It seems like magic that some people are intoxicating to be with, but actually they have done something (either intentionally or not) to leave this good impression. Some of them are naturally charismatic; some of them had to learn how to be charismatic by integrating tips from others into their daily behavior, but it can be done with no magic involved.
They stand out from the crowd and feel good to be around. They are confident and comfortable. Follow these ten tips to see if you are a natural charmer, or what you can utilize to build up your own confidence and charisma.
1. They Tell Their Story
Charismatic people have a way of conversing with others that is much more engaging than just small talk. Now I’m not talking about the guy or gal who talk about themselves all day long. These folks are not only cold and vain, but they lack the confidence it takes to be a charmer. Charismatic people share stories about themselves and their lives, but in a way that connect with others; stories that others can relate to. This opens the floor for genuine conversation.
2. They Are Good Listeners
It’s one thing to tell good stories, but it’s another to be a good listener when others are telling their stories as well. They allow others to take the floor and lend a listening ear. They truly engage by making eye contact. They smile. They nod in agreement. They don’t interrupt or over-talk. Their focus is on others too; not just themselves.
3. They Leave Their Ego at The Door
Charmers aren’t vain. They are open-minded to other people’s thoughts and opinions. They listen without passing judgment. They share without arguing to be right. They stand firm on their beliefs, but value other’s beliefs as well. You don’t have to always agree, but you do have to show a mutual respect.
4. They Ask Questions
They are good storytellers. They are good listeners. But they also take the time to learn about others by asking questions. We all like to talk about ourselves to some extent, but knowing when to pass the microphone so to speak, makes for a more inviting conversation. There won’t be any awkward or uncomfortable silence because there is always a lot we can learn from and about each other by simply asking.
5. Be Personal
Now I’m not suggesting that charisma is about spewing off your whole life story or your deepest darkest secrets to the first person you meet, but I am suggesting that some intimate depth to conversation is always welcomed. Nobody wants to feel that you are a phony person and being fake in expressing yourself. We all have crazy family stories, embarrassing moments, and first date horrors to share. People will appreciate seeing the “real” you.
6. They Walk The Walk
Charming a room all starts with the way you walk into the room. You won’t get noticed by looking at the floor and tucking yourself away in the nearest corner. Look confident, whether you really feel it or not. Confidence can be found by walking tall, head up. Keep your body light and loose, not rigid and unapproachable.
We all have the warmth and confidence somewhere within ourselves, and we can all learn how to be charismatic. Utilizing these common tips will help to bring out the best in ourselves, which will then bring out the best in others around us!
Featured photo credit: Martin Dimitrov via gettyimages.co.uk