Advertising
Advertising

50 Small Things That Make Relationships Last

50 Small Things That Make Relationships Last

It is up to you to find importance and relevance in the small things that could bring out the best in your relationship.

Here are 50 small things that relationships need to last.

Advertising

  1. Travel and discover new places together.
  2. Forgive immediately.
  3. Forget and don’t keep a score.
  4. Communicate and listen more.
  5. Pursue your individual passions.
  6. Set goals as a couple.
  7. Pursue goals together.
  8. Learn to say “thank you” to the other person.
  9. Celebrate your victories together.
  10. Manage your losses together.
  11. Always be grateful for the other person in your life.
  12. Surprise the other person with a thoughtful action.
  13. Grow together.
  14. Adjust and tolerate your partner.
  15. Be supportive of your partner’s goals.
  16. Respect your partner’s space and time.
  17. Compliment your partner for their effort.
  18. Don’t hesitate to speak your mind.
  19. Always focus on the best in your partner.
  20. Be accountable and responsible for your emotions.
  21. Be open and willing to share everything. Fully open your heart and let your partner in.
  22. Be present. Be willing to give your partner your attention, your time, your soul, and your focus.
  23. Be silly sometimes. Don’t take everything so seriously.
  24. Respect each other’s friends and family.
  25. Look good and attractive for your mate.
  26. Respect each other’s privacy.
  27. Be responsible with money. Money has a vital role to play in your union.
  28. Be a lady (or a gentleman). Simple things like throwing out the thrash or getting the groceries sustains the relationship and shows that you care.
  29. Never give up on your relationship. Expect everything will turn out well.
  30. Mind your manners and be courteous.
  31. Adapt and be self-sufficient. Don’t ask for everything from your mate. Learn to handle yourself and deal with some of your domestics.
  32. Appreciate their family and friends. There is no harm in having them over every now and then.
  33. Be decent. Maintain good hygiene and dress properly.
  34. Be affectionate. Hold their hands, kiss them, and show that you really care about them.
  35. Be romantic. Be creative on ways to spice up your relationship. Plan a special night with your partner. Do something remarkable for them.
  36. Never forget their birthdays, anniversaries, or special moments. Relive those wonderful times with them.
  37. Admit that you are wrong. You won’t always be right. Throw away your pride and be willing to tolerate the other person – no matter what.
  38. Be a problem solver rather than being overly critical.
  39. Focus on improving yourself and becoming a better person for the your partner. Never stop giving your best in the relationship.
  40. Be a team player. It is not about your singular effort, but rather what you can achieve together as a team.
  41. Don’t be lazy in your love. There is no need to be adamant about how you feel. Always work on improving your love for the other person.
  42. It is your duty to be a partner and to love the other person for who they are. You cannot change them. All you can do is adore their strong qualities and be aware of their flaws.
  43. Be accountable for how you feel. Your partner is not a toy or a thing that is meant to make you happy. Instead, learn to treasure how you feel for them, regardless of what happens.
  44. Never play the blame-game. Instead, find ways to heal your pain and your partner’s also.
  45. Be informed. Know what makes the other person feel validated and loved.
  46. Be vulnerable. You may not want to show it, but your partner is there for you to admit your feelings, worries, and fears to them.
  47. Crack a joke and be willing to laugh at their jokes.
  48. Don’t be cheap. Go the extra mile and show how much you value the other person in your life.
  49. Be aware of their needs and wants.
  50. Listen, and know when silence plays a better role than speaking out.

Featured photo credit: http://www.pixabay.com via pixabay.com

Advertising

Advertising

More by this author

Casey Imafidon

Specialized in motivation and personal growth, providing advice to make readers fulfilled and spurred on to achieve all that they desire in life.

6 Things To Do Every Day To Ensure You Stick To Your Goals How to Form Your Success Formula to Get Unstuck in Life 10 Habits Of People Who Are Highly Successful At Work 8 Reasons Risk Takers Are More Likely To Be Successful 15 Signs Of Self-Absorbed People

Trending in Communication

1 40 Acts of Kindness to Make the World a Better Place 2 6 Reasons Why You Should Think Before You Speak 3 How to Train Your Brain to Be Optimistic 4 How to Stop Living on Autopilot with Antonio Neves 5 The Gentle Art of Saying No For a Less Stressful Life

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising
Advertising

Last Updated on August 6, 2020

6 Reasons Why You Should Think Before You Speak

6 Reasons Why You Should Think Before You Speak

We’ve all done it. That moment when a series of words slithers from your mouth and the instant regret manifests through blushing and profuse apologies. If you could just think before you speak! It doesn’t have to be like this, and with a bit of practice, it’s actually quite easy to prevent.

