door

Charmers aren’t vain. They are open-minded to other people’s thoughts and opinions. They listen without passing judgment. They share without arguing to be right. They stand firm on their beliefs, but value other’s beliefs as well. You don’t have to always agree, but you do have to show a mutual respect.

4. They Ask Questions

They are good storytellers. They are good listeners. But they also take the time to learn about others by asking questions. We all like to talk about ourselves to some extent, but knowing when to pass the microphone so to speak, makes for a more inviting conversation. There won’t be any awkward or uncomfortable silence because there is always a lot we can learn from and about each other by simply asking.

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5. Be Personal

Now I’m not suggesting that charisma is about spewing off your whole life story or your deepest darkest secrets to the first person you meet, but I am suggesting that some intimate depth to conversation is always welcomed. Nobody wants to feel that you are a phony person and being fake in expressing yourself. We all have crazy family stories, embarrassing moments, and first date horrors to share. People will appreciate seeing the “real” you.

6. They Walk The Walk

Charming a room all starts with the way you walk into the room. You won’t get noticed by looking at the floor and tucking yourself away in the nearest corner. Look confident, whether you really feel it or not. Confidence can be found by walking tall, head up. Keep your body light and loose, not rigid and unapproachable.

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We all have the warmth and confidence somewhere within ourselves, and we can all learn how to be charismatic. Utilizing these common tips will help to bring out the best in ourselves, which will then bring out the best in others around us!

Featured photo credit: Martin Dimitrov via gettyimages.co.uk

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Last Updated on March 5, 2021

Science Says People Who Talk To Themselves Are Geniuses

Science Says People Who Talk To Themselves Are Geniuses

I talk a lot to myself. It helps me to keep my concentration on the activity on hand, makes me focus more on my studies, and gives me some pretty brilliant ideas while chattering to myself; more importantly, I produce better works. For example, right now, as I am typing, I am constantly mumbling to myself. Do you talk to yourself? Don’t get embarrassed admitting it because science has discovered that those who talk to themselves are actually geniuses… and not crazy!

Research Background

Psychologist-researcher Gary Lupyan conducted an experiment where 20 volunteers were shown objects, in a supermarket, and were asked to remember them. Half of them were told to repeat the objects, for example, banana, and the other half remained silent. In the end, the result shown that self-directed speech aided people to find the objects faster, by 50 to 100 milliseconds, compared to the silent ones.

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“I’ll often mutter to myself when searching for something in the refrigerator or the supermarket shelves,” said Gary Lupyan.

This personal experience actually made him conduct this experiment. Lupyan, together with another psychologist, Daniel Swigley, came up with the outcomes that those to talk to oneself are geniuses. Here are the reasons:

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It stimulates your memory

When you are talking to yourself, your sensory mechanism gets activated. It gets easier on your memory since you can visualize the word, and you can act accordingly.[1]

It helps stay focused

When you are saying it loud, you stay focused on your task,[2] and it helps you recognise that stuff immediately. Of course, this only helps if you know what the object you are searching looks like. For example, a banana is yellow in colour, and you know how a banana looks like. So when you are saying it loud, your brain immediately pictures the image on your mind. But if you don’t know what banana looks like, then there is no effect of saying it loud.

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It helps you clarify your thoughts

Every one of us tends to have various types of thoughts. Most make sense, while the others don’t. Suppose you are furious at someone and you feel like killing that person. Now for this issue you won’t run to a therapist, will you? No, what you do is lock yourself in a room and mutter to yourself. You are letting go off the anger by talking to yourself, the pros and cons of killing that person, and eventually you calm down. This is a silly thought that you have and are unable to share it with any other person. Psychologist Linda Sapadin said,[3]

“It helps you clarify your thoughts, tend to what’s important and firm up any decisions you are contemplating.”

Featured photo credit: Girl Using Laptop In Hotel Room/Ed Gregory via stokpic.com

Reference

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