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This Is Why Some People Make Deeper Connections With Others

This Is Why Some People Make Deeper Connections With Others

Throughout your life, you’ve undoubtedly met a handful of people with whom you feel an unending, genuine attachment to. Some people are just able to connect on an entirely different level with their fellow man. But it’s all in the way they act each and every day of their lives. If you’ve ever found yourself attracted to someone on a much deeper level, it’s likely because:

They treat everyone with respect

When I say “everyone,” I mean that. Those who are emotionally inviting never look down on anybody, and are always willing to lend a helping hand to those in need. They give everyone “the time of day” regardless of how busy they are. Because they are so eager to give respect to everyone they come into contact with, they end up receiving it back wherever they go.

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They follow the “Platinum Rule”

You’ve likely heard of the Golden Rule, which states that you should treat others as you’d like to be treated. Those who seek a deeper connection with those around them follow the Platinum Rule: Treat others as they want to be treated. While the Golden Rule is a good start, it insinuates that everyone likes to be treated the same way you do. Living by the Platinum Rule allows you to empathize with your fellow man and see the world from their perspective. By doing so, you form a much deeper connection with them.

They have unique, personable interactions

You won’t catch this type of person asking “How about this weather?” Those who seek deeper connections do so at all times. If they strike up a conversation with someone while waiting for a bus, they’ll likely probe into that person’s interests, asking questions that show their genuine interest in what their new friend has to say. They don’t use communication as a way to pass time; they use it as a way to truly experience life.

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They have integrity

Like I mentioned in the last point, those who connect well with others are genuinely interested in other people. While some people might make polite conversation only to turn around and roll their eyes, these people actually want to be involved in communication and connection. They never feel “stuck” in a conversation. They’re not simply polite for the sake of being polite; it’s how they really are. When they leave a conversation, even if it’s with a perfect stranger, they never think “Thank God I got out of that!” Instead, they feel as if their lives have improved even the slightest bit due to having the experience they just had.

They exhibit inviting body language

Those looking for deeper connections and friendships present themselves in such a way that invites others to engage in conversation with them. They always have a friendly smile on their face, look others in the eye, and never shrug someone off. Since they know that each connection they make could potentially end up being a life-changing experience, they always appear ready to meet and greet anyone they come into contact with.

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They genuinely enjoy life

This sums up some of the other points I’ve already made, but it bears repeating. Like I said, those who thrive off of forming emotional attachments truly do enjoy even the smallest interactions between themselves and others. They live for these moments rather than seeing them as a waste of time. They never think of any moment as insignificant, and are always eager to get up and out to enjoy every single day of their life. Not only do they live to enjoy their life, but they also live to spread this joy to everyone they meet, no matter who that may be.

Featured photo credit: I’ve Got You / Toni Blay via farm1.staticflickr.com

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Last Updated on June 19, 2019

6 Ways to Be a Successful Risk Taker and Take More Chances

6 Ways to Be a Successful Risk Taker and Take More Chances

I’ve stood on the edge of my own personal cliffs many times. Each time I jumped, something different happened. There were risks that started off great, but eventually faded. There were risks that left me falling until I hit the ground. There were risks that started slow, but built into massive successes.

Every risk is different, but every risk is the same. You need to have some fundamentals ready before you jump, but not too many.

It wouldn’t be a risk if you knew everything that was about to happen, would it? Here’re 6 ways to be a successful risk taker.

1. Understand That Failure Is Going to Happen a Lot

It’s part of life. Everything we do has failure attached to it. All successful people have stories of massive failure attached to them. Thinking that your risk is going to be pain free and run as smooth as silk is insane.

Expect some pain and failure. Actually, expect a lot of it. Expect the sleepless nights with crazy thoughts of insecurity that leave you trembling under the covers. It’s going to happen, no matter how positive you are about the risk you are about to take.

When failure hits, the only options are to keep going or quit. If you expect falling into a meadow of flowers and frolicking unicorns, then you’re going to immediately quit once you realize that getting to that meadow requires you to go through a rock filled cave filled with hungry bats.

