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Why Highly Sensitive People Can Draw People To Them Like A Magnet

Why Highly Sensitive People Can Draw People To Them Like A Magnet

There are many advantages of being highly sensitive but one true advantage is the ability to draw people to you and allow them to feel a level of connection with you that they can’t get with other people.

People are able to disclose their true selves to a highly sensitive person and establish solid relationships with them while appreciating their traits and ability to truly be a good friend. With that in mind, here are 6 reasons why highly sensitive people can draw people to them like a magnet:

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1. They Are Sensitive To Others’ Emotions

Highly sensitive people are extremely empathetic with the ability to sense emotions in others and act accordingly. They will often notice other people’s emotions before anyone else does and will want to comfort them in some way. This makes highly sensitive people good to have near when you’re not feeling so good or even to share in your good news. Their ability to put themselves in other people’s shoes means they are highly engaged in conversations and show it well. This makes others love talking to them and feel safe in telling them their thoughts and secrets.

2. They Are Able To See Things From A Different Perspective

With the ability to be deep thinkers, chances are highly sensitive people have thought about a lot of things from different angles. This makes them great people to be able to see things from a different perspective from their own without judgement. Whether this is supporting your own perspective or being able to present another angle to your thinking, conversations with highly sensitive people can be a good way to solve problems in a special, empathetic and thought-provoking way.

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3. They Persevere

We have people in our lives who help us out greatly but once the problem is over, so is the support. Highly sensitive people are more likely to follow up with you and check in with the past problem to make sure nothing is still worrying or bothering you. This thoughtfulness can provide much needed aftercare that many others forget or don’t think to do. This kind of support draws someone more to a highly sensitive person because they go above and beyond when it might not be obvious to do so.

4. Highly Sensitive People Are Conscientious

Highly sensitive people are unlikely to take any actions that would cause harm or distress to anyone. Since they can be easily distressed, their empathetic tendencies come into play once again and the last thing they would want to do is project those feelings onto anyone else. They are also able to think before they speak and carefully and thoughtfully analyse each situation before acting. Thinking ahead and to the consequences and possible outcome of each problem and situation means they never say or do anything to offend people. This always holds them in high esteem by others and allows people to naturally cherish their friendships.

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5. They Don’t Shy Away From Pain

If you find yourself in a painful and emotional situation, many people aren’t able to know what to say or avoid emotional distress altogether but highly sensitive people identify with their own pain on a regular basis and have the experience of how to deal with it. This makes them great people to have as a support network and you know you can easily approach them with difficult life scenarios knowing you won’t be faced with judgement or have them run a mile. Highly sensitive people are experts in this field and offer that perfect shoulder to cry on in your time of need.

6. They Will Cherish You As a Friend

Highly sensitive people don’t take friendships lightly. People who they feel are taking advantage of them or hurt them one time too many, can be cut off quite swiftly. Highly sensitive people cherish the good people in their lives and will do all they can to be a great and supportive friend. In other words, they experience gratitude and appreciation for those who they feel are an asset to their life and this can show in their actions and words, attracting people to them all the more.

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Many highly sensitive people are quite introverted making them seemingly quiet to begin with but they will always be the ones with quality relationships because they have the ability to attract long-lasting friendships worth cultivating with investment and effort.

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Jenny Marchal

A passionate writer who loves sharing about positive psychology.

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Last Updated on August 4, 2020

The Gentle Art of Saying No For a Less Stressful Life

The Gentle Art of Saying No For a Less Stressful Life

No!

It’s a simple fact that you can never be productive if you take on too many commitments — you simply spread yourself too thin and will not be able to get anything done, at least not well or on time.

But requests for your time are coming in all the time — through phone, email, IM or in person. To stay productive, and minimize stress, you have to learn the Gentle Art of Saying No — an art that many people have problems with.

What’s so hard about saying no? Well, to start with, it can hurt, anger or disappoint the person you’re saying “no” to, and that’s not usually a fun task. Second, if you hope to work with that person in the future, you’ll want to continue to have a good relationship with that person, and saying “no” in the wrong way can jeopardize that.

But it doesn’t have to be difficult or hard on your relationship. Here’s how to master the Gentle Art of Saying No:

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1. Value Your Time

Know your commitments, and how valuable your precious time is. Then, when someone asks you to dedicate some of your time to a new commitment, you’ll know that you simply cannot do it. And tell them that: “I just can’t right now … my plate is overloaded as it is.”

2. Know Your Priorities

Even if you do have some extra time (which for many of us is rare), is this new commitment really the way you want to spend that time?

For myself, I know that more commitments means less time with my wife and kids, who are more important to me than anything.

3. Practice Saying No

Practice makes perfect. Saying “no” as often as you can is a great way to get better at it and more comfortable with saying the word. And sometimes, repeating the word is the only way to get a message through to extremely persistent people. When they keep insisting, just keep saying no. Eventually, they’ll get the message.

4. Don’t Apologize

A common way to start out is “I’m sorry but …” as people think that it sounds more polite. While politeness is important, apologizing just makes it sound weaker. You need to be firm, and unapologetic about guarding your time.

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5. Stop Being Nice

Again, it’s important to be polite, but being nice by saying yes all the time only hurts you. When you make it easy for people to grab your time (or money), they will continue to do it. But if you erect a wall, they will look for easier targets.

Show them that your time is well guarded by being firm and turning down as many requests (that are not on your top priority list) as possible.

6. Say No to Your Boss

Sometimes we feel that we have to say yes to our boss — they’re our boss, right? And if we say “no,” then we look like we can’t handle the work — at least, that’s the common reasoning.

But in fact, it’s the opposite — explain to your boss that by taking on too many commitments, you are weakening your productivity and jeopardizing your existing commitments. If your boss insists that you take on the project, go over your project or task list and ask him/her to re-prioritize, explaining that there’s only so much you can take on at one time.

7. Pre-Empting

It’s often much easier to pre-empt requests than to say “no” to them after the request has been made. If you know that requests are likely to be made, perhaps in a meeting, just say to everyone as soon as you come into the meeting,

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“Look guys, just to let you know, my week is booked full with some urgent projects and I won’t be able to take on any new requests.”

8. Get Back to You

Instead of providing an answer then and there, it’s often better to tell the person you’ll give their request some thought and get back to them. This will allow you to give it some consideration, and check your commitments and priorities. Then, if you can’t take on the request, simply tell them:

“After giving this some thought, and checking my commitments, I won’t be able to accommodate the request at this time.”

At least you gave it some consideration.

9. Maybe Later

If this is an option that you’d like to keep open, instead of just shutting the door on the person, it’s often better to just say,

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“This sounds like an interesting opportunity, but I just don’t have the time at the moment. Perhaps you could check back with me in [give a time frame].”

Next time, when they check back with you, you might have some free time on your hands.

10. It’s Not You, It’s Me

This classic dating rejection can work in other situations. Don’t be insincere about it, though. Often, the person or project is a good one, but it’s just not right for you, at least not at this time.

Simply say so — you can compliment the idea, the project, the person, the organization … but say that it’s not the right fit, or it’s not what you’re looking for at this time. Only say this if it’s true — people can sense insincerity.

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Featured photo credit: Kyle Glenn via unsplash.com

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