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5 Tips for Making the Move Across Town

5 Tips for Making the Move Across Town

Summer is upon us and that means moving season has started. Many individuals take advantage of the summer when making the move to another apartment or house. While there are many details that go into packing up your belongings and relocating, even when it is just across town, it doesn’t have to be stressful. Take a few minutes prior to the move to plan your steps and ensure success!

No matter what your plan is or how many belongings you are moving, here are some tips to keep in mind to ensure your relocation is a success.

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1. Separate the times before moving into your new space and out of your old space.

If you are able to get the keys to your new house or apartment prior to the time you need to be out of your old apartment, try to secure this. Having a few extra days where you can make trips back and forth between the two spaces will take some of the pressure off the move. This will also allow you to set up your space before moving big-ticket items such as a bed or couch in to your new apartment or home.

2. Purge any items that you have not used in over a year.

This includes clothing, accessories, dishes, and house décor. Purging items that are not needed will save time during the packing and moving process. Chances are, when you move into your new establishment you will want to organize everything and get it set up, and what is the point of doing this with items you no longer need or use? Taking care of cleaning beforehand will save you both time and energy. Share these items with family, friends, or local organizations that accept donations.

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3. Condense items in their current packaging.

For example, if you have your shoes hanging in a shoe rack, roll up the rack and take this on the go instead of emptying all of your shoes from the rack, packing them, and then reorganizing them when arriving at your new establishment. The same rule applies to items such as clothing. Keep all of your clothing on hangers or in dresser drawers and place bags over them for the moving process. This will ensure that your clothing stays clean. When arriving at your new house or apartment, simply unpack the items and put them in their proper place. This rule can also be applied to jewelry boxes and other organizers containing accessories.

4. Call the professionals!

Moving large items such as beds and couches can be time consuming and physically demanding. In addition to this, it can also be difficult to secure the help of family and friends when making a move. Consider contacting a moving company to help make the movie easier. They will be able to help you situate your belongings in your new house and will ensure that all of your belongings arrive safe and sound.

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5. Pay attention to the rules of your new neighborhood.

When moving somewhere new, even if it is just across town, chances are that some of the rules will have changed. For example, there may be new parking regulations for street parking or an assigned parking lot for your complex. In addition to this, there may be other changes to your living arrangements such the assigned days to put your trash and recycling out. Checking with your landlord about any potential changes to be aware of will help to ease the transition.

Congratulations on finishing your move. Now it is time to unpack and organize all of your belongings and set up your new home!

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Featured photo credit: Photo by: Ed Gregory via stokpic.com

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Last Updated on July 10, 2020

How to Take Control of Your Life with Better Boundaries

How to Take Control of Your Life with Better Boundaries

We all have them—those hurtful, frustrating, offensive, manipulative people in our lives. No matter how hard we try to surround ourselves with positive and kind people, there will always be those who will disrespect, insult, berate, and misuse you if we allow them to.

We may, for a variety of reasons, not be able to avoid them, but we can determine how we interact with them and how we allow them to interact with us.

So, how to take control of your life and stop being pushed around?

Learning to set clear firm boundaries with the people in our lives at work and in our personal lives is the best way to protect ourselves from the negative effects of this kind of behavior.

What Boundaries Are (And What They’re Not)

Boundaries are limits

—they are not threats or ultimatums. Boundaries inform or teach. They are not a form of punishment.

Boundaries are firm lines—determined by you—which cannot be crossed by those around you. They are guidelines for how you will allow others to treat you and what kind of behaviors you will expect.

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Healthy personal boundaries help protect you from physical or emotional pain. You may also need to set firm boundaries at work to ensure you and your time are not disrespected. Don’t allow others to take advantage of your kindness and generosity.

Clear boundaries communicate to others that you demand respect and consideration—that you are willing to stand up for yourself and that you will not be a doormat for anyone. They are a “no trespassing” sign that makes it very clear when a line has been crossed and that there will be consequences for doing so.