2. Trust the Muse

Writing a story isn’t a big risk. It’s really just a risk on my time. So when I start writing a story, I’m scared it will be time wasted. Of course, it never really is. Even if the story doesn’t turn out fabulous, I still practiced.

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When I’ve taken risks in my life, the successful ones always seemed to happen when I followed the muse. Steven Pressfield describes the muse,

“The Muse demands depth. Shallow does not work for her. If we’re seeking her help, we can’t stay in the kiddie end. When we work, we have to go hard and go deep.”

The muse is a goddess who wants our attention and wants us to work on our passion.

If you’re taking a risk in anything, it’s assumed that there is some passion built up behind that risk. That passion, deep inside you, is the muse. Trust it, focus on it, listen to it.

The most successful articles and stories I write are the ones I’ve focused all my attention on. There were no interruptions during their creative development. I didn’t check my phone or go watch my Twitter feed. I was fully engaged in my work.

Trust the muse, focus your attention on your risk, let the ideas and path develop themselves, and leave the distractions at the side of the road.

3. Remember to Be Authentic

Taking a risk and then turning into something you’re not, is only going to lead to disaster. Whether you are risking a new relationship or new opportunity, you must be yourself throughout the entire process.

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How many times have you acted like you loved something just because the men or woman you just started going out with loved it?

For example, I’m not an office worker. I have an incredibly hard time working in a confined timeline (ie. 9-5). That’s why I write. I can do it whenever the mood strikes, I don’t have somebody breathing down my neck, telling me that I’m five minutes late, or missed a comma somewhere. I don’t have to walk on eggshells wondering if what I’m writing will get me fired or make me lose a promotion. I can just be myself, period.

One girlfriend didn’t understand that. She believed solely in the 9-5 motto, specifically something in human resources because that was a very stable job. I was scared for my future, but I stuck with the relationship because of my own insecurities and acted like I would do it to make her happy.

Here’s a tip: NEVER take away from your happiness to make somebody else satisfied (note I didn’t say happy).

Making somebody else happy will make you happy. Doing something to satisfy somebody is murder on your soul.

4. Don’t Take Any Risks While You’re Not Clearheaded

I’d been considering the risk for a couple weeks. It all sounded good. I was 22 and I could be rich in a couple of years. That’s what they were selling me, anyways.

One night, while at a house party with some friends, I found myself at a computer. A couple of my friends were standing nearby and asked me what I was doing. I told them I was considering starting my own business and it was only going to cost me $1,500.

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Of course, when a bunch of drunk people are surrounded by more drunk people, things get enthusiastic. It sounded like the best business venture in the world to everybody, including me. So I signed up and gave them my credit card number.

A few painful months and close to $4,000 dollars lost later, I quit the business. I was young and fell into the pyramid scheme trap. It was an expensive drunk decision.

Drinking heavily and making decisions has a proven track record of failure. So when you have something important to decide, don’t let your emotions take over your brain.

5. Fully Understand What You’re Risking

It was the start of my baseball comeback. I got a tryout with a professional scout and killed it. After the tryout, he talked to my girlfriend and myself, making sure we understood I would be gone for up to 6 months at a time. That strain on the relationship could be tough.

We understood. I left to play ball, chose to stay in the city I played in, and a year later we broke up. Not because of baseball, see point 3 above. Taking big risks can have massive impacts on everything in your life from relationships to money. Know what you’re risking before you take the risk.

If you believe the risk will be worth it or you have the support you need from your family, then go ahead and make the leap.

You can get more guidance on how to take calculated risks from this article: How to Take Calculated Risk to Achieve More and Become Successful

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6. Remember This Is Your One Shot Only

As far as we know officially, this is our one shot at life, so why not take some risks?

The top thing people are saddened by on their deathbeds are these regrets. They wish they did more, asked that girl in the coffee shop out, spoke out when they should have, or did what they were passionate about.

Don’t regret. Learn and experience. Live. Take the risks you believe in. Be yourself and make the world a better place.

Now go ahead, take that risk and be successful at it!

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Featured photo credit: Unsplash via unsplash.com

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