“Think twice before you speak, because your words and influence will plant the seed of either success or failure in the mind of another.” – Napolean Hill

Are we speaking the same language?

My mum recently left me a note thanking me for looking after her dog. She’d signed it with “LOL.” In my world, this means “laugh out loud,” and in her world it means “lots of love.” My kids tell me things are “sick” when they’re good, and ”manck” when they’re bad (when I say “bad,” I don’t mean good!). It’s amazing that we manage to communicate at all.

When speaking, we tend to color our language with words and phrases that have become personal to us, things we’ve picked up from our friends, families and even memes from the internet. These colloquialisms become normal, and we expect the listener (or reader) to understand “what we mean.” If you really want the listener to understand your meaning, try to use words and phrases that they might use.

Am I being lazy?

When you’ve been in a relationship for a while, a strange metamorphosis takes place. People tend to become lazier in the way that they communicate with each other, with less thought for the feelings of their partner. There’s no malice intended; we just reach a “comfort zone” and know that our partners “know what we mean.”

Advertising

Here’s an exchange from Psychology Today to demonstrate what I mean:

Early in the relationship:

“Honey, I don’t want you to take this wrong, but I’m noticing that your hair is getting a little thin on top. I know guys are sensitive about losing their hair, but I don’t want someone else to embarrass you without your expecting it.”

When the relationship is established:

“Did you know that you’re losing a lot of hair on the back of your head? You’re combing it funny and it doesn’t help. Wear a baseball cap or something if you feel weird about it. Lots of guys get thin on top. It’s no big deal.”

It’s pretty clear which of these statements is more empathetic and more likely to be received well. Recognizing when we do this can be tricky, but with a little practice it becomes easy.

Have I actually got anything to say?

When I was a kid, my gran used to say to me that if I didn’t have anything good to say, I shouldn’t say anything at all. My gran couldn’t stand gossip, so this makes total sense, but you can take this statement a little further and modify it: “If you don’t have anything to say, then don’t say anything at all.”

A lot of the time, people speak to fill “uncomfortable silences,” or because they believe that saying something, anything, is better than staying quiet. It can even be a cause of anxiety for some people.

When somebody else is speaking, listen. Don’t wait to speak. Listen. Actually hear what that person is saying, think about it, and respond if necessary.

Am I painting an accurate picture?

One of the most common forms of miscommunication is the lack of a “referential index,” a type of generalization that fails to refer to specific nouns. As an example, look at these two simple phrases: “Can you pass me that?” and “Pass me that thing over there!”. How often have you said something similar?

Advertising

How is the listener supposed to know what you mean? The person that you’re talking to will start to fill in the gaps with something that may very well be completely different to what you mean. You’re thinking “pass me the salt,” but you get passed the pepper. This can be infuriating for the listener, and more importantly, can create a lack of understanding and ultimately produce conflict.

Before you speak, try to label people, places and objects in a way that it is easy for any listeners to understand.

What words am I using?

It’s well known that our use of nouns and verbs (or lack of them) gives an insight into where we grew up, our education, our thoughts and our feelings.

Less well known is that the use of pronouns offers a critical insight into how we emotionally code our sentences. James Pennebaker’s research in the 1990’s concluded that function words are important keys to someone’s psychological state and reveal much more than content words do.

Starting a sentence with “I think…” demonstrates self-focus rather than empathy with the speaker, whereas asking the speaker to elaborate or quantify what they’re saying clearly shows that you’re listening and have respect even if you disagree.

Advertising

Is the map really the territory?

Before speaking, we sometimes construct a scenario that makes us act in a way that isn’t necessarily reflective of the actual situation.

A while ago, John promised to help me out in a big way with a project that I was working on. After an initial meeting and some big promises, we put together a plan and set off on its execution. A week or so went by, and I tried to get a hold of John to see how things were going. After voice mails and emails with no reply and general silence, I tried again a week later and still got no response.

I was frustrated and started to get more than a bit vexed. The project obviously meant more to me than it did to him, and I started to construct all manner of crazy scenarios. I finally got through to John and immediately started a mild rant about making promises you can’t keep. He stopped me in my tracks with the news that his brother had died. If I’d have just thought before I spoke…

Read Next