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Learn This One Easy Trick To Show That You Are A Good Listener

Learn This One Easy Trick To Show That You Are A Good Listener

Most people think that they are good listeners, but sadly this isn’t always the case. Lots of people find themselves thinking about other things when someone is talking to them, or they are just waiting for their chance to speak.

If you can relate to this, you should try to work on your listening skills. Being a bad listener makes life harder, as listening helps us to understand others and empathize. It also helps you to increase your interactions with the outside world so that you can improve your communication skills and build meaningful relationships.

Thankfully you only need to learn one thing to become a good listener.

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The Problems That Stand In The Way Of Being A Good Listener

There are lots of things that make people bad listeners, but one of the main issues is impatience. Impatient people struggle to be good listeners, as they are not fully involved in what the other person is saying. Instead of listening to their friend, they are just waiting for their chance to talk. As soon as there is a pause in the conversation they will interrupt their friend or cut them off.

Another problem is getting distracted easily. When someone starts talking, the other person is fully focused, but after a few minutes they are no longer listening because they are focused on something else, such as a text message or a bird flying past.

Another issue is tiredness. Some people are normally good listeners, but they become bad listeners in the evening when they are too tired to focus on what the other person is saying.

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Can you relate to any of these listening problems? Many people think that they are good listeners, but in reality they think too highly of themselves. If you want to know if you are a good listener, ask your partner or your best friend or your housemate and see what they say. This will give you an honest answer, and it may also help you to work out the cause of your listening problems.

How To Become A Good Listener

The one thing that you need to do to become a good listener is to repeat other people’s words. If you are hanging out with your friend and they say, “I don’t like my next door neighbor’s cat because it is always scratching my door,” you could say “The cat scratches your door? – Does it do that every day?” When you repeat what the other person is saying, you show them that you are listening properly and that you care about the conversation.

The main reason why this works so well is because it is active listening rather than passive listening. Instead of being a silent member of the conversation, you are actively taking part in the discussion and trying to understand the other person.

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What You Need To Do Now

It is easy to implement this listening trick into your daily life. Simply make sure to repeat some of the most relevant things that the other person is saying. You can also add an element of support and validation when you repeat the other person. For instance if someone said, “I was told off at work for someone else’s mistake and it was really frustrating,” you could say “You were frustrated that you were told off, I can understand that. I imagine I would feel the same way!”

While this listening trick is very effective, it is important to moderate how often you repeat other people. You want to seem like a supportive, good listener, not an annoying person who repeats everything!

It can also be useful to summarize when someone has finished telling you a story. This will reassure them that you understood what they said, and it also gives you the chance to clarify what you have heard.

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Featured photo credit: Unsplash via pexels.com

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Amy Johnson

Freelance writer, editor and social media manager.

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Last Updated on September 20, 2018

7 Powerful Questions To Find Out What You Want To Do With Your Life

7 Powerful Questions To Find Out What You Want To Do With Your Life

What do I want to do with my life? It’s a question all of us think about at one point or another.

For some, the answer comes easily. For others, it takes a lifetime to figure out.

It’s easy to just go through the motions and continue to do what’s comfortable and familiar. But for those of you who seek fulfillment, who want to do more, these questions will help you paint a clearer picture of what you want to do with your life.

1. What are the things I’m most passionate about?

The first step to living a more fulfilling life is to think about the things that you’re passionate about.

What do you love? What fulfills you? What “work” do you do that doesn’t feel like work? Maybe you enjoy writing, maybe you love working with animals or maybe you have a knack for photography.

The point is, figure out what you love doing, then do more of it.

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2. What are my greatest accomplishments in life so far?

Think about your past experiences and the things in your life you’re most proud of.

How did those accomplishments make you feel? Pretty darn good, right? So why not try and emulate those experiences and feelings?

If you ran a marathon once and loved the feeling you had afterwards, start training for another one. If your child grew up to be a star athlete or musician because of your teachings, then be a coach or mentor for other kids.

Continue to do the things that have been most fulfilling for you.

3. If my life had absolutely no limits, what would I choose to have and what would I choose to do?

Here’s a cool exercise: Think about what you would do if you had no limits.

If you had all the money and time in the world, where would you go? What would you do? Who would you spend time with?

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These answers can help you figure out what you want to do with your life. It doesn’t mean you need millions of dollars to be happy though.

What it does mean is answering these questions will help you set goals to reach certain milestones and create a path toward happiness and fulfillment. Which leads to our next question …

4. What are my goals in life?

Goals are a necessary component to set you up for a happy future. So answer these questions:

Once you figure out the answers to each of these, you’ll have a much better idea of what you should do with your life.

5. Whom do I admire most in the world?

Following the path of successful people can set you up for success.

Think about the people you respect and admire most. What are their best qualities? Why do you respect them? What can you learn from them?

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You’re the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with.[1] So don’t waste your time with people who hold you back from achieving your dreams.

Spend more time with happy, successful, optimistic people and you’ll become one of them.

6. What do I not like to do?

An important part of figuring out what you want to do with your life is honestly assessing what you don’t want to do.

What are the things you despise? What bugs you the most about your current job?

Maybe you hate meetings even though you sit through 6 hours of them every day. If that’s the case, find a job where you can work more independently.

The point is, if you want something to change in your life, you need to take action. Which leads to our final question …

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7. How hard am I willing to work to get what I want?

Great accomplishments never come easy. If you want to do great things with your life, you’re going to have to make a great effort. That will probably mean putting in more hours the average person, getting outside your comfort zone and learning as much as you can to achieve as much as you can.

But here’s the cool part: it’s often the journey that is the most fulfilling part. It’s during these seemingly small, insignificant moments that you’ll often find that “aha” moments that helps you answer the question,

“What do I want to do with my life?”

So take the first step toward improving your life. You won’t regret it.

Featured photo credit: Andrew Ly via unsplash.com

Reference

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