Boundaries are not set with the intention of changing other people. They may change how people interact with you, but they are more about enforcing your needs than attempting to change the general behavior and attitude of others.

How to Establish Boundaries and Take Control of Your Life

Here are some ways that you can establish boundaries and take control of your life.

1. Self-Awareness Comes First

Before you can establish boundaries with others, you first need to understand what your needs are.

You are entitled to respect. You have the right to protect yourself from inappropriate or offensive behavior. Setting boundaries is a way of honoring your needs.

To set appropriate boundaries, you need to be clear about what healthy behaviors look like—what healthy relationships look like.

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You first have to become more aware of your feelings and honest with yourself about your expectations and what you feel is appropriate behavior:

  • Where do you need to establish better boundaries?
  • When do you feel disrespected?
  • When do you feel violated, frustrated, or angered by the behavior of others?
  • In what situations do you feel you are being mistreated or taken advantage of?
  • When do you want to be alone?
  • How much space do you need?

You need to honor your own needs and boundaries before you can expect others to honor them. This allows you to take control of your life.

2. Clear Communication Is Essential

Inform others clearly and directly what your expectations are. It is essential to have clear communication if you want others to respect your boundaries. Explain in an honest and respectful tone what you find offensive or unacceptable.

Many people simply aren’t aware that they are behaving inappropriately. They may never have been taught proper manners or consideration for others.

3. Be Specific but Don’t Blame

Taking a blaming or punishing attitude automatically puts people on the defensive. People will not listen when they feel attacked. It’s part of human nature.

That said, you do not need to overexplain or defend yourself. Boundaries are not open to compromise.

Sample language:

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  • “You may not…yell or raise your voice to me…”
  • “I need…to be treated with respect…”
  • “It’s not okay when…you take things from my desk without asking…”
  • “I won’t…do your work…cover for you anymore…”
  • “It’s not acceptable when…you ridicule or insult me…”
  • “I am uncomfortable when…you use offensive language”
  • “I will no longer be able to…lend you money…”

Being able to communicate these without sounding accusatory is essential if you want others to respect your boundaries so you can take control of your life.

4. Consequences Are Often Necessary

Determine what the appropriate consequences will be when boundaries are crossed. If it’s appropriate, be clear about those consequences upfront when communicating those boundaries to others.

Follow through. People won’t respect your boundaries if you don’t enforce them.

Standing our ground and forcing consequences doesn’t come easily to us. We want to be nice. We want people to like us, but we shouldn’t have to trade our self-respect to gain friends or to achieve success.

We may be tempted to let minor disrespect slide to avoid conflict, but as the familiar saying goes, “if you give people an inch, they’ll take a mile.”

It’s much easier to address offensive or inappropriate behavior now than to wait until that behavior has gotten completely out of hand.

It’s also important to remember that positive reinforcement is even more powerful than negative consequences. When people do alter the way they treat you, acknowledge it. Let people know that you notice and appreciate their efforts.

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Final Thoughts

Respect is always a valid reason for setting a boundary. Don’t defend yourself or your needs. Boundaries are often necessary to protect your time, your space, and your feelings. And these are essential if you want to take control of your life.

Start with the easiest boundaries first. Setting boundaries is a skill that needs to be practiced. Enlist support from others if necessary. Inform people immediately when they have crossed the line.

Don’t wait. Communicate politely and directly. Be clear about the consequences and follow them through.

The better you become at setting your own boundaries, the better you become at recognizing and respecting the boundaries of others.

Remember that establishing boundaries is your right. You are entitled to respect. You can’t control how other people behave, but you do have control over the way you allow people to treat you.

Learning to set boundaries is not always easy, but with time, it will become more comfortable. You may eventually find that boundaries become automatic and you no longer need to consciously set them.

They will simply become a natural extension of your self-respect.

Featured photo credit: Thomas Kelley via unsplash.com

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